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[EdwardTivrusky]

We used to call it "ding dong ditch" back in 80's Long Beach.

Back in the 70s in Cardiff it was called "rat-a-tat ginger" never found out why. Time to google i think.

edit: It's from a poem, neat. Also you can be charged with attempted murder in the US if you shoot at damned kids knocking your door. Apparently, here in the UK they could face 14 days in jail but usually it's a stern telling off from their parents

Rat-a-tat, Ginger on wiki.

 

[Nose Master]

We ding dong ditched a cute girls house from HS once. I didn't actually run, though. Her mom invited us in for snacks.

Spoiler

Ended up going out with that girl for 6 years

 

[King Cobra]

TOP KEK @ setting up the dog turds

honestly all I can think of in this scenario is a quote from the regular show

You should be ashamed of yourself, a grown man yelling at baby ducks

 

[QueenOfThorns]

That was a mildly entertaining read, I enjoyed it enough. You got a gaggle of kids pranking you by ringing your doorbell, it must be on like Donkey Kong.

My family didn't celebrate Halloween, so she'd put a sign on the door saying "Due to specific religious beliefs, I do not celebrate Halloween or give out candy on October 31. If you wish to understand my religious belief, please take one of Jehovah's Witness tracts below." So understandably snide kids would read it and think this house was practically the most perfect target available for Mischief Night. A few Holidays of eggs and toilet paper followed to be sure.

Then one day I staked out the house that night and managed to pursue one kid. I leaped toward him to try to stupidly tackle him to prevent him from fleeing further, and I caught him on his legs and we stumbled into the grass. That's when I got a good look at him, impish kid looked like he was 15 or 16 and he had another kid who was 10-11 with him. Brown hair, dark eyes couldn't really tell so well what specific color in the dark. I surmised it was probably his brother, they sort of looked alike. Anyway he dashed backwards out of my grasp and he and his "I think brother" got away.

The next night I filled up a super soaker with ice water and waited. I thought long odds, but maybe he would think I would not recognize him and I'll see him walking the neighborhood on Halloween. Sure enough, I thank my lucky stars because here they both come with the 16 year old-ish kid was escorting his 11-ish brother-ish around the neighborhood. They approach my door, say "Trick or Treat" and I say "Trick" and unload after them with the ice cold water. Now it is fucking bitter out that night, unseasonably so for Fall even in The Poconos so I felt a little bad afterwards (I was young and prankful in High School, not cool) but especially because as they ran away the older kid tripped and dropped his candy but left it behind to keep running.

SO we gots a hefty bag of candy for free since they never came back around again. Figured it was fair compensation anyway for all the egg I had to clean off the side of my House.

Now as a 30 year old dude I feel bad about doing that to them, but I was young and stupid too. Not terribly older than the 16 year old-ish boy.

You were 29.

 

[Alligatorjandro]

Throw a knife at them

 

[Amir0x]

You were 29.

No, I wasn't.

 

[Iph]

Confuse them with kindness.

 

[akira28]

Jayden is like 6-8 years old (I think 8), but he is not the same kid as "Jay" (short for Jason), the 17 year old who is possibly the one coercing others to do it, I don't know.

Don't be fooled. Older Jayden is the muscle. The enforcer of the two. Young Jayden is the real threat. I'd keep an eye on him because he's smart enough to take you down. He already has a network in place.

 

[gutter_trash]

release the hounds

 

[Ragnaroz]

Had this happen to me once. I just ignored it and after a few times(3-4), the kids just stopped. You're just making yourself a target by doing all that stuff. It's just making it more exciting for them. Kids will be kids.

 

[spindashing]

Happened once and we have cameras so we knew it was a girl who lived next door. My silly mom called out to her and gave her candy. The girl looked deathly scared but took the candy and thanked my mom.

The girl never did it again, lol.

 

[Air Zombie Meat]

Dog poo and water isn't going to hurt anyone. I don't want to hurt them, just humiliate them.

Not true. Dog shit can cause many kinds of illness, including blindness. I realise thats unlikely to happen from what you're doing but it isn't harmless.

 

[CMojicaAce]

Step 1: Install a fence and gate.
Step 2: Rig the gate to close when the doorbell is rung.
Step 3: Let them ring the doorbell.
Step 4: Release the hounds.

 

[ramuh]

You should rig a trap. LIke put caltrops down or something.

 

[Shaneus]

Dog poo and water isn't going to hurt anyone. I don't want to hurt them, just humiliate them.

Sounds like you've humiliated them alright. Posting on GAF was the best thing to do in that regard.

I'd just ignore them. They are looking for a reaction, and you keep giving them that.

Ugh, it should be this. Despite the claims of bricks or whatever, they were probably saying it to get a rise out of you. Kids know how to push buttons, and not just ones attached to the fronts of houses.

They'd have given up by now if OP hadn't gone to all this effort. Shit, if I was doing something that I knew was pissing someone off I didn't like, I'd keep doing it.

I'm enjoying this thread, but it reads just like one of those fake Reddit stories a la the dude who caught his wife cheating on him.

Also,

 

[Falcs]

You were 29.

lol.

 

[Xcellere]

If you live in a Stand Your Ground state, consult your local gunsmith.

If you don't live in a Stand Your Ground state, build a network of underground tunnels with secret passageways that lead to torture chambers, like H. H. Holmes. Bribe the local mortician to lend you 20-or-so bodies and display them in various scenes of torment.

Jerry-rig the doorbell to open a trap door beneath the intruders feet that drops them into your underground network. Let the trapped teen wander alone and in the dark for just under two hours, and then release them. News of their plight will spread throughout the local high school.

No prisoners. No mercy.

 

[hydrophilic attack]

It seems you have the necessary equipment (car, video camera, garden hose) so you should follow the following plan:

1. Run over Jason with your car.
2. Kidnap Shawn, set up an elaborate mechanism with your garden hose that will make him slowly drown. Film it and send to his father while there is still a chance to save him.
3. Burn down your house and all the evidence.

 

[SamuelSupreme]

Shotgun then sprinkle some crack on the Johnson

 

[CosmicGroinPull]

Buy a sword, attach it to a swivel activated by the doorbell, hide the whole thing in a drain pipe next to the door

 

[ConfusingJazz]

Jeez, just sit outside with a garden hose and a beer away from the front door, it's not that hard.

 

[NeoGiff]

It seems you have the necessary equipment (car, video camera, garden hose) so you should follow the following plan:

1. Run over Jason with your car.
2. Kidnap Shawn, set up an elaborate mechanism with your garden hose that will make him slowly drown. Film it and send to his father while there is still a chance to save him.
3. Burn down your house and all the evidence.

I've been cracking up at this thread all day so far, but this sent me over the edge.

JASOOOOOON!!

 

[striferser]

LOL
I admire your dedication OP. Especially that dog shit and that "Home alone" trap.
Good luck on catching the culprit.

 

[Souldestroyer Reborn]

Aren't you American?

You guys are allowed to just shoot people for entering your garden are you not?

Seriously though, just call the cops and get them to shoot the culprits for you, saves you all the hassle of court and stuff.

 

[The Mule]

Jayce?

I think I know where things went wrong in that kid's life.

 

[Ray Wonder]

I used to have this problem. We cut the line to the doorbell, but we kept it up. They think they're ringing it, but nothing happens. They run away, and I have no idea.

 

[Agent Gibbs]

Fun read OP, i understand the irritation, a couple of times is a prank, continuing it is a campaign of victimisation


you need to set up a paintball gun on a motion detector like a turret like THIS, if the kid is shot and marked you have your evidence

 

[Always-honest]

Nothing. If they do it often, i'll tell them to stop. Stand behind the door and scare the living shit out of them. Bring it kids.

 

[infiniteloop]

get one of these:

https://ring.com

it's got motion detection too, so you'll know they're there before they ring. Record the video and play it back to the parents.

 

[MarkMclovin]

Wipe shit on the doorbell

 

[samn]

Dog barks every time. Hard to ignore. She's wearing a spray bark collar most of the time, since she has a habit of barking at people behind the house, so she gets sprayed because of it too.

Look up positive reinforcement training.

 

[Amory]

This is literally the funniest thread I've ever read on gaf. Absolutely hilarious.

OP they're targeting your house because it's apparently really easy to get a rise out of you. Completely ignore it for a while and they'll stop.

 

[Tevious]

It seems you have the necessary equipment (car, video camera, garden hose) so you should follow the following plan:

1. Run over Jason with your car.
2. Kidnap Shawn, set up an elaborate mechanism with your garden hose that will make him slowly drown. Film it and send to his father while there is still a chance to save him.
3. Burn down your house and all the evidence.

LMAO, nice Heavy Rain reference!

Fun read OP, i understand the irritation, a couple of times is a prank, continuing it is a campaign of victimisation


you need to set up a paintball gun on a motion detector like a turret like THIS, if the kid is shot and marked you have your evidence

That would give them the surprise of their life, lol.

get one of these:

https://ring.com

it's got motion detection too, so you'll know they're there before they ring. Record the video and play it back to the parents.

Sounds nice, but I'm not spending $200 on that. Motion Lights and a night vision Foscam will have to do.

This is literally the funniest thread I've ever read on gaf. Absolutely hilarious.

OP they're targeting your house because it's apparently really easy to get a rise out of you. Completely ignore it for a while and they'll stop.

Those that I've caught and met have not tried it again. In fact, I haven't had it happen since I caught Jayce. There's 2 kids out there that are apparently involved that may not even know the others were busted. There was an attempt by Bailey last Sunday, but she chickened out. I have a feeling this Bailey and Chris have not been told that the others were caught because they want Bailey and Chris to get busted too. If it happens again, it will most likely be on Friday or Saturday and all I really need to do is take the footage from my Foscam to their home and show the parents. Maybe even have the cops be the ones that do it.

 

[Doc_Drop]

You need to find a way to hook up an airhorn to the doorbell so when they press it they get a huge blast. Other than that, I really like the doormat/tape thing you had going on. Just upgrade to Gorilla tape and they aint never getting away.

Great story though