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Conan the Barbarian Teaser - Dear God Why

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After Momo's performance in GoT, I'm willing to give the movie a benefit of the doubt. Even though the trailer looks... crappy.
 
Splatt said:
After Momo's performance in GoT, I'm willing to give the movie a benefit of the doubt. Even though the trailer looks... crappy.

Honestly, I think the trailer looks fine ...it's when the butt-rock kicks in that I groan =/

...that and Nispel, while having a good eye, hasn't made a single legitimately good film
 
I liked Pathfinder, so I think he'll be fine with this. I really doubt they're going to have the rock music in the movie. It's probably just for dudebro marketing. Everything about the film looks like they're doing the right things, despite people clamoring for the uncharismatic return of Arnold. And I say that as someone who lived Conan the Barbarian.
 
Red Band trailer looks great!
I'm definately willing to give this a try..even if just cuz they're willing to go fullout R for a change.
 
Marcus Nispel deserves to be blacklisted from hollywood. That untalented asshole is creating nothing but medicore and bad movies with way too much money.
Total creative bankruptcy.
Also the new conan movie looks like fucking Xena, which does not fit the scenario at all.
Just from a desing perspective it's so fucking dumb.
In the john milius movie (still one of the best movies of all time) the armor and set design was so fucking awesome and believeable and rooted in ancient history. From Teutonic-Celtic armors to mongolian ones. It's not spelled out but you can tell lots of thought went into armor and set design to reflect the respective cultures.
Everything in the new conan movie screams "cultureless fantasy bullshit". It's such a fucking disgrace.

I won't even talk about dialog and characters here, because the original movie got over so much emotions just with soundtrack and subtle acting and minimal dialog, without much exposition.
 
Some of the imagery looks good, but so much shitty looking hollywood action (what the fuck is with films and that stupid flying side punch), and awful CG
 
Ahoi-Brause said:
Marcus Nispel deserves to be blacklisted from hollywood. That untalented asshole is creating nothing but medicore and bad movies with way too much money.
Total creative bankruptcy.
Also the new conan movie looks like fucking Xena, which does not fit the scenario at all.
Just from a desing perspective it's so fucking dumb.
In the john milius movie (still one of the best movies of all time) the armor and set design was so fucking awesome and believeable and rooted in ancient history. From Teutonic-Celtic armors to mongolian ones. It's not spelled out but you can tell lots of thought went into armor and set design to reflect the respective cultures.
Everything in the new conan movie screams "cultureless fantasy bullshit". It's such a fucking disgrace.

I won't even talk about dialog and characters here, because the original movie got over so much emotions just with soundtrack and subtle acting and minimal dialog, without much exposition.

Well, Nispel didn't actually WRITE any of the movies he's directed I believe. Maybe he's just been needing some good material..
 
bloodydrake said:
Red Band trailer looks great!
I'm definately willing to give this a try..even if just cuz they're willing to go fullout R for a change.

Pleasantly surprised to see this be R rated, the red band trailer got me a little excited. Was expecting some cut-up PG13 trash based off that first trailer.
 
AgentOtaku said:
Well, Nispel didn't actually WRITE any of the movies he's directed I believe. Maybe he's just been needing some good material..
A good director can turn the biggest POS script in something remotely watchable but Nispel is just the most uncreative and bland director out there. He's the definition of a hollywood-whore who does everything if the price is right.

TCM was a disgrace, Friday 13th was a disgrace and pathfinder was boring and mostly lame (I sympathised with the vikings way more than with that asshat from the DOOM movie), the worst thing is this conan reboot now. It's just such a corporate, target-audience clusterfuck.
 
Ahoi-Brause said:
A good director can turn the biggest POS script in something remotely watchable but Nispel is just the most uncreative and bland director out there. He's the definition of a hollywood-whore who does everything if the price is right.

TCM was a disgrace, Friday 13th was a disgrace and pathfinder was boring and mostly lame (I sympathised with the vikings way more than with that asshat from the DOOM movie), the worst thing is this conan reboot now. It's just such a corporate, target-audience clusterfuck.

Well, consider this his last chance then
 
JdFoX187 said:
I liked Pathfinder, so I think he'll be fine with this. I really doubt they're going to have the rock music in the movie. It's probably just for dudebro marketing. Everything about the film looks like they're doing the right things, despite people clamoring for the uncharismatic return of Arnold. And I say that as someone who lived Conan the Barbarian.
s-ARSENIO-large.jpg
 
Ahoi-Brause said:
and pathfinder was boring and mostly lame (I sympathised with the vikings way more than with that asshat from the DOOM movie), the worst thing is this conan reboot now. It's just such a corporate, target-audience clusterfuck.

out of all of Karl Urban's awesome roles the one you use for an example is fucking DOOM? Really????

Get outta 'eaaaaaaaaaa!
 
Pathfinder was hillarious. Vikings show up, and fuck up a village for no gain. They chase after native americans in a long journey... why? Because they want to fuck their shit up. The vikings lost many lives simply in the pursuit of knocking over baskets of berries.
 
soundscream said:
Had a few good action scenes here and there and some nice visuals. Nothing terrible about it. Wouldn't say it's great, but not the pile of shit that much of GAF makes it, and most other movies out to be.

BattleMonkey said:
Pathfinder was hillarious. Vikings show up, and fuck up a village for no gain. They chase after native americans in a long journey... why? Because they want to fuck their shit up. The vikings lost many lives simply in the pursuit of knocking over baskets of berries.
Nothing to do with Nispel. That's all from the graphic novel the movie was based off.
 
Ahoi-Brause said:
I find it to be puzzeling how people could like that red band trailer with the TERRIBLE generic buttrock, the generic oneliners and the actors putting in zero effort and everything looking like a kevin sorbo movie.

Here have something good to wash your eyes and ears clean:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ypAAsmgVmhk
A gray box with a message that the content is blocked is good?

Momoa has proven with Game of Thrones that he can be a damn fine actor in these types of roles. The rock music is terrible, but everything that I've read about the movie from the script to the way they're handling Conan closer to the book than the bastardized Arnold version gives me hope. Conan the Barbarian was a classic film, but it was not a Conan film.
 
JdFoX187 said:
A gray box with a message that the content is blocked is good?
Not over here in germany, that's a first.
JdFoX187 said:
Momoa has proven with Game of Thrones that he can be a damn fine actor in these types of roles. The rock music is terrible, but everything that I've read about the movie from the script to the way they're handling Conan closer to the book than the bastardized Arnold version gives me hope. Conan the Barbarian was a classic film, but it was not a Conan film.
The Milius movie still is one of the best movies of all time.
And who cares if Momoa can act? The Rock can also act, yet he's no conan.
If you got hopes for this project I can't really help you, enjoy your summer blockbuster actionride that will leave you sitting in the cinema feeling dirty for having supported such a piece of shit director like Nispel.
 
JdFoX187 said:
Momoa has proven with Game of Thrones that he can be a damn fine actor in these types of roles. The rock music is terrible, but everything that I've read about the movie from the script to the way they're handling Conan closer to the book than the bastardized Arnold version gives me hope. Conan the Barbarian was a classic film, but it was not a Conan film.

Don't really see this, and the original Conan movie was just a cut and paste job of different parts of multiple Conan short stories outside of the origin stuff, which even the original short stories never went into much. They also took elements from the early comics. Visually Arnold was different, but other than that the movie was pretty spot on.

The one liner stuff in this new Conan is also pretty out of character, but hopefully it's just trailer nonsense.
 
BattleMonkey said:
? Conan has fought many fantasy like creatures, faced ghosts, magic, etc many times before.

The shitty music during the trailer is Hollywood Undead.

Being rated R is cool and all but the movie still looks awful.
 
ryutaro's mama said:
Why not just re-release the original next year for the 30 year anniversary?

I don't get it.

Because some of us would like to see an actual Conan movie, rather than a vehicle for a steroid riddled Ahnold that largely ignores the canon.
 
besada said:
Because some of us would like to see an actual Conan movie, rather than a vehicle for a steroid riddled Ahnold that largely ignores the canon.

This is HYBORIA.

Ahnulds is CINO: Conan in name only.
 
Saw this movie today. Was pleasently surprised. While the movie is no masterpeace and the 3D is horrible, it didn't deserve to bomb this hard.

It had a very old school feeling to it. Very nice fight scenes whithout (excessive) shaky cam.
 
Saw it last weekend, was a fun movie, but it kinda drags on later on and really it's pretty forgettable though. Nothing memorable and the soundtrack sucked. Was entertaining and had lot of ass kicking and titties
 
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