• Hey Guest. Check out your NeoGAF Wrapped 2025 results here!

JOHN CARTER (OF MARS!) |OT| (dir. Andrew Stanton)

Status
Not open for further replies.
jett said:
kbvL0.png


Yes, yes you can has!
Click to expand...

Cracks me up every time.
 
Lionel Mandrake said:
Paid matinee price and still felt like I overpaid. I don't know if it was Stanton, or the studio, but this didn't work. Maybe if I was more familiar with the source material I'd feel different.
Click to expand...
I doubt it.

You would probably have known what you were getting yourself into and maybe you would have chosen not to see it. If PoM suffers from anything, it's
the lack of any significant, long term enemies or rivals for JC, although I'm not sure that the movie did a great job addressing this.
.

Probably should add a little bit more about PoM. PoM covers a lot of stuff like the 9th ray and Barsoomian culture (or the lack thereof), but the paragraphs that explain and describe the 8th ray and Barsoomian customs are satire or at least, very tongue in cheek.
 
Scullibundo said:
Naw. I still think the design of the Tharks could have been pulled off much better. You could insert them into Wall-E without anybody blinking an eye. They look cartoony. Very good CGI, but it doesn't look realistic like the Na'vi.

I love the Tharks, but I don't think they look believable.
Click to expand...

Agreed completely. They have a charm, and are technically impressive, but looks very cartoony. I eventually got over it, and it didn't hurt my enjoyment of the movie, but I do wish the art direction with the film was stronger.

So what are the chances of this film doing ok in the Box Office by positive word of mouth? The people I know who actually saw the film ended up liking it, and I know, like me, they have been trying to tell others to see it.
 
Xplatformer said:
Movie felt rushed.

By the point of John, the Princess and the alien daughter walking through the desert I was already kinda bored.

Not a bad movie...just lacked any real depth at all.

Oh, and the relationship between John Carter and the princess...
1) happened too quickly
2) wasn't believable

I missed the last 30 minutes because I wanted to catch the end of the Laker game, but what I saw was pretty average.
Click to expand...

I couldn't believe it when
he decided to marry her at the end. They've only known each other for a few days.
 
This movie should have been marketed as a big sci-fi Ben Hur style epic from the beginning and should have just been called Princess of Mars or John Carter of Mars. I don't know why Disney had to fuck with it so much
 
_Isaac said:
I couldn't believe it when
he decided to marry her at the end. They've only known each other for a few days.
Click to expand...

This is Barsoom, motherfucker. Forget your Earth courting customs!

Stanton already spoke about how they're only getting to know each other now and that the next movie (lol) would have them actually dealing with the relationship issues that come up from marriage.

John! You said you were going to take that fucking chode for a walk two days ago! He's getting frisky and humping all the furniture into cinders.
Oh, well excuse me Princess! At least he's getting some goddamn action around here. I'll take him tomorrow morning. Fuck knows I'm not going to go halfway across this shitty dessert for his walk, just so I can carry his slobbering ass back after nightfall.
 
Scullibundo said:
This is Barsoom, motherfucker. Forget your Earth courting customs!

Stanton already spoke about how they're only getting to know each other now and that the next movie (lol) would have them actually dealing with the relationship issues that come up from marriage.

John! You said you were going to take that fucking chode for a walk two days ago! He's getting frisky and humping all the furniture into cinders.
Oh, well excuse me Princess! At least he's getting some goddamn action around here. I'll take him tomorrow morning. Fuck knows I'm not going to go halfway across this shitty dessert for his walk, just so I can carry his slobbering ass back after nightfall.
Click to expand...
Sounds like a good set-up for a comic book series tie-in.
 
Wow - just got back from an Imax showing. As someone who grew up on these books and has read through all of the Mars series several times I cannot tell you how much of a fucking abortion this movie is. The source material, especially for the first movie, is great. It may have been a little slower (and more thoughtful, I might add) but this piece of shit in the theaters is like Edgar Rice Burroughs birthed the bastard love child version of Michael Bay and John Carter. I mean the writers quite literally lifted the names and places from Burroughs' work and just wrote up whatever shit story they felt like. That's what you see on the screen. Woola, the damn dog for God's sake, was probably the most faithful to the original story.

I really, really wanted to see
Tars Tarkas ascend to Jeddak over Tal Hajus...NOT fucking find out that he challenged Hajus and then lost. What a pussy they made him!!

Sorry, I know I just sound like a classic "the movie is nowhere near as good as the book" rant, but I went in with very low expectations and there were entirely unmet.
 
Disney has had better times.

You mean to tell me for the first time in Hollywood history (well maybe the second - but even he was just the director) a studio let a animator have the final say?

That dont happen...any first time director WISHES he had the leeway Stanton got. They dreamed of it.

Disney would have been better off giving this to Touchstone - that was the movies only major and fatal mistake.
 
I remember when Robert Rodriquez was going to direct this movie back in 2005. I bet his version would have been far superior. He even said he wanted to use the original artwork as a design template.
 
Anticitizen One said:
I remember when Robert Rodriquez was going to direct this movie back in 2005. I bet his version would have been far superior. He even said he wanted to use the original artwork as a design template.
Click to expand...

FUCK no. Rodriguez hasn't made a good movie since Sin City. You just know it would look like that cheap Spy Kids shit.

Shit, maybe The Wachowskis would have been the best option.
 
Scullibundo said:
FUCK no. Rodriguez hasn't made a good movie since Sin City. You just know it would look like that cheap Spy Kids shit.

Shit, maybe The Wachowskis would have been the best option.
Click to expand...

Rodirguez wouldnt have gotten off the ground - his infuence with the lucha-movie style dont work.

I think that the Wachowski's would have made some money but fell flat in the end.

The right move was get it out of Disney's hands and let the Cohen Brothers take a crack at it with Weta's model studio.
 
adamsappel said:
The flashbacks made that scene. Why do you think them needless? He was giving up everything to fight those Tharks, and those scenes underscored all that he had lost.
Click to expand...

The flashbacks were awful. Awful, awful, awful. I'm the kind of person that appreciates that sort of thing, but the execution of them in this movie was wayyyyy off.
 
Rodriguez, lol wut. I really like him and I would not want him to make this movie, even in his own style.

Cheech Marin probably woulda played McNulty and Mark Strong, lol.
 
It must have just happened. I was chuckling at the igloo thread and that was likely the cause. I guess it broke some kind of TOS?
 
Regarding the design of the Tharks: I kind of thought they weren't outlandish enough. In many aspects they matched the source material, but here's a bit from the book's initial description, with some features not found: "six legs, or as I afterward learned, two legs and two arms, with an intermediary pair of limbs which could be used at will either as arms or legs. Their eyes were set at the extreme sides of their heads a trifle above the center and protruded in such a manner that they could be directed either forward or back and also independently of each other, thus permitting this queer animal to look in any direction, or in any two directions at once, without the necessity of turning the head."
 
Stallion Free said:
Aww now we have to wait for his actual impressions of the film.
Click to expand...

Watched it yesterday. It was cluster fuck. Had no idea who the was fighting whom. Characters were not established properly. The good part where he landed and 5 minute before ending. That is it. I hated avatar but at least I knew blue people were fighting other people. In one of the big fighting scene i did not knew what the hell was going on and who was who. Save your money. Watch it on Netflix when it comes out.
 
Wow, all the GAF hype over the soundtrack was spot on. Listening to it on Youtube and it's seriously one of the best soundtracks I've heard in years.

This will never get an Oscar nod, but you never know.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Similar threads

ALEXANDRA DADDARIO SPLITSVILLE WITH ANDREW FORM ... Files For Divorce
32
663
DeepEnigma replied
Prince Andrew: "We'll play some more soon"
2
64
2K
calistan replied
Life on Mars?
21
820
ForAcademicPurposes replied
Oscars 2026 |OT|
2 3
149
2K
DKehoe replied
John Woo nearly blew up Chow Yun Fat with dynamite during the production of Hard Boiled
15
344
nush replied
Top Bottom