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[Cymbal Head]

If the curse you wish to break
There are actions you must take
Baggy clown pants must be worn
Lest the curse never be shorn

A unicycle must be ridden
If you wish the curse be hidden
And ye must wear a gopher hat
For half a week; remember that

The gopher must be living still
Else you and yours fall gravely ill
These steps you take, lest proved a rube!
(And put the whole thing on Youtube)

Give this man the $10,000

 

[New002]

Yo just equip a therapy ring to counteract the life-leech and you're golden OP!

 

[Plywood]

Yasssss lol

"Return the slab sword, or suffer my curse"

I love and appreciate you both.

 

[FunkyDealer]

If the curse you wish to break
There are actions you must take
Baggy clown pants must be worn
Lest the curse never be shorn

A unicycle must be ridden
If you wish the curse be hidden
And ye must wear a gopher hat
For half a week; remember that

The gopher must be living still
Else you and yours fall gravely ill
These steps you take, lest proved a rube!
(And put the whole thing on Youtube)

 

[TheRealTalker]

lol from Egypt too

we have a plot for a movie here

 

[vagabondarts]

Don't fail mankind, Isildur.

 

[mysocksarepink]

No pictures, huh?


Edit: jk

 

[Baconsaurus Rex]

So do you mean cursed or curved?

 

[drtomoe123]

No pictures, huh?

Sorry, there's one on the second page. I'll add it to the OP.

 

[Nanashrew]

We're all going to be consumed in the madness!

 

[Android18a]

Now use it to make a cursed salad.

 

[shaowebb]

If the curse you wish to break
There are actions you must take
Baggy clown pants must be worn
Lest the curse never be shorn

A unicycle must be ridden
If you wish the curse be hidden
And ye must wear a gopher hat
For half a week; remember that

The gopher must be living still
Else you and yours fall gravely ill
These steps you take, lest proved a rube!
(And put the whole thing on Youtube)

Please lord give this man a sig for this amazing post XD

 

[lastplayed]

 

[Soapbox Killer]

First you'll need know how it was cursed, if not you'll need the following:

Holy water to cleanse the blade,

Fire to purge the sins of the handle and the holder. (preferably on limestone or granite)

You MUST then bury the blade with the ashes from the handle no less than 3ft underneath the earth. There can be no grass or tress with 50ft (any direction). Also, no where near salt water. Make sure after you purge the sins you don't handle the blade or ashes with your bare hands, Wait 1 full cycle and return to the scene with fresh Jasmine.

Ask no man of the history of the blade until the AFTER the purge.

 

[stufte]

Can you mail these things?

and thanks for the info you guys, at least I know it's a kukri now

Yep, it's a decorative reproduction.

 

[Violet_0]

Yep, it's a decorative reproduction.

a cursed decorative reproduction

 

[foxtrot3d]

Seriously OP just mail it to me I'll make sure it is properly destroyed.

Spoiler

Or use it's magical powers for my own use, muahahaah!

Can you mail these things?

and thanks for the info you guys, at least I know it's a kukri now

Yes, there is nothing illegal about mailing a sword, knife, or any other sharp edged instrument.

 

[bengraven]

Blood sacrifice is needed.

Virgin preferably.

 

[barik]

How do you even burn a sword?

 

[Anion]

Cut a banana with it. That's the ultimate test to see if it is cursed. If the cuts the banana, it's cursed alright

 

[Ganzlinger]

lol at those people who don't believe in curses.

But don't worry, OP. You just need to bury it or sell it, the curse is on the sword not on you.

 

[Clydefrog]

How do you even burn a sword?

"Yo momma's so bad at slicing she couldn't even get the part of 'Dull Knife' in a Ginsu Knives infomercial!"

 

[Monocle]

lol at those people who don't believe in curses.

But don't worry, OP. You just need to bury it or sell it, the curse is on the sword not on you.

We're in the 21st century, right?

 

[Gouty]

I'm guessing the OP is from Cleveland.

 

[Shao Kahn Brewing a Stew]

EBay that curse!

 

[drtomoe123]

I'm guessing the OP is from Cleveland.

About 5 hours away, actually

 

[Ganzlinger]

We're in the 21st century, right?

Some curses can last through thousands of years. I wouldn't risk.

 

[gai_shain]

tie it up and throw it into a river, if it survives it is cursed and if it doesnt it wasnt

 

[LilZippa]

tie it up and throw it into a river, if it survives it is cursed and if it doesnt it wasnt

I believe it is if it floats you have to burn it.

 

[_Ryo_]

It doesn't look there's any bloodstains on it. Normally this would suggest that it hasn't killed anyone. But don't be fooled, OP, the Reality is much more sinister than that.

The lack of stains prove that this weapon drinks blood and has probably feasted on the lifeblood of a thousand innocent souls.

It's next victim is clearly your mental health, and unfortunately the only way to rid the thing of its curse is an act of ultimate sacrifice, and impaling yourself under the light of a harvest Moon. Otherwise you and everyone you interact with will be plagued with immense danger.

You've DOOMED us all.

I mean, that's the what I would say if I believed in curses.

Alternatively, give it to me.

 

[RM8]

You're not superstitious, that's for sure.

 

[Sinatar]

I believe it is if it floats you have to burn it.

It's a cursed sword, not a witch.

 

[PlayALLtheGames]

I'm not super superstitious, but this thing is starting to freak me out.

If you're that freaked out by it and nothing has even happened, you are super super super super super superstitious.

 

[Basketball]

You need to find a young lamb

i'll leave the rest to you

 

[Deosier]

I happen to deal with cursed swords, if you want to get rid of it ASAP I'll gladly take it off your hands. From the looks of it it's very cursed.

 

[Dreadnought]

Great now Gaf is cursed thanks op

 

[Tubobutts]

I would like to echo all the other people telling you to send it to me.

I have sword right in my name I'm probably an expert.

 

[Cow Mengde]

You need to cut off your foreskin with the sword first, then sell it.

 

[MattKeil]

Some curses can last through thousands of years. I wouldn't risk.

It's just science, people!

 

[MichaelFassbender]

1: It's cursed.

2: Give it to somebody, and have them accept it. Then, you'll be curse-free!

 

[Ultima_5]

Some curses can last through thousands of years. I wouldn't risk.

This thread is to much for me

 

[mrjohill]

 

[bionic77]

This is exactly how Ninja Gaiden started out.

The OP should be ok if he is the greatest ninja in the world. Otherwise I think he and the rest of us are fucked and should prepare for the world to soon be covered in darkness.

 

[drtomoe123]

If you're that freaked out by it and nothing has even happened, you are super super super super super superstitious.

I just found out a few days ago that I gotta get my wisdom teeth out in February. Coincidence? My dad also passed away from a random bout of pneumonia at the age of 50, so that irks me too.

But seriously. Thanks for the help everyone. I'm pretty serious about giving it away (I just get a weird vibe from it), so I'm gonna check locally and see if anyone wants it because that'll be easier for me. If no one bites, I'll definitely offer it to a GAFfer.

 

[FO-totality]

So is it a sword that's been cursed to be an axe or an axe that's been cursed to live out its days as a sword?

It's the neglected bastard child of two influential family, cast out into obscurity, vowing to make a name for themselves.

 

[Weiss]

Have you tried taking it to the New Londo Ruins? I hear there's a guy who's good at these kind of things.

 

[ginger ninja]

Umm that's not a sword, that's a Khanjar.

 

[Sourcerer]

Put it in the bin, trust me, I'm an expert, you won't see it again.

 

[FO-totality]

Umm that's not a sword, that's a Khanjar.

You're wrong too. It's a kukri

 

[ghostjoke]

It seems quite clear that the Cher memorabilia was keeping the curse intact. Believe in the power of Cher.