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Restaurant check splitting protocol: Itemized or even split?

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Pretty even orders per person? Split evenly.

Large difference? Pay separately.

There was a time when I didn't care, but I have one friend who likes to drink and prefers the expensive stuff on a menu. On top of that she usually doesn't finish her drinks or food, just likes to taste lots of things.
 
xenist said:
Even. Don't be the gross kind of people that start doing math at the table. In fact with friends I often eat with its usual for one person to pick up the entire check at a time.
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This is generally my protocol too. We'll either have a set of folks to throw their cards in the arena and it gets split evenly across those cards or we just decide that its "your turn" and you've got it this time. We generally spend about the same when we go out as a group that it eventually just rounds itself out over time. Doing the math at the table is just uncouth IMO. Either decide to do that up front or be ready to split it without looking at an itemized bill.
 
aku:jiki said:
Damn right. Strict rules and absolutely no compromise under any circumstance is how to properly do this "friendship" thing.
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When it comes to dinner it is.

Everyone paying their own becomes confusing when there's shared dishes and/or wine involved. Drags down the enjoyment of the evening when there's a bunch of discussion and math and someone always walks away feeling like they got shafted.

Solution: Order what you want, drink what you want (wine by consensus), split the bill at the end.

The Faceless Master said:
mine are the exact opposite. everyone pays their own way. don't go if you don't got the dough!
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It's not about the dough. We all have plenty of money for eating at restaurants. It's about the hassle on both the serving staff and the diners.
 
I itemize because I want to order whatever and don't want to fuck other people with my 30€ steak.

Also I don't drink wine but in don't mind paying. I just want to order whatever I want without having the guy who order a salad pay for my stuff.
 
Phat Michael said:
I agree with the bolded. Here is what i do.

1) if im with a group of people i care about and we are sharing food (i.e. chinese style meals) - i insist on paying because then i get to order whatever i want. No one will say "oh dont get scallops, they are too expensive" - fuck that, ill order everything and pay for it. If i get this one, you get the next one.

2) semi close friends or extended group with single meals - just divide it by the number of people - who cares if you lose out on a bit or come ahead - it evens out over time.

3) if i see people reach for calculators and argue over who have what, i walk over to the desk/register and pay for everything myself to save from the embarrassment of watching people argue over who had a slightly more expensive starter than another person.

life is too short for this shit. Those who argue and bring out calculators to work out how much they had are people not worth wasting time over.
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This man speaks the truth. The only time we bring out the calculator at dinner is to figure out how to make the even split after tip is added in.

(Total bill + Tip) / Number of People = What goes on each card.

Itemizing everything isn't worth the hassle. Friends are more important.
 
I almost always itemize unless the bill is under $25.

Going to dinner with friends whose taxes read $1mil+ while I am making 30k a year, ya no I can't be covering for dude.
 
Waiters here just automatically give individual checks to each person unless there is an obvious couple. I do not understand why I would pay for somebody else's food. And I would not want somebody else to pay for mine. Can't afford it? Don't go out.
 
Trouble said:
It's not about the dough. We all have plenty of money for eating at restaurants. It's about the hassle on both the serving staff and the diners.
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you should help them cook that shit too yo! it's not even about telling them anything, they usually ask upfront. when i want to deal with hassles myself, i can cook at home.
 
I always offer to pick up the tab, and everyone else usually hands me $20-40 in cash.

If they don't give me anything, I really don't care.

I go out to have a good time. Worrying too much about meticulously itemizing each bill...it's just a real hassle that ruins the mood.
 
Might the even-splitters who are so vehemently anti-itemized perhaps be a bit embarrassed about their math skills? Just throwing that out there.

I mean, really, it's eighth grade math. Takes me 30 seconds to split a bill in my head. And I don't think I'm some kind of savant either.
 
I make the restaurant provide separate checks. They generally don't argue now that computers do everything. Two decades ago, that was an issue, but I think enough short-paid checks convinced restaurants to split them off.
 
Depends on the situation and it's usually with my friends.

If we all order items that range in price, separate checks that are itemized. If we order stuff that's about the same price each, spilt evenly.

Never had any problems with either scenario. Unless we forget, we usually tell the waiter from the get-go that we'd like separate checks.
 
ChefRamsay said:
Might the even-splitters who are so vehemently anti-itemized perhaps be a bit embarrassed about their math skills? Just throwing that out there.

I mean, really, it's eighth grade math. Takes me 30 seconds to split a bill in my head. And I don't think I'm some kind of savant either.
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Nope. I can handle simple arithmetic. I'm over 30 now and don't need to squabble over small amounts of money. It's embarrassing watching people argue over who had the more expensive drink or who had one prawn more than the other person.

I don't mind paying to stop situations such as these.
 
If everyone got similarly priced items, no problem with splitting.

But I'm not about to split when I got a small amount of stuff and someone else went hog wild.
 
ChefRamsay said:
Might the even-splitters who are so vehemently anti-itemized perhaps be a bit embarrassed about their math skills? Just throwing that out there.

I mean, really, it's eighth grade math. Takes me 30 seconds to split a bill in my head. And I don't think I'm some kind of savant either.
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Yes, it's the difficulty of the math. Addition terrifies us and we hide our debilitating incompetence under a mantle of social grace.

Or maybe you have a problem with division.
 
it's usually pretty obvious if everyone had roughly similar things. If you show up late and have a drink only or whatever, nobody frowns at mentioning that.
 
As a broke 20-something, itemized.

I'm deciding what I'm getting depending on how much money I have, so I'm not paying for other people ordering more expensive meals or more drinks or dessert.
 
Split, always split.

Someone may throw in an extra few quid if they have had something expensive, or an extra course but never bother to do individual bills.
 
VOOK said:
Remember what you order, give the cash or transfer the money to the person paying. Easy.

I'm not paying for other peoples booze or $40 steaks.
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I don't drink, only ate a hamburger, got a split bill of $60 because others got steak and drinks.
 
The people who want to split are ALWAYS the people ordering top shelf booze, expensive starters and entrees, espressos, and desserts. Meanwhile my wife and I don't drink and tend to order lighter entrees with no starter or dessert. Far too many times we'd eat $30 worth of food and then be told our share of the split was $80. Fuck that.

With good friends we split, acquaintances we go sperate checks.
 
I hear in countries like the UK it's less common by restaurants to split the bill per item for each person? So they just give you the bill and your group has to figure it out, is that true?

Because it's stupid and you probably get a much higher tip if you deal with each person individually. (+people having to leave earlier than the rest etc.)
 
I don't think I ever was out with a group of people where the bill was split, everyone always pays for what they had. Except someone is treating the others and pays the whole bill.

It's not a thing to do here in Germany. You pay for what you had, period.
 
SolidusDave said:
I hear in countries like the UK it's less common by restaurants to split the bill per item for each person? So they just give you the bill and your group has to figure it out, is that true?

Because it's stupid and you probably get a much higher tip if you deal with each person individually. (+people having to leave earlier than the rest etc.)
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It can vary. Most restaurants will be happy to split it for you if you ask, some even ask "Are you paying together or separately?". It's good manners to tell the waiter/waitress beforehand if you intend to pay individually though.

It's also not really the done thing to tip at all in a restaurant here, outside of London at least anyway. Some restaurants in London are notorious for not only expecting a tip regardless of service, but just adding one onto the bill automatically and you then have to ask for it to be taken off. Basically they're trying to embarrass/shame you into tipping even if the service was nothing special.
 
Even split, always. But saying that, iI've never been in the company of someone at a dinner party who has ordered an insane lopsided amount of food and drink compared to everyone else.
Maybe that's a US thing, I don't know...
 
Lagamorph said:
Basically they're trying to embarrass/shame you into tipping even if the service was nothing special.
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Brits are basically shit at causing a fuss. I've had appalling service at a restaurant and because I was with others I said everything was "fine" when asked. Don't really want to be "that guy" kicking up a fuss.

We're a bunch of bitches. :D
 
Fuzzy said:
This is the problem we have with the Toronto-GAF meetups. We each just put in some money and then next thing we know we're tipping 40% so a few of us just take some back to get the tip down to the 20-25% level. :lol
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Not to mention we're already at that 40% tip before everyone had paid. First meetup I went to kraftwerk refuses my money because the tip was already over $100 and I'm like "dude, I ate/drank $40 worth of stuff". :lol
 
Every time my partner and I have done split, we've ended up paying at least double what we actually consumed because neither of us are big drinkers or eaters, so I much prefer itemised.

When we go to our regular place, we itemise the food and the big drinkers take turns to buy a keg, or everyone will grab items for the table. It works out well. In our regular group, some of the bigger dudes have around $100 of food and could go through a couple of kegs alone, and the smaller women might only have $20-30 worth and a glass of beer, so splitting would be really unfair.

If I had plenty of money, I'd love to be able to grab the whole bill. It's just that I'm poor as hell and I actually have to put money aside in advance to go out (and we don't get to do it very often). I actually look forward to the day when I could treat everyone and grab the whole bill, but that's just a pipe dream at the moment unless I want to be paying it off my credit card for the following months.

I think either way, if there's someone in your group who is being a dick about it, that's the real problem, not the actual method of paying.
 
Itemized, why the hell would I pay for things I didn't order? I'm ordering things I can afford, I'm not paying more then that. Separate bills are ideal when the place will do it.
 
If I'm with 8 people, and they're all getting an app, entree, dessert and two drinks (for $65 let's say - I'm in NYC and this can get expensive) and I get a lower priced entree and 1 drink ($25), no, I'm not paying $60 for this meal just because it's easier.

If things are a bit more comparable, I'm all for splitting.
 
I've never been to a place that didn't split the bill for you in an itemized fashion when requested.

Even if I have the money I don't want to pay for your shit unless I'm paying for everything (which I have done).
 
I remember an argument a few years ago at a family dinner over this, my Aunt/Uncle decided it would be fair if we split everything evenly despite their meals/drinks costing triple what anyone else's did.

It takes mere seconds to figure out what your own meal cost, not going to pay $50 extra because others don't want to do simple math.
 
I ask beforehand if the waiter/waitress can split it or I pay for the whole thing. I eat way more than everyone else anyway and usually no one carries cash.
 
Why would you have to itemize the bill?

Every time I go out with a group of people the server always brings everyone a separate bill for what they ordered.

No muss no fuss.
 
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