Support NeoGAF

[NervousXtian]

So, this is a local news story as of late.. apparently someone is leaving flyers on doors of business in the North Williams area of Portland, OR. This is a highly gentrified area of Portland that has recently seeing more and more new shops and restaurants being put in.

The flyer:

Personally, I think it's a pretty stupid troll job by a couple teens.. but then again.. Juggalos.

Story here. And a more news type version here.

Excerpts:

Spencer Kollman, manager of the Hopworks Urban Brewery, and recipient of some of the obscene fliers told KOIN, “So I don’t know what we did to make them angry or anybody else to make them angry. This is straight up vulgar.”

Kollman also told local media about a rise in car break-ins in the neighborhood, however, authorities were not willing to confirm a link between the break-ins and the fliers.

“There’s broken glass everyday,” he told KOIN.

Hopefully, the Juggalos and the local business owners can reach some kind of truce before the streets run red with Faygo.

EDIT: THEY BETTER NOT FUCK WITH TASTY & SONS. They will have a war on their hands and the shakshuka will be spilled.

 

[Akahige]

What a bunch of clowns.

 

[Seth C]

This is going to be hilarious. I suspect 10-12 clowns are going to end up in jail.

 

[Omegasquash]

Kids are clowning around up there.

 

[Piston Hyundai]

"please take us seriously"

"woop woop"

 

[Omegasquash]

"please take us seriously"

"woop woop"

*sips Faygo

 

[depths20XX]

Vacate or ____ our ____.

become our friends?

 

[terrisus]

The heck's a "Juggalo?"

 

[djplaeskool]

Leave a weekly pittance of Faygo at the door.

 

[Kwixotik]

Vacate or _ our _?

 

[Verano]

The heck's a "Juggalo?"

A hipster in the south

 

[Siegcram]

Nothing more menacing than adults in clown makeup.

 

[terrisus]

A hipster in the south

Portland's in the south now? >.>

 

[HylianTom]

Leave a weekly pittance of Faygo at the door.

Do they accept Schweppes or Nantucket Nectar by any chance?

 

[NervousXtian]

Portland's in the south now? >.>

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Juggalo

Basically super fans of the Insane Clown Posse.

Which is a hip-hop group from Detroit of 2 dudes who wear clown makeup.

 

[studyguy]

Businesses, how do they work?

 

[NervousXtian]

Do they accept Schweppes or Nantucket Nectar by any chance?

The way we can tell if they are actual Juggalos:

Leave out a bottle of Honest Tea (unsweetened) and a Red Pop Faygo.

If the Honest Tea disappears, we know this is all a prank.



FULL DISCLOSURE: I have a weakness for Red Pop Faygo.. it's like liquid red vines of deliciousness followed by disappointment and self-doubt.

 

[Jarrod38]

I keep forgetting the new location of The Gathering is only 20 miles from me. I wanted to go this year but was afraid to catch the Bubonic plague.

 

[Sub_Level]

And then watch as someone like actually gets their head chopped off and body hung and they turn out to be a serious threat to the community lol

 

[John Kowalski]

Vacate or _ our _?

I think i know who did it...

 

[sixteen-bit]

Portland's in the south now? >.>

maybe they meant south portland

 

[Bobby Roberts]

I'm less worried about the fact there are Juggalos who know how to use a printer in North Portland than I am the fact Nervous Xtian lives here.

Shit.

 

[NervousXtian]

I'm less worried about the fact there are Juggalos who know how to use a printer in North Portland than I am the fact Nervous Xtian lives here.

Shit.

That's exactly the kind of thing a Juggalo might say to divert attention from themselves onto a local Portlander who despite thinking HUB:BIKEBAR is way too hipster to defend but that same drive has What's the Scoop? and T&S's.. so I'm taking up the anti-Juggalo flyer cause.

I mean, seriously.. have you had the shakshuka? always add the sausage.

 

[dr3upmushroom]

Yo I went in there wanting to buy some ma'ffuging Faygo, ma'fuggas didn't have any. Yo fuck dat shit, we should kick these ma'fuggas out of town.

 

[cubicle47b]

Juggalos live in Portland *and* care about gentrification?

 

[PlayALLtheGames]

Vacate or blank our blank? Wut. Suck our dicks?

Reminds me of the trumpet skeltan.

"You have been targeted by the Spooky Clown Juggalo Famly. Vacate or Spooky Clown Juggalos will eat u."

 

[Technosteve]

is this about magnets in restaurant management?

.... i got nothing

 

[poppabk]

Vacate or blank our blank? Wut. Suck our dicks?

Reminds me of the trumpet skeltan.

"You have been targeted by the Spooky Clown Juggalo Famly. Vacate or Spooky Clown Juggalos will eat u."

We will tell our mom

 

[Stormhammer]

they didn't accept the jokers cards as payment

 

[Air Zombie Meat]

Time to install some magnetic locks.

 

[Sobriquet]

There are Juggalos in Portland? I can't be the only one that's surprised.

 

[Bobby Roberts]

There are Juggalos in Portland? I can't be the only one that's surprised.

They spawn at the Gateway Transit Center behind the Halsey Fred Meyer.

I'm not kidding. That's their spawn point.

Which means if they get caught in North Portland that's a LONG way to have to go just to pick up whatever loot you dropped - IF another Juggalo hadn't already scooped it.

 

[Rapstah]

“There’s broken glass everyday,” he told KOIN.

Coincidentally, the suspects smoke broken glass everyday.

 

[JCX]

Man even the juggalos don't want to stay in Michigan anymore.

 

[Troubled Bat]

Juggalos still exist?

 

[NervousXtian]

They spawn at the Gateway Transit Center behind the Halsey Fred Meyer.

I'm not kidding. That's their spawn point.

Which means if they get caught in North Portland that's a LONG way to have to go just to pick up whatever loot you dropped - IF another Juggalo hadn't already scooped it.

I'm pretty sure the Gateway Transit Center is also a Gateway to Hell.

They might just be mad about Dalo's being forced to close to make way for mixed use space. I know personally I was pretty pissed. Bete-Lukas is better, but that shit's out on 50th. That's a long bus ride for a Juggalo.. and it's not on the Max line.

Also, anyone seen Timedog lately.. he might know what's up with this scourge defacing our establishments.

Someone put out the Timedog signal.

 

[Dead]

I've never seen Faygo in a store before. Is it a regional thing?

 

[PuppetSlave]

What about local gangs/criminals, couldn't this really backfire on these brave new criminals?

 

[AlexBasch]

My life hasn't being the same after knowing what Juggalos are.

After watching the Juggalo Woodstock or whatever they call their yearly meetings, I fear for the businesses buildings.

 

[lawlohwhat]

Listen everyone, we are fine in Portland and it's no time to panic everything is

 

[kris.]

But Shaggy and Violent J told me that juggalos aren't a gang???

 

[Onion_Relish]

Fucking extortion and protection racket, how does that work?

 

[NervousXtian]

Listen everyone, we are fine in Portland and it's no time to panic everything is

It's probably RoLo playing his reindeer games again.

 

[IDKAboutThat]

What is this feud
Is it a dadaist performance
will the shops retaliate

 

[Lord_Balkan]

Once, someone was telling me about the 'bad' part of Portland, and being from Chicago, I wasn't really amused

 

[Jme]

Vacate or ____ our ____.

become our friends?

Vacate or _ our _?

the image url included the word "-redacted" so i removed that and it gave this version:

 

[Sho_Nuff82]

Yeah, I figured the three words were "Fuck", "Suck", and "Dicks".

 

[kitchenmotors]

Juggalos still exist?

Yep, haha.

Joe Goes to Gathering of the Juggalos 2014

 

[Shmuppers]

I almost don't want to ask, but what's Faygo?

 

[stufte]

the image url included the word "-redacted" so i removed that and it gave this version:

So fellatio is their threat? Scurr'd.