• Hey Guest. Check out your NeoGAF Wrapped 2025 results here!

Most clueless you've ever been to sexual/romantic advances?

Status
Not open for further replies.
I was young, insecure and thought lowly of myself. There was this girl, we ended up in the same classes when I was around 16, and she was cheering me up when I felt down, but I thought nothing of it, because why would any girl be interested in being with someone like me?
During the yearly end of school festivities (about 10 months after we first met), she came up to me and asked why I had never made a move at her. I was taken aback, shocked and told her I couldn't imagine such a beautiful, gentle and kind girl would be attracted to me. She then answered that I was exactly what most beautiful gentle kind girls were looking for.

We ended up spending the summer and most of the next school year together :)
 
A girl came over to cut my hair once. We chilled and smoked pot after. Before leaving she said says, "Oh wait, I wanted to show you something." She then proceeds to bend over lift up her short dress and reveal to me her bright blue boy shorts which read, "I'd hit that!" on the back. Stoned out of my mind, I chuckled and went "Heh that's funny." She left and that was that.
 
See ladies? Men are fucking idiots and we cannot decrypt your enigma code. Just fucking kiss us or tell us to - its the only way.
 
Assault said:
Near the start of uni, this stunning Spanish babe started grinding on me in a club. I was out with two of my male spanish housemates, and around 15 of his gorgeous latina friends. Anyway, she kept grinding, but I was kinda nervous at this point so I kept shuffling alone awkwardly. Eventually, she steps into the middle of our little dancing circle and grabs my hand, imploring me to dance with her. I'm like "nahhhh, nahh, I can't dance."

At this point my housemate literally facepalms and laughs simultaneously, and asks me why the fuck I didn't dance with her.

Honestly, I have no fucking idea what happened to me that day. I lived in halls of residence with around 40 other fellas, and this was the first time I was out exclusively with the Spaniards, so I guess I felt a little intimidated.
Click to expand...

I don't blame you. I'd be ashamed of my dancing skills if I was gonna dance with a Spanish girl. They can bust moves you can't even comprehend.
 
I can't believe it.. but this must have been going on for least a quarter of a year of my 10th grade: the period of time where a hot friend on my schoolbus would giggle and cheekily run her fingers down my thigh, to the excitement of her watching friends (who seemed obsessed with gossiping about me, flirting with me, etc) After I didn't respond (I literally just did nothing when she did that) she eventually stopped the weird half joke/half serious flirting thing, but soon afterwards we'd actually sit together on the bus every afternoon and chat, and she'd wave at me every single time she exited on her bus stop, while I watched and waved slowly back. And I heard her say, to her friend, that she found me cute.

Then eventually, due to a change in bus routes, I was moved to a different bus. She was a year younger than me . We never really sought each other out during lunch/recess - we somehow never got close enough to justify it.

In my 12th grade, during study periods, we'd see each other in the library. Every single time I looked at her she was already looking at me. I'd "catch" her looking away from me the instant I looked. No, I hadn't been dull to her advances all this time, and I'd actually had a thing for her since she started flirting with me in 10th grade.

I think I didn't make a move during year 10 because I couldn't picture myself as attractive, desirable, interesting, etc. I was literally unable to comprehend how she felt (even though I somehow knew on a base level that she felt that way) and I think because I didn't comprehend it, I couldn't react to it. Hence the weird silence.

I'd had a rough year 8 - confidence-wise - that had really put me on a down turn. I'd had bad acne and this shitty can of deodorant that somehow made me stink, that for some reason I never replaced, and a girl I had to sit next to who didn't like me and made me worry about my smell and why my hair was falling out all the time, and how the cleaner kept taking my fallen hair off the carpet (which built up as I brushed individual hairs from the table throughout the day) and kept putting them back on my desk in a pile.

Anyway, 2 relationships later, I bump into the hot girl on a train. And she's no longer the sizzling, fun, flirtatious girl I knew. She dresses like a middle-aged person and talks sort of like one. I don't know how to describe the difference. There was no cheek. No immaturity. I felt immediately younger and stupider than her. I found it quite beautiful, actually, because it was the first time I meaningfully experienced what they call "growing up," through people I'd sort of grown up with. It's such a bittersweet loss that I never made a move.
 
I was in bed with a incredible latina girl. she started cuddling with me, telling me that she has a lots of fights with her boyfriend and he never kisses her enough.

all while she was so close against me and curling my hair and stuff.

I did not act on it.. because she had a boyfriend >.<
 
Sesuadra said:
I was in bed with a incredible latina girl. she started cuddling with me, telling me that she has a lots of fights with her boyfriend and he never kisses her enough.

all while she was so close against me and curling my hair and stuff.

I did not act on it.. because she had a boyfriend >.<
Click to expand...

Pretty normal situation.
 
Mine are a bunch of maybes.

When I was 16/17. Girl I liked and who was stunningly hot (baby face, blonde blue eyes, petite yet with giant tits and a big ass). Used to talk with her for 5-10 mins after school before her Mum picked her up.

She borrowed a copy of Office I burned but she couldn't install it. Perhaps a hint that I should go round and help her install it? Or another time when she was maybe coming to the same holiday location as I, so if I was near it'd be cool to meet up. She didn't go, but maybe a hint to meet up when I'm back from holiday? (another piecevof evidence is that she left the school that year).

More obvious one when I was 11/12. Again a Blonde Blue eyed girl. She sat on my lap and kept saying she likes me in class, getting all flirtatous like. But despite being into wanking and porn by this age, I found all of that shy inducing. WTF was I thinking. Even if she was having a laugh could've twisted that to my advantage with MSN chatting.

Another one when I was in my early teens. Girl wonders in class what facewash I use as my skin was so smooth. Arguably hottest girl in our year at that school, half white half South Asian, tall light brown skinned. Even if it was a maybe would be a perfect excuse for MSN flirtation.

Also throughout my teens, girls would sometimes play with my curly locks in class.

A recent one last Summer while on holiday at our Summer house in my ancestral country. Cute freckled brunette girl says that I have a very calm and chilled personality, and then I had to go my Cousin's wedding and when I returned she pointed out how even in photos I gave off that cool vibe.

And a few years back, again on holiday, my cousin's female friend took me out around town. A maybe since I think she liked my cousin and was just being nice (She would go out with my cousin a few years later). Pseudo-Japanese look about her.

And finally ancestral country again. This time in my mid teens a female cousin's friend asking me (via my cousin) to download a bunch of Simpsons and other such shows. A maybe but still. This girl looks like Lizzy Kaplan. And another time my female cousin asked mevif I found Lizzy Kaplan lookalike's cousin was attractive, since we had hung out that day.

All the ones on holiday can further be justified since I'm from the cool Western English speaking country, which automatically makes you cool to them. And I guess the reverse affect with the girls at school, coolness due to exotic Mediterranean features.

In conclusion. Is there a word for realising stuff after the fact? And specifically for not getting hints till later? I think there's a French word for it?
 
I would love to be in some of the situation people had here... I would definitely have done something, unfortunately for me, these things never happen to me, i don't attracts girls! (or maybe i'm even more clueless than i think, but i doubt it, never got anything close to a girl making advance to me, it was always me who did something toward them)
 
giga-ganon said:
I would love to be in some of the situation people had here... I would definitely have done something, unfortunately for me, these things never happen to me, i don't attracts girls! (or maybe i'm even more clueless than i think, but i doubt it, never got anything close to a girl making advance to me, it was always me who did something toward them)
Click to expand...
Ahhh ye olde 4th dimensional cluelessness.

I'm lucky. All my EXs advanced towards me first. But then it's also bad because I have no exp. being the initiator. Maybe it doesn't matter and it's just a personality thing. And hell getting the girls to come to me means I must being so doing some of the subtle and subconcious stuff right.
 
Stereogatari said:
Ahhh ye olde 4th dimensional cluelessness.

I'm lucky. All my EXs advanced towards me first. But then it's also bad because I have no exp. being the initiator. Maybe it doesn't matter and it's just a personality thing. And hell getting the girls to come to me means I must being so doing some of the subtle and subconcious stuff right.
Click to expand...

Well, i always go toward girls, only because i have no choice, but i'm clueless about it, I don't count the time i failed, i only managed to success two times, but the relation only lasted 1 month the first time, and 3 month the second time, and i'm 26...

So yeah, i would love to get hit on sometimes...
 
Every day of my life. I just assume women are just being nice so i don't accidentally make the wrong move.
 
This happend recently and I am ashamed..

This girl I know says that she has muscle ache from working out, so I say ; let me give you a massage.

She undresses and gets onto bed and I give her the massage. She was only wearing her underwear (which I could see through) but I didn't remove it and I didn't fuck her.

I didn't do it because I promised her a massage and nothing else.

As soon as I came home I got a text that she wanted me to fuck her :(

le cry for being a decent guy.
 
Thriller said:
This happend recently and I am ashamed..

This girl I know says that she has muscle ache from working out, so I say ; let me give you a massage.

She undresses and gets onto bed and I give her the massage. She was only wearing her underwear (which I could see through) but I didn't remove it and I didn't fuck her.

I didn't do it because I promised her a massage and nothing else.

As soon as I came home I got a text that she wanted me to fuck her :(

le cry for being a decent guy.
Click to expand...
You did text her back right?
 
plenty of times I've been attracted to a girl. But I'm way too casual as I have the mentality of "don't try to flirt with her as you suck at flirting and taking subtle hints" so I'm just funny/friendly. Only to be told later that the girl was totally dropping hints and that I missed them. Guys being clueless is nothing new.

to be fair I was also clueless about a girl who i thought was into me, but she was a lesbian haha. Isn't the first time I didn't get that the person was gay, I'm horrible at subtlety.
 
I was about 14-15 and became close friends with a girl from my school. We hung out all the time, went to her house etc. Looking back I'm pretty certain she was into me but I just wasn't interested in romance at the time and so I was completely oblivious. Eventually we drifted apart. She was actually pretty cute too.
 
Thriller said:
This happend recently and I am ashamed..

This girl I know says that she has muscle ache from working out, so I say ; let me give you a massage.

She undresses and gets onto bed and I give her the massage. She was only wearing her underwear (which I could see through) but I didn't remove it and I didn't fuck her.

I didn't do it because I promised her a massage and nothing else.

As soon as I came home I got a text that she wanted me to fuck her :(

le cry for being a decent guy.
Click to expand...

this one hurt.
 
Not quite sexual but summer after graduating HS, I asked out One of the girls Who I had asked to prom (couldn't go because she was on probation always late to school).

Anyway I was hanging with friends and 1 of them egged me on to ask her out on a real date. Mind you, when I asked her to prom it was kind of a passing comment and not a full fledged proposal. More like " hey what're you doing for prom etc..."

Anyway I got the courage to ask her to the movies and hang out afterwards. She immediately said sure. I was ecstatic. Then she added, we can take her little cousin and go see Kung Fu Panda. Inside I was like Fuck that, I wanna see the Hulk. So I looked at her weird and said no thanks, stupidly.

Turns out that she just wanted to "feel me out" and actually did want to go out with me :(

And I stupidly declined without really thinking. She's my great white buffalo
 
This is a funny thread. I had one so fucking obvious, I still think about it to this day.

Sitting on a couch, at like 3 am after a party, we're the only two awake still. Me and this girl are talking while watching TV, she complains she's cold. It's not even remotely cold in this room. I point to a blanket and say "Look there's a blanket, ya goof." She never ended up grabbing the blanket.
 
Ray Wonder said:
This is a funny thread. I had one so fucking obvious, I still think about it to this day.

Sitting on a couch, at like 3 am after a party, we're the only two awake still. Me and this girl are talking while watching TV, she complains she's cold. It's not even remotely cold in this room. I point to a blanket and say "Look there's a blanket, ya goof." She never ended up grabbing the blanket.
Click to expand...

I always assume that's a "give me your jacket" move, not a "let's cuddle"
 
I have two that come to mind...

When I was a sophomore in high school I was asked to prom by a junior who was pretty damn hot. She was a cheerleader, blonde, long legs, just really hot. I figured the only reason she asked me was because she couldn't find anyone else.

Anyway we had a pretty good time - from what I can recall. After it was over, everyone was going to party and she wanted to go and wanted me to go with her. I said, "no, I am just going to call it a night" and took her home.

Well fast forward to school on Monday and I catch all kinds of hell from everyone. She ended up at the party and got drunk, saying how she couldn't believe I didn't come with her. Apparently she was really into me. After that happened, she was not interested in me at all.

So fast forward about 10 years...

At my previous job we would always go out to the local pizza place from lunch every other Friday. Well there was a new girl and she joined us. I ended up driving and she rode with me. Just the two of us on about a 15 minute drive on the other side of town.

Well we are headed that way and I start asking her about herself, just trying to make small talk. She starts talking about how she lives with her boyfriend, but he is always gone because of work. How he can't satisfy her. What she loves to do sexually. They whole time just staring me up and down and giving me the look.

I don't know why I didn't pick it up at the time. I probably could have just taken her out to a spot in the country right then and had my way with her. But it just didn't click at the time.

I did get the chance to make that one up though.
 
Coach said:
I have two that come to mind...

When I was a sophomore in high school I was asked to prom by a junior who was pretty damn hot. She was a cheerleader, blonde, long legs, just really hot. I figured the only reason she asked me was because she couldn't find anyone else.

Anyway we had a pretty good time - from what I can recall. After it was over, everyone was going to party and she wanted to go and wanted me to go with her. I said, "no, I am just going to call it a night" and took her home.

Well fast forward to school on Monday and I catch all kinds of hell from everyone. She ended up at the party and got drunk, saying how she couldn't believe I didn't come with her. Apparently she was really into me. After that happened, she was not interested in me at all.

So fast forward about 10 years...

At my previous job we would always go out to the local pizza place from lunch every other Friday. Well there was a new girl and she joined us. I ended up driving and she rode with me. Just the two of us on about a 15 minute drive on the other side of town.

Well we are headed that way and I start asking her about herself, just trying to make small talk. She starts talking about how she lives with her boyfriend, but he is always gone because of work. How he can't satisfy her. What she loves to do sexually. They whole time just staring me up and down and giving me the look.

I don't know why I didn't pick it up at the time. I probably could have just taken her out to a spot in the country right then and had my way with her. But it just didn't click at the time.

I did get the chance to make that one up though.
Click to expand...
The 2nd one is acceptable to avoid until she ended it with her BF.

But the first one damn. Blonde, long legs, cheerleader. One of the ultimate fantasies and you could have had the reality.
 
1) I had a female friend in college who we both knew we had been mutually attracted to in the past literally send me a Facebook message saying "Make a move."

I must have thought she meant it in the overly slow, laborious, iceberg-like speed that I considered "making a move" - 6 dates where I don't really touch her and we just watch movies on TV over. I think she eventually lost interest in me romantically and we both drifted apart (in part because I thought she wasn't giving us a fair shot). In retrospect, I must just not have seem super interested. I think about that one sometimes.

2) I had another female friend in college who I had starting getting really close to as a friend. We met up one time to go to a party and just at that moment I noticed a late voicemail from her come through my phone. I told her I was going to listen to it. In the voicemail she talked about meeting up and ended it with "We can even hold hands or whatever."

I thought it was kind of an amusing thing to say so I asked her, "You wanna hold hands? We can do that if you want." and she kinda just played it off like she was joking. In retrospect I would have just silently took her hand and walked with her to the party.

I later found out from a mutual friend that she said that we were very close to dating during that period, but it didn't happen.

3) In high school, I had a female friend who I knew had a crush on me and had even given me a pin with the lyric "I want you to want me" on it. One time I was dropping her off at home after we had hung out. I can't remember exactly how it played out, but I got the vibe she wanted me to come up with her but I didn't do or say anything. She left and we later both talked about how weird it was that I didn't walk her inside her house. I think, in part, with that one though I didn't really want to make a move because I was about to head to college and didn't want to start anything.

Gah!
 
In one of my sophomore engineering classes there was this girl who kept talking with me before and after class, drove me back to my dorm a bunch, wanted to study/work with me, and would come up to me any time she saw me on campus to talk. She was very sweet and intelligent (she is in grad school now) but...she smoked. I have nothing against it personally, but my lungs wheeze at a slight whiff.

I never developed feelings for her, but I did like being around her (apart from the smoke) and she was the type of girl I like (gentle, sweet, supporting, independent, and intelligent). She probably did have an interest in me, and I have always wondered what could have been had I stayed around her longer or played along a little.

I remember that she commented on the smoking and asked if I could tolerate being around a smoker. She could probably tell from the wheezing and hoarseness I got when around her haha.
 
mrklaw said:
See ladies? Men are fucking idiots and we cannot decrypt your enigma code. Just fucking kiss us or tell us to - its the only way.
Click to expand...

Did you not see the post where the guy recounted a story of a girl telling him multiple times that she wanted to have sex with him?
 
I have a few that aren't really good stories at all, but it took my girlfriend putting on flirty eyes and literally asking "How big is your penis?" before I clued in that she was interested in dating. Later on she said she thought I was gay because I took so long to make a move.
 
mrklaw said:
See ladies? Men are fucking idiots and we cannot decrypt your enigma code. Just fucking kiss us or tell us to - its the only way.
Click to expand...

Too right, or hold our hand that is the best feeling I reckon... probably cause I don't do it enough\ ever.

Always-honest said:
Unless the other person literally says she likes me or dislikes me, i'm clueless. And even then i could be wrong.
Click to expand...

Yep, I let one slip away 1.5 months ago cause I was pussy to ask her out cause I didn't know weather she liked me or not.
 
Never was clueless (in my knowledge)

My problem was I rejected people for no reason. Maybe I had no idea how else to engage the situation at such a young age.

I think back on it now and I can't believe what I missed lol

Punch myself in the face if I could travel in time.

infinitys_7th said:
I remember that she commented on the smoking and asked if I could tolerate being around a smoker. She could probably tell from the wheezing and hoarseness I got when around her haha.
Click to expand...

Oh lol, I also had to reject girls that smoked cause it was unbearable for me at the time.

How ungrateful could I be? :P
 
I usually act at them...

It's just happened more often than not the things that I thought as signals turned out to be nothing :/

Ladies are so often hard to read :/ :/ :/
 
im so fucking clueless and pessemistic even after I hook up with a chick I'm all like "oh she can't be interested in me I suck."
 
Man these are gold.

In Year 12 I was the only guy in a class of 10 or so girls. I guess that's one reason why you study Indonesian. We all got along fine and would sling jokes back and forth. It did help that our teacher was pretty lax so we pretty much talked for the majority of the lesson.
There was this one girl I sat next to that I got along with. We flirted a bit but nothing major. Our teacher would sometimes invite the class back to her house to teach us how to cook Indonesian food and we would all carpool together to get to her house. In retrospect it was a bit weird.
Anyway school ends, we all graduate and go our separate ways. I never keep in touch with people (because apparently I'm an idiot) so we all kinda drift apart.
And then I get an invite to my friend's birthday party a year later.
So yeah, I rock up there. It's a pool party and there are around 3 guys total, me being one of them. We all reminisce and what not. We're all sitting in a circle and one of the girls points to me and another girl and says "Didn't you too used to have a thing?"
And we kinda caught each others eye and after a bit I nodded and said "Yeah I suppose so."
Then I added. "To be honest I can't really remember. It was like a year ago."

Then I went home and played Team Fortress 2.
 
My phone was on charge at a party and a girl walks up to me and asks if that's my phone I say yes, she proceeds to put her number in and walk off. I was 16/17 and completely oblivious to it.
 
I used to meet this girl on a train bridge every night at around 11pm, to just chat and stuff. About a year later it turns out she was waiting for me to make a move all that time. I was completely oblivious to it. Especially the last time I ever met her there (before I moved away to university).

The next day as I was on the motorway she sent me a text saying how I should have kissed her. I felt gutted. By the time Uni was over and I got back permanently things had changed. She was the one that got away.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Similar threads

Frequent Fliers, what's the most annoying thing someone has done on a plane you've flown on?
2
65
288
clarky replied
Remember Elizabeth Smart? From kidnapping and sexual assault survivor to champion bodybuilder
3
183
Bojji replied
The worst commercials you've ever seen.
2
84
3K
Beretta replied
Jesus, This Is The Most Saddest Plea For Help Ever...
29
684
Trogdor1123 replied
Are Plato and Aristotle the most influential humans that have ever lived?
2
83
1K
Baemono replied
Top Bottom