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Julian Assange is a Douchebag.

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ChiTownBuffalo

Either I made up lies about the Boston Bomber or I fell for someone else's crap. Either way, I have absolutely no credibility and you should never pay any attention to anything I say, no matter what the context. Perm me if I claim to be an insider
Wikileaks aside and whatever. This isn't political. The man is just an incredibly huge douchebag.

Verified OKCupid Profile

Douchey Online Diary Excerpts

Sat 24 Jun 2006 : Canberra
I ended up at a backpackers filled with some of the 900 Christians from the Australian University Christian Convergence. Most were young women and I turned, somewhat disgracefully, into a sort of Chesterton's Hardy, the village atheist, brooding and blaspheming over the village idiot, while they, for their part, tried to convert me with the rise and fall their bosoms.

One of the devout was the lovely daughter of a New Castle minister. At some point in my unintended wooing of her, she looked up, fluttered her eyelids and said 'Oh, you know so much! I hardly know anything!'. 'That is why you believe in God," I explained. This conversational brutality took her breath away and she swooned. I was exactly what she secretly longed for; a man willing to openly disagree with her father. All along she had needed a man to devote herself to. All along she had failed to find a man worthy of being called a man, failed to find a man who would not bow to gods, so she had chosen a god unworthy of being called a god, but who would not bow to a man.

Thu 29 Jun 2006 : Krill to the baleen of the feminine

I've always found women caught in a thunderstorm appealing. Perhaps it is a male universal, for without advertising this proclivity a lovely girl I knew, but not well, on discovering within herself lascivious thoughts about me and noticing raindrops outside her windows, stood for a moment fully clothed in her shower before letting the wind and rain buffet her body as she made her tremulous approach to my door and of course I could not turn her away.

But then, just when one might suspect that men are krill to the baleen of female romantic manipulation, I found myself loving a girl who was a coffee addict. I would make a watery paste of finely ground coffee and surreptitiously smear this around my neck and shoulders before seducing her so she would associate my body with her dopaminergic cravings. But every association relates two objects both ways. She started drinking more and more coffee. Sometimes I looked at her cups of liquid arabicia with envious eyes for if there were four cups then somehow, I was one of them, or a quarter of everyone one of them...

*shudder* So creepy/douchey
 
:lol

this thread is gonna be sweet

All along she had needed a man to devote herself to. All along she had failed to find a man worthy of being called a man, failed to find a man who would not bow to gods, so she had chosen a god unworthy of being called a god, but who would not bow to a man.
:lol
 
i think it is clear that op is jealous by that fact that assange just bangs so many women and doesn't give a shit. in some ways, the ops hatred is infact envy.
 
Jenga said:
:lol

this thread is gonna be sweet

I know. I'm curious to see if people are going to remain rational enough to seperate the politcal from personal.
 
mAcOdIn said:
We all knew he was a douche, I thought that was a given.

Either way, if he is a douchebag (and he probably is) the examples listed in the OP is not why he is a douchebag.
 
Chinner said:
i think it is clear that op is jealous by that fact that assange just bangs so many women and doesn't give a shit. in some ways, the ops hatred is infact envy.
Without a top hat even...
 
Over 20 atheist-gaf members have fapped to the first story so far, and the thread has only been up for 5 minutes
 
shuri said:
Over 20 atheist-gaf members have fapped to the first story so far, and the thread has only been up for 5 minutes
i bet Assange writes atheist erotica

also, this thread is nothing without fortified_concept's indignant and deeply personal offense at this thread
 
MvGvE.jpg
 
jorma said:
Either way, if he is a douchebag (and he probably is) the examples listed in the OP is not why he is a douchebag.
They are good examples, it's the lame way he writes that proves he's a douche as most well written people are douches.

Not that I disagree with his lame characterization of the girl in the first example, if she is as he describes there's no reason to paint her in a nice light.

Not that I think it matters as about 75% of GAF are probably also douches, myself included, ok not probably in my case.
 
hey gaf i know you're gonna hate, but this def sounds like the diary of someone who would have sex with a girl and not tell her he didn't use a condom

please direct all complaints to my PM box
 
:lol :lol Still love what the guys does and rooting for him now, but I have no problem saying that the guy definitely comes across as (and may very well be) a fucking weirdo :lol
 
His descriptions and assertions are well founded psychologically. Whether you like the phrasing and air of superiority is another matter.
 
All along she had needed a man to devote herself to. All along she had failed to find a man worthy of being called a man, failed to find a man who would not bow to gods, so she had chosen a god unworthy of being called a god, but who would not bow to a man.


:lol
 
mAcOdIn said:
They are good examples, it's the lame way he writes that proves he's a douche as most well written people are douches.

Not that I disagree with his lame characterization of the girl in the first example, if she is as he describes there's no reason to paint her in a nice light.

Not that I think it matters as about 75% of GAF are probably also douches, myself included, ok not probably in my case.

It's probably a linguistic difference. If you mean "the sort of hipster douchebag that only buys apple products" yeah, i guess.
I was more thinking of the "dude who fucks a girl while sharing a flat (and fucking) another girl and doing it without using a condom, and then claims he is gonna call while never intending to call" sort of douchebag...
 
Is this going to change a single person's opinion of Assange? People who admire him as a renegade freedom fighter are going to admire him more, and people who think he's a callous egomaniac are going to find their view reaffirmed.

mAcOdIn said:
They are good examples, it's the lame way he writes that proves he's a douche as most well written people are douches.

Not that I disagree with his lame characterization of the girl in the first example, if she is as he describes there's no reason to paint her in a nice light.

Not that I think it matters as about 75% of GAF are probably also douches, myself included, ok not probably in my case.
Yeah, education tends to make people douches, not to mention smug. Elitist too. And pretentious. Also, totally egotistical. It's...it's like they think they're better just cuz they know more than you.
 
I would make a watery paste of finely ground coffee and surreptitiously smear this around my neck and shoulders before seducing her so she would associate my body with her dopaminergic cravings.
I expect this masterful advice to start showing up in girl-age threads shortly
 
human5892 said:
I expect this masterful advice to start showing up in girl-age threads shortly
if assange had posted in girl age at any point before wikileaks he would have been called out for being a creeper

People who admire him as a renegade freedom fighter are going to admire him more
how would being a terrible writer make people appreciate him as a renegade freedom fighter
 
I <3 Memes said:
You Jealous?

2rrwghk.jpg

Nah, I can be a douchebag all fine on my own without smearing coffee grounds on myself.
 
Jenga said:
if assange had posted in girl age at any point before wikileaks he would have been called out for being a creeper

Except Assange is a pimp and clearly wouldn't need to post a girl age.
 
jorma said:
It's probably a linguistic difference. If you mean "the sort of hipster douchebag that only buys apple products" yeah, i guess.
I was more thinking of the "dude who fucks a girl while sharing a flat (and fucking) another girl and doing it without using a condom, and then claims he is gonna call while never intending to call" sort of douchebag...
Well I haven't really made a douchebag hierarchy that I can reference nor am I familiar with a universal hierarchy that we could use to agree on, I just think douchebags are douchebags. Assange always came across as a narcissist and those are usually douchebags, infact I don't think one could be a narcissist without being a douchebag. All douchebaggery is douchebaggery and equally morally and intellectually deplorable but only some douchebaggery is illegal. Truthfully, I just like throwing the word douche out there because of the way my spell checker handles the word. Douche. D-O-U-C-H-E, hmm, not the same with dashes. Anyways, yeah, he's a douche, so what?

And I do think most of Gaf, male gaf at least, are also douches in this regard, what, when we have such high class threads such as "Does thou tap the booty" and the like we are either already or at least entertain the idea of being douchebags. Big deal. Being a douche isn't illegal so it's not that big of an insult and like I said, I also think I'm a douche, just not the same way Assange is.

Monocle is also right, although I enjoy how he aimed it at me instead of using a generic term like "the masses" but the statement's more or less correct. The smarter a person is the more likely they're no longer going to have the patience to deal with people not as smart, thus, they're douches.
 
I always kind of thought he was a douche based on the chat logs that were released by some of his former colleagues at Wikileaks. This is just more evidence of someone that desperately wants to be loved.

He's just a smart guy with daddy issues.

mAcOdIn said:
Monocle is also right, although I enjoy how he aimed it at me instead of using a generic term like "the masses" but the statement's more or less correct. The smarter a person is the more likely they're no longer going to have the patience to deal with people not as smart, thus, they're douches.


Or it's just used as defense mechanism to mask their inability to socialize. Depends on your perspective.
 
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