GKSilKamina
Member
Didn't even bother going outside today. Still sitting around in my pajamas feeling despondent.
I feel ya, everything seems so pointless now. I try to play videogames but I find no joy in them anymore. I had a very bad nights sleep and my back still hurts from the awful sleep. Work seems pointless and trying to find a job in my field after I finish paying my student loan off also seems pointless, because, logic, facts, and reason are big parts of my field and I see that this country rejected all of those things so why continue to push for these things when so many have rejected logic, facts, and reasoning? I feel broken inside.Numb, just so numb. Basically slept-walked through work today, and if the other person in my department wasn't out on vacation this week, I would have honestly used up all my sick time for the rest of the year for this week and just said fuck it. Come home from work and all my usual diversions (Overwatch, Giant Bomb videos) just seem so fucking pointless, so now I'm just sitting here like a zombie, reading everyone else on the web being shocked and feeling utterly dead inside.
It's sad, but I almost wish I could just fast-forward to January and Trump actually taking office, because I just know the dread of these next few months is going to be so painful. At least we'll know how bad it's going to be by next year, but now it's just the waiting for when he's in the Oval Office that's going to be the miserable part. But once that comes, then comes the worry of what could happen to my job if and probably when the economy drops in the shitter, and all of my future plans potentially going out the window, and... I don't know. I was unemployed for 5 years, and the thought of losing my job, not having money to pay rent, and having to go back and live with my neo-con parents again puts some dark, depressing thoughts in my head. I just hope it's not as bad as it seems like right now. And that's pretty much all that's keeping me sane.
It'll wash in out in a few days, folks...this was the same that happened to red America when Obama was elected. It probably won't get better but it won't get that much worse either.
This is me at work today.Well I live in Southern Ohio so I have a fake fucking smile on my face while I internally rage at everyone around me. As an attorney I have perfected that.