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At what age should your kids move out?

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I'm 33, I moved out two years ago.

Where I work I still can't afford my own house so I share with three other people.

The UK is terrible for anyone trying to get on the property ladder, and rents are going up while wages are static.

We also have the smallest new build homes in Europe which are considered by some professionals to be damaging to mental health.

What I'd say at this point is...I don't think there is a "move out" age in the UK. We don't have the homes to move out to, and even if we did the money to get them is frankly bonkers.
 
It makes perfect sense to live in your parent's home in your 20s if it's convenient for your work and career growth and you get along with them.

In my case I essentially moved out when i went to college at 18 in another state, but I know people who did the community college to state university route and you can save a lot of money living at home & commuting to school while doing that. If you get a good job in the area afterward, pay a modest rent to your parents and you can save money and build your career without having to worry about housing or food insecurity.

It's very traditional and only stopped being a "thing" because of how ridiculously wealthy the middle class in America was for a while.
 
As long as my daughter is working, studying and handling her business I have 0 plans to ever kick her out. Right now she is only 16 months so my answer to your question would be she can stay with me forever, lol.

When my daughter feels confident in embarking it solo. I won't maintain a moocher but if she has a direction and career and is being considerate in the house I will not push her out.
 
Around 20 is just right IMO. I was a few years older (22, I think) when I permanently moved out and got my own apartment in a different city, but before then I had been studying and living at a community collage for two years, only being home for breaks and such.
 
Moved out in my mid 20s while waiting for my girlfriend (now wife) to finish college and see where she could find a job before we settled on moving somewhere.

Honestly I wish I would've stayed longer. We were able to save up so much money waiting, if we had stayed home another year or two we probably could've afforded our dream house right out of the gate.

I say stay with your parents for as long as they'll genuinely be happy to let you.
 
Let me speak from the perspective of the parent. My girls all wanted to move out in their early 20''s and I encouraged them to do so. They know they have the option to come bak home if necessary but you must, must get out there early. It only gets harder as you get older to move out. Incidentally, it being this hard out there is nothing new. It was harder in the 80's. That was time when interest rates on home loans were in the double digits and jobs were just as hard and as scarce to come by. It's only recently that owning a home became closer to reality than a dream for most folks.
 
When I was in the workforce, I moved out at 19. I recently went back to college at 23. I go back home to stay with my mother when I am on break. Depends on the situation, but yea the whole living with parents after mid-20's to early 30's thing is kinda weird. Definitely a "failure to launch" situation.
 
Einhander said:
Therein lies your flawed logic. Applying your country's beneficial policies to an entire world. Try making that work in the US for an 18 year old.
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Flawed logic? What are you talking about.
I'm sharing my views on the matter from the country I live in.
And because we have great social security and student financial programs, moving out at around 18-19 is not a 'struggle' in the slightest. In fact, it's amazing.

It's not my fault that your country is severely lacking in that regard. Fix your shit.
 
My parents had a rule that as long as you had a job to pay your bills or were in school, you could live at home. As long as you're not a free loader. My older brother was kicked out at about 19 because he was a delinquent, but that seemed to be exactly what he needed since he's been very successful over the years.

I lived at home until 27 since I was working through college very slowly, but the moment I got a good job out of college, I was out. I don't think I would have been able to make it through college or be where I am today had I bailed out earlier in life.
 
I moved out at 24, used my time at home to save like a bastard which helped me get my first house. Had I moved out at 20 that wouldn't have happened or it would have dramatically changed when and what I could buy.

My brother moved out for 9 months at 18, realised he loved it and he wanted it long term, so moved home and saved like a bastard. Moved out properly at 24.

I totally get people moving out for Uni, but after that if its at all possible, move home, save money and go from there. Its not always an option for many reasons of course.
 
Depends on where you live, what nation, and your family wealth.

I think generational living is going to make a big comeback in the western world.

Esp. in the USA.
 
Other than some time away during college, I moved out when I was 23 and moved to another country. If I had taken a job nearby, I probably would have stayed at home for at least a couple of more years.

My kids are still very young, and while I can't foresee the future and how our relationships will turn out, I don't see any reason to hastily get them out of the house. Who knows what the economy will be like or what their situations will be once they grow up. Then again, I'm much more a proponent of families sticking together and helping each other out.
 
Nose Master said:
I can see the appeal of staying at home past 20, but it seems like opting into stunting your social growth. Bringing a girl home to meet the parents immediately or asking mom if you can have friends over when you're that old is absurd.
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Eh. Personally, I still live at home... In exchange, I have more disposable income and savings than others my age. So it's not something that's hurting me really.

And I'm more than fine socially, too. Idk what the rush is about.
 
Neoleo2143 said:
When I'm financially stable and have a good job and apartment to move into. I have no intention of needlessly struggling.
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It's not a needless struggle if you learn something along the way. There's a lot of value to be gained from learning to make ends meet. Lot of people posting about how they want to stay in the nest as long as possible so they can save to buy a house. To each his own, but they are missing out on a lot of personal growth and even a lot of fun experiences. A lot of focus on "me" too. Screw the parents and what's best for them.

I got married as soon as I got out of college.. 1 week after exactly. Wife had a shitty job and I had squat. I went to graduate school and paid for it as I went along (while married), so working/research/teaching, etc. We had to balance the check book to buy a couple cans of soup, and we still remember the conversations. Well, what do we want for dinner... how much money do we have? etc. It was good for us. It was hard as hell. We had a landlord along the way that agreed to let us pay a couple hundred less per month early on when we didn't have the money, as long as we'd pay a couple hundred extra per month later on when we were able to do so. Had to negotiate hard on that one. I think we both picked up a lot of life skills during that time and it's all fond memories. The first place we rented was condemned and torn down right after we moved out.

I'm sure it would have been a lot easier to live with parents instead, rather than take chances and make it work. The option was there too, but it was better to pass on it and just know it's a safety net in case we couldn't make it work. But we had to try.
 
My cousin just turned 30 and he's still living at home. Nice dude, went to college, and graduated just as the recession hit. He didn't get an internship, and has been permanently behind ever since. Now he has a steady job as a personal trainer, which is not even tangentially related to his major (Graphic Design).

Here's the mindblowing part, he met a girl at the gym. They were going out, and he proposed. That just blows my mind, how can you propose before you move out?

I'm still in college, so I guess I lack perspective, but it feels like he could stretch his money and get his own place. That feels like a neccesary step before proposing IMO
 
Ideally 18 for college then a couple months to a year after college so they can save/find a job.

Realistically, until they are financially capable of supporting themselves without significant struggle. If i'm rich, daddy's paying for their condo somewhere as soon as its legal for them to live alone.
 
Socal. Late 20s and half the people I know still live at home, maybe more. It's pretty common around here. I'd say it depends on the area that you live in and what the job and housing markets are like there.
It's tough around here. College->job doesn't work like it used to and wages have not kept pace with costs. Incurring enormous student debt just to turn around and realize it doesnt actually help that much isnt nice either. You see kids moving out sooner in the higher class areas because parents with big pockets paid for their schooling and still partially support then after they've left. In a place like Idaho for example you can stretch your dollar a lot farther than you can in California. I've noticed that some jobs pay almost the same rate across multiple state lines, but in one state rent can be found for $400 in the heart of the city and the other state rent is $2100 at the edge of town. The same job and the same education don't mean the same thing to everyone.

Here, it just makes more sense to stick around until you're more financially established instead of jumping right out into the world with your part time job at the book store.
 
It's absolutely standard here in Taiwan for people to live with their parents until they start a family of their own. The motel industry kind of depends on that tradition, I think. So, mid-30s and living with mom and dad is pretty common. That said, I'm a foreigner who lives with a roommate, and it's not entirely unheard of for young men and women to go out on their own in their 20s. It's just harder to have the fiscal means to do that, as most people in their 20s will be making less than $1000 US per month.

In America recent college grads can easily earn double or triple that amount, so it's easier to get a place of your own.
 
I moved out at 18, went to college and only returned during my first winter break. My family isn't wealthy so it was a big deal for me to become independent [from my family] as soon as possible so that they would not have to worry about supporting me.

But geez I don't blame people staying with their parents until they are 30. I would offer that to my future children.
 
Whatever works.

Children leaving the nest before marriage is actually a recent cultural phenomenon that lines up with the excesses and boom times of post WWII economies.

Before it was common to only move out when married, and even then the parents would usually move IN with their child's family once the child rearing was done on their part.

Today? We're reverting to the norm, since stretching yourself financially early on compounds problems later.

CSB time: Moved out at 18 and went to college and only ever went back for breaks, being close made it easier to drop by however. Right out of college moved to Boston and everything went well untill the 2008 crash caught up with my industry and was laid off with half the city in my industry in 2010. Traveled the US on a road trip for 14 months, and then moved back in with the parents 2012-2016.

It sucked and was embarrassing, but upon getting a job back once the glut subsided I was able to pay off 20k in student loans and save enough to buy property in Boston 15 min from work in only four years. Just getting out of the renting game is a huge.

Now I have my own place, I'm debt free besides a mortgage, and pretty much loving it.
 
I don't think it matters as long as the child is being proactive with their life.
My son will be able to stay at my house for as long as he needs to, so long as he is making moves towards bettering his life. So if he wants to spend up till his 30s to get a masters / doctorate degree, so long as he is following the rules of the house and works i'm fine with that.
I'd have a problem if somebody is stationing their life at my house though.
 
AlfonzoPalutena said:
My cousin just turned 30 and he's still living at home. Nice dude, went to college, and graduated just as the recession hit. He didn't get an internship, and has been permanently behind ever since. Now he has a steady job as a personal trainer, which is not even tangentially related to his major (Graphic Design).

Here's the mindblowing part, he met a girl at the gym. They were going out, and he proposed. That just blows my mind, how can you propose before you move out?

I'm still in college, so I guess I lack perspective, but it feels like he could stretch his money and get his own place. That feels like a neccesary step before proposing IMO
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My parents still lived at home when they got engaged. My husband and I still lived at home as well. He proposed to me 2 months after I turned 18. We both lived at home another 2 years to go to college together. After college we both got jobs and moved out but looking back I wish we had gone to school more before moving out and gotten better jobs instead of being impatient. Everything has worked out for us as a couple but I think we would be better off financially if we had stayed home longer.
 
I technically moved out at 18 for college, coming back during summers and technically moved out again at 22 to go to grad school, but I still left most of my stuff with my parents since my current place is way too small to take it with me.

Sometimes I wish I hadn't because I would be so rich right now if I'd stayed at home instead of paying for rent, but at the same time, I'd have to live on my parents time table, which is pretty incompatible with grad student life.
 
It's pretty much impossible for me to live on my own as an unemployed 20 year old in London. Hell, if I had a good job and saved, I still wouldn't be able to move out 'til my mid to late twenties.
 
I've never understood the social stigma revolving around staying at home late, heck stay there forever if both the parents and child are comfortable - but at the same time I feel it needs to be a two way street. If your child is going to stay past high school or college years I feel they should pay rent as well and contribute in a way you would if you were sharing an apartment or something. If they just want to sit at home and do nothing then I wouldn't tolerate them after high school.
 
I moved out four months after my 19th birthday. I needed to borrow $300 from my dad about six months later, but I paid him back in two weeks. Never moved back and never borrowed money from him or anyone else ever again. That has been almost 20 years. To answer the OP's question, I think people can stay as long as they need to and as long as their family is happy to have them there.
 
I'm 21 and I live at home because I sure as hell cant afford to live in anything but seedy shared accommodations while being a full time student and working part time. But then I wouldn't be able to afford anything else, so.

And I sure don't want to move out and live with strangers, but then I also don't have $1100+ to afford accommodation for myself alone in this city.
 
Sch1sm said:
I'm 21 and I live at home because I sure as hell cant afford to live in anything but seedy shared accommodations while being a full time student and working part time. But then I wouldn't be able to afford anything else, so.

And I sure don't want to move out and live with strangers, but then I also don't have $1100+ to afford accommodation for myself alone in this city.
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I think living with roommates is a good learning experience for people to go through.
 
I'm 18 and am finishing up high school right now and will head off to college in August. I personally cannot imagine living on my own in an apartment or somthing of that nature right now in my life.
 
Depends on the country.

Most people i know in Greece will end up taking care of their mothers. That's also me in my 30's right now.
 
Our son is 25, served in the army in Afghanistan, and now lives at home. Our daughter is 22, until recently employed, and she lives at home. We've never pushed, and don't mind having them. But do I have concerns about them being able to be fully functional people without the life experience that taking care of yourself brings.

We're not kicking them out though.
 
When it makes sense for them socially and economically. As a parent I do expect this to be before they're 40 but certainly I wouldn't push my kids out earlier than they were ready in some arbitrary way.

Obviously if your children have special care needs that preclude leaving home that's a different story.
 
MGrant said:
Jeeeez. Where the fuck do you live where $900 as your share of the rent with 2 cohabitants makes sense? You could live in NYC for that money.
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They broke it down to

$350 Rent
$200 Car payment (I bought my mom's truck from her for $10,000 on a payment plan)
$50 Internet
$75 Food
$85 Car insurance
$50 Phone

So I actually did the math wrong in my head and it's $810 but still. It's about the same if I moved out, if maybe a little cheaper.

And then I techinally have a minimum $173 of student loan each month. My wallet is fucked.

I tried asking if I could get it lowered or dropped completely so I could, you know, save money but I am met with "hell no, you ain't living here for free!" I guess it could be worse, I could be homeless...
 
To answer the OP, there is no age anymore because the economy is ruined. I recently moved back home after living in LA for almost two years paying too much to live in a shitty studio in filthy ass Koreatown in shitville LA. 90% of my income was going towards having the "privilege" of living in a major metropolitan area and a "cultural epicenter". What a fucking pleasure.
 
MrChom said:
What I'd say at this point is...I don't think there is a "move out" age in the UK. We don't have the homes to move out to, and even if we did the money to get them is frankly bonkers.
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This is critical, especially in London and the South. If I wanted to find anywhere half decent back home in London then I'd be looking at close to half a million to buy my own place for example. In your mid-late 20's, that just isn't viable for most people and there's no housing market crash in sight.
 
I think it depends on the specific family in question.

Personally, I wanted to move out as soon as I could. My parents are not bad people, but I fucking hated living with them. I got a job, and once I had enough money to pay first, last, and a security deposit, I left. I was skint; took me two months to justify spending money on a real bed, was on an air mattress for awhile.

I was 23 when I moved out, which seemed like a good age. It wasn't the best financial decision, my savings is still relatively minor and I have a lot of student loan debt left, but living at home made me miserable.

Not sure how I'd approach it as a parent, I'd probably let them stay throughout school and maybe for a year afterwards, but I'd try to discourage them from staying forever.
 
StoneFox said:
They broke it down to

$350 Rent
$200 Car payment (I bought my mom's truck from her for $10,000 on a payment plan)
$50 Internet
$75 Food
$85 Car insurance
$50 Phone

So I actually did the math wrong in my head and it's $810 but still. It's about the same if I moved out, if maybe a little cheaper.

And then I techinally have a minimum $173 of student loan each month. My wallet is fucked.

I tried asking if I could get it lowered or dropped completely so I could, you know, save money but I am met with "hell no, you ain't living here for free!" I guess it could be worse, I could be homeless...
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To be fair, you're paying 350 to live at your parents house. Those other costs would follow you anywhere else you go, unless you decided to jettison the car or the phone.
 
MatrixMan.EXE said:
This is critical, especially in London and the South. If I wanted to find anywhere half decent back home in London then I'd be looking at close to half a million to buy my own place for example. In your mid-late 20's, that just isn't viable for most people and there's no housing market crash in sight.
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Why don't you just rent a place like most people?
 
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