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Post an almost unbelievable fact about yourself..

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I have this weird small hole on the side of my right ear that scars up all the time. I've had it since I was a little kid, and I have no idea how it got there. I have looked up similar things on Google, and the spot where my hole is where people say alien grays put their implants when they abduct you. :lol

What is really odd is that the hole gets itchy all the time, and when I scratch it, it smells fucking awful..like dirty old socks. It's very pungent. You can smell it across the room.
 
I once pissed off a high level Microsoft executive with a message board post. That executive then signed up for the message board just to call me a loser.
 
PantherLotus said:
2. I got on stage with the Kottonmouth Kings and danced with their hoes during 'The Pimp Twist.' At the same bar, Lejon from Sevendust would buy my friend and I a drink for unnamed services. Caught the drumstick from Limp Bizkut.

...

9. I used to be a driver. For bad people. I got paid with bad things. Cannot specify.

Huh.
 
a Master Ninja said:
I once pissed off a high level Microsoft executive with a message board post. That executive then signed up for the message board just to call me a loser.

?

and you missed a prime to prove you are Itagaki.
 
I'm on GAF so often that the line between my life and other posters' lives has long been blurred.

I also took out my dad's eye in a brawl, once . (
 
PantherLotus said:
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I took back my girlfriend of 3 years after she had a threesome with a married couple.

P.S. The wife was preggers.

P.P.S. it lasted mere weeks after that (this was years ago) and I still feel like a tool for doing it. I can :lol when I hear about her from friends now, though. Not in the best situation there.
 
I went to Babies R' Us yesterday but I don't have a child and never will. I had to buy Stove knob guards because my one clumsy cat will accidentally turn the burners on when he tries to jump on top of it.
 
i once masturbated in a taxi cab (went all the way) and the driver didn't even noticed. it was daytime too btw.
 
Bryan Singer and I went to the same high school.

John Nash lives in (or near) my neighborhood. I've seen him in Acme a couple times.
 
Ford Prefect said:
I also took out my dad's eye in a brawl, once . (

LOL at the . ( emoticon.

My almost unbelievable fact:
There's a (very) slim chance that I have latent CJD (ie, mad cow for humans) from taking growth hormone injections as a child made from the crushed pituitary glands of cadavers. It could be there, waiting for the right time to reduce me to a bumbling idiot and then kill me, but it's probably not. Still, I can't give blood.

Also I hate The Princess Bride.
 
im 43 and I am still a virgin. i used to talk about it alot(about my feelings) on teamxboxs forums, but they very often made fun of me. and finally banned me.
 
Shoho said:
im 43 and I am still a virgin. i used to talk about it alot(about my feelings) on teamxboxs forums, but they very often made fun of me. and finally banned me.


And there is confirmation for Virginity!
 
Shoho said:
im 43 and I am still a virgin. i used to talk about it alot(about my feelings) on teamxboxs forums, but they very often made fun of me. and finally banned me.

Wow, 43...I won't make fun of you for it but that is rather...scary? Is there a particular reason? Do you meet women at all?
 
I won the laptop I currently posting this on by beating a 12 year old girl in a game of frogger.

Absolutely true.
 
Shoho said:
im 43 and I am still a virgin. i used to talk about it alot(about my feelings) on teamxboxs forums, but they very often made fun of me. and finally banned me.
thank you.
 
Shoho said:
im 43 and I am still a virgin. i used to talk about it alot(about my feelings) on teamxboxs forums, but they very often made fun of me. and finally banned me.


You are indeed a hero of the web. Now I want to find out who is Shawn Elliott in these forums?
 
- I'm black, and I LOVE Seinfeld.

- my IQ is almost 160

- I'm the best rapper you've never heard

- I've seen demons. I'd rather not go any more in depth than that, but I will.

- I once had the barrel of a .357 pressed to my forehead. I figured it was all over, so I started talking mad shit to the kid, telling him to shoot me, calling him a bitch, just going nuts. He got really unnerved, back away slowly, hopped in his car and peeled off. I would have taken the gun, if my friends four year old daughter hadn't been sitting a few feet away from me.

- The same night as the above, one of his friends tried to run me over. I was standing in front of the car, and the phrase "JUMP NOW!" popped in my head. As soon as my feet left the ground, he smashed the gas, and I managed to get my hand down on the hood, and I rolled over the top of the car, launching ten feet up into the air. I landed on my feet. My friend Jon , to this day, says it was the most unbelievable thing he's ever seen.

- I created my own fighting styles when I was 18. Then, I spent the next 3 years traveling to different dojos, challenging head instructors to unsanctioned matches, to prove the merit of my techniques. I won't list every match I had or who I've sparred, but I will say that I fought a member of The Martial Arts Hall Of Fame to a stalemate. I will admit that he hit me in the stomach so hard that I literal thought an organ ruptured.

- I wrote two and a half books on combat: Liquid Snake Fierce Rushing Wind, The Book Of Death, and To Become A Killer.

- I went to culinary school. A prodigy they called him.

- I got in a car accident a few years ago, that left me paralyzed. Otherwise, you'd all have heard my name by now.

- I had the most beautiful woman in the world, and lost her to fucking amnesia. FUUUCCCKK.

- My entire life has sucked. Believe it.
 
While working at gamefan magazine, two other staff members and I had sex with a hooker(simone was her name) in a hotel room in vegas.....each of us had a seprate go at her one after the other...I went first, finished my business, went downstares where the other two were waiting and then the next guy went up by himself and so on...


This was during Vegas Winter CES BTW (1992 I believe?)


I was young and stupid and I am not very proud of it, but yes, it happened...
 
I've been in two severe motorcycle wrecks (One my fault, one not) and escaped both without a single scratch or break.

The first wreck happened at dusk as I was riding an unfamiliar country road. The road cut sharply to the left and I couldn't tell before it was too late. I went down an embankment, hit the bottom and got knocked out. The bike continued up the other side of the embankment and launched my body into a field. I woke up facing the sky; the bike had landed a couple of feet from where I was. This one made absolutely no sense to me; I was going at least 80mph when it happened.

The second wreck happened on a 4-Lane highway. A woman with road rage had been bothering people for miles (I found this part out later). She cut in front of me for no reason (I was in the slow lane, she was in the fast lane) and started brake checking me for no reason. I passed her and made some distance. She came up again, got in front of me, and started doing the same thing while swerving back and forth (Like racers do to keep people from passing). She then slammed on the brakes; my front tire lodged between her bumper and the ground and bucked me into the corner of the rear window. I skipped off that and landed on the asphalt. A doctor had seen the accident and was insistant that I remain down because he said that it had looked like I should have broken my collar bone/back/spine in the accident.
 
K.Jack said:
- I'm black, and I LOVE Seinfeld.

- my IQ is almost 160

- I'm the best rapper you've never heard

- I've seen demons. I'd rather not go any more in depth than that, but I will.

- I once had the barrel of a .357 pressed to my forehead. I figured it was all over, so I started talking mad shit to the kid, telling him to shoot me, calling him a bitch, just going nuts. He got really unnerved, back away slowly, hopped in his car and peeled off. I would have taken the gun, if my friends four year old daughter hadn't been sitting a few feet away from me.

- The same night as the above, one of his friends tried to run me over. I was standing in front of the car, and the phrase "JUMP NOW!" popped in my head. As soon as my feet left the ground, he smashed the gas, and I managed to get my hand down on the hood, and I rolled over the top of the car, launching ten feet up into the air. I landed on my feet. My friend Jon , to this day, says it was the most unbelievable thing he's ever seen.

- I created my own fighting styles when I was 18. Then, I spent the next 3 years traveling to different dojos, challenging head instructors to unsanctioned matches, to prove the merit of my techniques. I won't list every match I had or who I've sparred, but I will say that I fought a member of The Martial Arts Hall Of Fame to a stalemate. I will admit that he hit me in the stomach so hard that I literal thought an organ ruptured.

- I wrote two and a half books on combat: Liquid Snake Fierce Rushing Wind, The Book Of Death, and To Become A Killer.

- I went to culinary school. A prodigy they called him.

- I got in a car accident a few years ago, that left me paralyzed. Otherwise, you'd all have heard my name by now.

- I had the most beautiful woman in the world, and lost her to fucking amnesia. FUUUCCCKK.

- My entire life has sucked. Believe it.

dude if they made a movie out of your life I'd watch it
 
K.Jack said:
- I'm black, and I LOVE Seinfeld.

- my IQ is almost 160

- I'm the best rapper you've never heard

- I've seen demons. I'd rather not go any more in depth than that, but I will.

- I once had the barrel of a .357 pressed to my forehead. I figured it was all over, so I started talking mad shit to the kid, telling him to shoot me, calling him a bitch, just going nuts. He got really unnerved, back away slowly, hopped in his car and peeled off. I would have taken the gun, if my friends four year old daughter hadn't been sitting a few feet away from me.

- The same night as the above, one of his friends tried to run me over. I was standing in front of the car, and the phrase "JUMP NOW!" popped in my head. As soon as my feet left the ground, he smashed the gas, and I managed to get my hand down on the hood, and I rolled over the top of the car, launching ten feet up into the air. I landed on my feet. My friend Jon , to this day, says it was the most unbelievable thing he's ever seen.

- I created my own fighting styles when I was 18. Then, I spent the next 3 years traveling to different dojos, challenging head instructors to unsanctioned matches, to prove the merit of my techniques. I won't list every match I had or who I've sparred, but I will say that I fought a member of The Martial Arts Hall Of Fame to a stalemate. I will admit that he hit me in the stomach so hard that I literal thought an organ ruptured.

- I wrote two and a half books on combat: Liquid Snake Fierce Rushing Wind, The Book Of Death, and To Become A Killer.

- I went to culinary school. A prodigy they called him.

- I got in a car accident a few years ago, that left me paralyzed. Otherwise, you'd all have heard my name by now.

- I had the most beautiful woman in the world, and lost her to fucking amnesia. FUUUCCCKK.

- My entire life has sucked. Believe it.

prove all of it.
 
I have a scar on my eyeball from being stabbed with a pair of scissors in a hamster-related incident.

I am qualified to provide spiritual healing to gerbils.
 
My family used to bottle Coca Cola in Australia, before Coke bought up all the smaller independent bottlers in the late 80's.

I met one of the original Andy Warhol 'Factory' guys earlier this year in Bangkok. He was clearly insane.

I have no embarrassing masturbation stories.
 
Oh well to contribute:

I screwed my then girlfriend's sister. This is legendary. But true.
I beat Super Mario Bros when I was 4
GAF is my homepage, and the page I visit every day.
 
I've worked with with a person that won a Noble prize in physics, and my research group might have broke a $300,000 laser system of another noble prize winner with a 30,000 Kilovolt short (however, he should never have used a water pipe as his ground).
 
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