How About No
Member
Pretty much what you said. You now get all the time in the world for yourself, even if you don't know what you wanna do, and the exploration and indecision can be painful
No it made more sense in my head sorry
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Breakups..it hurts..it hurts so much..
- Thread starter _Nemo
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Pretty much what you said. You now get all the time in the world for yourself, even if you don't know what you wanna do, and the exploration and indecision can be painful
No it made more sense in my head sorry
echoshifting
Banned
Sorry to hear that Nemo. Well, we're here for you, you can talk to us if it helps.
Stereogatari
Banned
Unfortunately it's supposed to hurt.
Makes sense that it hurts so much then. Good luck with everything OP.
I've been in a position where I felt exactly the same, but the truth was far from it.
I don't mean to push, but it can feel very hopeless in this situation and make you feel very isolated.
Is there absolutely no person you could call to speak with? No family member, absolutely no one you think would be willing?
Uhhhh...it was going to be a joke. I was going to imply that he can just "stop it," but the overly sensitive force is out already. Take a joke.
If it was a joke, it was a terrible one. I don't see how the blunt command "stop it" could be seen as humorous in context, anyway.
breakfuss
Member
Since OP won't provide any context I peeked over at their thread history to see what might have happened. Not that it diminishes what you feel for this person, but didn't you guys just meet a couple months ago?
As of others have said, it gets better. It does. Might not seem like it now though. And that's okay.
As of others have said, it gets better. It does. Might not seem like it now though. And that's okay.
If he doesn't have a support network, it can be far too easy to overly (and quickly) attach yourself to someone. I'm sorry, OP. I hope you feel better soon.
John Kowalski
Banned
It's not your fault.
CliqWriter
Member
Sounds like if you had no friends you may have been spending too much time with the gf. Unless you two have no friends together.
Ink owner hurts bro. Experience something new whether it's a new girl, beer, workout. Something.
Ink owner hurts bro. Experience something new whether it's a new girl, beer, workout. Something.
BannedEpisode
Member
It sucks for at a while buckle up hombre.
Switch Back 9
a lot of my threads involve me fucking up somehow. Perhaps I'm a moron?
Everybody is going to go against the idea I'm about to suggest because, well, it's GAF.
Go get drunk OP. Get super drunk, so drunk you can't stand. Have a nice long drunken sobbing session and THEN follow the advice posted in this thread about travelling, working on yourself etc.
Allow one night for sloppy intoxicated weeping and then move on.
Go get drunk OP. Get super drunk, so drunk you can't stand. Have a nice long drunken sobbing session and THEN follow the advice posted in this thread about travelling, working on yourself etc.
Allow one night for sloppy intoxicated weeping and then move on.
Yeh, not that it could possibly be a bad idea.
How About No
Member
Well if he's serious about not having friends maaaaybe not the best idea
Unless we can do a drunken GAF-chat with him. I'll pay
1. Go do some karaoke at the bar, you don't have to get drunk or even drink if you don't want to. But this will make you get out there and have some fun, you will meet people, and maybe make some friends. You do not have to be good at singing either, if you're at a nice place.
2. Is this your first break up? If so, write a letter of all of your thoughts on paper, how you feel, what you wish could be, and then ball it up through it away and burn it.
2. Is this your first break up? If so, write a letter of all of your thoughts on paper, how you feel, what you wish could be, and then ball it up through it away and burn it.
Yep it sucks. Gonna be honest, it's been over a year since my last one and it still stings. I've done everything you're supposed to do - got in great shape, spent time with friends, invested in my hobbies, made strides at my office, dated / fucked other people, etc. I still miss her like crazy and the only thing that helps is just suppressing emotion altogether.
It's really hard but just try not to let your happiness depend on other people.
It's really hard but just try not to let your happiness depend on other people.
entremet
Member
This is what helped me.
You will never lose the feelings. They will always be there somewhat. If you're always fighting your feelings, wishing them to go way, you will only frustrate yourself.
Accept that you're human. Accept that you will always have those feelings somewhat.
When you do that, it will be easier to finally move on.
You can love again. But don't stuff your feelings in. Find good channels to harness them. Heck, this is source of some of the best art.
The temptation is to forget or numb yourself. That does not work. Obviously, obsessive dwelling doesn't help, but if the feelings come, let them. It's fine.
mingoguaya
Member
Whatever you do, cut all contact and don't ever text her for any reason at all. And you will find yourself writing a long ass message, but just as you are about to hit the "Send" button, read it again and delete it. Don't send her no messages or call her at all for a good while. Trust me, you will never be able to move on if you do this.
Knuckle Sandwich
Member
Yep. Made this mistake in my early 20s. Girl I was in love with dumped me and I ended up texting/pming/emailing her for a while. She never replied. I cringe thinking about it.
mingoguaya
Member
Even worse is when they reply and you think you have a chance so you keep on trying and messaging her and eventually she finds another person and you are stuck with nothing but lost time.
Yep I let myself get emotionally used by an ex for 6 months until she told me she met someone and fell in love with him. One of the worst feelings ever
paragonpro
Banned
It sucks at first. But focus all of this negativity toward something positive or creative. Spend time with your friends. Being alone and dwelling on it is bad for both of you
I also made this mistake. You will only regret it. Heed our warnings
I also made this mistake. You will only regret it. Heed our warnings
Jack The Nipper
Banned
I use to feel that too op, now I just don't give a shit at all and I'm the one telling them to get out.
I just pick up halo or something and feel so relieved they are out.
People get so needy and want you to just do what they won't and if it isn't a good option to be around im better not having them around.
I don't think I can feel like that again. I suggest just not caring and seeing why you don't want to be around them.
After all it is just one person. Why would you not want someone else who is more compatible. Think about it
I just pick up halo or something and feel so relieved they are out.
People get so needy and want you to just do what they won't and if it isn't a good option to be around im better not having them around.
I don't think I can feel like that again. I suggest just not caring and seeing why you don't want to be around them.
After all it is just one person. Why would you not want someone else who is more compatible. Think about it
It was a joke. I assumed he would respond and I would continue. Just because you or someone on GAF believes its a terrible joke doesn't actually make it terrible. Opinions. Sorry if it offended you. Just trying to lighten the mood.
Polioliolio
Member
When you are sure it's over, it's time to start a new life. Get excited about being a better you, and happiness will return in time!
Something that helped me, my sister said, "you're at A and you want to get to C, but you have to go through B first." What you're experiencing is unavoidable. You have to feel pain before you feel better, but you will!
Agreed on working out, etc. Take time now to do things you've always wanted to do but never did. Have some fresh experiences alone or with friends and family. Make a day trip and go canoeing or hiking. Get out of your element. It's time to live again, and that's something you can do alone, believe it or not.
And if partnership is what you want, you'll find love again, in time. The sooner you feel good, the more attractive you'll be too, so just relax, do new things, exercise, have fun, be productive!
Edit: get off the social media, throw out or put into storage photos of you and girlfriend, etc. put the past behind you and move into the future!
Something that helped me, my sister said, "you're at A and you want to get to C, but you have to go through B first." What you're experiencing is unavoidable. You have to feel pain before you feel better, but you will!
Agreed on working out, etc. Take time now to do things you've always wanted to do but never did. Have some fresh experiences alone or with friends and family. Make a day trip and go canoeing or hiking. Get out of your element. It's time to live again, and that's something you can do alone, believe it or not.
And if partnership is what you want, you'll find love again, in time. The sooner you feel good, the more attractive you'll be too, so just relax, do new things, exercise, have fun, be productive!
Edit: get off the social media, throw out or put into storage photos of you and girlfriend, etc. put the past behind you and move into the future!
GamingOblivion
Banned
I feel ya OP. Been dealing with a breakup for a week now. You can do this, yo!
GamingOblivion
Banned
If you meant no offense why did you say it
ZackieChan
Member
How long were you together, OP? What happened?
Just so you know, OP. I was going to make a running joke. If it offended you I apologize, but as my first post states, time will definitely help you. It's the only thing no matter how much you hurt right now. I've been there...most of us have been there. You'll pull through. If you do not have anyone to talk to...then talk to us. Tell us the story.
The Antitype
Banned
Breakups always hurt.
It WILL get better. But it will feel like you've been shot in the gut for weeks.
Spend as much time as you can with friends.
Take note of any long games in your pile of shame that you've been putting off. Dive in. My easiest breakup happened right before the release of Red Dead Redemption.
Bring your self together and think that the sun is going to shine the same with or without her and is in your self the ability to go forward. Is good to think about the past but the future is coming and you have two choices, be passive and let it come as someone watching television or you try to influence it with the hope that something of value may come with it.
ElMexiMerican
Member
I feel for you. I went through a really painful breakup several months ago, and it's going to hurt for a few weeks. Do you have any hobbies? If you do, really concentrate your focus and emotions towards at least one of them. If you have none, try and find something that interests you, and start doing that. Finding something that keeps your mind off of the other person and isn't harmful to yourself is probably the best piece of advice I can give you.
Man, I'm sorry to hear that, but things will get better with time. I know that statement sucks, but it's true. I promise. May I ask how long you and your ex dated for?
I know this doesnt help now, but it absolutely gets better. I understand your hurting, but I promise it is not the end. You will find someone again, and now that youve gone through this, youll be much stronger during the next relationship.
My advice though, dont call or text your ex. Leave her to her own thoughts for awhile, and if she calls you or tries to contact you, then answer and have a conversation. But dont do what Ive done all too often and blow up their phone with texts. Its not worth the pain youll feel when she doesnt respond, or even worse, doesnt respond the way youd hope she would.
It will suck for awhile man. But I promise, it gets better.
One thing that helped me was watching Swingers. If youve never seen that movie, give it a shot man. It really helped me alot.
Best wishes mate.
My advice though, dont call or text your ex. Leave her to her own thoughts for awhile, and if she calls you or tries to contact you, then answer and have a conversation. But dont do what Ive done all too often and blow up their phone with texts. Its not worth the pain youll feel when she doesnt respond, or even worse, doesnt respond the way youd hope she would.
It will suck for awhile man. But I promise, it gets better.
One thing that helped me was watching Swingers. If youve never seen that movie, give it a shot man. It really helped me alot.
Best wishes mate.
GamingOblivion
Banned
Did you quote the wrong person
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