How to crack eggs like a badass (Serious Eats)

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entremet

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http://www.seriouseats.com/2014/10/how-to-crack-eggs-like-a-badass.html

I once had the honor of spending an afternoon cooking omelets with the legendary chef André Soltner. It's a task that seems simple but of course isn't, and for that reason making an omelet was what chefs would ask prospective employees to cook as an audition. As the well-known refrain goes, everything you need to know about a cook, you can learn by observing them make an omelet.

Interestingly, Soltner's lesson didn't start with the omelet. It started with cracking eggs. I'd been cracking eggs my whole life, but I had no idea just how detailed a person could be about the right way to do it. His method was rooted in extreme resourcefulness: Soltner grew up in wartime France, when food was often scarce. An egg, in those years, was beyond precious, a source of nutrition and sustenance like little else. To waste even a drop of it was unthinkable.

He showed me how to crack the egg, split the shell in two, dropping the white and yolk into a bowl, then cradle each half in his fingers, freeing his thumbs to carefully scrape every last bit of white from the shell halves. His method was deft, efficient, and beyond thorough.

Well, that's not what I'm here to show you today. Instead, I'm going to show you the exact opposite. You see, there are times—such as war and perhaps a calm weekend morning when you're taking the time to make the most painstaking omelet of your life for yourself and maybe, maybe a loved one—when that kind of care is essential. But then there are other times when speed, crude and rough, is all that matters.


As a guy who used to work a Saturday night dinner shift and then return to the restaurant early the next morning for a Sunday brunch that stretched into a dinner service, at least 15-hours on my feet working non-stop from start-to-finish, I know that sometimes you need to crack a lot of eggs as freaking quickly as possible.

For home cooks, speed-cracking is not something you need to do every day. But sometimes it comes in handy. Let's say you've rented a house on a lake with your friends, a whole big bunch of them plus all the significant others. And you wake up one chilly morning and decide to make scrambled eggs for the crowd. Sure, you could break the eggs one-by-one, semi-carefully, the way most of us normally do. But this is a moment that is crying out for some badassery. This is when you want to stand there in that rented kitchen and bang those motherf-ers out like nobody's business. Your friends will be astonished. They'll also be fed more quickly.
More at the link.

One handed technique



Two handed:

 

Haly

One day I realized that sadness is just another word for not enough coffee.
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I can do it onehanded.

I'm not fast or accurate by any means but it's my preferred method because I can feel my kitchen swag meter going up every time I do it.

I use three fingers for the top half of the shell though.
 

entremet

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It's all about twisting the two halves away from the crack as you pull them apart.
Not quite:

Here's more from the article:

But I'll tell you how I do it: I cradle the egg in my hand, in a grip that's somewhere between all-fingers and full-on palm. I make sure that I have my pinky and ring fingers gripping the bottom (wider) half of the egg, and my middle, index, and thumb on the top half. Using this grip, there should be one side of the egg still exposed and not covered by your hand or fingers—I whack that exposed part against whatever cracking surface I'm using. Then, holding the base of the egg steady with my pinky and ring finger, I pry the top half open with my other fingers. The egg should drop out into the bowl or China cap below.

It's not unlike the motion you might use to pop a soda can open one-handed, except with a soda can the thumb usually joins the ring and pinky fingers in steadying the can while the index and middle fingers (or maybe just the index finger) pry the tab. Here the thumb and middle fingers are helping out on that prying action.

Is this making sense? Yes? Great! No? Go grab an egg, I guarantee you that you'll figure it out. Or just look at the photos and gifs we've included here.
 

Funky Papa

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Jun 7, 2004
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I didn't make the gifs. They're from the site.

Strange that they didn't just video it straight. Serious Eats is a big site and it should be in their budget.

But the details are also in the full article.
I actually clicked on the link expecting a video. Nope.

It seems like such a glaring omission.

Goddammit. I've fallen into that site's black hole.
Bear with me.

Edit: FUCK THIS SHIT ALREADY. I should be making sweet love to my Excel reports, FFS.
 

Haly

One day I realized that sadness is just another word for not enough coffee.
Oct 10, 2006
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It's all about twisting the two halves away from the crack as you pull them apart.
For me, I crack the egg somewhere near the middle, and then use the a ball of my thumb to apply pressure along the same line before pushing upwards with my thumb-index-middle fingers while gripping with my ring-pinky-palm.

EDIT: Oh, he does the same thing.
 

Soneet

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.zZ

For someone who grew up breaking eggs (Chinese in a Chinese take away), this is so unimpressive.

I had to learn how to break an egg with two hands later in my life. It's like trying to tell someone that most people hold a fork with two hands and you're like... what
 
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