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[Miles Quaritch]

Yes attraction can grow. The only way for you to know for sure is to get to know the person more. Physical attraction is the very first thing that draws us to someone then from there we usually attempt to get to know the person to see if they are someone we can date.

For me, if I'm not at least partially attracted to the person physically then I will never ever date them. It doesn't matter how good of a person they are, if I don't think they are pretty then I will never want to date them. If they are really pretty and I find out they are very unintelligent then I drop them. I have no fat female friends and I have never and will never date a fat overweight girl either. If I ever get married and the wife starts to gain weight, I will give her a chance to lose it otherwise I am gone- this type of agreement will be in a contract the future wife will need to sign before marriage. I don't care how much I love the person she will get dropped for becoming fat. I've even made a fat girl cry because she wanted to get with me and I proceeded to tell her how fat she is and how repulsive it makes her look. YOU should really not waste this girls time if you feel the way you feel. You are already questioning her looks which is a warning sign now that it WILL become a problem in your relationship with this girl if it gets that far.

Were you overweight at some point so now hold a lot of anger towards overweight people with a directed and almost worrying hate for overweight women.

 

[Media]

Your OP reads like someone shopping for bedsheets on amazon, "This one is kind of ugly, but the thread count is good, looks comfortable and it's cheap, maybe I'll like it after I buy it?" After reading the rest of your posts, I can finally understand why.

Yeah, I just wanted to chime in with, as a western woman, how disturbing it is to see someone approaching a relationship as if they were shopping at the market. I don't want to poo poo on other cultures, but I'm so glad I was born a woman somewhere else.

 

[Miles Quaritch]

Ok some clarifications needed. I wrote that OP quickly.

I just got off the phone to a relative who said that all he looked for in a wife was a good mother etc... and that "prettiness" was not important to him. That is why I asked the questions in the OP in the manner that I did (it was in my mind at the time I wrote it). You may be able to tell that we come from a culture that does not have physical relations before marriage. And in these types of cultures we are unfortunately restricted to who we can marry because of the silliness of some people. We are muslim and although our religion does not restrict us from marrying other races, there are issues with the community which prevents it. Thus I am restricted in who I can marry and it's not something I am able to overcome.

I can date but no physical relationships. And the girl does wear hijab.

I have met/dated a lot of girls and I don't like the ones in my community. Girls from other communities are mostly out of the equation because their families are stubborn culture worshippers. Unfortunately I tend to be rather fussy about looks. I don't know if it's because of the way I look or because of the girls in my family being good looking. Anyhow call me arrogant or whatever. I can't help how I feel.

This particular girl is from abroad. I met her online. I have visited her a few times. And from a day to day basis I either find her attractive or a bit off putting. I wonder if it's her scarf and she may wear it differently each day. Or maybe it's that big gummy smile which I don't see on days that I like her.

It's been a year now and we are talking about marriage but these doubts bother me. She is a very very fragile/sensitive girl who was afraid of marriage (number of divorced people in her family) at first but overcame it after talking to me. She is pretty sure she wants to marry me but I am undecided. I will destroy her heart for years if I say no. On the other hand I do like her on some days. It's almost like I am meeting a pretty girl one day and one that I really do on like on another. I have never seen this in any girl that I have met. Usually there is consistency in how attractive I find someone.

I am in a messed up situation. Between a rock and a hard place.

I'm curious what country she's from where she's treated like this and where she has literally zero marriage opportunities apart from you who is apparently her shining knight to save her.

 

[CrazyHorse]

Is this for real? Honestly, I appreciate the reality of attraction, but the post is really kinda dark in its blatant vanity. It's a joke thread, right?

Another, clarification ... I typed it left-handed, because my right hand has some injury. So it's written in a hasty way. Makes me sound like a robot.

 

[Keri]

I wish I had a choice!!

I cannot stress how happy I am, to have been born outside the repressive culture you describe. I can't fully understand your situation, but I think the best advice is to give it more time and try to meet her in person a couple more times, before you make a decision. I think it's true that attraction grows with love. It's why couples continue to have happy and fulfilling relationships, long past their physical prime and it's why arranged marriages are typically successful.

 

[Jacksinthe]

This thread is fucked up :|

 

[viciouskillersquirrel]

Yeah, I just wanted to chime in with, as a western woman, how disturbing it is to see someone approaching a relationship as if they were shopping at the market. I don't want to poo poo on other cultures, but I'm so glad I was born a woman somewhere else.

This is how all cultures approach relationships, as a marketplace. The currency being bartered with and the value placed on different aspects differs, but the behaviour is fundamentally the same. We compete with other people to maximise the value we get from that market and all have different aims as to what we'll get out of it. Some walk in with huge advantages and make a killing, while others have little to offer and end up with nothing. All this creates the tension, drama and all the good stuff of Jane Austen's novels.

Unless you have arranged marriages, shopping at the market is the perfect analogy for the social politics around relationships.

The OP is being unusually cold and frank about it, but he's only verbalising what the rest of us do at a subconscious and societal level.

 

[liquidtmd]

For me, if I'm not at least partially attracted to the person physically then I will never ever date them. It doesn't matter how good of a person they are, if I don't think they are pretty then I will never want to date them. If they are really pretty and I find out they are very unintelligent then I drop them. I have no fat female friends and I have never and will never date a fat overweight girl either. If I ever get married and the wife starts to gain weight, I will give her a chance to lose it otherwise I am gone- this type of agreement will be in a contract the future wife will need to sign before marriage. I don't care how much I love the person she will get dropped for becoming fat. I've even made a fat girl cry because she wanted to get with me and I proceeded to tell her how fat she is and how repulsive it makes her look. YOU should really not waste this girls time if you feel the way you feel. You are already questioning her looks which is a warning sign now that it WILL become a problem in your relationship with this girl if it gets that far.

If that's your attitude to blunt truths, I hope dearly many people tell you that's a fucking horrible thing to do and you're a shitty, scummy person for doing it.

Edit: Jesus, your second ever post on this forum and that's what you go with??

 

[True Savior]

The rule is that couples tend to be of similar levels of attractiveness. Lately I've noticed more guys better looking than the girl counterpart but I don't feel that's a trend but more my brain noticing it more. I do know one thing. I have seen much (much) more very good looking guys with normal girls than the contrary.

 

[Isotropy]

Why don't you compile a list of possible elective surgeries she could undergo to fix her disgusting horse face and give it to her.

I feel like this relationship is already off to a great start!

 

[Miles Quaritch]

The rule is that couples tend to be of similar levels of attractiveness. Lately I've noticed more guys better looking than the girl counterpart but I don't feel that's a trend but more my brain noticing it more. I do know one thing. I have seen much (much) more very good looking guys with normal girls than the contrary.

I wonder how much online dating has contributed to this.

 

[Crimson-Death]

So many pearls of wisdom in this thread, lol.

 

[T.O.P]

Yes attraction can grow. The only way for you to know for sure is to get to know the person more. Physical attraction is the very first thing that draws us to someone then from there we usually attempt to get to know the person to see if they are someone we can date.

For me, if I'm not at least partially attracted to the person physically then I will never ever date them. It doesn't matter how good of a person they are, if I don't think they are pretty then I will never want to date them. If they are really pretty and I find out they are very unintelligent then I drop them. I have no fat female friends and I have never and will never date a fat overweight girl either. If I ever get married and the wife starts to gain weight, I will give her a chance to lose it otherwise I am gone- this type of agreement will be in a contract the future wife will need to sign before marriage. I don't care how much I love the person she will get dropped for becoming fat. I've even made a fat girl cry because she wanted to get with me and I proceeded to tell her how fat she is and how repulsive it makes her look. YOU should really not waste this girls time if you feel the way you feel. You are already questioning her looks which is a warning sign now that it WILL become a problem in your relationship with this girl if it gets that far.

Blunt and a bit too harsh, but I agree

 

[DOWN]

Don't date someone expecting change to make it better over time

 

[viciouskillersquirrel]

Why don't you compile a list of possible elective surgeries she could undergo to fix her disgusting horse face and give it to her.

I feel like this relationship is already off to a great start!

You joke, but the right plastic surgery can be life changing to people born with a deformity. It can give a confodence boost that radically alters a person's life trajectory and change how others treat them. Cleft palates are a prime example.

Not saying that this is any sort of answer to the OP's dilemma, of course. Plastic surgery should be a personal choice and always done to make the person themselves happy, not for the sake of anyone else.

Plastic surgery won't fix underlying self esteem issues either, so if you think you're ugly because you have a warped perception of yourself, it can be actively harmful.

 

[CrazyHorse]

Why don't you compile a list of possible elective surgeries she could undergo to fix her disgusting horse face and give it to her.

I feel like this relationship is already off to a great start!

Quite frankly I hate this situation. I feel like an absolute fool. I don't know what to do and I just have to hope things work out ... I don't know how that will happen but I hope it does.

I think I shouldn't respond to this thread anymore because I am so lost and confused.

I appreciate all your replies but I am in a humbling situation over which I feel completely lost. I could end up hurting people whatever route I take. We already started making arrangements for marriage and it's just a mess .....

Thanks for your replies all. I feel humbled and lost.

:'‑( :'‑( :'‑( :'‑( :'‑(

 

[RustyNails]

Yes attraction can grow. The only way for you to know for sure is to get to know the person more. Physical attraction is the very first thing that draws us to someone then from there we usually attempt to get to know the person to see if they are someone we can date.

For me, if I'm not at least partially attracted to the person physically then I will never ever date them. It doesn't matter how good of a person they are, if I don't think they are pretty then I will never want to date them. If they are really pretty and I find out they are very unintelligent then I drop them. I have no fat female friends and I have never and will never date a fat overweight girl either. If I ever get married and the wife starts to gain weight, I will give her a chance to lose it otherwise I am gone- this type of agreement will be in a contract the future wife will need to sign before marriage. I don't care how much I love the person she will get dropped for becoming fat. I've even made a fat girl cry because she wanted to get with me and I proceeded to tell her how fat she is and how repulsive it makes her look. YOU should really not waste this girls time if you feel the way you feel. You are already questioning her looks which is a warning sign now that it WILL become a problem in your relationship with this girl if it gets that far.

Do you think that's an ok thing to say to someone?

 

[Wads]

I can't really relate to your situation, but if it doesn't feel 100% right you definitely should just move onto a situation you feel more comfortable with. Whatever your reasons, if it doesn't feel right going in, it probably isn't.

 

[captainraincoat]

Attraction grows with every beer you have

 

[Incitemaybe]

Leave the girl alone. You should very childish.

 

[T.O.P]

Attraction grows with every beer you have

This is unfortunately true

 

[LookAtMeGo]

Attraction grows with every beer you have

Or standards lessen.

 

[Naked Snake]

Why don't you compile a list of possible elective surgeries she could undergo to fix her disgusting horse face and give it to her.

I feel like this relationship is already off to a great start!

Bruh

 

[Montresor]

Yes attraction can grow. The only way for you to know for sure is to get to know the person more. Physical attraction is the very first thing that draws us to someone then from there we usually attempt to get to know the person to see if they are someone we can date.

For me, if I'm not at least partially attracted to the person physically then I will never ever date them. It doesn't matter how good of a person they are, if I don't think they are pretty then I will never want to date them. If they are really pretty and I find out they are very unintelligent then I drop them. I have no fat female friends and I have never and will never date a fat overweight girl either. If I ever get married and the wife starts to gain weight, I will give her a chance to lose it otherwise I am gone- this type of agreement will be in a contract the future wife will need to sign before marriage. I don't care how much I love the person she will get dropped for becoming fat. I've even made a fat girl cry because she wanted to get with me and I proceeded to tell her how fat she is and how repulsive it makes her look. YOU should really not waste this girls time if you feel the way you feel. You are already questioning her looks which is a warning sign now that it WILL become a problem in your relationship with this girl if it gets that far.

You're a piece of shit. It's okay to not be attracted to fat people. But these are red flags here:

1) If you get married and the wife starts to gain weight, she'll have an ultimatum to lose weight and if she doesn't you're gone.

2) You want a prenuptial agreement for your marriage(s) with the stipulation: Not allowed to get fat.

3) You're needlessly cruel and hurtful, telling a girl she is repulsive because of how fat she looks.

Regarding #1, what if the wife is your soul mate, and ends up being the mother to your children, and at age 40 (15 years into the marriage, as an example), she starts to get depressed and gains 30 pounds. You're fucking gone?

 

[Mawnster]

You're a piece of shit. It's okay to not be attracted to fat people. But these are red flags here:

1) If you get married and the wife starts to gain weight, she'll have an ultimatum to lose weight and if she doesn't you're gone.

2) You want a prenuptial agreement for your marriage(s) with the stipulation: Not allowed to get fat.

3) You're needlessly cruel and hurtful, telling a girl she is repulsive because of how fat she looks.

4) He says he doesn't have fat friends. How does their weight affect their friendship, wtf.

 

[N.Domixis]

one thing I don't understand, how do you guys date someone you aren't attracted to? How does that even happen? Seen a couple posts like this.

 

[motherxwolf]

Yes attraction can grow. The only way for you to know for sure is to get to know the person more. Physical attraction is the very first thing that draws us to someone then from there we usually attempt to get to know the person to see if they are someone we can date.

For me, if I'm not at least partially attracted to the person physically then I will never ever date them. It doesn't matter how good of a person they are, if I don't think they are pretty then I will never want to date them. If they are really pretty and I find out they are very unintelligent then I drop them. I have no fat female friends and I have never and will never date a fat overweight girl either. If I ever get married and the wife starts to gain weight, I will give her a chance to lose it otherwise I am gone- this type of agreement will be in a contract the future wife will need to sign before marriage. I don't care how much I love the person she will get dropped for becoming fat. I've even made a fat girl cry because she wanted to get with me and I proceeded to tell her how fat she is and how repulsive it makes her look. YOU should really not waste this girls time if you feel the way you feel. You are already questioning her looks which is a warning sign now that it WILL become a problem in your relationship with this girl if it gets that far.

monster

 

[Naked Snake]

one thing I don't understand, how do you guys date someone you aren't attracted to? How does that even happen? Seen a couple posts like this.

Political correctness gone too far.

Or naivety.

 

[T.O.P]

one thing I don't understand, how do you guys date someone you aren't attracted to? How does that even happen? Seen a couple posts like this.

Care to quote? (on mobile) but i'm quite curious about how this can happen tbh

 

[kitchenmotors]

Yes attraction can grow. The only way for you to know for sure is to get to know the person more. Physical attraction is the very first thing that draws us to someone then from there we usually attempt to get to know the person to see if they are someone we can date.

For me, if I'm not at least partially attracted to the person physically then I will never ever date them. It doesn't matter how good of a person they are, if I don't think they are pretty then I will never want to date them. If they are really pretty and I find out they are very unintelligent then I drop them. I have no fat female friends and I have never and will never date a fat overweight girl either. If I ever get married and the wife starts to gain weight, I will give her a chance to lose it otherwise I am gone- this type of agreement will be in a contract the future wife will need to sign before marriage. I don't care how much I love the person she will get dropped for becoming fat. I've even made a fat girl cry because she wanted to get with me and I proceeded to tell her how fat she is and how repulsive it makes her look. YOU should really not waste this girls time if you feel the way you feel. You are already questioning her looks which is a warning sign now that it WILL become a problem in your relationship with this girl if it gets that far.

Jesus christ.

And just when I think this thread couldn't get any worse.

 

[How About No]

Yes attraction can grow. The only way for you to know for sure is to get to know the person more. Physical attraction is the very first thing that draws us to someone then from there we usually attempt to get to know the person to see if they are someone we can date.

For me, if I'm not at least partially attracted to the person physically then I will never ever date them. It doesn't matter how good of a person they are, if I don't think they are pretty then I will never want to date them. If they are really pretty and I find out they are very unintelligent then I drop them. I have no fat female friends and I have never and will never date a fat overweight girl either. If I ever get married and the wife starts to gain weight, I will give her a chance to lose it otherwise I am gone- this type of agreement will be in a contract the future wife will need to sign before marriage. I don't care how much I love the person she will get dropped for becoming fat. I've even made a fat girl cry because she wanted to get with me and I proceeded to tell her how fat she is and how repulsive it makes her look. YOU should really not waste this girls time if you feel the way you feel. You are already questioning her looks which is a warning sign now that it WILL become a problem in your relationship with this girl if it gets that far.

I don't care if this is dogpiling, this post deserves it

 

[Isotropy]

You joke, but the right plastic surgery can be life changing to people born with a deformity. It can give a confodence boost that radically alters a person's life trajectory and change how others treat them. Cleft palates are a prime example.

Not saying that this is any sort of answer to the OP's dilemma, of course. Plastic surgery should be a personal choice and always done to make the person themselves happy, not for the sake of anyone else.

Plastic surgery won't fix underlying self esteem issues either, so if you think you're ugly because you have a warped perception of yourself, it can be actively harmful.

Oh, of course - however I was suggesting that it is the OP's perception of this girl that may be warped, she certainly doesn't sound deformed in the slightest, and unless I have missed something, there hasn't been any suggestion that the girl has a problem with her own appearance.

 

[DBT85]

Yes attraction can grow. The only way for you to know for sure is to get to know the person more. Physical attraction is the very first thing that draws us to someone then from there we usually attempt to get to know the person to see if they are someone we can date.

For me, if I'm not at least partially attracted to the person physically then I will never ever date them. It doesn't matter how good of a person they are, if I don't think they are pretty then I will never want to date them. If they are really pretty and I find out they are very unintelligent then I drop them. I have no fat female friends and I have never and will never date a fat overweight girl either. If I ever get married and the wife starts to gain weight, I will give her a chance to lose it otherwise I am gone- this type of agreement will be in a contract the future wife will need to sign before marriage. I don't care how much I love the person she will get dropped for becoming fat. I've even made a fat girl cry because she wanted to get with me and I proceeded to tell her how fat she is and how repulsive it makes her look. YOU should really not waste this girls time if you feel the way you feel. You are already questioning her looks which is a warning sign now that it WILL become a problem in your relationship with this girl if it gets that far.

I don't even.

 

[kitchenmotors]

Blunt and a bit too harsh, but I agree

It's not a bit too harsh, it's being a complete and utter douche.

Glad you have no problem agreeing and being lumped in with someone like that. It's easy to weed out the people on here to ignore.

 

[Cepheus]

You joke, but the right plastic surgery can be life changing to people born with a deformity. It can give a confodence boost that radically alters a person's life trajectory and change how others treat them. Cleft palates are a prime example.

I can vouch for this. I'm thinking about fixing my nose soon. I have pretty bad self-esteem issues because of it and I feel that I'll feel much better about myself once it's fixed.

 

[T.O.P]

It's not a bit too harsh, it's being a complete and utter douche.

Glad you have no problem agreeing and being lumped in with someone like that. It's easy to weed out the people on here to ignore.

You are the one lumping me in with someone i said that i kinda agree with but okay

And again, i was on mobile, didn't care to underline the "I've even made a fat girl cry because she wanted to get with me and I proceeded to tell her how fat she is and how repulsive it makes her look." to wich obviously i don't agree with

But happy to help i guess? outside of that he ain't anything that doesn't go through someone's mind, holy as you can be

 

[Az987]

You can, at least if there's some attraction. Well from my experience at least. Here's what you do:

Get attracted to women being attracted to you.

For example, I get extremely turned on by turning someone on.

 

[mewmew42]

Where is the balance of meeting someone new vs dont even try because of bad attitude?

Does it mean if someone have bad attitude they shouldnt even bother meeting new people?

 

[Nesotenso]

Quite frankly I hate this situation. I feel like an absolute fool. I don't know what to do and I just have to hope things work out ... I don't know how that will happen but I hope it does.

I think I shouldn't respond to this thread anymore because I am so lost and confused.

I appreciate all your replies but I am in a humbling situation over which I feel completely lost. I could end up hurting people whatever route I take. We already started making arrangements for marriage and it's just a mess .....

Thanks for your replies all. I feel humbled and lost.

:'‑( :'‑( :'‑( :'‑( :'‑(

Having seen this with South Asian friends, the line of thinking is familiar to me. But I don't get it why it seems to most South Asian families that there is some deadline you have to meet. Is it because of age?
Anyway getting into a committed relationship when you don't feel it just seems like a recipe for disaster.

 

[Astral Dog]

Why not just be her Crazy friend?

 

[kitchenmotors]

You are the one lumping me in with someone i said that i kinda agree with but okay

And again, i was on mobile, didn't care to underline the "I've even made a fat girl cry because she wanted to get with me and I proceeded to tell her how fat she is and how repulsive it makes her look." to wich obviously i don't agree with

But happy to help i guess? outside of that he ain't anything that doesn't go through someone's mind, holy as you can be

Blunt and a bit too harsh, but I agree

Even if you're on mobile, you can specify, especially with a post as vile as his. You didn't say "kinda", you said you agree and stated his opinion was harsh and blunt.

I'm not perfect and I don't expect anyone else to be. The guys I've been with or have been interested in dating, not once has that gone through my mind. My ex gained a little weight because of work stress and I didn't think to dump him because of it. That's not normal behavior and points to some issues beyond your typical "I'm attracted or not attracted to ____" reasons.

 

[hodgy100]

Yes attraction can grow. The only way for you to know for sure is to get to know the person more. Physical attraction is the very first thing that draws us to someone then from there we usually attempt to get to know the person to see if they are someone we can date.

For me, if I'm not at least partially attracted to the person physically then I will never ever date them. It doesn't matter how good of a person they are, if I don't think they are pretty then I will never want to date them. If they are really pretty and I find out they are very unintelligent then I drop them. I have no fat female friends and I have never and will never date a fat overweight girl either. If I ever get married and the wife starts to gain weight, I will give her a chance to lose it otherwise I am gone- this type of agreement will be in a contract the future wife will need to sign before marriage. I don't care how much I love the person she will get dropped for becoming fat. I've even made a fat girl cry because she wanted to get with me and I proceeded to tell her how fat she is and how repulsive it makes her look. YOU should really not waste this girls time if you feel the way you feel. You are already questioning her looks which is a warning sign now that it WILL become a problem in your relationship with this girl if it gets that far.

this is a joke post right?
RIGHT?

 

[Ran rp]

pureplayin2 is just tellin' it like it is









christ

 

[Lemaitre]

You are the one lumping me in with someone i said that i kinda agree with but okay

And again, i was on mobile, didn't care to underline the "I've even made a fat girl cry because she wanted to get with me and I proceeded to tell her how fat she is and how repulsive it makes her look." to wich obviously i don't agree with

But happy to help i guess? outside of that he ain't anything that doesn't go through someone's mind, holy as you can be

You didn't say kinda.

Just "I agree".

 

[Lemaitre]

Yes attraction can grow. The only way for you to know for sure is to get to know the person more. Physical attraction is the very first thing that draws us to someone then from there we usually attempt to get to know the person to see if they are someone we can date.

For me, if I'm not at least partially attracted to the person physically then I will never ever date them. It doesn't matter how good of a person they are, if I don't think they are pretty then I will never want to date them. If they are really pretty and I find out they are very unintelligent then I drop them. I have no fat female friends and I have never and will never date a fat overweight girl either. If I ever get married and the wife starts to gain weight, I will give her a chance to lose it otherwise I am gone- this type of agreement will be in a contract the future wife will need to sign before marriage. I don't care how much I love the person she will get dropped for becoming fat. I've even made a fat girl cry because she wanted to get with me and I proceeded to tell her how fat she is and how repulsive it makes her look. YOU should really not waste this girls time if you feel the way you feel. You are already questioning her looks which is a warning sign now that it WILL become a problem in your relationship with this girl if it gets that far.

This has to be an alt.

New worst post ever for me on here.

 

[T.O.P]

Even if you're on mobile, you can specify, especially with a post as vile as his. You didn't say "kinda", you said you agree and stated his opinion was harsh and blunt.

I'm not perfect and I don't expect anyone else to be. The guys I've been with or have been interested in dating, not once has that gone through my mind. My ex gained a little weight because of work stress and I didn't think to dump him because of it. That's not normal behavior and points to some issues beyond your typical "I'm attracted or not attracted to ____" reasons.

I wouldn't dump my guy because of fat/stress induced problems off course, but if i'm with someone and after we get merried he/she just stops caring about looks and fitness (wich happens a lot), that could easily become a problem yes

And the exact same thing works for me, i like that my partner feels attracted to me and i sure as hell always try my best to keep up with that

You didn't say kinda.

Just "I agree".

Okay?

 

[Miles Quaritch]

Having seen this with South Asian friends, the line of thinking is familiar to me. But I don't get it why it seems to most South Asian families that there is some deadline you have to meet. Is it because of age?
Anyway getting into a committed relationship when you don't feel it just seems like a recipe for disaster.

Women are seen as having an 'expiration' date. I know this from when I used to date a Pakistani girl, she used to tell me all the time her aunties and mum would say she only had a few years left to find a good man and have heathy children.

She was 26 when we were dating. She got married 3 months later, it was an arranged marriage. Guy was from Pakistan.

 

[T.O.P]

We already started making arrangements for marriage and it's just a mess .....

I need to get through your post history in this thread, i didn't think it was THAT serious D:

 

[Replicant]

I don't think I can ever understand not having a choice in whom you married but considering the fact that:

* You have little ability to choose your partner
* She is in the same position
* Sex seems to be primarily a child-rearing method for both of you
* Your family seem to control a lot of your decision

I mean, considering all things, what else can you do? You either break out/extricate yourself of the awful situation COMPLETELY or you surrender to it and make your peace by maybe dedicating your life to your children. But this is a situation where you need to be decisive about what you want because it'll set a tone for the rest of your life.

 

[Silvard]

I wouldn't dump my guy because of fat/stress induced problems off course, but if i'm with someone and after we get merried he/she just stops caring about looks and fitness (wich happens a lot), that could easily become a problem yes

And the exact same thing works for me, i like that my partner feels attracted to me and i sure as hell always try my best to keep up with that



Okay?

Do you also keep a no-fat-friends policy?