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[TheFrza]

 

[PhoenixDark]

Cilvaringz said the Wu album has been impounded lmao.

 

[Sanke__]

Somebody deserves the biggest Christmas bonus in history

 

[Dalek]

Where's the smirk, asshole?

 

[Demoskinos]

http://www.newyorker.com/humor/boro...es-five-thousand-per-cent?mbid=social_twitter

 

[entremet]

This guy is the gift that keeps on giving.

 

[eagledare]

The schadenfreude washes over me and comforts me like a celestial opiate sprayed from the anus of god directly into my mouth.

Suck it, Skreli.

 

[entremet]

Apparently wu tang can do a heist of the album, it's written in the contract

This is false. There is no such clause. It was bad reporting.

 

[8bit]

 

[TheSinkingKnight]

http://www.newyorker.com/humor/boro...es-five-thousand-per-cent?mbid=social_twitter

Minutes after Shkreli’s arrest on charges of securities fraud, the attorney, Harland Dorrinson, announced that he was hiking his fees from twelve hundred dollars an hour to sixty thousand dollars.


Shkreli, who reportedly received the news about the price hike while he was being fingerprinted, cried foul and accused his attorney of “outrageous and inhumane price gouging.”

“This is the behavior of a sociopath,” Shkreli was heard screaming.

LMAO!!!!

 

[LucidMomentum]

LMAO!!!!

That is incredible.

 

[banefirelord]

I'm imagining some FBI evidence handler walking through the warehouse at the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark holding Once Upon a Time in Shaolin.

 

[TheFrza]

http://www.newyorker.com/humor/boro...es-five-thousand-per-cent?mbid=social_twitter

I like his lawyer, he's cool


This whole thing seems like an elaborate Onion article, seriously


edit: I'm an idiot (still hilarious though)

 

[gamechanger87]

Indictment posted.

http://www.scribd.com/doc/293530665/Sh-Krel-i-Indictment

Like I said this guy is a scumbag who deserves to go to jail. He makes our whole industry look bad and like corporate raiders only out to screw over the common man. That is not how it works.


Edit: Also, holy shit he's a bad investor. He lost money with everything he touched. Went all in on one investment and lied about it. Pure ponzi scheme.

 

[EatinOlives]

LMAO!!!!

Holy fuck, reads like it's straight out of an Onion article!

 

[Tesseract]

HAHAHA

this is the best news of the year, what a fantastic bundle of magnificence this is

wu-tang strikes again

 

[epmode]

LMAO!!!!

I hope to god this is true. It's so perfect.

Edit: Of course it's not.

 

[Nokagi]

LMAO!!!!

How in the world could this be true. It's just too good.

 

[BreezyLimbo]

I like his lawyer, he's cool

This whole thing seems like an elaborate Onion article, seriously

It does say humor so Im assuming its not true...if it is...lol

 

[giga]

The borowitz report is satire dudes.

 

[banefirelord]

Holy fuck, reads like it's straight out of an Onion article!

The Borowitz Report is satire, so yes.

 

[Envelope]

guys the article itself says it's parody

 

[D4Danger]

https://twitter.com/socarolinesays/status/677533474555863040

His palms are sweaty,
knees weak, arms are heavy
There's vomit on his sweater already,
martin shkreli

 

[Dennis]

Albanians can't step to Slavs man, let alone Wu

Tracksuit pants.

All my stereotypes confirmed.

 

[EatinOlives]

The Borowitz Report is satire, so yes.

Aw,

Well it's good satire at least

 

[TheSinkingKnight]

The borowitz report is satire dudes.

oh...

 

[wild wild rice]

HAHAHA

this is the best news of the year, what a fantastic bundle of magnificence this is

wu-tang strikes again

ah yeah again and again baby

 

[Zodzilla]

It does say humor so Im assuming its not true...if it is...lol

It's from Borowitz so it's parody, take it as an Onion report.

 

[collige]

http://www.newyorker.com/humor/boro...es-five-thousand-per-cent?mbid=social_twitter

Seems to be satire, unfortunately.

 

[Dennis]

https://twitter.com/socarolinesays/status/677533474555863040

His palms are sweaty,
knees weak, arms are heavy
There's vomit on his sweater already,
martin shkreli

I am shkricking with laughter.

 

[B-Dubs]

Cilvaringz said the Wu album has been impounded lmao.

Time for the Wu and Bill Murray to get some FBI windbreakers and get the job done.

LMAO!!!!

Borowitz is the New Yorker's satire guy.

 

[Valtýr]

wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck wit

 

[LegendofJoe]

I like his lawyer, he's cool

This whole thing seems like an elaborate Onion article, seriously

It's a joke article. The New Yorker publishes quite a few of them, especially when circumstances like this arise that call for a little humor.

 

[JeTmAn81]

It's a Christmas miracle. Hope RZA got that money in cash.

 

[Bleepey]

Bobby Shmurda ain't got shit on him.

 

[lastflowers]

let the heist begin

Bill Murray is suiting up as we speak, slipping on his black ski-mask. The perfect opportunity.

it's a national tragedy that this movie isn't being written and filmed for our collective consumption next year.

This is perfect Cohen Brothers' Real-life-Is-Stranger-Than-Fiction shit going on. Murray and RZA just actually need to attempt the theft.

 

[Nibel]

LMAO!!!!

Legit dying over here

 

[psylah]

Someone photoshop Rza and Bill Murray to either side of him

 

[LegendofJoe]

I hope the arresting official that notified him of the charges he's facing and read him his rights followed it up with "Merry Christmas." You can't let an opportunity like that slip past.

 

[FonkyByNature]

 

[banefirelord]

it's a national tragedy that this movie isn't being written and filmed for our collective consumption next year.

This is perfect Cohen Brothers' Real-life-Is-Stranger-Than-Fiction shit going on. Murray and RZA just actually need to attempt the theft.

Maybe it's just the Bill Murray angle, but the whole thing seems much more suited to Wes Anderson in my eyes.

 

[Walter White Walker]

Such a cartoon villain slimebag. He thought he could outsmart everyone and deserves whatever is coming his way.

 

[AuthenticM]

Can he go to prison for this?

 

[BronsonLee]

Such a cartoon villain slimebag. He thought he could outsmart everyone and deserves whatever is coming his way.

'And I would've gotten away for it too, if it wasn't for that damn Wu-Tang Clan!'

Can he go to prison for this?

Oh yes.

 

[gamechanger87]

Can he go to prison for this?

You don't get cuffed nor is the FBI involved in a traditional SEC case, so yes.

 

[B-Dubs]

'And I would've gotten away for it too, if it wasn't for that damn Wu-Tang Clan!'

Don't forget Bill Murray.

 

[Ahasverus]

LMAO!!!!

All I want for christmas

 

[BobTheFork]

As has been mentioned, when the Feds are on you, you're in trouble. SEC and FBI are very thorough and careful about building cases, and don't follow through until it's tight. The fact that they nabbed him means it's tight.

Only way he could be more screwed is if the IRS was on him too.

I not questioning the validity of their case, just the consequences.

If he's guilty of everything, what's the worse that happens to him?

 

[Sealed]

amazing

 

[Tevos]

Hope he goes to prison.

That guy is the very definition of human scum.