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my best friend is cockblocking me

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Sounds like you guys want each other.

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Answer: A competitive game of "Peanut Butter Swords".

Your friend gets a jar of peanut-butter, and then, like Nidhogg, you...
 
it's hilarious that i can imagine your conversations based on the fact that your phone auto-corrected "how" to "hoe" automatically.
 
it's hilarious that i can imagine your conversations based on the fact that your phone auto-corrected "how" to "hoe" automatically.

Actually, my phone didn't do that. I was drunk and actually typed that. My phone just didn't bother to fix the mistake.
 
Things are going to get cataclysmic and both of you will both find out she's dating a guy both of you didn't know about.
 
Clearly you both don't want eachother sleeping with other people.

In other words, you should have sex with him and break out of all that pent up sexual tension between the two of you.
 
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