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cognitive dissonance in porn consumption
- Thread starter WarLox
- Start date
Baron von Loathsome
Member
"As far back as I could remember, I always wanted to be a porn star."
Earthbound64
Banned
And back to incest we go.
Trickster
Member
I don't really see why. I mean I also enjoy watching movies with a lot of killing in them, and play games where I do a lot of killing. Doesn't mean I'd be standing in line to kill someone if the opportunity somehow ever presented itself.
It really just comes down to being able to seperate fantasy from reality
Finale Fireworker
Member
No. It's my business
Please log on to WholeLiottaLove.com for more. That's whole with a W.
Don't go to deviantart or /d/ lol.
I'm sure you've got a fetish or two I'd consider weird. (I don't have a nipple penetration fetish)
Earthbound64
Banned
Hey man, don't go shaming my Clothed porn fetish.
Maintenance
Member
I'm not there for the plot.
True Savior
Member
We're a weird bunch.
Baron von Loathsome
Member
I'd say it's at least worth the introspection, thinking about why you enjoy it.
How About No
Member
Kay now I regret contributing if it helped get us to this point
Vigilant Walrus
Member
I've heard the opposite. Many young men in particular seems unable to distinguish porn from sex.
We are on a VG site where we play games where we brutally murder millions of people, steal and assault random strangers, set up complicated murder fantasies where we deliberately and meticulously figure out ways to get to and murderlise the living daylights out of people.
We have stabbed, punched and garroted people, kicked peoples nuts out of their heads and all sorts of things.
I haven't killed anyone yet.
Fantasy vs reality
We have stabbed, punched and garroted people, kicked peoples nuts out of their heads and all sorts of things.
I haven't killed anyone yet.
Fantasy vs reality
Airola
Member
Take two hours to open 40 tabs of the absolute best collection of porn and erotica there has ever been anywhere in the history of everything.
Take 10 seconds to experience the most wonderful sense of mental and physical pleasure.
Take 5 seconds to close 40 tabs in disgust.
Time is relative, said Ron Jeremy.
Earthbound64
Banned
Hopefully they know when a dolphin's a dolphin, though.
jack_package_200
Banned
Just do what I do and watch stuff from Vixen or Passion/Pure Mature. Those sites don't get creepy.
Also dat tasteful lighting
Also dat tasteful lighting
Clockwork5
Member
I let my boner do the thinking for me.
Finale Fireworker
Member
This has been said many times in this thread and I absolutely understand why the equivalency is being made, but I don't think this is actually a sound comparison.
In your life, it is immensely unlikely you will ever murder another human being. But almost every living person on this planet will have sex. Media will probably never motivate you to do something you wouldn't already do, but it may still influence how you do it.
When I was a young man having sex for the first time, my only frame of reference for what having sex looked like was from porn. Even though I knew porn was fake and the scenarios and positions I saw weren't realistic, it was still the only context I had.
This is true for many young people, male and female alike. I'm not saying young people can't be discerning, no teen is going to try to replicate everything they see, but to believe the hard line between fantasy and reality is as strong here as it is with other media is incorrect.
I remember the first few times I had sex. I was extremely performative, trying to go at the "right pace" and make the "right noises" and use the "right moves." I thankfully realized pretty quickly how unnatural this was, but it took experience to overwrite my pornographic expectations.
Personally, I gave up on professionally shot, over-directed porn in my late teens.
I prefer amateur stuff; I like the reality of it. People recording themselves because it turns them on as opposed to actors/actresses doing to for money.
Also, fuck many aspects of the adult film industry in general.
Airola
Member
No way. I remember the days of my youth when all I needed to get off was to see a three second tit shot in Amityville 7. And even then the scenario and context meant a lot.
There should be something else in the context of a porn scene for it to really make wonders. Just the mere "Me man, you woman, we fuck" doesn't cut it. It's too given. Make them at least be in danger to get caught. Make some part of the world around the people mean something to the action.
I wonder how many people have open and honest conversations about porn with their friends?
I've had a conversation like that with a few buddies before but by the end, i was like...
Lol.
Meaning that you were faking your disgust because you noticed your kinks were way worse?
Ok, well..
"Nipple fuck"
-Dick in a nipple hole
-Nipple in vagina
-Nipple in urethra
-Fucking inverted nipple
Now, I've been a perv through my whole life but suddenly two words bring all kinds of different things in my mind that I had never even thought of.
I don't think comparing digital portrayals of people doing digitally programmed stuff to real people doing real things really works.
I don't think we can even really compare porn to other genres with real people. Sex is a hugely personal thing. The people in porn aren't merely just acting. They aren't pretending to have feelings and they aren't there to walk and run and jump and crouch or even having a simulated scene of intimacy. It's more personal than crying. It's more personal than laughing. If it hurts, it has a bigger effect to the person than, say, an action star hurting his knee or the actors feeling beaten after 12 hours of work.
They are there to stick a dick inside a pussy, a mouth, an ass (, a nipple hole) and where ever else you can stick it in. And if it's not dick, it's something else. Things are touching and rubbing the genitals of naked people. And this is made for everyone to see for the rest of the existence of the universe and people make it to get money.
It is very understandable to be worried about both the well being of the porn actors/actresses and how viewing such things might affect the viewer's psyche.
Even if there is the "fantasy" characteristic in porn, it's still not exactly the same as other things that can be labeled under that term.
Porn is definitely not just a trivial thing and not just one of different types of media and entertainment genres.
Jason's Ultimatum
Member
SirMossyBloke
Member
Welcome to the club of disgust.
It's never 100% legal for sure. Some of the thumbnails sre fucking disturbing and sometimes makes me hesitant to even use these sites.
Earthbound64
Banned
I've never actually seen "2 girls 1 cup" or any of the other sorts of things commonly mentioned - Lemonparty, Goats.ex, etc. despite having been on the internet for over 20 years.
I'm just mindful of what I click on, I guess,
& nipple porn
Moose Biscuits
It would be extreamly painful...
And drawn porn. Can't coerce a fictional character!
How about lolis and shota
you are not alone, bro
How About No
Member
Welcome to the club finally
I think we may still have some member welcome baskets in the back but the chocolates may be a little stale by now
Why?
I don't click for Oscar award-winning writing. I click based on how attractive I find the woman, and like I mentioned earlier in the thread, I mainly watch amateur content. It's just hotter to me.
Well, here's the thing. At least in my case, when I watch stuff like that, either this "houdini" stuff or instances regarding blackmail and such, the woman in question would be hesitant and very uncomfortable in the beginning, but midway through, they usually start to enjoy themselves or at worst, by the end they're more annoyed/irritated rather than feeling actually violated (these types usually end with a joke like the woman complaining more about the dude cumming on their shirt or dress or whatever and having to wash them than anything else).
Now, when you get into that shit with the woman crying while this is happening like in a lot of Japanese porn....yeah, that's no bueno.
Now, when you get into that shit with the woman crying while this is happening like in a lot of Japanese porn....yeah, that's no bueno.
I was going to say the same thing and you explained it wonderfully.
Comparing porn to violence in video games or movies is missing the point. Perhaps if you were planning to commit murder, you would emulate methods you've seen in media, because those ideas are in there. But the vast majority of people have no interest in actually hurting someone, so these ideas and thoughts are never acted on. In contrast, the vast majority of us have sex and, again, those ideas are in there. The idea that porn has no influence on behavior seems completely naive. We have generations of people learning about sex through porn, firstly, and then actual experience second.
Moose Biscuits
It would be extreamly painful...
That stuff is gross, but the point still stands. That stuff is actually illegal here already though.
Funyarinpa
Member
I'm a fucking degenerate (in my mind).
Oh well, I think it does come down to fantasy vs reality. Unless you're getting off on seeing porn where an actual person does appear to be getting violated, though, I don't think it says anything about your morality. I'm biased about this though, since the judgement I come to would affect how I evaluate myself greatly.
You have to take extra care to not let the ideas and motifs in such content pervade into your actual world view if you do consume such media, though.
Oh well, I think it does come down to fantasy vs reality. Unless you're getting off on seeing porn where an actual person does appear to be getting violated, though, I don't think it says anything about your morality. I'm biased about this though, since the judgement I come to would affect how I evaluate myself greatly.
You have to take extra care to not let the ideas and motifs in such content pervade into your actual world view if you do consume such media, though.
I usually prefer hentai for the twisted stugf since I don't have to worry if an actor's being exploited
Finale Fireworker
Member
In many cultures throughout much of human history, quite simply, they did not.
Sometimes people don't recognize the ledge until after they've fallen off, other times motherfuckers dive off that shit, hopefully with a bungee cord. The different ways people engage with taboo material or things that push their own boundaries is intriguing, but I think the critical part is being aware of those boundaries and being aware of the boundaries of others when it comes to real world interaction. Like, the example from the OP, that shit might be silly in porn, but they're actors that probably (hopefully) know that's going to happen. That is absolutely not some shit you do in real life without discussing with everyone involved.
This is a good point and we really gotta do better about talking to teens about sex.
I wish I could go back in time and unwatch that Cody Lane video
hodayathink
Member
While I agree with this, my general problem is two-fold. The first is that that is a problem with how we teach children/teens about sex, in this country and in the world, not a problem with porn industry in particular. We teach children that murder is bad, and we not only routinely punish murderers, we routinely talk about and show that we are and will punish murderers, so most people don't murder. We don't do the greatest job of teaching people that rape/sexual assault is bad (or what rape/sexual assault really is, and that's it isn't just jumping out of the bushes and grabbing women) and then on top of that don't do a great job of actually punishing people that do rape (and showing that we will do so), so that message doesn't take hold anywhere near as strongly. I don't really understand why the porn industry is supposed to pick up for society's shortcomings. My second, and probably more pressing, problem is that the porn that depicts the type of sex we would actually want people to be emulating does exist out there. And not in a small amount either. I mean, porn's resident serial asshole misogynist accused rapist (James Deen) starred in a ton of both education porn stuff and more intimate and tender type videos (i.e. X-Art and the like) in addition to the BDSM work that most people seem to immediately know him for. It's just that that stuff isn't what's popular/searched for on tube sites, so people like to pretend it doesn't exist (and this is me going on a pay-for-you-porn tangent, because I'm sick of people pretending like what's popular on tube sites is the only porn out there when porn industry is as varied as the movie industry is).
jokingbird
Member
Fine, violence in a revenge fashion. It follows the same logic. If you are perpetrating thought crimes through voyeurism. Violent games would fall to the same argument. If you can forgive one and not the other, then you are just being hypocritical.
I wouldn't be so sure about that
Also, rape/coercion/etc fantasies are also based on violence
Firstly, I don't disagree. Just because I encourage thinking critically about the way porn affects real life sexual relationships, doesn't mean I think we should be endeavoring to put an end to the industry. I do think people need to be more honest about this subject though. I bet that many of the people who insist it can't possibly have any effect on behavior, have emulated positions or sexual acts they've seen in porn, because why wouldn't they. Porn has lots of fun ideas.
I do think we need to work on limiting exposure to porn though, because kids are probably finding it, before they get any sex education. Or maybe we just need to go the opposite route and just say: "Listen, I know you're probably going to find it, but you need to know that certain depictions are not normal and illegal" and actually frame our discussions about consent in this context.
The problem is, it's easy to say consent is important, but how many teenagers have spent years watching videos like this:
This is the kind of thing an adult can easily separate from reality and even look at as being silly. But would a kid just learning about sex and finding videos online understand that? Or would they think rape is no big deal, because the victim will probably enjoy it and then go on to contribute to rape statistics on college campuses? I don't think porn is to blame for these ideas, but maybe it is perpetuating them to a younger generation that knows how to find this stuff.
I'm not saying put an end to porn. I'm saying maybe we need to consider these things and frame our discussions about consent around things teenagers are (probably) actually watching.
ghostwritingduck
Member
I don't think it's that simple. Just because someone may have a positive fantasy about being coerced into sex, doesn't meant they actually want to be raped in real life.
I think one of the big issues here though is that so many people don't understand that porn isn't real sex. I mean in fact, it technically IS real sex. But it is the full extent of it. It doesn't carry the weight of real sex, but so many people think that the sex they have should look like the porn they watch. It's on a level so far beyond fake violence on screen.
jokingbird
Member
Do you want regulation as the OP is suggesting? I don't get this line of thinking. There are dumb people everywhere, I am not sure we should shape our society around them not being able to tell fact from fiction.
hodayathink
Member
I'm all for limiting exposure to porn, especially to children. Most of the producers and performers I've known will tell you the same thing, and how much they feel uncomfortable when people that are clearly under 18 approach them as fans, or older ones tell them how they've been fans since their early teen years (bringing up James Deen again, there's an interview he did with Nightline when he first went mainstream where he talks about that). The issue is that in the tube site era, we really don't know how to do that. The biggest problem is that while porn sites generally put their full videos behind a paywall with a credit card needed to get past it, tube sites don't. I'd bet that the vast majority of teen and pre-teen porn consumption nowadays comes from tube sites, and are videos that are actual copyright infringing and should be taken down. Now there are companies that try to fight this, but the problem is that the tube site companies have become large enough that they're taking over the whole industry outright, paid and non-paid (the largest porn production company in North America, and probably the world, started off with one popular membership site [Brazzers] and about 2-3 popular tube sites [Redtube, Youporn, Pornhub] and proceeded to buy up nearly everything that they could get their hands on, tube and paid). I'd love to go back to before the tube site era, but that genie is out of the bottle and we're not getting it back in without some really restrictive changes to the DMCA and copyright law. And even then we'd have to deal with sites offering trailers and free previews to let customers know what they're buying (but that's a much easier issue to solve, comparatively speaking).
always crazy bacon
Banned
Having grown up before internet porn I can tell you that is kids want porn they'll find a way to get it.
Amibguous Cad
Member
So the vast majority of people have no interest in actually hurting someone, which means that they have no interest in houdiniing or sexually assaulting or raping someone. They can recognize when something actually hurts someone (this rape comic is kind of hot, but I'd be horrified if I ever did it in real life, much like a gamer's reaction to Call of Duty), and when it doesn't.
Sure, all people have sex. But all people have a chance to perpetrate violence, too. Lots of people laughed when they swerved out of traffic in GTA to hit a bunch of pedestrians, and very few of them are doing so in real life.
If people don't want to hurt someone else, then they don't act on the desires that inherently involve hurting people, and do act on other ones, so the worst case scenario here is that someone decides that feet are alright and ask their partner to indulge.
Or they run off to the BDSM community and learn how to get their rocks off in a safe, sane, and consensual way.