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Girl/Dating Age: Where to begin?

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GatorBait said:
Really, guys? Micromanaging how to accept a compliment? I thought it was common knowledge that the best way to accept a compliment is to just say, "Thanks" and move on. You don't dwell on it, and you don't downplay it. It shouldn't be a big deal. Hectorse gets it right again. Don't overthink these things, guys.

Exactly. She isn't going to break things off because someone said "thanks" instead of "yeah". :lol
 
GatorBait said:
Really, guys? Micromanaging how to accept a compliment? I thought it was common knowledge that the best way to accept a compliment is to just say, "Thanks" and move on. You don't dwell on it, and you don't downplay it. It shouldn't be a big deal. Hectorse gets it right again. Don't overthink these things, guys.
for any compliment just respond with "yeah I know..pssh like I don't know my (noun) isn't (adjective)"
 
nvm, still don't know what to do with this first girl. She's nice, but I just don't want to get in a relationship with her. She just facebook chatted me saying "Are you going to respond, or did i piss you off somehow." I honestly can't think of anything to say. I still want to be friends, but I feel like whatever I say it's just gonna end up being awkward between us.

I swear to god. No girls for a long time, and then both just have to come at the same time...
 
Just date both if you are not serious with either. Then break it off with the other if you get serious with one.
 
I wouldn't break it up with 1 before you get with (officially and all that) 2. Maybe 1 gets better once you get to know her, and maybe you can try stuff in dates with 1 you are unsure of doing with 2.
 
whitehawk said:
nvm, still don't know what to do with this first girl. She's nice, but I just don't want to get in a relationship with her. She just facebook chatted me saying "Are you going to respond, or did i piss you off somehow." I honestly can't think of anything to say. I still want to be friends, but I feel like whatever I say it's just gonna end up being awkward between us.

I swear to god. No girls for a long time, and then both just have to come at the same time...

See both of them. Go with whichever one you feel most comfortable/connection with then break it off with the other. There is nothing wrong with it. Girls do it to us all the time. This is called casual dating. Just let them both know you just want to see how things go. Thats no commitment till you are sure.
 
PEZIX said:
WRONG!

Never say thanks, it makes you sound suprised to be complimented which then leads to the idea that you had no idea which in turn sends out the message IM NOT CONFIDENT BECAUSE I DONT KNOW SHIT ABOUT ME!!

They way you take a compliment is you AGREE with the lady, be like " Yeah, Well I think your [compliment here]"...

I mean just role play saying the "thanks" response and then try the "yeah" response, and tell me which one sounds more sauve?

Saying thanks makes you sound like your talking to your grandma hahahaha
What the hell are you talking about? Responding to someone complimenting you by smiling and saying thanks or anything like that doesn't make you sound like you lack confidence at all. The people who go all "aaw, no I'm not" or "not really, it's just [luck, guess, someone else's help, *insert shitty diversion here*]" are the ones who sound like they lack confidence. The fact that you seem to think people need to purposely try and project confidence so hard (instead of learning to do it naturally) sounds like way more of an issue.
 
whitehawk said:
nvm, still don't know what to do with this first girl. She's nice, but I just don't want to get in a relationship with her. She just facebook chatted me saying "Are you going to respond, or did i piss you off somehow." I honestly can't think of anything to say. I still want to be friends, but I feel like whatever I say it's just gonna end up being awkward between us.

I swear to god. No girls for a long time, and then both just have to come at the same time...

You know you could just stay friends with her. Who knows, maybe she'll end up giving you connections to other hot girls down the road.
 
Don't worry I think its all good. She sent me a message apologizing for being too forward, didn't want it to be awkward etc, I responded, and I think everything is good.
 
Mr.City said:
What woman drinks gin and tonic? What type of person throws a drink in someone's face? That shit is expensive.
My mom is really into scotch *shrugs* I have a great aunt in San Francisco who drinks gin all the time though :lol (she's straight, not a butch)
 
Jayge said:
The fact that you seem to think people need to purposely try and project confidence so hard (instead of learning to do it naturally) sounds like way more of an issue.

I guess I just never say thanks its always an agreeing statement or whatever.. Like last night perfect example, I rolled up into Chipotle with my boy and there was this fine ass girl on the food line, so I ordered my chicken burrito (the shit) and she was hookin me up with a loaded burrito so I just commented "damn you makin my shit good" and she said "I make yours good cuz ur super cute" and I replied "yeah, well lets hangout cuz Im tryin to get you make me some of those at my pad" lol now were hangin out,.. I mean fuck that was easy and humorously smooth, she not really a keeper tho but she does have dat ass :lol

To me saying thanks is like a sorta mutual statement I guess, I say thanks when I have/want nothing left to say to a person, but "yeah" is a go getter for me.

Each man has his own game I guess but if you wanna give it a try you should and just see if you get a different response?
 
PEZIX said:
I guess I just never say thanks its always an agreeing statement or whatever.. Like last night perfect example, I rolled up into Chipotle with my boy and there was this fine ass girl on the food line, so I ordered my chicken burrito (the shit) and she was hookin me up with a loaded burrito so I just commented "damn you makin my shit good" and she said "I make yours good cuz ur super cute" and I replied "yeah, well lets hangout cuz Im tryin to get you make me some of those at my pad" lol now were hangin out,.. I mean fuck that was easy and humorously smooth, she not really a keeper tho but she does have dat ass :lol

To me saying thanks is like a sorta mutual statement I guess, I say thanks when I have/want nothing left to say to a person, but "yeah" is a go getter for me.

Each man has his own game I guess but if you wanna give it a try you should and just see if you get a different response?


My eyes are bleeding.
 
Jayge said:
What the hell are you talking about? Responding to someone complimenting you by smiling and saying thanks or anything like that doesn't make you sound like you lack confidence at all. The people who go all "aaw, no I'm not" or "not really, it's just [luck, guess, someone else's help, *insert shitty diversion here*]" are the ones who sound like they lack confidence. The fact that you seem to think people need to purposely try and project confidence so hard (instead of learning to do it naturally) sounds like way more of an issue.

This. PEZIX got it wrong.
 
PEZIX said:
I guess I just never say thanks its always an agreeing statement or whatever.. Like last night perfect example, I rolled up into Chipotle with my boy and there was this fine ass girl on the food line, so I ordered my chicken burrito (the shit) and she was hookin me up with a loaded burrito so I just commented "damn you makin my shit good" and she said "I make yours good cuz ur super cute" and I replied "yeah, well lets hangout cuz Im tryin to get you make me some of those at my pad" lol now were hangin out,.. I mean fuck that was easy and humorously smooth, she not really a keeper tho but she does have dat ass :lol

To me saying thanks is like a sorta mutual statement I guess, I say thanks when I have/want nothing left to say to a person, but "yeah" is a go getter for me.

Each man has his own game I guess but if you wanna give it a try you should and just see if you get a different response?

Agreed, saying just thanks doesn't advance shit and if you're looking to attract girls saying only thanks definitely won't help you. It just shows that you're a "nice" guy, and that does nothing to help you get more girls/dates. Of course thanks works if you have an angle that you will followup with right after, but other than that its just not that effective. This is fact.
 
PEZIX said:
I guess I just never say thanks its always an agreeing statement or whatever.. Like last night perfect example, I rolled up into Chipotle with my boy and there was this fine ass girl on the food line, so I ordered my chicken burrito (the shit) and she was hookin me up with a loaded burrito so I just commented "damn you makin my shit good" and she said "I make yours good cuz ur super cute" and I replied "yeah, well lets hangout cuz Im tryin to get you make me some of those at my pad" lol now were hangin out,.. I mean fuck that was easy and humorously smooth, she not really a keeper tho but she does have dat ass :lol

To me saying thanks is like a sorta mutual statement I guess, I say thanks when I have/want nothing left to say to a person, but "yeah" is a go getter for me.

Each man has his own game I guess but if you wanna give it a try you should and just see if you get a different response?

You are something else...
 
onemic said:
Agreed, saying just thanks doesn't advance shit and if you're looking to attract girls saying only thanks definitely won't help you. It just shows that you're a "nice" guy, and that does nothing to help you get more girls/dates. Of course thanks works if you have an angle that you will followup with right after, but other than that its just not that effective. This is fact.
Oh. Yeah. I thought that was implied but re-reading my post it wasn't really. I'm not saying that responding to a compliment just by saying "thank you" and dropping it is a great response, that's just boring. I agree with that.
 
onemic said:
Agreed, saying just thanks doesn't advance shit and if you're looking to attract girls saying only thanks definitely won't help you. It just shows that you're a "nice" guy, and that does nothing to help you get more girls/dates. Of course thanks works if you have an angle that you will followup with right after, but other than that its just not that effective. This is fact.

Geez people, c'mon. The best way to accept a compliment is simply to say "thanks" and move on. That's what a confident person does anyways. You are not looking to downplay yourself, nor are you coming accross as a douchebag by being "yeah, I know blah blah".
 
Jayge said:
Oh. Yeah. I thought that was implied but re-reading my post it wasn't really. I'm not saying that responding to a compliment just by saying "thank you" and dropping it is a great response, that's just boring. I agree with that.

What are you gonna follow it up with?

Edit: I guess could go like this:

-Her: "You are a great dancer".

-You: "Thanks". "Wanna dance this next piece?"

However, in most cases, I say it's better to just say thanks. And I think it's getting retarded that we are arguing so much about how to accept a compliment :lol
 
Rubenov said:
What are you gonna follow it up with?

I don't know something that makes you not look like a wuss. Because just saying thanks and not advancing anything makesyou look like a wuss. Once again saying thanks and just moving on works in situations not related to attracting girls. But since that's exactly what this thread is for, saying only thanks, especially when a girl compliments you on something is a big no no. It seems like you are arguing with just saying thanks when receiving compliments in common situations or by a random girl you're not that interested in attracted, and in those situations just saying thanks is completely fine.
 
onemic said:
I don't know something that makes you not look like a wuss. Because just saying thanks and not advancing anything makes you look like a wuss.

Because all girls like guys who are hard as fuck, right?

Thanks is fine, seriously. Saying "Yeah" makes you look like an arrogant, conceited (lol) douchebag, saying "Oh no I'm not" or something else makes you look like you severely lack confidence. Thanks is the only appropriate response.
 
onemic said:
I don't know something that makes you not look like a wuss. Because just saying thanks and not advancing anything makes you look like a wuss. Once again saying thanks and just moving on works in situations not related to attracting girls. But since that's exactly what this thread is for, saying only thanks, especially when a girl compliments you on something is a big no no.

Wat? When you say thanks, you do two things:

-You accept the compliment, so the person that said it feels good about saying it.

-You acknowledge that you are aware said compliment is true.

You remain confident, while the effort the other person made in giving it is somewhat rewarded. This does not equal wuss. After thanks you can quickly move/follow up with some game, but the compliment bit remains like that.
 
Rubenov said:
Wat? When you say thanks, you do two things:

-You accept the compliment, so the person that said it feels good about saying it.

-You acknowledge that you are aware said compliment is true.

You remain confident, while the effort the other person made in giving it is somewhat rewarded. This does not equal wuss. After thanks you can quickly move/follow up with some game, but the compliment bit remains like that.

I don't think you're reading my posts clearly. I'm saying just saying "thanks" and not advancing makes you look like a wuss. This is fact. Saying thanks works only if you have some sort of angle that you plan to follow up with immediately after, if not and you just do nothing then you definitely look like a wuss. And from the posts on the previous page your posts seem like you're implying only saying thanks and not following up is enough.

example

Girl: Your shirt looks nice
You: Thanks
You:(no advance)
*awkward moment*
You: Walk away

That's a perfect example of what happens if you try to just say thanks when attempting to attract/pick up girls. It just doesn't work if you don't have some angle or something to advance with immediately after.
 
Rubenov said:
Wat? When you say thanks, you do two things:

-You accept the compliment, so the person that said it feels good about saying it.

-You acknowledge that you are aware said compliment is true.

You remain confident, while the effort the other person made in giving it is somewhat rewarded. This does not equal wuss. After thanks you can quickly move/follow up with some game, but the compliment bit remains like that.
I don't think it always needs a follow-up, but with your dance example yeah you could offer to dance with her or offer to teach her something or whatever. (I don't fucking know, I don't dance :lol ) I usually try to compliment a person back or make a conversation out of whatever the compliment was about.
 
onemic said:
I don't think you're reading my posts clearly. I'm saying just saying "thanks" and not advancing makes you look like a wuss. This is fact. Saying thanks works only if you have some sort of angle that you plan to follow up with immediately after, if not and you just do nothing then you definitely look like a wuss. And from the posts on the previous page your posts seem like you're implying only saying thanks and not following up is enough.

Dude, okay, whatever.
 
onemic said:
I don't think you're reading my posts clearly. I'm saying just saying "thanks" and not advancing makes you look like a wuss. This is fact. Saying thanks works only if you have some sort of angle that you plan to follow up with immediately after, if not and you just do nothing then you definitely look like a wuss. And from the posts on the previous page your posts seem like you're implying only saying thanks and not following up is enough.

Do you happen to have the source of this facts? I'm curious to what other facts the source may contain. Thanks :D
 
onemic said:
I don't think you're reading my posts clearly. I'm saying just saying "thanks" and not advancing makes you look like a wuss. This is fact.

You keep saying that, how many times were you reincarnated as a woman before this life to know its a fact?

I think the word you're looking for is your opinion.
 
Conceited said:
You keep saying that, how many times were you reincarnated as a woman before this life to know its a fact?

I think the word you're looking for is your opinion.

Okay go let a girl you want to hook up with at a club, cofeeshop, etc. compliment you and just say thanks and do nothing. We'll see how many dates you manage to get.:lol
 
Jayge said:
I don't think it always needs a follow-up, but with your dance example yeah you could offer to dance with her or offer to teach her something or whatever. (I don't fucking know, I don't dance :lol ) I usually try to compliment a person back or make a conversation out of whatever the compliment was about.

The bolded part can be done, but tread lightly. If it's something that is true, then yes. There are compliments that can be returned, and others that can't. Examples:

Her:"Wow, you did a really good job in that paper! / (or whatever project).

You: "Thanks" *smile*. "So... blah blah blah (move on)

----------------------------------------------------------------


Her: "You are pretty handsome"

You: "Thanks." "You are not so bad yourself" *smile*.
 
onemic said:
Okay go let a girl compliment you and just say thanks and do nothing. We'll see how many dates you manage to get.:lol

I don't think i girl is going to go up to some random guy and blurt out a compliment then you say thanks and just stand there like a douche bag, your alrdy prob in a conversation already so its not like a compliment stops the conversation :lol

Anyways its a compliment so who cares......no wonder you guys can't get dates when you worry so much over a compliment....
 
Rubenov said:
The bolded part can be done, but tread lightly. If it's something that is true, then yes. There are compliments that can be returned, and others that can't. Examples:

Her:"Wow, you did a really good job in that paper! / (or whatever project).

You: "Thanks" *smile*. "So... blah blah blah (move on)

----------------------------------------------------------------


Her: "You are pretty handsome"

You: "Thanks." "You are not so bad yourself" *smile*.

This. You don't just stop having a conversation because someone compliments you, that makes no sense.
 
Rubenov said:
The bolded part can be done, but tread lightly. If it's something that is true, then yes. There are compliments that can be returned, and others that can't. Examples:

Her:"Wow, you did a really good job in that paper! / (or whatever project).

You: "Thanks" *smile*. "So... blah blah blah (move on)

----------------------------------------------------------------


Her: "You are pretty handsome"

You: "Thanks." "You are not so bad yourself" *smile*.
Yeah I've had that go into awkward territory several times but at least it built some experience. One of the few things I think I have down in my developing arsenal, although I don't really have the problems most people here do (yet, who knows what the fuck will happen in my 20s.)

Edit: this argument is incredibly confusing, I feel like I'm straddling both sides of it and I have no idea who to respond to. I think I'll go make a sandwich.
 
DualShadow said:
I don't think i girl is going to go up to some random guy and blurt out a compliment then you say thanks and just stand there like a douche bag, your alrdy prob in a conversation already so its not like a compliment stops the conversation :lol

Anyways its a compliment so who cares......no wonder you guys can't get dates when you worry so much over a compliment....

Okay then yes, if in midconversation and a girl compliments you, you can just say thanks and immediately continue talking, as it seems like such a compliment doesn't even phase you, and it makes you look confident. I was talking previously about the situation if a girl came up to you and compliments you as an opener.

I'm also assuming that's what Rubenov was arguing as well? If so then I agree with him on that.
 
onemic said:
I don't think you're reading my posts clearly. I'm saying just saying "thanks" and not advancing makes you look like a wuss. This is fact. Saying thanks works only if you have some sort of angle that you plan to follow up with immediately after, if not and you just do nothing then you definitely look like a wuss. And from the posts on the previous page your posts seem like you're implying only saying thanks and not following up is enough.

example

Girl: Your shirt looks nice
You: Thanks
You:(no advance)
*awkward moment*
You: Walk away

That's a perfect example of what happens if you try to just say thanks when attempting to attract/pick up girls. It just doesn't work if you don't have some angle or something to advance with immediately after.

Oh man. At no point have I advocated that you walk away... when I say move on I mean continue with other topics/flirting/whatever.
 
Jayge said:
Yeah I've had that go into awkward territory several times but at least it built some experience. One of the few things I think I have down in my developing arsenal, although I don't really have the problems most people here do (yet, who knows what the fuck will happen in my 20s.)

Edit: this argument is incredibly confusing, I feel like I'm straddling both sides of it and I have no idea who to respond to. I think I'll go make a sandwich.

I agree with your edit, except for the sandwich part, I'm at work :(
 
I got some questions

1. What if the girl says that she was at the barber shop and got a new haircut? Should I compliment her by saying that it looks nice/cute?

2. After I asked a girl I met if she has a bf and if they´re still together she told me that they still sleep in one bed but just as close friends. Well that did sound pretty weird/undecided to me so I´am not sure if I should make any further advances or if I should just bail out to avoid drama. So go for it or bail?

3. She told me that I´am a 'nice' person. Should I see this as a compliment/a sign that she likes me or not? Because you know...nice guys finish last...:/

4. We talked about our age and stuff and she said that she got a bit fat over the years and that her skin is not so fresh anymore bla bla bla....hell she was exaggerating because she looks damn fine...to me. I didn´t really know what to say when she told me that...so what would you say?
 
Max@GC said:
I got some questions

1. What if the girl says that she was at the barber shop and got a new haircut? Should I compliment her by saying that it looks nice/cute?

2. After I asked a girl I met if she has a bf and if they´re still together she told me that they still sleep in one bed but just as close friends. Well that did sound pretty weird/undecided to me so I´am not sure if I should make any further advances or if I should just bail out to avoid drama. So go for it or bail?

3. She told me that I´am a 'nice' person. Should I see this as a compliment/a sign that she likes me or not? Because you know...nice guys finish last...:/

4. We talked about our age and stuff and she said that she got a bit fat over the years and that her skin is not so fresh anymore bla bla bla....hell she was exaggerating because she looks damn fine...to me. I didn´t really know what to say when she told me that...so what would you say?

1. If you can notice a change sure
2. Personally i would bail out on that alone. (Is this close friend an ex-bf current bf? She is still screwing him that's for sure.)
3. Depends how she said it.
4. Say it looks fine to you? She was digging for a compliment with that anyways.
 
Max@GC said:
I got some questions

1. What if the girl says that she was at the barber shop and got a new haircut? Should I compliment her by saying that it looks nice/cute?

2. After I asked a girl I met if she has a bf and if they´re still together she told me that they still sleep in one bed but just as close friends. Well that did sound pretty weird/undecided to me so I´am not sure if I should make any further advances or if I should just bail out to avoid drama. So go for it or bail?

3. She told me that I´am a 'nice' person. Should I see this as a compliment/a sign that she likes me or not? Because you know...nice guys finish last...:/

4. We talked about our age and stuff and she said that she got a bit fat over the years and that her skin is not so fresh anymore bla bla bla....hell she was exaggerating because she looks damn fine...to me. I didn´t really know what to say when she told me that...so what would you say?
Nothing wrong with telling a girl that her haircut is nice. Go for it - without sounding like a weirdo while doing it.

You're riding a fine line of being friend zoned.

Also, bail out. That sounds like a bad situation waiting to happen. She sleeps in the same bed with her sort of but not really bf? Sounds to me like a textbook example of a girl using another guy to make knock her self-esteem up.
 
Max@GC said:
4. We talked about our age and stuff and she said that she got a bit fat over the years and that her skin is not so fresh anymore bla bla bla....hell she was exaggerating because she looks damn fine...to me. I didn´t really know what to say when she told me that...so what would you say?
You grab her arm fat and say "damn right your skin flabby you could hang that shit on a towel rack!" That is called "negging". It attracts her to you by lowering her self-esteem and making her more needy. Say that to her and she'll be on her knees begging for it in 6.8 seconds, guaranteed by a 7-foot illusionist with lady's makeup and blinking nipple LEDs.
 
demon said:
You grab her arm fat and say "damn right your skin flabby you could hang that shit on a towel rack!" That is called "negging". It attracts her to you by lowering her self-esteem and making her more needy. Say that to her and she'll be on her knees begging for it in 6.8 seconds, guaranteed by a 7-foot illusionist with lady's makeup and blinking nipple LEDs.
I hate to admit, but this kind of stuff is true.

I've got way more girls by clowning them then I ever did by holding open doors and showering them with compliments.
 
DY_nasty said:
Also, bail out. That sounds like a bad situation waiting to happen. She sleeps in the same bed with her sort of but not really bf? Sounds to me like a textbook example of a girl using another guy to make knock her self-esteem up.

She told me that they broke up a couple of months ago but ya seems like that she still loves him in a way and that I should just bail out. Thx though for your response and thx to the others too.
 
DY_nasty said:
I hate to admit, but this kind of stuff is true.

I've got way more girls by clowning them then I ever did by holding open doors and showering them with compliments.

Yep. teasing and busting their balls(in a funny way, not being a total ass) makes you look confident. Being "nice" just makes you look like a pussy.
 
I had no idea where that argument was going. The only thing I got outta it is "Facts - it's what onemic's opinions are."
 
demon said:
You grab her arm fat and say "damn right your skin flabby you could hang that shit on a towel rack!" That is called "negging". It attracts her to you by lowering her self-esteem and making her more needy. Say that to her and she'll be on her knees begging for it in 6.8 seconds, guaranteed by a 7-foot illusionist with lady's makeup and blinking nipple LEDs.

Rage mode activate
 
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