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Hollywood can stop, because no plot will ever top this (Unstoppable)
- Thread starter Lionel Mandrake
- Start date
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VeryGooster
Banned
My friend and I believe that it is a true story based on the probability that a black guy and a white guy had a conversation of some sort near a train at some point in time. So yeah, Unstoppable totally happened.
There was a made for TV movie about an out of control train with people on it in the 80s. Does anyone remember the name? They tired to stop it with a cargo helicopter and in the end it went off a bridge.
EDIT: I think it was a prototype computer-controlled train.
EDIT EDIT: It was called Final Run
EDIT: I think it was a prototype computer-controlled train.
EDIT EDIT: It was called Final Run
Ganondorfo
Junior Member
Its the phantom train of final fantasy VI
Forceatowulf
G***n S**n*bi
I was 100% behind this movie until the cops shot at the train... like seriously?
Fuck I love Japan :lolConceited said:Might as well have gone for the Tokyo Drift crossover;
TheKaeptain
Banned
:lol :lol :lol :lolConceited said:Might as well have gone for the Tokyo Drift crossover;
In life either the Simpsons or Japan has done it first.
It happened in real life.AceBandage said:
Sadly, real life is not nearly as exciting as that trailer.
LiveFromKyoto
Member
Mudkips said:Why not direct the train to the nearest train station and have it run to the emergency stop line? Protip: This is a long dedicated track full of these breakaway stoppers, sand/gravel, etc. designed to gradually slow a runaway train.
I'm sure the story will be that this is a military SUPERTRAIN that's immune to physical damage and the car links are made of adamantium kryptonite and it was designed to plow though barricades and sand in the event of terrorist attack.
Also, the train's supercomputer brain becomes self aware and anticipates any rail changes and overrides the computer, shutting them down. That's why only a down to earth blue collar tough guy - just like you, target audience! - can overcome it. Nerds and the army are helpless once you neutralize their computers and guns.
AceBandage
Banned
Chichikov said:
Duur duur duur.
I'll shoot buckshot at a giant metal train.
OH NOES! IT RICOCHETED INTO MY EYE!
But, yeah, not nearly as exciting as the movie, and it even ended how I would think you'd end it.
Just get someone onto the train and pull the break.
Escape Goat
Member
Also whos idea was it to pack so much hazardous material into one transport?
Freshmaker
I am Korean.
Enough is enough! I have had it with the motherfucking stakes involved with this motherfucking train!Lionel Mandrake said:
MWS Natural
Member
Clevinger said:
VeryGooster
Banned
Chichikov said:
Way to spoil the end of the movie, dude!
Kidding. I wasn't gonna see it anyway.
Smiles and Cries
Member
turn this thread into good movies that we may not have seen that are now streaming...?
Warm Machine
Member
Uh guys...because a movie trailer is often cut really out of context the assumptions you may be making are completely wrong. Besides, Tony Scott's track record is pretty excellent really as is Denzels.
How About No
Member
Speaking of Eli how and when did Whitta get banned D:G-Fex said:
Lionel Mandrake
Member
Warm Machine said:
Sweet Jesus, I can't believe I really have to do this... Alright. Time to educate.
Welcome class, to today's lesson. Don't worry, there will be no exam, but it is recommended that you take notes if you've had difficulty with this subject in the past. So let's begin. The subject for today is Tony Scott's Unstoppable, featuring actors Denzel Washington and Chris Pine. For most it is quite apparent that the entire situation depicted by the trailer is in fact, unintentionally funny, however it is apparent that some people are having difficulty discerning this fact. Today, we will examine the trailer and hopefully, by the end of the lesson, we will all be in understanding about why this film is funny.
The first thing we need to establish immediately is the simple fact that trains are funny.
Why are trains funny? It's hard to be sure, but the general consensus is... "They just are." Obviously trains are incredibly useful, powerful, and awe-inspiring machines. They can rip through a car stuck on the tracks with no effort at all. Many US citizens have advocated for more funding in the railroad industry, which would offer quick and efficient transportation around the country. But at the end of the day, these magnificent devices are... funny. They're incredibly powerful, but they're limited to movement along tracks. They're comically large. Many of us associate them with popular culture elements, such as Back to the Future Part III, Thomas the Tank Engine, and other various subjects.
Besides that, the entire premise of a train going on a murderous rampage is immensely hilarious. As stated earlier, trains are incredibly powerful, but their mobility is so immensely limited. The entire problem could be solved by staying off the tracks. The notion that a train could be "lost" as one scene in the trailer mentions, is also incredibly funny. It's quite possible that in the film this is explained by something such as the devices used to keep track of trains malfunctioning and people being unsure of which way the switches have been turned, but this doesn't matter, because we, as the audience are presented with the fact that a town has misplaced an entire train, even though it should be incredibly easy to find.
But perhaps, the most humorous aspect of the train is that the trailer seems to show the train as an entity, or a demonic monster that can't be bargained or reasoned with. As the public cowers from the train as it continues it's rampage of destruction, one cannot help but find the situation humorous.
The cast of the film is also a source of comedy. One of the two main leads is portrayed by Denzel Washington, who is mostly known for his roles as hard-edged "badasses" who don't take anything from anybody. Obviously any decent actor shouldn't be seen as just a single character, but it's fun to do so. Obviously Kurtwood Smith's character on That 70s Show is vastly different from the one he portrayed in Robocop, but pretending that they're the same guy is very funny. We've seen Washington as corrupt cops, cold-blooded assassins, and a lone warrior wandering the barren wasteland of the Apocalypse. Seeing him trying to combat a train, seems rather silly in comparison.
The other lead is portrayed by actor Chris Pine, who so far has really only been noticed in the movie Star Trek, in which he played William Shatner's classic character Captain James T. Kirk. Just as we have with Washington, we are forced to compare the role in Unstoppable to the one in Star Trek, which featured massive sci-fi action with space battles, and laser fights. Seeing him fight the train seems to be a massive step down, in turns of drama. In Pine's case, the problem is only magnified by his short resume.
Obviously this type of humor involves some reaching from the participant, but is thoroughly enjoyable.
The final subject for today is the high amount of drama and action. The trailer shows a high amount of action scenes which seem very ridiculous, especially considering that the antagonist is a train. We see guys dangling from helicopters, firing assault rifles, and yelling dramatically, all in order to stop this train. At one point Chris Pine's character announces that he's going to "Run this bitch down," again further establishing the personification of the train and expressing an immense amount of drama. But the cherry on top of the dessert is the subplot. The train is going to run into another train, which is filled with innocent school children. This seems almost satirical, as it is one of the ultimate noble tasks a hero can have. This idea was even lampooned in Toy Story 3 earlier in the year. The humor is only made greater, when the audience can imagine several ways of solving this problem themselves. Again, there is likely some sort of reasoning in the movie which shoots down much of this logic, but it's not given to the audience at this time.
That concludes our lesson for today. I hope we all learned something. It's not an attack on the filmmakers or Hollywood, rather it's a genuine love of all that cheese big budget's have to offer. Unstoppable manages to provide said cheese in ten-fold.
Class is dismissed.
Awesome :lolLionel Mandrake said:Sweet Jesus, I can't believe I really have to do this... Alright. Time to educate.
Welcome class, to today's lesson. Don't worry, there will be no exam, but it is recommended that you take notes if you've had difficulty with this subject in the past. So let's begin. The subject for today is Tony Scott's Unstoppable, featuring actors Denzel Washington and Chris Pine. For most it is quite apparent that the entire situation depicted by the trailer is in fact, unintentionally funny, however it is apparent that some people are having difficulty discerning this fact. Today, we will examine the trailer and hopefully, by the end of the lesson, we will all be in understanding about why this film is funny.
The first thing we need to establish immediately is the simple fact that trains are funny.
Why are trains funny? It's hard to be sure, but the general consensus is... "They just are." Obviously trains are incredibly useful, powerful, and awe-inspiring machines. They can rip through a car stuck on the tracks with no effort at all. Many US citizens have advocated for more funding in the railroad industry, which would offer quick and efficient transportation around the country. But at the end of the day, these magnificent devices are... funny. They're incredibly powerful, but they're limited to movement along tracks. They're comically large. Many of us associate them with popular culture elements, such as Back to the Future Part III, Thomas the Tank Engine, and other various subjects.
Besides that, the entire premise of a train going on a murderous rampage is immensely hilarious. As stated earlier, trains are incredibly powerful, but their mobility is so immensely limited. The entire problem could be solved by staying off the tracks. The notion that a train could be "lost" as one scene in the trailer mentions, is also incredibly funny. It's quite possible that in the film this is explained by something such as the devices used to keep track of trains malfunctioning and people being unsure of which way the switches have been turned, but this doesn't matter, because we, as the audience are presented with the fact that a town has misplaced an entire train, even though it should be incredibly easy to find.
But perhaps, the most humorous aspect of the train is that the trailer seems to show the train as an entity, or a demonic monster that can't be bargained or reasoned with. As the public cowers from the train as it continues it's rampage of destruction, one cannot help but find the situation humorous.
The cast of the film is also a source of comedy. One of the two main leads is portrayed by Denzel Washington, who is mostly known for his roles as hard-edged "badasses" who don't take anything from anybody. Obviously any decent actor shouldn't be seen as just a single character, but it's fun to do so. Obviously Kurtwood Smith's character on That 70s Show is vastly different from the one he portrayed in Robocop, but pretending that they're the same guy is very funny. We've seen Washington as corrupt cops, cold-blooded assassins, and a lone warrior wandering the barren wasteland of the Apocalypse. Seeing him trying to combat a train, seems rather silly in comparison.
The other lead is portrayed by actor Chris Pine, who so far has really only been noticed in the movie Star Trek, in which he played William Shatner's classic character Captain James T. Kirk. Just as we have with Washington, we are forced to compare the role in Unstoppable to the one in Star Trek, which featured massive sci-fi action with space battles, and laser fights. Seeing him fight the train seems to be a massive step down, in turns of drama. In Pine's case, the problem is only magnified by his short resume.
Obviously this type of humor involves some reaching from the participant, but is thoroughly enjoyable.
The final subject for today is the high amount of drama and action. The trailer shows a high amount of action scenes which seem very ridiculous, especially considering that the antagonist is a train. We see guys dangling from helicopters, firing assault rifles, and yelling dramatically, all in order to stop this train. At one point Chris Pine's character announces that he's going to "Run this bitch down," again further establishing the personification of the train and expressing an immense amount of drama. But the cherry on top of the dessert is the subplot. The train is going to run into another train, which is filled with innocent school children. This seems almost satirical, as it is one of the ultimate noble tasks a hero can have. This idea was even lampooned in Toy Story 3 earlier in the year. The humor is only made greater, when the audience can imagine several ways of solving this problem themselves. Again, there is likely some sort of reasoning in the movie which shoots down much of this logic, but it's not given to the audience at this time.
That concludes our lesson for today. I hope we all learned something. It's not an attack on the filmmakers or Hollywood, rather it's a genuine love of all that cheese big budget's have to offer. Unstoppable manages to provide said cheese in ten-fold.
Class is dismissed.
Yes...most of the humor is that the villain in this movie is an inanimate object (that goes in a straight line on a predetermined track), and yet there is so much drama including a firing squad with complete with a sergeant to signal when to shoot. There's literally a million solutions to this problem that don't involve rappelling down a swinging helicopter rope/attaching additional trains to the rear/etc to run this bitch down. And the whole "it gets worse, there's another train with kids on it!" thing is just icing on the cake.
TheVampire
Banned
Looks like a job for SUPERMAN
I think they actually made it twice: Final Run - 4.2 on IMDB I watched it on TV once when I was sick, Unstoppable seems almost a direct coy from that trailer.GaimeGuy said:
which1spink
Banned
Would watch it if it was called SPE3D.
Napoleonthechimp
Member
They're going to run that bitch down. Fact.
DrForester
Kills Photobucket
Freshmaker said:
Shocked this took 5 pages.
Book of Eli was great
Dreams-Visions
Member
saw the trailer at a Machete screening...who cares about trains? fuck a train. MEH.
So...
As noted above, a very similar situation occurred in real life. (here)
It involved:
A runaway train loaded with a ton of hazardous materials.
Cops shooting at the train (trying to hit the "Fuel Safety Switch").
Boarding the train to stop it.
Aside from a few Hollywood-isms thrown in (the other trains), what's the big fucking deal? The plot is barely less believable than what actually happened. And it's an action movie. I would hope it would be a little more exciting than real life.
As noted above, a very similar situation occurred in real life. (here)
It involved:
A runaway train loaded with a ton of hazardous materials.
Cops shooting at the train (trying to hit the "Fuel Safety Switch").
Boarding the train to stop it.
Aside from a few Hollywood-isms thrown in (the other trains), what's the big fucking deal? The plot is barely less believable than what actually happened. And it's an action movie. I would hope it would be a little more exciting than real life.
RedStep said:
very dissimilar actually
http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=23164504&postcount=168
Lionel Mandrake
Member
RedStep said:
Please examine the demonstration above before asking questions regarding the humor involved with Unstoppable.
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