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[NME]

For maximum funny:

1. View the video.
2. Read this thread.
3. View the video again.

Optional:
4. Climb Mount Everest, gay man.

 

[Battersea Power Station]

Sometimes news agents are quite interesting. You know, the news agents probably see a lot of people coming in, not many blokes in makeup, and they see me and I see the signal goes through to the brain, and the brain goes,

“No information on this! No information! No information! No previous experience in this area… No previous… no previous… no previous experience… Don’t know what the fuck to do. Suggestions, get all the packs of crisps out of the way.”

“Okay, we’ll do that…”

“So I’ll tie all these papers together.”
“All right…”

“What- what- what do you want?!”

I can see that in their eyes, and I say, “I want a pack of crisps! I’ve got money.” And they go,

“What, you eat crisps? Thought you wanted to shag crisps!”

“No, I don’t do that…”

I have no idea what any of this means.

 

[sykoex]

she was thinking about what would REALLY be the absolute most shocking thing for him to be and to her it would be that he was actually gay and she said it outloud by mistake.

 

[Christoff Yurievich]

I have no idea what any of this means.

I think it means he's British and wears makeup. News agents are maybe the guys in charge of the corner newspaper stand, but they're called "agents" on the isle?

EDIT: based on what Matt said I change my answer to an Eddie Izzard bit.

 

[hooded pitohui]

Announcer: You're watching Channel 4 News with five-time Emmy award-winning anchor Ron Burgundy and Tits McGee.
Veronica Corningstone: Good evening, San Diego. I'm Veronica Corningstone. Tits McGee is on vacation.
Ron Burgundy: And I'm Tits... I'm Ron Burgundy.

 

[Matt]

Sometimes news agents are quite interesting. You know, the news agents probably see a lot of people coming in, not many blokes in makeup, and they see me and I see the signal goes through to the brain, and the brain goes,

“No information on this! No information! No information! No previous experience in this area… No previous… no previous… no previous experience… Don’t know what the fuck to do. Suggestions, get all the packs of crisps out of the way.”

“Okay, we’ll do that…”

“So I’ll tie all these papers together.”
“All right…”

“What- what- what do you want?!”

I can see that in their eyes, and I say, “I want a pack of crisps! I’ve got money.” And they go,

“What, you eat crisps? Thought you wanted to shag crisps!”

“No, I don’t do that…”

:lol :lol :lol Gotta love Eddie.

 

[the year 20XX]

Damn, why did I have to waste 'pull a boner' on the other thread! I should have waited!

 

[koam]

can't stop watching this