• Hey Guest. Check out your NeoGAF Wrapped 2025 results here!

Manly GAF: How do I Fight?

Status
Not open for further replies.
Throw the jab to keep him at bay. Then feint and throw a straight right to the chin. Guaranteed K.O. oh and keep your hands up!

Good luck! :D
 
The Abominable Snowman said:
I dont have quite long nails, but when making a fist my nails dig into my palm. Wouldnt this hurt when (if) i land a punch and my nails cut my skin on my palm?
Click to expand...

I am sure the pain of your jaw cracking will over ride the sensation of nails cutting into your palms.
 
The Abominable Snowman said:
I dont have quite long nails, but when making a fist my nails dig into my palm. Wouldnt this hurt when (if) i land a punch and my nails cut my skin on my palm?
Click to expand...
You are thinking way too hard about this. You will be numb. Adrenaline is an amazing thing.

Edit: Also, if you are hell bent on doing this, I would recommend taking a shit before you step out there. Your body may go into fight or flight.
 
JasonMCG said:
Play Street Fighter and remember some of the moves.

One piece of real advice: Don't clutch your thumb when throwing a punch - you can break it that way. Also, throw punches with your body, not just your arm (ie. turn your body as you throw). You'll get more power that way.
Click to expand...

Last part is not good advice. If you're actually throwing a fist that way and you do it right, you can break your hand on their face.

Though I doubt this guy can actually conjure the energy to do that.
 
Keep your hands up. Keep your feet moving. Play defense. Wait for the counter punch. DONT FUCKING MISS. if you knock him down kick him in the ribs (not the head you dont want to kill him).
 
Being manly in this situation is not about letting a fight happen for no good reason, it's going to the party and walking up to him and defusing the situation by clearing up the rumors, gossip, and bullshit and telling the truth. Be calm, diplomatic, and assertive. If he attacks you, he attacks you, you defend yourself as best you can and he goes to jail. You're not going to learn how to fight by posting on NeoGAF.
 
Hit balls, eyes, and bite if you have too. Maybe use a weapon laying around.

I can't wait for updates to this thread. You better deliver OP.
 
Rocky V, street fight scene, taunt the fool to no end!


Fisticuffs said:
Keep your hands up. Keep your feet moving. Play defense. Wait for the counter punch. DONT FUCKING MISS. if you knock him down kick him in the ribs (not the head you dont want to kill him).
Click to expand...

Twinkle toes!

This thread is fucking hilarious, but I apologize. I know it's serious. Or is it?
 
Fisticuffs said:
Keep your hands up. Keep your feet moving. Play defense. Wait for the counter punch. DONT FUCKING MISS. if you knock him down kick him in the ribs (not the head you dont want to kill him).
Click to expand...
But how can he perform the fatality then?
 
Keep your fists up, always keep your arms in a guarded position, and move around a bit. If you're stationary, you will get destroyed. Don't get too excited when the fighting starts, otherwise you will end up looking like you're trying to bat away bugs or something.

Try to get him off his feet with a tackle at the waist if the opportunity presents itself.
 
EviLore said:
Being manly in this situation is not about letting a fight happen for no good reason, it's going to the party and walking up to him and defusing the situation by clearing up the rumors, gossip, and bullshit and telling the truth. Be calm, diplomatic, and assertive. If he attacks you, he attacks you, you defend yourself as best you can and he goes to jail.
Click to expand...

This is not the post of a man with moral clarity.
 
Just know that fights in real life don't work out the way they do in movies. You or he will probably break bones in your hand from punching improperly or hitting bonier parts of the face.

You want advice? Don't get in the fight. But if you have to, try to break his nose so that not only will the river of blood scare him out of fighting further, but you may throw his breathing off enough that he will lay on the ground in fear of suffocating.
 
I wanted to ask: putting fists up in defensive position is nice and all, but how do you deal with douchebags who grab your shirt with intention to throw you around or lunge at you?
 
For a serious answer, the best way to learn how to fight is to simply take a class on fighting.

Fighting isn't like home improvement or school subjects where you can use Google and Youtube to substitute training. You need face-to-face real-life training and experience.

EviLore said:
Being manly in this situation is not about letting a fight happen for no good reason, it's going to the party and walking up to him and defusing the situation by clearing up the rumors, gossip, and bullshit and telling the truth. Be calm, diplomatic, and assertive. If he attacks you, he attacks you, you defend yourself as best you can and he goes to jail. You're not going to learn how to fight by posting on NeoGAF.
Click to expand...

The best answer. As much as TV and Maxim state the contrary, "being a man" isn't about being a "badass". Its about maturity, wisdom, experience, and taking care of you and your loved ones.
 
RustyNails said:
I wanted to ask: putting fists up in defensive position is nice and all, but how do you deal with douchebags who grab your shirt with intention to throw you around or lunge at you?
Click to expand...
1. Don't wear a shirt.
2. Grab their shirt and pull it over their head.
3. Smash their car windows.
Flying_Phoenix said:
For a serious answer, the best way to learn how to fight is to simply take a class on fighting.
Click to expand...
He needs more immediate advice, in which case he should either not go to the party or defuse the situation as others have said.
 
RustyNails said:
I wanted to ask: putting fists up in defensive position is nice and all, but how do you deal with douchebags who grab your shirt with intention to throw you around or lunge at you?
Click to expand...

When Someone grabs my shirt i usually head butt them in the face.
 
Remember, if he shakes his head, he's going to throw a jab. If he crouches, he's going for the uppercut. If he opens his mouth, hit him in the face and then go for the stomach while he tries to pull his pants up.

/Too obvious?
 
Plywood said:
He needs more immediate advice, in which case he should either not go to the party or defuse the situation as others have said.
Click to expand...

Then he's screwed. Being competent in fighting takes months of training. It requires gaining agility, strength, knowledge, precision of techniques, and real-world experience from sparing.

Seriously either clear it up or don't go. Which to decide completely depends on the person.

If bubba is guido hothead then just avoid him. If he is a average joe or a down to earth guy then you can reason.
 
I've gotta agree; the worse thing is getting fucked up in a fight and not knowing what the hell even happened. You're better off settling this before it gets out of hand and someone gets hurt.
 
Flying_Phoenix said:
Then he's screwed. Being competent in fighting takes months of training. It requires gaining agility, strength, knowledge, precision of techniques, and real-world experience from sparing.
Click to expand...

not entirely true. I usually find my opponents are worse at fighting than i am. I have no training, I'm just vicious
 
Firstly: DON'T FUCKING FIGHT. Get out of it. Avoid it at all costs. Because, regardless of how well you fight, you will be hurt. Or worse. Especially in a street fight. They have no rules and they get dirty. So talk the moron out of it. Diffuse the situation. Call the cops or don't even have a party. It is not worth it. At all.

Secondly, you can't learn to fight over night. It takes many months to even know the nuisances. So don't fucking FIGHT.

However, if things escalate and if it becomes inevitable, then you need to learn how to defend yourself. Defense is more important because it gives you time to get help or get away. Learn how to space yourself from attacks. Timing.

And just as important, know how to throw a punch. Most people, in fights, swing wildly, putting their strength only in the arms or using their whole body into the swing, screwing up their balance and leaving them vulnerable. They usually do a haymaker, which is a very stupid thing to do if not timed right. Learning how to punch properly, and having a proper stance (which is defensive while being offensive) will greatly help you get out of a situation.

Here's a video for learning how to punch. It's a boxing stance. :

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B-Zd_RfRrqA

Here's a simple video in how to do a simple take down:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wvIsJ2jcSMY

After getting under the arm, you can uppercut to knock the person out.

But seriously, don't fucking fight.
 
Lot's of terrible advice in this thread.

Most manly way to handle this fight is not to fight at all. Don't go to a party where adrenaline and alcohol will combine resulting in something stupid happening. Diffuse the situation later in a less intense atmosphere.
 
Fisticuffs said:
not entirely true. I usually find my opponents are worse at fighting than i am. I have no training, I'm just viscous
Click to expand...

I can say the same with me as I've had little training and have beaten some of my friends in boxing matches.

But in reality it had nothing to do with me in being "vicious" but more so that my friends were bad at fighting.

Just because you have gotten lucky a few times doesn't mean you're a good fighter.

Fighting is a lot like sex, in which that despite guys always boasting about their skill, a majority of guys aren't any good at it. (Fun Fact: 2/3rds of females have described their partner as being "incompetent" during sex.)

To put it simpler, there's "fighting" and there's fighting.
 
RustyNails said:
I wanted to ask: putting fists up in defensive position is nice and all, but how do you deal with douchebags who grab your shirt with intention to throw you around or lunge at you?
Click to expand...
If your shirt is being grabbed, then you have the opportunity to punch him to get him off.

Really though, if the OP doesn't know how to fight, he needs to stay away from this guy. Fist fight don't solve anything when you're at your age.
 
EviLore said:
Being manly in this situation is not about letting a fight happen for no good reason, it's going to the party and walking up to him and defusing the situation by clearing up the rumors, gossip, and bullshit and telling the truth. Be calm, diplomatic, and assertive.
Click to expand...

Exactly. Fighting (except in self defense) is stupid. Sure some people may think you are weak or a pacifist but it's better to exhausts all peaceful solutions first before risking serious injury to yourself and others by walking in to a fight.
 
If he is a foot taller than you then he probably also weighs around 50 pounds more and a has a much longer reach. Just dont go to the party man.
 
Flying_Phoenix said:
I can say the same with me as I've had little training and have beaten some of my friends in boxing matches.

But in reality it had nothing to do with me in being "vicious" but more so that my friends were bad at fighting.

Just because you have gotten lucky a few times doesn't mean you're a good fighter.

Fighting is a lot like sex, in which that despite guys always boasting about their skill, a majority of guys aren't any good at it.

To put it simpler, there's "fighting" and there's fighting.
Click to expand...
I completely agree with you but there's a difference between sparring with friends and someone that seriously wants to hurt you. There's also the fact that there may be more participants than OP is anticipating. Nothing like getting your ass kicked by 4 guys while your friends stand there and watch too terrified to move.
 
yeah well i feel sorry for you but if your friends are going to be at a party partly thrown for you, im sure you know someone who knows why he thinks you stole his car and was talking shit about him... why this shit happening to you? someone doesnt like you
 
I've never been in a fight and since i had Jaw surgery last year.....RIP if i get punched in the face.

I would have to use my hands to block my face and just have a kick offense B^)


pro tip i think
use your elbows if you knock him to the ground, peoples elbow
 
RiccochetJ said:
I completely agree with you but there's a difference between sparring with friends and someone that seriously wants to hurt you. There's also the fact that there may be more participants than OP is anticipating. Nothing like getting your ass kicked by 4 guys while your friends stand there and watch too terrified to move.
Click to expand...

Exactly which is why the best way to learn how to fight is by taking a class. Even then your point will still stand but you'll undergo how to defend every trick in the book.
 
DurielBlack said:
Lot's of terrible advice in this thread.

Most manly way to handle this fight is not to fight at all. Don't go to a party where adrenaline and alcohol will combine resulting in something stupid happening. Diffuse the situation later in a less intense atmosphere.
Click to expand...

I have to agree here. If you're going to fight and you have no skill in doing so, you're out of your element. Most practitioners of Kung Fu will tell you that the most dangerous opponent is a street fighter, because they are unpredictable and they don't think about consequences.

Your honor -- such as it is -- isn't worth shit if you have no skill to back it up. Sorry, but that's the case. You can't learn this shit on youtube. Even if you could, you don't want to fight; it could take you down a terrible road of legalities and social problems. The best fighter is the kind that knows when it's not a good idea to fight. It starts with the logistics of the scenario, as well as the pyschology of the scenario. You're clearly not ready.

Again, the best course of action is to not go. The second best clourse, is to call the police right off and base it on a noise complaint so you can save face and walk out of the situation with nobody being the wiser.
 
Ultimoo said:
Don't fight. He brings a knife or a gun, you're dead, it's not worth it.
Click to expand...

This is pretty much it. A fist fight where one person gives up as soon as the other person is down is one thing, but it's not always like that. Depends if you know how this guy rolls or if his inevitable bunch of friends will all lay into you at once.
 
Yeah don't fight him, bring him a beer instead and when he drops his guard as he reaches for it smash the bottle upside his head. Oh an then run.
 
I'm no pro, but I'm decent at defending myself.

don't swing wild. keep your chin down and clinched like your flexing your cheek muscles, and breathe calmly through your nose. keep your hands up to your chin, and pick your shots. Once you throw a punch, keep the other hand by your chin and quickly bring the other one back in its place.

If he is kicking your ass standing, rush in like your going to hug him and pick him up by his thigh and drop him. Keep all of your weight on his chest, and drop a few shots.


I wouldn't worry about the nerves, the moment you know you're about to fight, a huge rush of adrenaline will rush through you.

But avoid it if you can, no need to look macho and risk getting seriously fucked up.
 
The part about you trash talking "Bubba" and word getting to him makes it sound like either your friends are idiots/assholes or you really do have a trash talking problem.

I seriously doubt you can defuse the situation at the party, so I agree with everyone who says you shouldn't go.
 
bring one of these.

he wont fuck with you, no way in hell.


goodness-me!.jpg
 
I recommend wearing tin foil on your knuckles that's how they used to do it in the old days or at least in Slap Shot.

In all honesty, I'd do my best to avoid fighting someone who is much bigger than me and probably has experience fighting.
 
Find out if he's going, and if he is, don't go. If you can't find out, don't go. It's not worth the consequences of a fight. If you end up going anyway and he goes, don't fight him, just leave if he pulls any shit.
 
Ultimoo said:
Don't fight. He brings a knife or a gun, you're dead, it's not worth it.
Click to expand...

This is also an issue when I think about getting into a fight nowadays. My ex-roommates were pretty good people, who generally would avoid fights, but once something starts they'd get fucking crazy. If they wound up getting beat down, they'd track down the guy that did it and blow their brains out.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Similar threads

How much do you love tacos?
2
75
536
Tunned replied
How much do you love tacos?
2
97
Rentahamster replied
How do you get rid of an earworm?
16
475
rm082e replied
  • Poll
Let's settle this. How do you pronounce 'gif'.
2 3
104
1K
Catphish replied
  • Locked
I was wondering where do Ban users go after neogaf?
40
539
DKehoe replied
Top Bottom