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Fifty Shades of Grey random sentence generator (Hilarity guaranteed)

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T

Thorgal

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http://www.fiftyshadesgenerator.com/

thank you Zeppu for the link and help make this one of the funniest threads on GAF

Simply press the generate button and post the result here.

Me first:



“The feeling of his steamin' semen slobbering down my throat got my tuna tunnel tears flowing quicker than greased shit off a shiny shovel. I awoke the next morning with my hot pocket still flowing. I thought it was over but his greasy slimelight had other ideas. The slamming makes me gush my clunge gunge all over his one-eyed milkman. Within no time, I could feel the shitty cock snot trickling from my shit winker and all over my vertical garden. If I don't strum the banjo to get my tuna tunnel tears haemorrhaging from my ground zero grotto, his one-eyed milkman is going to leave my furburger resembling a rabid baboon's arse.
 
"Once in a blue moon a clan of fine impostors and eight gangling hecks mortally seduced the patchy crone with chisels."
 
poet.png


Rarely a congregation of smelly bouncers and eleven wrong ibexes warmly transfixed the kind redneck with ratchets.
 
I much prefer this one: http://www.fiftyshadesgenerator.com/

It was bliss having his sperminator shoved inside me again; stuffing my smush mitten with a number of chillies just didn't get my shame portal squirting like it used to. There was cock custard frothing from his slut slayer and I was wetter than an otter's pocket. We were ready for more. By now, my chlamydia canal was haemorrhaging like a George Foreman grill. Leaving my panties sunny side up on the floor was the least of my worries as his batter blaster rammed deeper into my Oxo orifice. Inserting a 10 inch purple battery-operated monster into my split peach got me surging sex wee faster than snot off a whip.
Click to expand...
 
Every morning a group of dirty pugs and two fat professors carefully shaved the little piglet with axes.
 
Every Saturday a band of scabby louts and five voiceless varmints hard dressed the nutritious alpaca with pokers
 
Once in a while a bevy of amiable spitzes and four high bakers rudely spiked the zaftig butch with putty knives.

Today I learned what zaftig means. But seriously. Wut.
 
I...I don't know what to think:
Time after time a dray of boiling scums and eleven modest suckers quickly ransacked the portly liar with chalks
Click to expand...

What's a dray?
WTF is a boiling scum? Am I to take the definition of scum literally? If so, that's just gross...
What would a fat liar be doing wiht chalk?

What is this sorcery???
 
Zeppu said:
I much prefer this one: http://www.fiftyshadesgenerator.com/
Click to expand...

Hahahahaha!

After having my cod canyon hammered, he then proceeded to thrust my poop chute. I can't wait to chow down on the steamin' semen from his gristle missile. By now, my wunder down under was leaking like Augustus Gloop at Willy Wonka's chocolate river. The unrelenting orgasms from his veiny quim prod pounding my gaping clam cavern made me come so hard, I began sweating like a dyslexic on Countdown. The plowing makes me spray my pussy batter all over his battering ram.
Click to expand...

That's just weiiiiiiiiiiiird.
 
"Every Tuesday a band of bland kinkajous and two upset sharpers fondly plodded after the punctual wizard with pokers."

Sounds like something straight out of Ni No Kuni.
 
jet1911 said:
After having my cod canyon hammered, he then proceeded to thrust my poop chute. I can't wait to chow down on the steamin' semen from his gristle missile. By now, my wunder down under was leaking like Augustus Gloop at Willy Wonka's chocolate river. The unrelenting orgasms from his veiny quim prod pounding my gaping clam cavern made me come so hard, I began sweating like a dyslexic on Countdown. The plowing makes me spray my pussy batter all over his battering ram.
Click to expand...
Holy crap, that's amazing! I should change my username to gristle missile!




Addnan said:
Every morning a group of dirty pugs and two fat professors carefully shaved the little piglet with axes.
Click to expand...

SquiddyCracker said:
Every morning a group of dirty pugs and two fat professors carefully shaved the little piglet with axes.
Click to expand...

wait a minute... this generator hardly seems random..
 
Leaving my panties sunny side up on the floor was the least of my worries as his spunk-filled spam rocket shoved deeper into my Mavis Fritter. With my lunchmeat now much like Pete Burns' lips, he thought it was time to start shoving my turd-herder. Is now the time to tell him I really need to extrude a toilet twinkie, I wondered? Hours of raiding like this would leave any girl's purple cabbage looking like the south end of a badger going north, and I was no different! It was bliss having his cunt plunger slid inside me again; stuffing my hatchet wound with an egg timer just didn't get my whispering eye splurging like it used to. The unrelenting orgasms from his vein cane fucking my stench trench made me come so hard, I began sweating like a gypsy near an unlocked shipping container.

Man, turd-herder and toilet twinkie. Man.
KuGsj.gif
 
“Within no time, I could feel the shitty steamin' semen weeping from my fart valve and all over my roast beef platter. If I don't stimulate the genitals through phalangetic motion to get my vertical moisture leaking from my gaping clam cavern, his Nelson's Column is going to leave my vertical garden resembling John Wayne's saddlebags. The feeling of his cock custard sliming down my throat got my minge monsoon flowing quicker than greased shit off a shiny shovel. He munched on my panty hamster, even though I'd been up on bricks for the best part of a week. He pinched off a giant toilet twinkie on my love bubbles just so he could devour it up like a pig at a trough.

Oh damn hahaha
 
"Hours of pounding like this would leave any girl's purple cabbage looking like a bulldog in a windtunnel, and I was no different!"






boutdown said:
If I don't play the clitar to get my fallopian fish stock leaking from my gaping clam cavern, his meaty member is going to leave my meaty hangers resembling a motorway pileup. Some girls are happy just to dial the rotary phone when they're alone, but I can't get off without having a number of chillies in my spunk dungeon and a barbie doll up my fudge factory. With my clap flaps now much like a horse's collar, he thought it was time to start ramming my turd-herder. Is now the time to tell him I really need to cop a stink pickle, I wondered? The feeling of his gentleman's relish dribbling down my throat got my spaff flowing quicker than greased shit off a shiny shovel. The unrelenting orgasms from his tenderloin truncheon slamming my chamber of squelch made me come so hard, I began sweating like a fat slag in a disco.
Click to expand...
Half of that could have been straight out of a Tarantino monologue.
 
If I don't play the clitar to get my fallopian fish stock leaking from my gaping clam cavern, his meaty member is going to leave my meaty hangers resembling a motorway pileup. Some girls are happy just to dial the rotary phone when they're alone, but I can't get off without having a number of chillies in my spunk dungeon and a barbie doll up my fudge factory. With my clap flaps now much like a horse's collar, he thought it was time to start ramming my turd-herder. Is now the time to tell him I really need to cop a stink pickle, I wondered? The feeling of his gentleman's relish dribbling down my throat got my spaff flowing quicker than greased shit off a shiny shovel. The unrelenting orgasms from his tenderloin truncheon slamming my chamber of squelch made me come so hard, I began sweating like a fat slag in a disco.
 
“Inserting a 9-iron into my shamevelope got me spraying sex wee faster than snot off a whip. I awoke the next morning with my oyster ditch still oozing. I thought it was over but his purple beaver buster had other ideas. The unrelenting orgasms from his pink tractor beam pounding my moose knuckle made me come so hard, I began sweating like a dyslexic on Countdown. There was man fat haemorrhaging from his chubstep and I was wetter than an English summer. We were ready for more. Some girls are happy just to audition the finger puppets when they're alone, but I can't get off without having an antique doorknob in my stench trench and my fist up my brown mile.”
 
The unrelenting orgasms from his washington monument fucking my cod canyon made me come so hard, I began sweating like a white mouse in a tampon factory. Some girls are happy just to finger blast when they're alone, but I can't get off without having an antique doorknob in my shame portal and a barbie doll up my soft tight anus. Leaving my panties sunny side up on the floor was the least of my worries as his purple beaver buster plunged deeper into my puckered brown eye. By now, my kipper dinghy was weeping like a slug in a salt mine. With his spunk-filled spam rocket fucking deep into my vaginal bacon buffet, the sensation of his womb ferret smashing my cervix made me quiver like Micheal J. Fox licking a car battery.
 
“He dropped a giant sewer trout on my chest puppies just so he could gobble it up like a bulldog eating porridge. The mixture of Mr. Hanky and man fat in my poo pipe created the delicious porthole pudding that he was so fond of. The unrelenting orgasms from his bugger king hammering my whispering eye made me come so hard, I began sweating like a white mouse in a tampon factory. I can't wait to consume the love piss from his chubstep. The seemingly never-ending streams of ectoplasm emanating from his Vince cable soon had me coated like a plasterer's radio.
Click to expand...

hmm
 
"My mouth was so full of huge penis and cock snot, the cock snot was weeping down my chin and onto my superdroopers. The mixture of colon cobra and Da Vinci load in my rusty bullet hole created the delicious rectoplasm that he was so fond of. The fucking of my tradesman's entrance was so vigorous, he soon found his kids on a swing joining his mutton dagger deep in my chocolate starfish. He dropped a giant corn-eyed butt snake on my chest puppies just so he could suck it up like a hungry hungry hippo. With his sperminator raiding deep into my cod crater, the sensation of his cumtree smashing my cervix made me quake like Muhammad Ali on a tumble dryer."

What the fuck is this shit.
 
The unrelenting orgasms from his ramrod thrusting my stench trench made me come so hard, I began sweating like a white mouse in a tampon factory. The pounding makes me squirt my minge monsoon all over his spunk-filled spam rocket. Some girls are happy just to stimulate the genitals through phalangetic motion when they're alone, but I can't get off without having a 10 inch purple battery-operated monster in my chamber of squelch and a gerbil up my marmite motorway. If I don't study english cliterature to get my fallopian fish stock dripping from my gammon alley, his womb raider is going to leave my spam castanets resembling Pete Burns' lips. After having my whispering eye fucked, he then proceeded to hammer my poop chute.
Click to expand...

Also, kinda old.
 
“The pounding of my chocolate starfish was so vigorous, he soon found his love spuds joining his mutton dagger deep in my fudge factory. The plowing makes me spray my minge monsoon all over his spam javelin. There was Da Vinci load foaming from his eight inches of throbbing pink jesus and I was wetter than a bathmaid's elbow. We were ready for more. The unrelenting orgasms from his gristle missile thrusting my shame portal made me come so hard, I began sweating like a gypsy near an unlocked shipping container. The feeling of his magician's wax foaming down my throat got my fallopian fish stock flowing quicker than greased shit off a shiny shovel."

I came
 
Gonna give this thread a bump .

Also here is another one .

“The unrelenting orgasms from his slut slayer raiding my tuna canal made me come so hard, I began sweating like a blind lesbian in a fish shop. Leaving my panties sunny side up on the floor was the least of my worries as his cunt stretcher plunged deeper into my puckered brown eye. The thrusting of my marmite motorway was so vigorous, he soon found his man marbles joining his wensleydale wand deep in my shit winker. My pink velvet sausage wallet was trembling like Vanessa Feltz's diesel-powered vibrator. He munched on my open-faced ham sandwich, even though I'd had Aunt Flo visiting for the best part of a week.
 
The mixture of sewer trout and gentleman's relish in my poo pipe created the delicious rectal stew that he was so fond of. Hours of plowing like this would leave any girl's flappy meal looking like a hippo's yawn, and I was no different! Some girls are happy just to finger blast when they're alone, but I can't get off without having a 15" spiked vibrator in my Quimcy, M.E. and a number of chillies up my old dirt road. After having my fuck trench slammed, he then proceeded to hammer my puckered brown eye. If I don't dial the rotary phone to get my tuna tunnel tears foaming from my enchilada of love, his vein cane is going to leave my panty hamster resembling badly battered road kill.
Click to expand...

Eww.
 
He munched on my beef curtains, even though I'd been walking the red carpet for the best part of a week. My stench trench was trembling like a rat on acid. When he removed his sperminator from my shit winker, he was pleasantly surprised to see a hardened fudge nugget staring back as him. He knew I couldn't wait to lap the sewer trout off his muffbuster. By now, my herring hole was draining like Augustus Gloop at Willy Wonka's chocolate river. Hours of raiding like this would leave any girl's beef curtains looking like Pete Burns' lips, and I was no different!

...
 
By now, my meat purse was foaming like Augustus Gloop at Willy Wonka's chocolate river. Hours of raiding like this would leave any girl's panty hamster looking like a bucket of smashed crabs, and I was no different! He munched on my vertical smile, even though I'd had my redwings for the best part of a week. There was penis pudding trickling from his bald-headed yogurt slinger and I was wetter than an Italian cruise ship. We were ready for more. Inserting a number of chillies into my tuna canal got me spattering clunge gunge faster than snot off a whip.

True story.
 
If I don't finger blast to get my shrimp sap frothing from my hot pocket, his spunk-filled spam rocket is going to leave my meaty hangers resembling a shot cat. Some girls are happy just to tune the tuna when they're alone, but I can't get off without having a 15" spiked vibrator in my bearded haddock pasty and a gerbil up my rusty sherif's badge. The unrelenting orgasms from his batter blaster pounding my hot pocket made me come so hard, I began sweating like a white mouse in a tampon factory. The slamming makes me spritz my fallopian fish stock all over his eight inches of throbbing pink jesus. After having my cod crater fucked, he then proceeded to pound my puckered brown eye.
 
"By now, my depravity cavity was slobbering like Augustus Gloop at Willy Wonka's chocolate river. The slamming of my chocolate starfish was so vigorous, he soon found his sperm factories joining his balony pony deep in my rusty sherif's badge. Now, I've seen more pricks than a second hand dartboard, but the sight of his jebend made my minge mucus slime like a jizz waterfall. My gashtray was trembling like jelly. Inserting an antique doorknob into my enchilada of love got me spouting spaff faster than a greased weasel shit."
Click to expand...

Is the real book written like this? Also, loving the expressions "depravity cavity" and "chocolate starfish".
 
“Hours of fucking like this would leave any girl's lunchmeat looking like a werewolf with it's throat cut, and I was no different! There was gentleman's relish oozing from his cunt stretcher and I was wetter than an otter's pocket. We were ready for more. The seemingly never-ending streams of gentleman's relish emanating from his stilton sword soon had me coated like a plasterer's radio. Inserting a squash into my enchilada of love got me flowing flange custard faster than snot off a whip. The unrelenting orgasms from his chorizo howitzer hammering my chlamydia canal made me come so hard, I began sweating like a gypsy near an unlocked shipping container.”
 
My meat purse was trembling like jelly. If I don't get a stinky pinky to get my beige slime leaching from my penis pothole, his greasy kebab skewer is going to leave my furburger resembling a stuntman's knee. By now, my depravity cavity was flowing like someone had poured fairy liquid into Niagara Falls. Hours of slamming like this would leave any girl's velcro triangle looking like a darts team's goalkeeper, and I was no different! Within no time, I could feel the shitty penis pudding seeping from my puckered brown eye and all over my panty hamster.
 
If I don't tune the tuna to get my tuna tunnel tears frothing from my kipper dinghy, his wrist-thick wand is going to leave my spam castanets resembling a bucket of smashed crabs. Some girls are happy just to fish for pearls when they're alone, but I can't get off without having an antique doorknob in my clam-flavoured pothole and a 10 inch purple battery-operated monster up my soft tight anus. The mixture of corn-eyed butt snake and love mayonnaise in my marmite motorway created the delicious porthole pudding that he was so fond of. Hours of plowing like this would leave any girl's purple cabbage looking like a ripped out fireplace, and I was no different! By now, my
Code: 
pink velvet sausage wallet
was seeping like Wayne Rooney's dick in an OAP home.
 
There was magician's wax foaming from his Ccean's 11 Inches and I was wetter than an otter's pocket. We were ready for more. Some girls are happy just to strum the banjo when they're alone, but I can't get off without having a barbie doll in my fuck trench and a lightbulb up my vintage golf bag. Now, I've taken more poundings than the Somme, but the sight of his chorizo howitzer made my tuna tunnel tears dribble like Adele waiting for Greggs to open. When he removed his front bum from my soft tight anus, he was pleasantly surprised to see a Mr. Hanky staring back as him. He knew I couldn't wait to suck the corn-eyed butt snake off his greasy kebab skewer. If I don't flick the bean to get my minge monsoon leaking from my chlamydia canal, his batter blaster is going to leave my velcro triangle resembling a badly wrapped kebab.
 
I can't wait to suck the penis pudding from his bald-headed yogurt slinger. By now, my tuna canal was foaming like a broken fridge freezer. After having my kipper dinghy fucked, he then proceeded to fuck my old dirt road. My wizards sleeve was trembling like a tasered slab of chopped liver. The mixture of butt nugget and magician's wax in my fart valve created the delicious porthole pudding that he was so fond of.
Click to expand...

'kay.
 
"Hours of fucking like this would leave any girl's vertical garden looking like a blind cobbler's thumb"

Da fuck indeed gaf
 
I can't wait to chow down on the penis pudding from his skin flute. After having my vibration station slammed, he then proceeded to slam my ring piece. My hot pocket was trembling like Micheal J. Fox licking a car battery. The unrelenting orgasms from his skin flute plowing my Quimcy, M.E. made me come so hard, I began sweating like a white mouse in a tampon factory. The fucking makes me splurge my sex wee all over his tenderloin truncheon.
Click to expand...

What
 
When he removed his ample cock from my fart valve, he was pleasantly surprised to see a colon cobra staring back at him. He knew I couldn't wait to lap the butt nugget off his throbbing quim dagger. Now, I've had more hands up me than The Muppets, but the sight of his burger king made my tuna tunnel slime like a leaky tap. He cut a giant butt nugget on my cans just so he could suck it up like a pig at a trough. The hammering of my black hole was so vigorous, he soon found his scroto baggins joining his tenderloin truncheon deep in my mud flap. Inserting a 10 inch purple battery-operated monster into my meat purse got me splurging spaff faster than snot off a whip.


cdlj0cj9dsli.jpg
 
With my spam castanets now much like a bulldog in a windtunnel, he thought it was time to start stuffing my brown mile. Is now the time to tell him I really need to arc a hardened fudge nugget, I wondered? It was bliss having his pink tractor beam shoved inside me again; stuffing my bearded haddock pasty with a 9-iron just didn't get my quim splurging like it used to. Now, I've taken more poundings than the Somme, but the sight of his slut slayer made my shrimp sap slobber like there was a midget inside me with a super soaker. The seemingly never-ending streams of gentleman's relish emanating from his cheese-crusted cock soon had me coated like a plasterer's radio. The unrelenting orgasms from his chubstep slamming my tuna canal made me come so hard, I began sweating like a gypsy near an unlocked shipping container.
”
 
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