Back-In-Black
Banned
Alright, so if you didn't follow my last thread I'm currently on a rewatch of the prequel movies in reverse order. Last week was Revenge of the Sith and to the chagrin of many I made my opinion be known that I actually enjoyed it more than The Force Awakens. It's still a problematic movie but it has it's own highs and originality that surpasses TFA, in my opinion. But, that was last week's debate, now it's time to talk about Attack of the Clones. A little back story, it's been awhile since I've rewatched this movie. As a kid growing up I used to LOVE AOTC, mainly due to the end when all the Jedi show up. I thought that was so cool even if I didn't really understand why or what was happening. I would rewind that part of the DVD over and over watching all those Jedi light up their lightsabers and do battle. In fact, kid me would've rated AOTC pretty high.
However, kid me was a fucking idiot who didn't realize his errors til he sat down and watched the OT Special Edition all the way through. As a result, I went into this movie knowing it would be bad but figured it would probably be better than TPM, which even as a kid I didn't really like. Hell, I thought maybe I'd even low key like some stuff more than say TFA, and thus the film might echo some of my feelings towards ROTS. Then I rewatched the movie.
HO BOY! This movie is just pure trash. There is almost nothing redeemable about this movie. It's an absolute mess. Can one truly call this a film or rather just a sequence of events that happen in some semblance of an order. Nothing about this movie makes sense. Whose the villain? What are the Separatists? Why are people trying to kill Padme? How do these clones exist? Why does nobody give a shit about the existence of these clones? "It's very dangerous putting those two together." Then fucking DON'T. Who the fuck is Count Dooku? Why is Anakin already evil? Why is Obi-Wan a fucking brutish asshole? And on and on.
The last part really got me. If you watched the Plinkett review they briefly talk about the role reversal sometimes at play between Anakin and Obi-Wan. For example, Obi-Wan jumping out of the window to chase the assassin drone, it really should've been Anakin to do that. But, Obi-Wan continuously does these type of brutish, non-thinking actions throughout the film. I actually think the worst case of role reversal is at the end during the Genosian arena scene. So, a bunch of monsters get unleashed on our heroes and Obi-Wan ends up pitted against some spider type creature while Anakin gets the Bronco. What ends up happening is Anakin ends up taming the Bronco and riding it, you know finding a peaceful solution to the situation, whereas Obi-Wan immediately goes the violent route and ends up slaying the "monster." Shouldn't this be totally reversed. Jedi are supposed to respect life in all its forms. It's why they often ride around on crazy beasts instead of speeder bikes. Yet here Obi-Wan is all about murdering some tortured creature because he feel threatened. It's all crap.
Of course, the biggest crap part of the movie is the titular clones. They just break your brain when you think about it. First, these Kamino cloners have been making these clones for decades and they never thought to check with the Republic. How were they paid for in the first place? And, nobody noticed this massive build up? But, what's worse is everyone's reactions to the revelation of a Clone Army. First of all, they don't react with the massive shock that this is but instead are more concerned about the stupid Amidala assassination plot. However, the worst part is that nobody, not even the noble Jedi, question the morality of the use of the Clones. Listen, prior to this movie we had no idea cloning existed as a technology in Star Wars. And, the idea of cloning is an entire moral and philosophical debate in our current society. So now you're telling me that cloning not only exists but that the Republic and the entire Jedi Order, an order about respecting life in all its forms, is suddenly okay with the idea of an army of Clones being bred and raised to fight in a war? A war they have no say as to whether or not they get to fight in. Fuck you.
Pros:
None. Well, I'll give it one pro, I like the Coruscant chase scene. It starts off dumb but I really enjoy it, especially since it's about the only time in the film Anakin and Obi-Wan act like friends. They banter back and forth and joke around as they chase the assassin through LA Bladerunner in Star Wars. It looks cool and actually feels like a Space Adventure movie type sequence.
Cons:
Everything. PS2 Cutscene digital effects. Nonsensical plot. Horrendous dialogue and not even the "so bad it's good" kind, just bad dialogue. Yoda fighting. Boba Fett as a kid. Tone is all over the place. Stupid love story. Digital Sand, it's everywhere yet nowhere.
However, kid me was a fucking idiot who didn't realize his errors til he sat down and watched the OT Special Edition all the way through. As a result, I went into this movie knowing it would be bad but figured it would probably be better than TPM, which even as a kid I didn't really like. Hell, I thought maybe I'd even low key like some stuff more than say TFA, and thus the film might echo some of my feelings towards ROTS. Then I rewatched the movie.
HO BOY! This movie is just pure trash. There is almost nothing redeemable about this movie. It's an absolute mess. Can one truly call this a film or rather just a sequence of events that happen in some semblance of an order. Nothing about this movie makes sense. Whose the villain? What are the Separatists? Why are people trying to kill Padme? How do these clones exist? Why does nobody give a shit about the existence of these clones? "It's very dangerous putting those two together." Then fucking DON'T. Who the fuck is Count Dooku? Why is Anakin already evil? Why is Obi-Wan a fucking brutish asshole? And on and on.
The last part really got me. If you watched the Plinkett review they briefly talk about the role reversal sometimes at play between Anakin and Obi-Wan. For example, Obi-Wan jumping out of the window to chase the assassin drone, it really should've been Anakin to do that. But, Obi-Wan continuously does these type of brutish, non-thinking actions throughout the film. I actually think the worst case of role reversal is at the end during the Genosian arena scene. So, a bunch of monsters get unleashed on our heroes and Obi-Wan ends up pitted against some spider type creature while Anakin gets the Bronco. What ends up happening is Anakin ends up taming the Bronco and riding it, you know finding a peaceful solution to the situation, whereas Obi-Wan immediately goes the violent route and ends up slaying the "monster." Shouldn't this be totally reversed. Jedi are supposed to respect life in all its forms. It's why they often ride around on crazy beasts instead of speeder bikes. Yet here Obi-Wan is all about murdering some tortured creature because he feel threatened. It's all crap.
Of course, the biggest crap part of the movie is the titular clones. They just break your brain when you think about it. First, these Kamino cloners have been making these clones for decades and they never thought to check with the Republic. How were they paid for in the first place? And, nobody noticed this massive build up? But, what's worse is everyone's reactions to the revelation of a Clone Army. First of all, they don't react with the massive shock that this is but instead are more concerned about the stupid Amidala assassination plot. However, the worst part is that nobody, not even the noble Jedi, question the morality of the use of the Clones. Listen, prior to this movie we had no idea cloning existed as a technology in Star Wars. And, the idea of cloning is an entire moral and philosophical debate in our current society. So now you're telling me that cloning not only exists but that the Republic and the entire Jedi Order, an order about respecting life in all its forms, is suddenly okay with the idea of an army of Clones being bred and raised to fight in a war? A war they have no say as to whether or not they get to fight in. Fuck you.
Pros:
None. Well, I'll give it one pro, I like the Coruscant chase scene. It starts off dumb but I really enjoy it, especially since it's about the only time in the film Anakin and Obi-Wan act like friends. They banter back and forth and joke around as they chase the assassin through LA Bladerunner in Star Wars. It looks cool and actually feels like a Space Adventure movie type sequence.
Cons:
Everything. PS2 Cutscene digital effects. Nonsensical plot. Horrendous dialogue and not even the "so bad it's good" kind, just bad dialogue. Yoda fighting. Boba Fett as a kid. Tone is all over the place. Stupid love story. Digital Sand, it's everywhere yet nowhere.
