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Following a breakup do you throw out gifts from your ex?

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NoblesseOblige

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So I was speaking with somebody tonight who is going through a breakup and they mentioned how they were disposing of items that their now ex had gifted them during the relationship. This registered as really strange to me because it's not something I've ever even considered doing following a separation. Granted all my relationships have ended amicably and we continued to be friends at best, or at worst just agreed to go on our different paths, usually due to one of us moving. Yet I feel even if it were a disastrous breakup I wouldn't really throw anything out. I guess maybe I just don't attach much sentimental value to things. Like once something is gifted to me it just becomes a thing I own more than a thing given to me.

How about the rest of GAF? Do you toss out things from your ex, or do you keep them? Are the memories too painful when you see a gift from an ex?
 
Nope. It all happened, and it's nice to have mementos that remind you that once upon a time somebody loved you.

Then again I haven't had a breakup where I want the other person dead or anything.
 
Incredibly sentimental gifts, sure. Or at least hidden deeply away where I'll never see them for awhile. But typical gifts like games or movies? Hell no, I like my shit.
 
Nah I always kept stuff. A girlfriend in high school got me a really nice pocket knife with my name engraved on it. It was a really nasty breakup. 18+ years later I still have it. Like you I don't really attach sentimental value to it, and other stuff, like cards, I never hang onto for more than a couple of days (at least this used to be the case, I keep every little thing my daughter makes for me).

It's enough of a thing though that it's a common trope in romance films and on sitcoms to get all that stuff together and burn it, so I assume some people must do it.
 
I'm not in the habit of keeping mementos, it's not just a romantic thing, I feel like it's burdensome keeping things around that remind me of the past. So if they're that kind of gift then yeah I'm getting rid of them.
 
Nah. At worst, my first ex made a painting for me that I no longer wanted hanging up after the breakup, so I tossed it in a box somewhere ten years ago. Something like that is very sentimental as opposed to a store bought gift, so I didn't want to get emotional over the breakup by keeping it around.

Inferno313 said:
Incredibly sentimental gifts, sure. Or at least hidden deeply away where I'll never see them for awhile. But typical gifts like games or movies? Hell no, I like my shit.
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My thoughts exactly.
 
I would rather they (including me) throw them out rather than open my door one day to see a pile of crap outside of it.

When that happens, I keep all the practical items like cookware, movies, games, books, etc. and just toss out the junk like pictures. I do keep the picture frames though if they can be salvaged.
 
I did, yes. I've ever only had one breakup, but I had to kind of forget he existed to get over it. I destroyed stuff like cards, all photos, small gifts. Kept that 500gb hd though!
 
an ex gave me a print of hers and i framed and hanged it just before she broke up with me. didn't take it down, but i thought about it. i like the piece, and don't feel it has any baggage associated with it. i separated her art from herself as a person.
 
I threw out everything after the breakup and gave away some of the better items (watches, etc.) to friends. Everyone is different, but I needed that kind of closure to move on.
 
B4s5C said:
When that happens, I keep all the practical items like cookware, movies, games, books, etc. [...]
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These, along with clothes, are mostly what I'm thinking of when saying gifts. Photos I'd get rid of because they have no practical use. And for certain types of photos it's only respectful to get rid of them. Though in this day and age that's all digital and requires a delete command more than throwing out.
 
I don't understand this at all. I also wouldn't erase or throw out old pictures like some people do. It's part of my own story and I'm not gonna go around pretending that it never happened.
 
Eh, I kept most the gifts she gave me. They're either stuff like a DVD set of a show I like, books, that sorta thing.

If it was something I really didn't care for, I'd probably throw it out or donate it if its useful for someone else.

I wonder what she did with the dresser I left with her.
 
I almost did. My ex quilted me an awesome Zelda blanket, painted me 3 awesome gaming related pictures, and framed me an awesome perler bead Mario picture that is framed. But I know I love her and how much work she put into that stuff, for me. If she cheated on me it would be one thing, but I kept making the same mistakes which caused the breakup, so I don't see the need to throw them out
 
Throwing everything out just seems spiteful, petty, juvenile, and short-sighted. Didn't your ex ever buy you anything that was nice, expensive, and useful? Can't you disassociate those objects from the memory of your ex?

If your ex bought you a really nice shaving razor and now you think of him/her every time you shave and that makes you sad.....then throw it out, yes. But at least for me, whenever I use something an ex bought, I don't really think of that person at all.
 
supernormal said:
I don't understand this at all. I also wouldn't erase or throw out old pictures like some people do. It's part of my own story and I'm not gonna go around pretending that it never happened.
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I'm not the type who preserves memories of places or events through photo. So typically the only ones I ever have are those of a more adult or private nature. So to me It's only respectful for me to delete those photos.
 
My first, I threw out everything but one thing. It was a framed Print of Boulevard of Broken Dreams. When I moved out with my eventual wife, it was shattered. She felt so bad about it. I took it as a sign.

Now year later I really wish I kept those memories I threw away.

Young is dumb no matter how smart you think you are.
 
NoblesseOblige said:
I'm not the type who preserves memories of places or events through photo. So typically the only ones I ever have are those of a more adult or private nature. So to me It's only respectful for me to delete those photos.
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I meant more like people who just alter their whole timeline on social media or whatever. In my case I don't erase pictures that I'm in because of a person that's not in my life or because of a situation that has changed. Those are all moments that have shaped my life, and with me being a photographer, I do value pictures very much as important resources to that story.
 
depends.
a gift that was a memento of some sort will get trashed.
a gift that was just there to be usefull, still has its place. (mabey if it was a bed or some shit that would make me remember her will also get trashed)
 
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