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Official NFL Offseason Thread: Come back NFL! Come... back...

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MaestroRyan @ 6:13pm said:
are you serious? did you not read my mad rhyme? i just nutted all over your face, dude, you'd better wipe that shit off before your man comes home.
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j A ck Me 0 0 7 (6:07:36 PM): we torched that POS defense
TinyOrphanJesus (6:07:51 PM): POS? 8th in the league and 2nd best run defense of all time
j A ck Me 0 0 7 (6:07:56 PM): you guys were going for an Nfl record...
j A ck Me 0 0 7 (6:08:04 PM): and S.Jack nutted on your faces
TinyOrphanJesus (6:08:05 PM): 2nd of all time isn't that bad, son
j A ck Me 0 0 7 (6:08:15 PM): S Jack
j A ck Me 0 0 7 (6:08:18 PM): Nut
j A ck Me 0 0 7 (6:08:21 PM): Faces
TinyOrphanJesus (6:09:09 PM): this is how you greet me? "hey i haven't talked to TOJ in a while how about i tell him about nutting on some faces or something"


Stealing jokes eh?!
 
Maestro just got Mencia'd! Oh snap! Fridayton! What what! ICEBURN!

Contents of this post are not entirely original. Post may contain samples of comedic works of other posters across the internets. All rights reserved. Void in Alaska, Hawaii, and Puerto Rico. BQuinn future.
 
I heard on AM570 (the Raider station in Los Angeles) that they're going to release Randy Moss soon.

Calvin Johnson and LOLpepper are as good as ours! Running is for pussies, ya gotta go with the deep ball!
 
Karakand said:
I heard on AM570 (the Raider station in Los Angeles) that they're going to release Randy Moss soon.

Calvin Johnson and LOLpepper are as good as ours! Running is for pussies, ya gotta go with the deep ball!
Click to expand...

Randy Moss would look good on a team that has an offensive line.
 
Karakand said:
I heard on AM570 (the Raider station in Los Angeles) that they're going to release Randy Moss soon.

Calvin Johnson and LOLpepper are as good as ours! Running is for pussies, ya gotta go with the deep ball!
Click to expand...
Why cut Moss? Porter is the douche who was happy the team was losing.
 
Striker said:
Why cut Moss? Porter is the douche who was happy the team was losing.
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Porter is on board with the coaching staff, Randy isn't.

Porter also can't be cut without taking a cap hit. Cutting Randy gives them cap relief.
 
methodman said:
Randy Moss would look good on a team that has an offensive line.
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At this point I wouldn't be against to Randy coming across the bay. We could then get TWO defensive studs in the draft. Jamaal Anderson & Patrick Willis perhaps?
 
the bengals are looking for a #3 receiver!

nah, just kidding, as much as Randy Moss would make nearly any team better, they don't have the cap space for the kind of deal he wants, most likely. Plus I'm more excited that they signed austin powers/the murderer from the Halloween movies!
 
Nameless said:
At this point I wouldn't be against to Randy coming across the bay. We could then get TWO defensive studs in the draft. Jamaal Anderson & Patrick Willis perhaps?
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Me neither man. yeah, they could easily trade up and pick up a Defensive lineman AND a linebacker in the first round, both would be starters. that'd help us out so much

mertonchickendancegif.gif

classic.
 
methodman said:
Me neither man. yeah, they could easily trade up and pick up a Defensive lineman AND a linebacker in the first round, both would be starters. that'd help us out so much

mertonchickendancegif.gif

classic.
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Ahh man I miss Merton Hanks!! He and Tim McDonald were the best safety tandem in the league for a while!! Damn, we used to have such a great defense. Hopefully after Sunday will be closer to getting back to that level.
 
merton hanks had the longest neck i've ever seen. everyone in dallas used to make fun of him. too bad those safeties couldn't stop irvin, harper, or novacek.
 
MaestroRyan said:
HOLY SHIT GUYS


Todd Lowber, the new 6'3'' studly WR the Vikings signed, ran a 4.11 and 4.21 when he had his team workouts (I think Eagles and Niners scouts were there).


So Todd Lowber is 6'3'', runs a 4.11 and has a 43 inch vertical? **** off Calvin, LOWBER IN DA HOUSSSSE
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He didn't run a 4.11, his agent is lying. Do you know how fast that is?:P
 
During my sophomore year of college, our coach got Art Shell to come in and talk to us and when asked about the fastest 40 time he ever saw, he did bring up Bo Jackson running a 4.18 one time.
 
I honestly think AGonzo will be there in the 2nd round when we pick, so I'll choose option C: BQuinn and AGonzo.
 
Karakand said:
I heard on AM570 (the Raider station in Los Angeles) that they're going to release Randy Moss soon.

Calvin Johnson and LOLpepper are as good as ours! Running is for pussies, ya gotta go with the deep ball!
Click to expand...

That completely ****s up everything the Lions have planned(most likely). I would love to see them trade down, but no team is going to trade up if CJ isn't available.

However if the Raiders pick CJ, the Lions need to jump on Jamarcus.
 
For 40 times those .01 differences are so ridiculously negligible it is not even funny. TMQ wrote a good article once on how insignificant they are.
 
MaestroRyan said:
yeah, but when you consider everyone runs their 40 time without pads but then plays with pads, everyone faces the same disadvantage. the speed difference between a WR that runs a 4.2 and a CB that runs a 4.4 will still be the same when both are wearing pads.
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not necessarily. There are some that are stronger than others.
 
MaestroRyan said:
yeah, but when you consider everyone runs their 40 time without pads but then plays with pads, everyone faces the same disadvantage. the speed difference between a WR that runs a 4.2 and a CB that runs a 4.4 will still be the same when both are wearing pads.
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There's a small difference in that most players in the NFL have been wearing pads for anywhere from seven to twenty years, and this guy has never worn football pads in his life.


You know, just a small point.
 
woodchuck said:
Jamarcus is a CHEATER. did you see what he did in the rookie challenge?
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The #1 pick must be killing Al. CJ smokes weed and J-Mark bends the rules. Either one would do the Silver and Black proud.
 
Karakand said:
The #1 pick must be killing Al. CJ smokes weed and J-Mark bends the rules. Either one would do the Silver and Black proud.
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I'd be weary of Russel's accuracy. On the show, the dude couldn't even throw a nerf ball through a tire 10 feet away. he had to cheat to win. what a loser.
 
woodchuck said:
I'd be weary of Russel's accuracy. On the show, the dude couldn't even throw a nerf ball through a tire 10 feet away. he had to cheat to win. what a loser.
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Preaching to the choir, dude. I wanted Leinart last draft instead of another ****ing safety.
 
Ninja Scooter said:
JaMarcus Russell on the best damn sports show said that he can throw a football 60 yards from his knees.

nfl15ce_lower.jpg

**cums**
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I'd hope out of all the coaches in the league he wouldn't be going crazy over that, considering the last QB he drafted said and did the same thing.
 
MaestroRyan said:
The Raiders could also skip JaMarcus and take Calvin with the 1st pick and Trent Edwards with their second rounder.
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Trent Edwards already knows how to play behind a nonexistent o-line. Perfect fit.
 
NFL Network reported the Panthers and Rams are closing in on a deal that would send Jenkins to the Rams for the Rams' 2nd round pick (the 20th pick in the 2nd round). To be honest, I would rather keep Jenkins. He's a great DT and I think with another good/great year he could prove that he's worth a first rounder. I think the Panthers are only desperate to get rid of him because the bridges have been burned though.
 
Big Zep said:
Thanks Bowser! We'll take another one off your hands :)
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STOP STEALING OUR DEFENSE.

I'm not looking forward to the prospect of seeing a motivated Chris Draft and an angry/motivated Jenkins, not to mention one of my favorite former Panthers Will Witherspoon in the first week of the season :(
 
Bowser said:
NFL Network reported the Panthers and Rams are closing in on a deal that would send Jenkins to the Rams for the Rams' 2nd round pick (the 20th pick in the 2nd round). To be honest, I would rather keep Jenkins. He's a great DT and I think with another good/great year he could prove that he's worth a first rounder. I think the Panthers are only desperate to get rid of him because the bridges have been burned though.
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I'd rather keep him around, too, at least for one more season to see how his knees hold up. The pick's a little low in the second round IMO, but it'll be interesting to see what they do if this goes through.
 
Nameless said:
That was a lot more than $800
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It was $800, even the description on the video says it was $800. Everything reported locally is that it was about $800 in twenties, tens and fives.
 
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