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[RefigeKru]

Sell the film cameras too. Get a credit card and a job. Any sort of shelters in the area?

there are always some exceptions like if this is your 5th try at getting through 1st year

This is the thing, I need the film cameras to pass one of the courses I'm on. A2 photography. I'm on my last year.

My first two years of college were a bust, doing this art and design course I was no good at. A National Diploma dealing with graphics, textiles, multimedia and 3D woodwork. I was really good at two of those, and really shit at the other two. Visual studies, I rocked, along with contextual. But that wasn't enough to pass. I utterly convinced myself I was a failure then and I almost messed up the AS year because all this was going on (She wasn't so nice to me early into this) but I'm on the A2's for everything from last year, taking resits in January which hopefully will go well.

 

[Messypandas]

This is the thing, I need the film cameras to pass one of the courses I'm on. A2 photography. I'm on my last year.

My first two years of college were a bust, doing this art and design course I was no good at. A National Diploma dealing with graphics, textiles, multimedia and 3D woodwork. I was really good at two of those, and really shit at the other two. Visual studies, I rocked, along with contextual. But that wasn't enough to pass. I utterly convinced myself I was a failure then and I almost messed up the AS year because all this was going on (She wasn't so nice to me early into this) but I'm on the A2's for everything from last year, taking resits in January which hopefully will go well.

how many hours a week is college course?

 

[zoku88]

college is university in the USA

Technically, it's not.

You'll notice, most Universities will contain colleges in them (unless it's a small one, and then it will contain, maybe, several schools and only one or two colleges.)

Most ppl don't pay attn, though.

 

[OgTheClever]

If you have no previous full level 3 qualifications (2 A Levels or more) then you should be eligible for ALG, which is £30 a week. Doesn't solve your housing problem but at least you'll have some money coming in.

 

[TheRagnCajun]

Where abouts in the UK are you? I'll put you up a for a few days mate, if you need somewhere to stay to sort things out.

A NEW HERO APPEARS

 

[evil solrac v3.0]

what about an aunt or uncle? i mean, i know brits have to have a stiff uopper lip and all but this is ridiculous.

 

[C.Dark.DN]

Technically, it's not.

You'll notice, most Universities will contain colleges in them (unless it's a small one, and then it will contain, maybe, several schools and only one or two colleges.)

Most ppl don't pay attn, though.

College is commonly used as the general concept of higher education in America in addition to your definition.

There's no "people use it wrong" to it. The usage is accepted.

 

[charsace]

If I was you I would cut ties with everyone that turned you down in your time of need. You don't need friends and family if they are so shitty.

 

[Jocchan]

If I was you I would cut ties with everyone that turned you down in your time of need. You don't need friends and family if they are so shitty.

True.

 

[taranatar]

Where bouts are you based? If you were anywhere near mine i'd let you stay round mine till you got yourself sorted.

 

[Ranger X]

I think it's very sad and fucking selfish of a mother to do this to his son.

And she told you she have a heart? :lol --> looks like she also think you're gullible/stupid too.

.

 

[RefigeKru]

how many hours a week is college course?

14.5 hours. I've been trying to get a part time job for ages now, people tell me it's easy to get one as a christmas temp but so far I've had no luck in that area.

To clear stuff up, this is why I'm getting kicked out, and why my brother and sister got kicked out.

Back in April I had a little house gathering of about 10 people. Basically, all we did was drink, play games and listen to music before passing out (I passed out in the toilet, good stuff). The next day we cleaned up and everything was fine, I asked my mum if I could have another one while she went to Spain in May and she said it was fine.

Before leaving she phoned me and told me to get permission from her husband. Thing is, as soon as she left (she was gone for a week), we didn't see him for about 5 days. He's already been caught cheating twice and is complete scum, basically. So my brother and sister told me I should do it anyway since they were going to be on the 3rd floor of our house and the last time we did it they weren't bothered at all. We're basically just jamming, playing Halo and having fun.

Unfortunately for me, the day we did it, is the day he decided to stroll back from his illicit affairs. Argument kicks off, he threatens to hit some of my friends and break my friend's xbox, shuts off the electricity and plans to call the police on us as well as physically threaten my sister. We just leave, my brother lets us stay as his flat for the night and we play singstar all night. I go back, no sign of him so I just assume he went out.

About 3 days later my mum comes back from her holiday, me and my sister are playing RE5 in the living room, my mum goes upstairs and doesn't come down for like 2 hours. Comes down crying, tells us she wants us out by the end of the week, makes my sister cry, etc. Her husband packed all his shit and left. (They're still in contact now, I see him here for a day every now and again.)

She was being megafuckingcrazy then, locked in her room shouting shit at us as we walked past, saying we were plotting to kill her, stifling our housing applications, etc. Her reasoning for this was because she said that if her husband was gone, she wasn't going to be able to pay rent (something she's managed for a loooong time since my sis/bro left) even though they would have helped out. They both left and I've been stuck with her since.

I'm the least liked child anyway. ^^;

It's like he was born with shitty people, then chose more shitty people to spend time with.

It's not that. I'm just not very popular for one, only have a small group of close friends and it's not them, it's their parents who wouldn't allow it.

 

[louis89]

Where abouts in the UK are you? I'll put you up a for a few days mate, if you need somewhere to stay to sort things out.

Go with this guy, he might even let you star in his porn movies.

 

[Drkirby]

college is university in the USA

There is still a slight difference. Universities have research labs, collages don't.

Aren't your parents legally obligated to take care, at least financially, of you until you're 21?

No clue about UK laws, but in the US isn't only till you are 18?

 

[Spider from Mars]

Go with this guy, he might even let you star in his porn movies.

A place to stay and you can sell internet porno's.

Spoiler

Shitty situation homie, best of luck

 

[C.Dark.DN]

There is still a slight difference. Universities have research labs, collages don't.

disregarding the differences, college is also used as the general concept of higher education

 

[iNancy]

Get a credit card. Take out student loans. There are few situations in which I'd recommend borrowing, and this is one of them.

I don't recommend a credit card unless it's your very last resort. You could fall into trouble with the credit card.

 

[AlphaSnake]

Hoping for a good resolution. Let's see some London GAFers help a brotha out. =)

 

[Syph]

I just don't understand why your brother or sister doesn't let you live with them since they know how bad the situation is. And you have a terrible mother, choosing a 'stranger' before her own kids.

 

[andycapps]

Good luck, man. Hopefully some GAFfers in your area can put you up until you're able to find a job, roommate's, and an apartment. Also, like others, I think it's pretty horrible that your family would be so selfish as to force you to live on the street rather than put you up for a bit. Or at least let you stay there for a week or so and then stay with someone else.

 

[C.Dark.DN]

I just don't understand why your brother or sister doesn't let you live with them since they know how bad the situation is. And you have a terrible mother, choosing a 'stranger' before her own kids.

i don't get it either. elaborate on your brother and sister in london OP.

 

[Lagspike_exe]

14.5 hours. I've been trying to get a part time job for ages now, people tell me it's easy to get one as a christmas temp but so far I've had no luck in that area.

To clear stuff up, this is why I'm getting kicked out, and why my brother and sister got kicked out.

Back in April I had a little house gathering of about 10 people. Basically, all we did was drink, play games and listen to music before passing out (I passed out in the toilet, good stuff). The next day we cleaned up and everything was fine, I asked my mum if I could have another one while she went to Spain in May and she said it was fine.

Before leaving she phoned me and told me to get permission from her husband. Thing is, as soon as she left (she was gone for a week), we didn't see him for about 5 days. He's already been caught cheating twice and is complete scum, basically. So my brother and sister told me I should do it anyway since they were going to be on the 3rd floor of our house and the last time we did it they weren't bothered at all. We're basically just jamming, playing Halo and having fun.

Unfortunately for me, the day we did it, is the day he decided to stroll back from his illicit affairs. Argument kicks off, he threatens to hit some of my friends and break my friend's xbox, shuts off the electricity and plans to call the police on us as well as physically threaten my sister. We just leave, my brother lets us stay as his flat for the night and we play singstar all night. I go back, no sign of him so I just assume he went out.

About 3 days later my mum comes back from her holiday, me and my sister are playing RE5 in the living room, my mum goes upstairs and doesn't come down for like 2 hours. Comes down crying, tells us she wants us out by the end of the week, makes my sister cry, etc. Her husband packed all his shit and left. (They're still in contact now, I see him here for a day every now and again.)

She was being megafuckingcrazy then, locked in her room shouting shit at us as we walked past, saying we were plotting to kill her, stifling our housing applications, etc. Her reasoning for this was because she said that if her husband was gone, she wasn't going to be able to pay rent (something she's managed for a loooong time since my sis/bro left) even though they would have helped out. They both left and I've been stuck with her since.

SMH.

 

[ianswoody]

A NEW HERO APPEARS

Wispy is already a GAF hero!

 

[RefigeKru]

I'm in South East London, nearby London Bridge.

And Ranger, I most definitely do not believe anything she says. In fact, as soon as I found a place of my own I intended to do away with family.

The funny thing is, she phoned my father and tried to offload me on him when shit when pearshaped. When he said no she said, and I quote "You've lost a son because of this, I hope you realize this. He'll never want to speak to you again". She told me this and I just find it hilarious that she couldn't see what she just said.

I never really thought about it but it does truly suck that I'm unwanted by both my parents and all those around me.

 

[Messypandas]

14.5 hours. I've been trying to get a part time job for ages now, people tell me it's easy to get one as a christmas temp but so far I've had no luck in that area.

Ok. You'll be entitled for EMA, its not much but its a start and thats about £30 a week. You may also be entitled to JSA. They usually let you claim if you on a course under 12 hours a week (even though its for people out of work) but they make exceptions in cases of estrangement leading to extreme hardship. If they say you are not elligble, i would try asking your course for perhaps some time off or take a gap year until you are sorted. Hopefully you won't need this if you can get a job and get yourself sorted out. And your mothers husband sounds a royal cunt, no offense

 

[Drkirby]

disregarding the differences, college is also used as the general concept of higher education

It is, which is why we need to start using the term "Post secondary school" more.

 

[Vinci]

This is the thing, I need the film cameras to pass one of the courses I'm on. A2 photography. I'm on my last year.

You really need to talk to your university, man. Write a letter to the President, Dean, whatever the hell you guys have over there, and see if he'll take pity on your situation and help you out somehow. Provide you with a place to stay in exchange for some sort of on-campus job. Something. This is bullshit that nobody is willing or in a position to help you.

It's not that. I'm just not very popular for one, only have a small group of close friends and it's not them, it's their parents who wouldn't allow it.

Then their parents are assholes. My parents would've let my friends stay with us if things were as shitty as this.

 

[liquid_gears]

No offence, but what kind of parent would literally kick their teenage son out onto the street without at least ensuring they have access to food, shelter and security?

I take it that you receive EMA? I know it's not enough, but it's something...

Defiantly talk to your school, they should have short term procedures that could prop you up for a while.

What about family/friends?

Can nobody put you up for 8 months until you go to uni?

Good luck, dude.

 

[Combichristoffersen]

a royal cunt

sup GAF

Seriously though, sucks to hear about your situation. Hope you'll find a job or somewhere to stay. But why won't your siblings let you crash at their place until things are sorted out?

 

[msv]

He's already been caught cheating twice and is complete scum, basically.

Wat. The moment you found that out you should've been set on ruining that dude. Most of all make your mom realize he's scum and get a divorce.

Argument kicks off, he threatens to hit some of my friends and break my friend's xbox, shuts off the electricity and plans to call the police on us as well as physically threaten my sister.

It's not his home right? You should've called the police on him. Maybe you can still fetch the police on him, just notify them of the child-abuse, home-wrecking and wife beating.

 

[Vinci]

FWIW, whilst figuring things out with your uni, I'd definitely hit Wispy up on his offer.

 

[jdforge]

Reading stories like this makes me realise how thankful I am for having a very stable upbringing. I'm really sorry to hear all this stuff man.

I'm in Ireland, so not much I can do for you from here, but fuck it's like 30 something days to Christmas and this shit just ain't right.

I see it all the time though in legal affairs, mothers signing away all rights to their kids to run off with some new man. Leaving behind toddlers for the thrill of better sex, or a life in the sun - If I had my way I'd fucking shoot them, stone dead. Some people just do not deserve to have children.

I sympathise with you mate I really do, and I hope that GAF, or someone will help you in someway to get your life back on track and find some stability and security.

 

[crazy monkey]

Where is a Heroic Member when you need one?

*pulls down pants*

RIGHT HERE BABY

:lol :lol

 

[OgTheClever]

Ok. You'll be entitled for EMA, its not much but its a start and thats about £30 a week. You may also be entitled to JSA. They usually let you claim if you on a course under 12 hours a week (even though its for people out of work) but they make exceptions in cases of estrangement leading to extreme hardship. If they say you are not elligble, i would try asking your course for perhaps some time off or take a gap year until you are sorted. Hopefully you won't need this if you can get a job and get yourself sorted out. And your mothers husband sounds a royal cunt, no offense

It's ALG (Adult Learning Grant) from age 19 onwards.

 

[ItAintEasyBeinCheesy]

RefugeeKru
Member
(Today, 07:17 AM)
Reply | Quote

Damn, sucks for you. Your mum sounds like a stupid, literally stupid, woman though, tell her thanks for being a door mat then try get her to join a feminist group, it will work in your favour.

 

[Messypandas]

It's ALG (Adult Learning Grant) from age 19 onwards.

My mistake

 

[RefigeKru]

i don't get it either. elaborate on your brother and sister in london OP.

Big family, 3 sisters, 2 brothers.

2 sisters far outside of London. My other sister lives in Tottenham, can barely afford the studio she's in at the moment.

1 brother lives with his girlfriend, doesn't want me there.

Other brother, just doesn't care that much for me I guess, even though I idolize him. I doubt I fit in with his lifestyle, he always has friends around and I don't think he wants me living in his living room. He already made it apparent that I can't live with him.

I've been talking to my tutors about ALG, I sent the application off but nothing so far.

 

[charsace]

Then their parents are assholes. My parents would've let my friends stay with us if things were as shitty as this.

This.

Your friends and their parents or assholes. I had a friend that had a iffy situation and my parents insisted on him staying with us. He stayed with us a week until one of his family members took him in.

You could cut them all off and lose nothing. It's situations like the one you are in where you learn who your real friends and family are. There are rare cases that you wash your hands of someone, but to me you sound like the average college kid. They are all acting like you were just released from prison or something.

These are people you should just forget about because when they need help they will expect you to stick your neck out for them when they wouldn't do the same. You should never forget how they treated you in this serious situation. You could end up on the street right now and if that happens your future is very grim. If none of them seriously help you before you figure out a solution then you should just cut them off.

 

[Jocchan]

Wat. The moment you found that out you should've been set on ruining that dude. Most of all make your mom realize he's scum and get a divorce.

It's not his home right? You should've called the police on him. Maybe you can still fetch the police on him, just notify them of the child-abuse, home-wrecking and wife beating.

Unfortunately, in real life things aren't that easy. The only thing worse than scum is scum that wants revenge and has nothing to lose.

I never really thought about it but it does truly suck that I'm unwanted by both my parents and all those around me.

:/
Try having your friends talk to their parents, at least to let you stay with them on rotation till you find a job.

 

[Tideas]

wait, isn't Britain (and most of Europe) known for having great social services? Aren't you all paying a massive amount of tax for something?

I would think there'll be a huge government support network that will help house homeless ppl and feed them and crap until they get back on their feet?

 

[gamergirly]

Yup

 

[Combichristoffersen]

wait, isn't Britain (and most of Europe) known for having great social services? Aren't you all paying a massive amount of tax for something?

Social services vary from country to country. Not sure how it'd be in the UK, but here OP would probably get some sort of state-funded monetary help, be it a stipend for education or social services monetary help.

 

[Tideas]

Social services vary from country to country. Not sure how it'd be in the UK, but here OP would probably get some sort of state-funded monetary help, be it a stipend for education or social services monetary help.

a quick google search leads me to this page.

http://england.shelter.org.uk/get_advice/homelessness

I assume the OP has done this already and has gone through all teh channels?

 

[Ronok]

You live in London right? Go to your council now, tell them you are about to go homeless. They will fix something up for you. Most likely something shitty, but beggars can't be choosers. If you were pregnant they would also probably hook you up with housing somewhere on the outskirts where no one really wants to live. If it's far from uni, tough shit, housing is far more important. But as you clearly aren't pregnant, options will be more limited I assume.

It's actually pretty easy to get a roof over your head in London as long as you aren't being picky. You won't like the situation most likely, but it will be something. Obviously some people fall through the cracks so to speak, but if you are really proactive about it, you can get out of a shitty situation.

I haven't read past the first post yet so don't know if things have picked up, but this is some advice from me to you....

I have just realised however that I'm speaking of my knowledge of Camden, rather then all boroughs, so you might be in a far worse position. Maybe you're borough has far less options then the overcrowded shit hole that is here.

 

[liquid_gears]

This.

Your friends and their parents or assholes. I had a friend that had a iffy situation and my parents insisted on him staying with us. He stayed with us a week until one of his family members took him in.

You could cut them all off and lose nothing. It's situations like the one you are in where you learn who your real friends and family are. There are rare cases that you wash your hands of someone, but to me you sound like the average college kid. They are all acting like you were just released from prison or something.

These are people you should just forget about because when they need help they will expect you to stick your neck out for them when they wouldn't do the same. You should never forget how they treated you in this serious situation. You could end up on the street right now and if that happens your future is very grim. If none of them seriously help you before you figure out a solution then you should just cut them off.

Good post. Sums up my thoughts too.

EDIT: Fuck, I actually knew a kid in almost the exact same situation that OP is in now. His mother kicked him out when he was in sixth-form and one of his tutors took him in for a week while he sorted somthing out :lol

Local Government should provide you with a roof over your head. ALG/EMA should at least cover food. I don't think that you can get emergency loans if you aren't in HE. Just continue to fire off your CV to as many places as possible.

 

[RefigeKru]

Wat. The moment you found that out you should've been set on ruining that dude. Most of all make your mom realize he's scum and get a divorce.


It's not his home right? You should've called the police on him. Maybe you can still fetch the police on him, just notify them of the child-abuse, home-wrecking and wife beating.

I've posted so much in this thread but we all did. Constant reminders, none of us got on with him, we all told her to leave him but she's so pathetic. He was an immigrant and he got his stay by marrying her, thing is -- she was so desperate to get married that she accepted his proposal over the phone (He was in London, he just wasn't bothered to do it in person). I always thought that him doing this was either his oppurtunity to get away from her, or get us away from them so he'll be uncontested.

I remember, he wanted a kid but my mother can't have any so I heard the story that he was going to go back to Jamaica to fuck his ex-wife to get a child and spend 6 months in London and 6 in Jamaica. I heard my mum was just considering it but as it turns out it actually happened, I learned this like a month back.

Even now, she'd just tell us to respect her choice and be civil because she loves him.

Anyway, to make things clear. I've always been the quiet child, did well in Primary+Secondary, never been in trouble, never did anything but never got anything either. I remember posting this before but I know I'm the least favourite because at christmas she had presents for everyone and they all said "Love from Mum xxx" with the favourite child having the most kisses and best wrapping/most presents, but I only got one present and it said "From Mum".

Gotta say, that broke my heart more than all of this.

 

[Combichristoffersen]

I've posted so much in this thread but we all did. Constant reminders, none of us got on with him, we all told her to leave him but she's so pathetic. He was an immigrant and he got his stay by marrying her, thing is -- she was so desperate to get married that she accepted his proposal over the phone (He was in London, he just wasn't bothered to do it in person). I always thought that him doing this was either his oppurtunity to get away from her, or get us away from them so he'll be uncontested.

I remember, he wanted a kid but my mother can't have any so I heard the story that he was going to go back to Jamaica to fuck his ex-wife to get a child and spend 6 months in London and 6 in Jamaica. I heard my mum was just considering it but as it turns out it actually happened, I learned this like a month back.

Even now, she'd just tell us to respect her choice and be civil because she loves him.

Anyway, to make things clear. I've always been the quiet child, did well in Primary+Secondary, never been in trouble, never did anything but never got anything either. I remember posting this before but I know I'm the least favourite because at christmas she had presents for everyone and they all said "Love from Mum xxx" with the favourite child having the most kisses and best wrapping/most presents, but I only got one present and it said "From Mum".

Gotta say, that broke my heart more than all of this.

Jesus, man. Just.. wow. Your mom really does sound like a major cunt. I feel bad for you, I really do

 

[neojubei]

When your parents get old and they will; you know sure enough they will want you to take care of them. Things will turn up for you and down for your parents soon enough. If I lived in the UK I'd let you stay on my couch and help you find a place and a job.

 

[Ronok]

Refigekru, are you in the borough of Southwark?

 

[RefigeKru]

Refigekru, are you in the borough of Southwark?

Yeah, how did you know?

Btw, the very first thing I did was go to the Southwark housing. They're the ones helping me out, I'm on some scheme that pays the deposit for me in a place I find and housing benefit would pay the rent.

Unfortunately they ran out of cash for a deposit. That's the real kicker in this situation.