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[Houston3000]

My first boyfriend dumped me and was like "I think we'd be better off as just friends." That's the worst kind of friendzoning since you've actually gotten with the person you're crushing on and they're like "eh this is weird." I took it well though.

I don't know about that...

Practically every single time I dumped a girl I tell them we should be friends. Every - single - time unless we break up in some yelling match and, even then, I usually call them when everything's cooled down just to tell them that. Come to think of it, even when girls break up with me or wanna quit dating after a few times I always play the "Well, shit, we may not have romantic sparks but no reason we can't be friends" game. On no occasion do I actually ever contact these women again...

Spoiler

not while sober anyways

.

I've been "friendzoned" before, in the more traditional sense that is, I don't want to get into the gritty details because I was a pathetic wretch at the time and I'm embarrassed, but I understand the feeling. Looking back at that situation now though, it only makes me feel more confident seeing how much I've grown since then.

 

[Acrylamid]

There's one thing I felt was worse than getting friendzoned.

I fell in love with a girl and thought: "Well, even she isn't interested in a relationship with me, at least I will get a good friend out of it". I thought in the long run, either she will fall in love with me, too, or I will "fall out of" love and we could be friends. I thought she was just such a good person that I wanted to stay in contact with her, either as a partner (preferably) or as friend.
Turns out, she wasn't interested in a relationship with me. Also, she didn't want to be friends with me either, because "it wouldn't work out" when I had feelings for her. That was after we've talked to each other for five weeks and after she admitted that she felt we could talk really well with other.

I meet her last September and it was love (/infatuation) at first sight for me. I still think about her daily and hope I will lose my feelings for her soon because the pain of counterfactual thinking still hurts every time.

So, whenever someone complains about getting friendzoned, I put on bittersweet smile and try not to become cynical.

tl;dr: The one thing worse than getting friendzoned is accepting to get friendzoned and then getting shut off completely.

 

[Übermatik]

Does rejection count as the friend zone? Fucking... grumble grumble bah grumble.

 

[Vermillion]

I was nice to a girl and haz no secks in return!!

Rule #1: Be the opposite of nice if you want sex/a physical relationship.

 

[Fantomen]

Friendzoned just once, but it wasn't that bad. Just found another girl to have sex with.
I have friendzoned alot of girls though, most of them ugly

 

[Staccat0]

No such thing as a friend zone. Just a, "I think you are nice, but I don't wanna fuck you and you aren't that funny" zone.

Married my best friend. Feels good man.

 

[Devolution]

Rule #1: Be the opposite of nice if you want sex/a relationship.

1. Boys don't cry
2. It's better to be mad than sad
3. Don't get mad-get Even
4. Take it like a man
5. He who has the most toys wins
6. Ride or die, bros before hos
7. Size Matters
8. Don't stop to ask for directions
9. Nice guys finish last

 

[Vermillion]

No it's friendzone when you don't break up bitterly and still feel attracted to the person.

Friendzoned is when you're not even a candidate before the relationship. Not after a break-up.

 

[Gucci Messiah]

--> Ask girl to watch movie. Great success

--> Girl texts me and asks me to hang out just as much as I do to her. Everything going better than expected

--> Take girl on dinner date and pay for her. Go back to room and pound natty ice (college lol) then giver her favorite hoodie so she doesn't get covered in rain walking back to her place. Nice.

--> Have girl ask me to accompany her to bar/club. Already wasted but agree

--> Shows signs of jealousy when she talks to other guys. Blame it on the ah ah ah ah ah ah alcohol

--> Girls stops texting and doesn't return my calls. See her at party last weekend and am ignored hard. Blackout to forget failure. She keeps favorite hoodie. Feelsbadman

 

[Vermillion]

1. Boys don't cry
2. It's better to be mad than sad
3. Don't get mad-Get Even
4. Take it like a man
5. He who has the most toys wins
6. Ride or die, bros before hos
7. Size Matters
8. Don't stop to ask for directions
9. Nice guys finish last

Only the last one is true

Either way, I've noticed that girls respond better to teasing/mocking than kindness. But that's just personal experience - should I have to add this caveat, not all girls are the same.

 

[Devolution]

Only the last one is true

Either way, I've noticed that girls respond better to teasing/mocking than kindness. But that's just personal experience - should I have to add this caveat, not all girls are the same.

It's not true. Get over yourself.

 

[GhostWriter24]

That's the worst kind of friendzoning since you've actually gotten with the person you're crushing on and they're like "eh this is weird."

Agreed. I'm still good friends with the girl I crushed on back then (Im actually in her Fantasy Baseball League) but those following months after the hookup were torture.

 

[Vermillion]

It's not true. Get over yourself.

Caveats already listed include:

A) It's just from my personal experience
B) Not all girls are the same (or even most)

 

[Staccat0]

Only the last one is true

Either way, I've noticed that girls respond better to teasing/mocking than kindness. But that's just personal experience - should I have to add this caveat, not all girls are the same.

Dumb.

You might confuse this with women liking guys who are funny. Not the same as somehow not being "nice"

Caveats already listed include:

A) It's just from my personal experience
B) Not all girls are the same (or even most)

Fair enough, but boy do I get tired of world weary 21 year olds asserting it's all around them when it's only in their heads.
Usually "nice guys" are self absorbed losers. I used to be one.

 

[Log4Girlz]

I love being in the friendzone. If I can't get with a hot girl, damn I wanna be close anyway

 

[vicissitudes]

I dated this girl years ago but then I broke it off because I just wanted to be friends.

This other time I hooked up with a girl and went on a few dates but decided I didn't want to be more than friends so I stopped calling her.

 

[Devolution]

Dumb.

You might confuse this with women liking guys who are funny. Not the same as somehow not being "nice"

A lot of men just can't wrap their heads around the idea that if you're a doormat you sound, look and seem desperate. Who wants to be with someone who is starving for anything? I want to be with someone who wants me specifically not just A girlfriend in general.

 

[Vermillion]

I don't do nice things to get laid.

 

[ComputerMKII]

There's a girl I really, really like but she already referred to me as a friend before I could even reveal my feelings (not that I'd do it anytime soon given what had happened to me last year). However, I don't find any other girl interesting compared with her. Am I going to stay single forever?

 

[alphaNoid]

Never really been in the friendzone. But that because I never really held onto feelings for women. I just told them how I felt from the start and it saved me a lot of time. I might have been strung along a little bit when I was real young like 13 or something but no stories come to mind.

There's a girl I really, really like but she already referred to me as a friend before I could even reveal my feelings (not that I'd do it anytime soon given what had happened to me last year). However, I don't find any other girl interesting compared with her. Am I going to stay single forever?

The secret to women is making them want you, not convincing them to give you a chance.

Advice on this current girl? Stop talking to her.. completely. Put the ball in her court .. if she never looks for you .. neat she saved you a lot more heartache and time. If she calls and asks why you never come around, tell her the truth! "Because I have strong feelings for you, and its not fair to myself to let myself down. I'm doing whats right for me." Don't be afraid if she walks away forever. You have to look out for yourself, because if you don't ... who will?

hint : Nobody, especially not a woman is looking out for you. Start looking out for you!

When you fall down, pick yourself back up... and learn from your mistakes. It will make you a better person.. and being a better person makes you more attractive to females.

 

[Poindexter]

A lot of men just can't wrap their heads around the idea that if you're a doormat you sound, look and seem desperate. Who wants to be with someone who is starving for anything? I want to be with someone who wants me specifically not just A girlfriend in general.

Desperation is a stinky cologne. Everyone can smell it a mile away and it's not attractive.

 

[Vermillion]

Dumb.

You might confuse this with women liking guys who are funny. Not the same as somehow not being "nice"

Friends who are absolute dicks are pretty successful.

Not saying I'm unsuccessful, just that nicer guys are less successful.

 

[jon bones]

i got friendzoned once when i was like 12 or 13 with one of my mom's dance students (my mom is a dance teacher). then i got a girlfriend when i got to high school and figured it all out*.

nowadays i have a few girls who are friends (in addition to my girlfriend) - but there is generally some resolved/unresolved sexual tension with all of them.

*editors note: i have not "figured out" anything, really

 

[Nevasleep]

Either way, I've noticed that girls respond better to teasing/mocking than kindness.

That's because it's more fun. "Oh you're so great" gets boring, and you can't really respond to it.
Tell her you'll kick her ass if she doesn't do whatever (make sure to add an emoticon).

 

[Vermillion]

Desperation is a stinky cologne. Everyone can smell it a mile away and it's not attractive.

If I were desperate I'd have lowered my standards and lost my morals by now.

 

[Seraphinianus]

There's a girl I really, really like but she already referred to me as a friend before I could even reveal my feelings (not that I'd do it anytime soon given what had happened to me last year). However, I don't find any other girl interesting compared with her. Am I going to remain single forever?

you get over it. it's called "one-itis." The only cure is meeting other girls and realizing you're idolizing. It's a symptom of a particularly toxic friend-zoning, like my story above. You're seeing the stuff that resonates with your personality and not seeing anything else (in my case, someone with some pretty serious issues, which were in my face 24/7, but that I minimized badly. Other situations will be much less extreme, which I imagine would be harder to parse.)

 

[ohhthegore]

One summer I used to bang this one girl, but the only way she could get to my house was by having a friend drop her off. The guy who would give her rides had a crush on her and knew he was giving her rides so she could get laid with someone else but he still did it lol

 

[Vermillion]

That's because it's more fun. "Oh you're so great" gets boring, and you can't really respond to it. Tell her you'll kick her ass if she doesn't do whatever

I know this. Quite well, in fact. I'm just pointing out something, tho.

 

[DR2K]

I've put guys and girls in the friendzone. It sucks, but those are the rules of attraction.

 

[ComputerMKII]

you get over it. it's called "one-itis." The only cure is meeting other girls and realizing you're idolizing. It's a symptom of a particularly toxic friend-zoning, like my story above. You're seeing the stuff that resonates with your personality and not seeing anything else (in my case, someone with some pretty serious issues, which were in my face 24/7, but that I minimized badly.)

Are you actually referring to this?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crystallization_(love)

 

[Seraphinianus]

Are you actually referring to this?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crystallization_(love)

a quick skim tells me that's pretty right on.

I've put guys and girls in the friendzone. It sucks, but those are the rules of attraction.

yeah, it does suck. met this one chick who was very nice and had some stuff in common with me...but she had a kid. Would've definitely given her a shot if it weren't for that. Felt like an ass after, but that's the game :\ she deserves someone who wants that, not someone who would try to just keep it at bay.

 

[Ploid 3.0]

i got friendzoned once when i was like 12 or 13 with one of my mom's dance students (my mom is a dance teacher). then i got a girlfriend when i got to high school and figured it all out*.

nowadays i have a few girls who are friends (in addition to my girlfriend) - but there is generally some resolved/unresolved sexual tension with all of them.

*editors note: i have not "figured out" anything, really

I like the on edge cat fight situation that can happen. Not being in a relationship with either but you can smell the jealousy when one flirts a bit much in the other's presence with you playing with said flirt. You can't get in trouble since you're not dating either of them, though you may be the target of frustration, however using mental judo you can push that anger in your favor.

 

[Furio53]

Rule #1: Be the opposite of nice if you want sex/a relationship.

No.

Be confident.

 

[Hylian7]

If I ever get frienzoned I swear that I'll commit sudoku...

There's a certain DS game that comes to mind right now, but saying which one would spoil it. Those that have played it probably know what I'm talking about. The ending involves sudoku.

 

[Ploid 3.0]

Isn't sudoku a game? Do you guys mean samurai seppuku?

 

[Gucci Messiah]

No.

Be confident.

No. Be a jerk if you just want a physical relationship.

 

[jasonng]

There's a certain DS game that comes to mind right now, but saying which one would spoil it. Those that have played it probably know what I'm talking about. The ending involves sudoku.

The ending lost a lot of impact on me because I was struggling beforehand only to have that when I find sudoku stupidly easy. Still a fucking amazing game.

 

[Vermillion]

Fair enough, but boy do I get tired of world weary 21 year olds asserting it's all around them when it's only in their heads.
Usually "nice guys" are self absorbed losers. I used to be one.

18.

 

[Seraphinianus]

Isn't sudoku a game? Do you guys mean samurai seppuku?

fgc meme. sudoku watch = seppuku watch = suicide watch.

 

[Vermillion]

No. Be a jerk if you just want a physical relationship.

Ah, there we go. I'm going to agree with this moreso.

 

[Furio53]

No. Be a jerk if you just want a physical relationship.

Haha, no you're completely wrong.
Girls like assholes, women like men.

 

[Baby Milo]

after high school(your friends anyway because your around each other everyday) I learned to bail the fuck out when it became obvious nothing was gonna happen

 

[Ploid 3.0]

fgc meme. sudoku watch = seppuku watch = suicide watch.

Ah lol

 

[Gucci Messiah]

Haha, no you're completely wrong.
Girls like assholes, women like men.

Good thing I'm in college. So as I said before, if you want sex be a douche.

 

[B1gg_Randall]

She was single when she asked me, "how's your sex life?" I joked that it was, "aight," and "under control."

Now whenever I crash at her place, she bangs her new BF very loudly.

Damn....

 

[Vermillion]

Haha, no you're completely wrong.
Girls like assholes, women like men.

Ah, there we go. I'm still around girls.

 

[Malajax]

In short, we became really good friends, but before I could tell her how I felt she went on and on about how she hates guys and dating and only wants to be friends.

We remain really close friends. I think she has a pretty good idea of what I felt, but that's in the past. She's really one of the best friends I've ever had and I wouldn't trade it for the world right now.

There are other stories, but they're far more pathetic.

 

[Shogmaster]

What if it's friends with benefits zone? That's where I'm at now with my GF friend. No more seeing if we should spend the rest of our lives together. Just good company and sex.

 

[Devolution]

 

[Vermillion]

What if it's friends with benefits zone? That's where I'm at now with my GF friend. No more seeing if we should spend the rest of our lives together. Just good company and sex.

My friend's roommate has a relationship like that. It's cool for both of them since neither want to be in a relationship right now.