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[jhmtehgamr20xx]

...wat

She and the husband probably had a falling out and she used it as an opportunity to hate all black people for it.

I mean, falling out of love is hard, it hurts etc. But most people are smart and sane enough not to use that to hate on an entire block of people who bear just the slightest superficial resemblance to a lost love. It's still a non-excuse.

Anyone that's been around white people enough times when a black person leaves knows what happened.

This is way too over-generalizing.

Granted, it doesn't matter if there's "more to the story" or not either; there's no reason to hurl slurs at anyone, for any reason.

Ever.

 

[mugurumakensei]

Utterly disgusting, reprehensible, typical uneducated trash-



...wat

Is it really all that surprising? I don't think so. I said it before in another thread, and I'll say it here. Some women who are into black men basically fetishize certain attributes such that if you look beyond the surface level of the attraction, it's a disguised form of racism. It's basically the same thing as when white guys fawn over far east asian women or well any women that are 'exotic'. In the case of this thread, I wouldn't really be surprised if OP's now ex spouted such words when he wasn't around.

She and the husband probably had a falling out and she used it as an opportunity to hate all black people for it.

I mean, falling out of love is hard, it hurts etc. But most people are smart and sane enough not to use that to hate on an entire block of people who bear just the slightest superficial resemblance to a lost love. It's still a non-excuse.

Nah. If she did it out of anger, she'd still be a racist. Anger is one of the few emotions that triggers honesty as it dampens inhibitions which makes us more likely to speak the truth. It's the reason that "I didn't mean what I said" is a dumb excuse after a fight. You absolutely mean what you say.

 

[jhmtehgamr20xx]

Nah. If she did it out of anger, she'd still be a racist. Anger is one of the few emotions that triggers honesty as it dampens inhibitions which makes us more likely to speak the truth. It's the reason that "I didn't mean what I said" is a dumb excuse after a fine. You absolutely mean what you say.

Oh I 100% agree with you on that, just like how alcohol can bring out a person's true colors etc. I merely said that as an excuse such a woman and people like her tend to use to justify their idiotic racism.

 

[JigglesBunny]

Nobody is worth that kind of abuse. What a bunch of shit-heads.

 

[Liu Kang Baking A Pie]

This is way too over-generalizing.

I wish I could say it wasn't my experience, but I've got literally hundreds of stories of people just getting racist as fuck when in a group of other white people they trust. Your experience may vary depending on where you live and who you've associated with over time, but I know where the support for all of our racist laws, behaviors, and stereotypes are coming from. Racists exist in huge numbers, whether we like to admit it or not.

There was that thread recently where everyone was depressed reading about the anonymous admission by a teacher that they were failing a black student on purpose. It was surprising for a lot of people, but it was real as fuck for me. I've always known that shit was going on.

 

[funkypie]

Is it really all that surprising? I don't think so. I said it before in another thread, and I'll say it here. Some women who are into black men basically fetishize certain attributes such that if you look beyond the surface level of the attraction, it's a disguised form of racism. It's basically the same thing as when white guys fawn over far east asian women or well any women that are 'exotic'. In the case of this thread, I wouldn't really be surprised if OP's now ex spouted such words when he wasn't around.




Nah. If she did it out of anger, she'd still be a racist. Anger is one of the few emotions that triggers honesty as it dampens inhibitions which makes us more likely to speak the truth. It's the reason that "I didn't mean what I said" is a dumb excuse after a fight. You absolutely mean what you say.

Lol wot. So if a white person dates someone of an ethnic minority it's a disguised form of racism but not the other way around?

If we go by that logic then the op is just as bad as his now ex.

 

[Liu Kang Baking A Pie]

Lol wot. So if a white person dates someone of an ethnic minority it's a disguised form of racism but not the other way around?

If we go by that logic then the op is just as bad as his now ex.

mugurumakensei's post made plenty of sense. Your question is embarrassingly ignorant. That's not what was said.

 

[RagnarokX]

Need more info to write off the girlfriend. I'd say most likely she loves her parents despite the racism and/or is afraid of being disowned by them over their racism, so she wants the OP to apologize even though he's not the one whose wrong to placate her racist mom so she can eat her cake and have it, too. She's dealing with her parents getting divorced, too. Unfortunately the mom's behavior worked and scared away the OP. That just reinforces the mom's behavior. Might not be worth it to change the mom, but girlfriend might be worth rescuing.

 

[Yado]

Need more info to write off the girlfriend. I'd say most likely she loves her parents despite the racism and/or is afraid of being disowned by them over their racism, so she wants the OP to apologize even though he's not the one whose wrong to placate her racist mom so she can eat her cake and have it, too. She's dealing with her parents getting divorced, too. Unfortunately the mom's behavior worked and scared away the OP. That just reinforces the mom's behavior. Might not be worth it to change the mom, but girlfriend might be worth rescuing.

If she takes her mother's side on this she isn't worth "rescuing". She could just as easily have called him and apologised for her mother's behaviour.

 

[TAJ]

Anyone that's been around white people enough times when a black person leaves knows what happened.

I have a shaved head (baldness FTL) so I get a double dose of that.

 

[Fine Ham Abounds]

Is this better or worse than having one of those families that keeps it to themselves and you don't find out until you're married with kids that someone you trusted thought you were an animal for a long time

 

[Dreams-Visions]

2015, ladies and gentlemen. Sorry OP.

Indeed.

 

[mugurumakensei]

Lol wot. So if a white person dates someone of an ethnic minority it's a disguised form of racism but not the other way around?

If we go by that logic then the op is just as bad as his now ex.

No, I'm saying some people have superficial attractions that rely on racial stereotypes. It's a form of cultural fetishism which can be just as damaging as any other form of racism. I am not saying everybody who finds somebody of a different race attractive is racist.

Examples:

If a white guy dates an asian women because he assumes all asian women will be submissive and a good wife, he's probably (almost certainly) a racist.
If a white guy dates an asian woman because they became good friends, they hit it off, or any other form of natural bonding and sees her as a person, he's probably not a racist.

If a white woman dates a black guy because she assumes all black dudes are hung, she's probably (almost certainly) racist.
If a white woman dates a black guy because he's been a good friend, they hit it off, or any other form of natural bonding that doesn't require preconceptions about what he ought to have and sees him as a person and not as his skin, she's probably not racist.

 

[RagnarokX]

If she takes her mother's side on this she isn't worth "rescuing". She could just as easily have called him and apologised for her mother's behaviour.

No. If she apologized for her mother she'd be disowning her mother. She likely wants to keep both her mother and her boyfriend and in her head kissing her mothers' ass is the safest way to do that because her mom is less rational. Not so much taking her mother's side as trying to quell her mother so she can keep the status quo. Girlfriend's plan won't work out, but OP could talk her into disowning her family.

 

[Pai Pai Master]

Sorry OP. I went through this too and it sucks. Sucks even more that she chose to side with them, enabling that disgusting bigotry. You're better off now.

 

[Two Words]

She and the husband probably had a falling out and she used it as an opportunity to hate all black people for it.

I mean, falling out of love is hard, it hurts etc. But most people are smart and sane enough not to use that to hate on an entire block of people who bear just the slightest superficial resemblance to a lost love. It's still a non-excuse.



This is way too over-generalizing.

Granted, it doesn't matter if there's "more to the story" or not either; there's no reason to hurl slurs at anyone, for any reason.

Ever.

Or, she's just racist.

 

[Liu Kang Baking A Pie]

Or, she's just racist.

Yep.

Lots of rationalizing and justification in this thread, like we're all just calling people n-words whenever we're going through some hard life shit.

 

[Ms.Galaxy]

What was their reason for calling the FBI?

They came with homeland security because his parents reported me as a possible terrorist, claiming I was making bomb threats, that I was stalking their child for sexual purposes, and that I was a pedophile. Homeland Security called my boyfriend up and asked that we met with them at the hotel I was staying at. We went, we gave our side of the story, and one of the FBI guys actually rolled their eyes when all the facts were given. They still did a proper investigation of my room and person, but as expected, they found nothing. I was put on the no fly list during that time, but removed shortly after. Thank God.

The FBI agents, at the end, told us that we are both legal to consent to any sexual activities, they just warned us about sharing pictures and videos online before he was 18. So with the approval of law enforcement agents, we asked if they could tell that to his parents over speaker phone and we watched the ensuing meltdown of my boyfriend's mom as the FBI told them they can't make false claims like that and our relationship was legal. Again, nothing brings me great joy like his transphobic parents crying and throwing a tantrum over our relationship. The salt is so delicious.

 

[Zen_Arcade]

Of course you did.

Considering that I laid out exactly what he meant without anyone else in the thread explaining it I don't see why you think that's such an unreasonable thing.

The fact that he said "Spend enough time..." indicates that he doesn't think all white people do it. Just that it's common enough to make a comment on and that eventually you will run into that kind of behavior if you spend a lot of time around white people.

 

[Bluekaveli]

Good for you man! She doesn't deserve you. Now go use your free time to work on your grammar.

What's your fucking problem?


Op, I stepped into this thread again like, "damn this is like Othello."

Then I see your username lol. Well done.

 

[adamsappel]

I wouldn't be too fast to judge the girlfriend, her family likely lied her about what happened.

She was in the room while they were calling him that.

The last bastion of many racists are interracial relationships with their family members.

They may seem "normal" outside of that, but date their kid and their hearts are exposed.

The girlfriend also could have been dating a black guy to "get back" at the parents if she knew it would piss them off.

OP, did you ever get this feeling, or if it was some "jungle fever" bullshit on her part?

If you love the girl you shouldn't break it off with her because her family is full of shit. Her wanting you to apologize for yelling at them is iffy, but if we are being honest it is more likely coming from a place of ignorance rather than hate. She has no idea what it is like to be racially abused, so its only natural for her to want you to get along with her family and step above it.

I don't understand how you can think anyone singing along to rap songs makes them racist, but then excuse actual blatant hateful racism.

A woman in an interracial relationships spouts racist insults. We live in such a strange world.

She might have fallen for one of "the good ones" or she might be repeating what her husband thinks, a la Chris Rock's "I like black people, but I hate..." Maybe she's also come to hate her husband. It's tough to understand the racist mind.

That was not how he phrased his post. I gathered he thinks all white people do this.

I'd say either you've lived a very sheltered (or non-US) life, or you don't have older friends/co-workers who are ever in an interracial setting. What Liu Kang describes is hardly that unusual.

 

[zephry]

You are much better off without them. Time to shrug and move on.

 

[Yado]

No. If she apologized for her mother she'd be disowning her mother. She likely wants to keep both her mother and her boyfriend and in her head kissing her mothers' ass is the safest way to do that because her mom is less rational. Not so much taking her mother's side as trying to quell her mother so she can keep the status quo. Girlfriend's plan won't work out, but OP could talk her into disowning her family.

You don't see how she could call him in private and apologise for her mother's behaviour or at least send a text expressing some kind of solidarity with him without her mother knowing? How is that the same thing as disowning her mother?

 

[Zubz]

That's absolutely disgusting about what happened to you, OP (As well as to you, Ms. Galaxy). Both of those families (Barring Ms. Galaxy's BF) sound like absolute garbage, so I'm glad to see you're cutting them out of your lives. Their hateful actions are petty, prejudiced, reek of insecurity, and inexcusable, all without even getting into the fact that it's all blatant harassment. I can only imagine how awful it must be to actually know them.

But to the both of you, even with my limited perspective, I can guarantee that you're much better off now. Hopefully this is all over with that shitty family, OP (And even if it isn't, there has to be a case that can be made if they continue to harass you), and I'm glad to see you made the right move in breaking up with that girl.

 

[Thatonemoor]

For those that keep saying I need more info I'll now give a thorough retelling of what happened last night and then place it in the OP:

I go down to the town that she is working in that is a hour and fifteen minutes away from me to pick her up from work and get ready to go see star wars. When I get there I'm about 30 minutes early so I wait around for her to get off work. She then tells me that she is going to work for 2 more hours as oppose to get off in 30 minutes cause her mom found out we were going to the movies (her mom pretended to be her on Facebook and I didn't know who I was talking to) so she says that her mom is going to threaten to kick her out of her house and I don't take the threat seriously cause she has done it before (like with the picking her up late thing that happened once). So I stick around her work and we hang out a little cause things are slow. When her mom shows up to pick her up I go to my car and hide and the drive off. I go get gas and get my brother food when her mom calls me telling me she wants to kick her out of the house and calling me a nigger over and over again in the background. I tell her not to kick her out and I start getting mad and yelling at her mom (and apparently her sister). Her mom then threatens to burn a cross on my front lawn and hangs up. I angrily call back a couple times and then I get my brothers food and go home. My gf then calls me while I was driving and asks me to apologize to her sister and her mom and I'm like "fuck no they called me a nigger, I demand a apology". She seemed annoyed that I asked for a apology and then I hung up. She then calls me over and over again until 3:00 A.M. asking me to apologize to her little sister and I hang up every time. I block her on Facebook and I'm moving the fuck on. There that's everything that happened.

 

[BLACK AMERICAN PSYCHO]

What the fuck?!

I hate to say it, but the world would be better off if people like this were put in an early grave.

Would have told my mother. I'm pretty sure she would have killed her.

 

[SolVanderlyn]

So her mom pulls this and your girlfriend asks you to apologize for getting mad? See ya.

I want to say there's obviously nothing of value lost here, but I'm sorry for the potential value you thought the relationship had... that's harder to accept. Sorry, man.

 

[Krejlooc]

That family is trashy as fuck dude.

Moving on is the right thing to do. I'm sorry you had to go through that.

 

[neshcom]

For those that keep saying I need more info I'll now give a thorough retelling of what happened last night and then place it in the OP:

I go down to the town that she is working in that is a hour and fifteen minutes away from me to pick her up from work and get ready to go see star wars. When I get there I'm about 30 minutes early so I wait around for her to get off work. She then tells me that she is going to work for 2 more hours as oppose to get off in 30 minutes cause her mom found out we were going to the movies (her mom pretended to be her on Facebook and I didn't know who I was talking to) so she says that her mom is going to threaten to kick her out of her house and I don't take the threat seriously cause she has done it before (like with the picking her up late thing that happened once). So I stick around her work and we hang out a little cause things are slow. When her mom shows up to pick her up I go to my car and hide and the drive off. I go get gas and get my brother food when her mom calls me telling me she wants to kick her out of the house and calling me a nigger over and over again in the background. I tell her not to kick her out and I start getting mad and yelling at her mom (and apparently her sister). Her mom then threatens to burn a cross on my front lawn and hangs up. I angrily call back a couple times and then I get my brothers food and go home. My gf then calls me while I was driving and asks me to apologize to her sister and her mom and I'm like "fuck no they called me a nigger, I demand a apology". She seemed annoyed that I asked for a apology and then I hung up. She then calls me over and over again until 3:00 A.M. asking me to apologize to her little sister and I hang up every time. I block her on Facebook and I'm moving the fuck on. There that's everything that happened.

It's clear she's lost in the mind games of working around her family life. She isn't siding with her mom and sister, she's trying to sate them--still a shit move in a relationship. It's childish and selfish, but probably a habit learned from having a childish, selfish family. The binary to her is you apologizing or you breaking up with her--standing up to her family isn't an option.

Sorry man, you gotta find a grown up.

 

[hardcastlemccormick]

For those that keep saying I need more info I'll now give a thorough retelling of what happened last night and then place it in the OP:

I go down to the town that she is working in that is a hour and fifteen minutes away from me to pick her up from work and get ready to go see star wars. When I get there I'm about 30 minutes early so I wait around for her to get off work. She then tells me that she is going to work for 2 more hours as oppose to get off in 30 minutes cause her mom found out we were going to the movies (her mom pretended to be her on Facebook and I didn't know who I was talking to) so she says that her mom is going to threaten to kick her out of her house and I don't take the threat seriously cause she has done it before (like with the picking her up late thing that happened once). So I stick around her work and we hang out a little cause things are slow. When her mom shows up to pick her up I go to my car and hide and the drive off. I go get gas and get my brother food when her mom calls me telling me she wants to kick her out of the house and calling me a nigger over and over again in the background. I tell her not to kick her out and I start getting mad and yelling at her mom (and apparently her sister). Her mom then threatens to burn a cross on my front lawn and hangs up. I angrily call back a couple times and then I get my brothers food and go home. My gf then calls me while I was driving and asks me to apologize to her sister and her mom and I'm like "fuck no they called me a nigger, I demand a apology". She seemed annoyed that I asked for a apology and then I hung up. She then calls me over and over again until 3:00 A.M. asking me to apologize to her little sister and I hang up every time. I block her on Facebook and I'm moving the fuck on. There that's everything that happened.

Thanks for posting the full story. Too bad people on GAF can't just take your word for it that the OP contains all the information they need.

You are totally right in bailing and I feel for you, man.

 

[Enzom21]

What the fuck?!

I hate to say it, but the world would be better off if people like this were put in an early grave.

Yeah that is why I find it annoying when people come into these threads looking to excuse racism. Although based on post history, I am not really surprised by who's doing it in this thread.

 

[Solid Samus]

What the fuck?!

I hate to say it, but the world would be better off if people like this were put in an early grave.

My mother's side of my family is pretty damn black, but I ended up being the whitest member of my family where apparent skin color is concerned. The dumb shit I hear on a weekly basis from cunts who think I'm 'one of them', man. There's no wrapping your head around adults locked in a state of perpetual petulant childhood and one of these days I'm gonna snap and just beat the everloving shit out of whoevers stupid enough to bring that kinda shit up to me til they're blacker than I am. Shit gets me steamed.

 

[Bluekaveli]

For those that keep saying I need more info I'll now give a thorough retelling of what happened last night and then place it in the OP:

I go down to the town that she is working in that is a hour and fifteen minutes away from me to pick her up from work and get ready to go see star wars. When I get there I'm about 30 minutes early so I wait around for her to get off work. She then tells me that she is going to work for 2 more hours as oppose to get off in 30 minutes cause her mom found out we were going to the movies (her mom pretended to be her on Facebook and I didn't know who I was talking to) so she says that her mom is going to threaten to kick her out of her house and I don't take the threat seriously cause she has done it before (like with the picking her up late thing that happened once). So I stick around her work and we hang out a little cause things are slow. When her mom shows up to pick her up I go to my car and hide and the drive off. I go get gas and get my brother food when her mom calls me telling me she wants to kick her out of the house and calling me a nigger over and over again in the background. I tell her not to kick her out and I start getting mad and yelling at her mom (and apparently her sister). Her mom then threatens to burn a cross on my front lawn and hangs up. I angrily call back a couple times and then I get my brothers food and go home. My gf then calls me while I was driving and asks me to apologize to her sister and her mom and I'm like "fuck no they called me a nigger, I demand a apology". She seemed annoyed that I asked for a apology and then I hung up. She then calls me over and over again until 3:00 A.M. asking me to apologize to her little sister and I hang up every time. I block her on Facebook and I'm moving the fuck on. There that's everything that happened.

Little sister? They're fucking ruined. Entire family is brainwashed.

 

[Ploid 3.0]

She was in the room talking to her mom when her mom called. I heard her in the background trying to calm me down.

Sucks when this type of thing happens, but yeah you did the right thing breaking free of that. The girl let her mom get away calling you that, and not just using the word but she obviously has hate for other people. Maybe the girl is trying to appease to the family and mom to not get kicked out, but it's pretty crappy to ask the person that was called racial slurs to apologize. Not ok, goodbye, hope you escape your racist family some day buddy.

 

[BruceCLea]

Oh I fucking am.

Find out where that woman works and tell them she's a racist. Call her back and record her calling you that and use it as evidence. Seriously, fuck her.

 

[Ploid 3.0]

Find out where that woman works and tell them she's a racist. Call her back and record her calling you that and use it as evidence. Seriously, fuck her.

Nah, just let it go, be the better human and get out of that mess. Some duded will probably try to kill you, or the person she works for may agree with her. The only time people get fired like that is when something gets viral enough to make the company look bad.

 

[andthebeatgoeson]

And you did it the best way possible. Saw just a little of it and kept moving. But did you not see any warning signs?

 

[GaimeGuy]

I've been there, OP. With a girlfriends parents calling me racial slur and threatening me with violence if I continued to see their daughter.

Where our stories diverge is my girlfriend told them to pound sand and we literally ran off together. Our 20 year anniversary is this month.

Of course, we were already talking about marriage before her parents dropped the n-word (at least to my face), so this only accelerated our plans. Not sure where you were in your relationship; and if the threat of kicking her out was credible, so I can understand her reluctance or even fear on opnely challenging her parents racism, potentially jeopardizing her place to live for what maybe a new relationship. My understasning ends, however, at the part where she expected you to apologize. Her phone call should have consisted of her apologizing to your for what they said.

You made the right call, OP.

Yeah, while the parents' behavior was reprehensible, the relationship is between you and the girl. And she knew that they went KKK on you, yet wanted you to apologize to them (for the mere act of yelling at them). Even if she loves you and did it out of fear of her parents, that's a deal breaker. You can't side with the loved ones who spew such vitrol over the loved one who merely stood up for himself.

Hopefully, if she doesn't share their beliefs, she becomes a better person from this, but she's blown her chance with the OP.

 

[howdyjacker]

You did right bro. Life is too short to waste on the unwilling.

Leave them behind... where they belong

 

[RagnarokX]

You don't see how she could call him in private and apologise for her mother's behaviour or at least send a text expressing some kind of solidarity with him without her mother knowing? How is that the same thing as disowning her mother?

I said we need more info. It sounded like when she asked the OP to apologize it was with her mother present and the OP has blocked off all contact since. She's not going to side with the OP with her mother in the room. Sounds like she's really afraid of getting kicked out of the house and losing her family. The OP updated that she called until 3AM when he blocked her off asking to apologize to the sister. Was the sister racist, too? What was said to her? It'd be good to talk it over after emotions have died down and without the mother present. Make a decision then.

 

[Stallion Dan]

Need more info to write off the girlfriend. I'd say most likely she loves her parents despite the racism and/or is afraid of being disowned by them over their racism, so she wants the OP to apologize even though he's not the one whose wrong to placate her racist mom so she can eat her cake and have it, too. She's dealing with her parents getting divorced, too. Unfortunately the mom's behavior worked and scared away the OP. That just reinforces the mom's behavior. Might not be worth it to change the mom, but girlfriend might be worth rescuing.

If she takes her mother's side on this she isn't worth "rescuing". She could just as easily have called him and apologised for her mother's behaviour.

If her mother is right there with her she can hardly apologise for her behaviour and not make things worse at home, and if she needs stay sweet with her mum or else get booted out then she needs at least pretend to stay sweet.

I think OP should at least talk to the girlfriend when her mother isn't about.

 

[Triggerhappytel]

The mum sounds like a psychotic arsehole and the girlfriend is not reliable if she thinks you're in the wrong. Fuck the lot of them and stay as far away as you can.

 

[Two Words]

The girlfriend is a grown woman and is accountable for the side she takes, regardless of the reasons.

 

[Gattsu25]

For those that keep saying I need more info I'll now give a thorough retelling of what happened last night and then place it in the OP:

I go down to the town that she is working in that is a hour and fifteen minutes away from me to pick her up from work and get ready to go see star wars. When I get there I'm about 30 minutes early so I wait around for her to get off work. She then tells me that she is going to work for 2 more hours as oppose to get off in 30 minutes cause her mom found out we were going to the movies (her mom pretended to be her on Facebook and I didn't know who I was talking to) so she says that her mom is going to threaten to kick her out of her house and I don't take the threat seriously cause she has done it before (like with the picking her up late thing that happened once). So I stick around her work and we hang out a little cause things are slow. When her mom shows up to pick her up I go to my car and hide and the drive off. I go get gas and get my brother food when her mom calls me telling me she wants to kick her out of the house and calling me a nigger over and over again in the background. I tell her not to kick her out and I start getting mad and yelling at her mom (and apparently her sister). Her mom then threatens to burn a cross on my front lawn and hangs up. I angrily call back a couple times and then I get my brothers food and go home. My gf then calls me while I was driving and asks me to apologize to her sister and her mom and I'm like "fuck no they called me a nigger, I demand a apology". She seemed annoyed that I asked for a apology and then I hung up. She then calls me over and over again until 3:00 A.M. asking me to apologize to her little sister and I hang up every time. I block her on Facebook and I'm moving the fuck on. There that's everything that happened.

Stay away from that family, man. Glad you're alright and its good to just move on.

 

[commedieu]

Thank God they didn't make shit up and call cops.

Rummmnnnnnn bruv.

 

[Yado]

I said we need more info. It sounded like when she asked the OP to apologize it was with her mother present and the OP has blocked off all contact since. She's not going to side with the OP with her mother in the room. Sounds like she's really afraid of getting kicked out of the house and losing her family. The OP updated that she called until 3AM when he blocked her off asking to apologize to the sister. Was the sister racist, too? What was said to her? It'd be good to talk it over after emotions have died down and without the mother present. Make a decision then.

If she's so far under her mother's thumb that she can't even speak up when she's calling her boyfriend a nigger it sounds like the relationship wouldn't work anyway doesn't it?

 

[Juke Joint Jezebel]

Sounds like a pretty disfunctional relationship between a mother and her daughter. On the one hand you have a racist mother who seems overly demanding about who her daughter dates, always threatening to kick her out, and on the other hand you have a Daughter who seems to constantly overlook her Mother's bigotry, and expects the person recieving the verbal schtick to aplogize. Sounds like nothing but a hassle to deal with those two while trying to maintain a relationship.

You dodged a major bullet OP. Let them bicker amongst themselves. Sounds like that family deserves each other!

 

[VanillaCakeIsBurning]

I wish I could say it wasn't my experience, but I've got literally hundreds of stories of people just getting racist as fuck when in a group of other white people they trust. Your experience may vary depending on where you live and who you've associated with over time, but I know where the support for all of our racist laws, behaviors, and stereotypes are coming from. Racists exist in huge numbers, whether we like to admit it or not.

There was that thread recently where everyone was depressed reading about the anonymous admission by a teacher that they were failing a black student on purpose. It was surprising for a lot of people, but it was real as fuck for me. I've always known that shit was going on.

WTF

You have a link to this?

 

[Liu Kang Baking A Pie]

WTF

You have a link to this?

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=187040282&postcount=2628

 

[RagnarokX]

The girlfriend is a grown woman and is accountable for the side she takes, regardless of the reasons.

A grown ass woman still living at home who is afraid of getting kicked out of her house who probably loves her family. Disowning your family seems like an easy decision to you, but this kind of situation has to be causing a crazy amount of cognitive dissonance for the girlfriend. It's not easy to make decisions that will get you thrown on the street and cut off from a big chunk of your financial and social support network. He should at least talk to her after emotions have died down. Maybe she'll disown her family if she can be assured she doesn't need them.

If she's so far under her mother's thumb that she can't even speak up when she's calling her boyfriend a nigger it sounds like the relationship wouldn't work anyway doesn't it?

Well, she's living in the house and is afraid of getting kicked out. If she can move out that would take away a lot of the mother's control. OP could help her do it.