• Hey Guest. Check out your NeoGAF Wrapped 2025 results here!

Theres a bear in my camp site

Status
Not open for further replies.
Feed it hot tub
K0Rxi.jpg
 
Scrow said:
jump up and down in your tent, screaming and flashing a torch light on and off to scare it away.

are attract it to you, i'm not sure
Click to expand...

This is actually sorta true

OP most likely saw an American Black Bear*, since the Brown Bear is extirpated in Saskatchewan. If you find yourself being attacked, DO NOT PLAY DEAD! That only works with grizzly bears, not Black Bears. You have to fight back.**

*telling difference between brown bear and black bear (color varies greatly within each species and isn't a valid indicator): Black bears have pointy ears, brown bears have rounded ears. Grizzly bears have a giant shoulder hump. Grizzly bears have a more concave profile (between eyes and tip of nose) while black bears have a straight line.

**If you die, I take no responsibility.
 
Hang on, what's this dude doing camping alone? Camping, eating some food and going to sleep? That's fucking heartbreaking.

Pity it's all a lie, but fun nonetheless

WARDAMELLUNS!
Brazil-Zoo_Stew.jpg
 
Koodo said:
Neither Bell, Telus or Rogers seem to have coverage in Northern Saskatchewan.

Wind doesn't have coverage anywhere

How was the post even created.
Click to expand...


I'd be willing to bet "Northern Saskatchewan" is a bit north of Prince Albert.


There is nothing past the middle of Saskatchewan except scattered fly-in indian reserves.
 
Pelt it with peanuts, melons, bread, or any other source of food you may have on your person. Teach it who runs that campsite.
 
POWERSPHERE said:
Hang on, what's this dude doing camping alone? Camping, eating some food and going to sleep? That's fucking heartbreaking.
Click to expand...
Well you need to put your food away in a bear bucket and hang it if you are out somewhere where bears are about. I hope the dude is ok, but it is legendary to post this on GAF if true.
 
xxracerxx said:
Well you need to put your food away in a bear bucket and hang it if you are out somewhere where bears are about. I hope the dude is ok, but it is legendary to post this on GAF if true.
Click to expand...
I thought it was called a bear bag... I hope the OP is okay though.
 
Instro said:
Guys, we should start looking up camp sites in that area and call the park ranger. It's the only way to be sure OP is ok!

This post will look great on the news when OP turns up dead
Click to expand...

I'm actually kind of scared for OP. I'm so gullible, though. What would detective GAF do in this situation? My God if OP ends up dead this thread would look horrible. He must have a phone if he's posting on GAF right? On the one hand I'm hoping this is a go ly down moment. On the other hand what if OP just experienced one of those I Shouldn't Be Alive tv show like moments? Logistically speaking it would turn into a search and rescue effort. How long would we wait before someone calls the park service there? I say if we don't hear back in the next 5-12 hours, maybe someone should call? I'm being completely stupid, though, right? Seriously, OP you better not be dead or mortally wounded. If you still have hands just post something. If you are horribly mauled and no longer have hands try to use your nose or something, assuming that wasn't torn off too and you are writhing in pain.
 
I´m actually surprised by the overwhelming amount of joke replies in this topic. Maybe it´s an American thing, but as a European, I´d be scared shitless if a wild bear appeared in front of me. Hope OP is okay.
 
Sennorin said:
I´m actually surprised by the overwhelming amount of joke replies in this topic. Maybe it´s an American thing, but as a European, I´d be scared shitless if a wild bear appeared in front of me. Hope OP is okay.
Click to expand...
Main reason there's joke replies is because he made a thread about it on an internet forum. Like posting while your house is on fire...

Going to bed... hope this guy is ok, also the bear.
 
People keep posting jokes and thats fine, I guess but in case you end up dead I want to say something real before page 3.

1. Don't provoke it.
2. Don't run. Back away slowly. Maybe climb a tree if you can and have time.
3. Appear large.
4. Be loud and talk a lot. (everyone needs to do this)
5. bang pots and pans. Even jump around.
7. Last resort, fire scares them.
EDIT! 7.5 If the bear attacks you. Attack it with a weapon and be ruthless. Give it everything you have to scare it off, but if shit gets real....
8. play dead and cover your vitals. the others need to have your back and should still e wailing on the bear. Grizzly bears are more likely to attack out of defense, and will often give up when you play dead and they realize you aren't here to fight. This is less the case with black bears, but if you are going to lose the fight, cover your vitals and let your friends scare it off.
9. After he leaves, get rid of what ever lured him by doing a bear bag or putting it in your truck far from camp (he'll maybe fuck your car up)

Also, its better to call 911, give them your GPS coordinates or whatever and end up being humiliated when you need them, than trying to get in touh with them as your friend dies or is being mauled.
This is advice my friend (a 911 dispatcher) gave me after we had a run in with a bear in Washington.
 
Heavy said:
Main reason there's joke replies is because he made a thread about it on an internet forum. Like posting while your house is on fire...

Going to bed... hope this guy is ok, also the bear.
Click to expand...
Seriously. The fuck is your first reaction to go to the internet for advice?

"Hey guess who has a killer in their house G, A, or Me? Yeah its me. So what should I do? Call the police? I don't know I've never been in this situation before. Maybe I should ask him, he seems like hes done this before. BRB."
 
GillianSeed79 said:
I'm actually kind of scared for OP. I'm so gullible, though. What would detective GAF do in this situation? My God if OP ends up dead this thread would look horrible. He must have a phone if he's posting on GAF right? On the one hand I'm hoping this is a go ly down moment. On the other hand what if OP just experienced one of those I Shouldn't Be Alive tv show like moments? Logistically speaking it would turn into a search and rescue effort. How long would we wait before someone calls the park service there? I say if we don't hear back in the next 5-12 hours, maybe someone should call? I'm being completely stupid, though, right? Seriously, OP you better not be dead or mortally wounded. If you still have hands just post something. If you are horribly mauled and no longer have hands try to use your nose or something, assuming that wasn't torn off too and you are writhing in pain.
Click to expand...
Dude, its just a bear messing up his campsite, its an extremely common occurance
 
"Hey, I'm out in the middle of nowhere in the middle of the night and I just heard what sounds like a huge fucking animal higher on the food chain than me rummaging around outside! To the internet!"

Yeah, that's the reasonable and logical course of action everyone would take.

OP is fine and having a good laugh.

or

OP is mauled and looking down thinking he should have used the last few minutes in life doing something more useful than letting a gaming forum know there was a bear in his camp site.
 
Qwomo said:
Yeah, the overreaction in here is pretty amusing.
Click to expand...
IMO, bears should aways be taken seriously. Any experienced backpacker would agree.
When dealing with shit that can kill you (and bears kill people all the time) its best to observe a little bit of concern.
I mean, people shouldn't panic and lose their shit, but being too casual about it gets people killed...
SO I don't know. Not really a ton of overreaction in this thread. Very little actually.

Probably a joke post, but its not like we should all expect more of people
KuGsj.gif
 
You should be safe.

Just be happy you're not in Australia and it's not a drop bear. Regular bears are like pussy cats next to drop bears.

I mean look at this: http://australianmuseum.net.au/Drop-Bear

Drop Bears hunt by ambushing ground dwelling animals from above, waiting up to as much as four hours to make a surprise kill. Once prey is within view, the Drop Bear will drop as much as eight metres to pounce on top of the unsuspecting victim. The initial impact often stuns the prey, allowing it to be bitten on the neck and quickly subdued.

If the prey is small enough Drop Bears will haul it back up the tree to feed without harassment from other predators.
Click to expand...
 
Staccat0 said:
People keep posting jokes and thats fine, I guess but in case you end up dead I want to say something real before page 3.

1. Dn't provoke it.
2. Don't run.
3. Appear large.
4. Be loud and talk a lot. (everyone needs to do this)
5. bang pots and pans. Even jump around.
7. Last resort, fire scares them.
8. If he attacks, play dead and cover your vitals. the others need to have your back.
9. After he leaves, get rid of what ever lured him by doing a bear bag or putting it in your truck far from camp (he'll maybe fuck your car up)

Also, its better to call 911, give them your GPS coordinates or whatever and end up being humiliated when you need them, than trying to get in touh with them as your friend dies or is being mauled.
This is advice my friend (a 911 dispatcher) gave me after we had a run in with a bear in Washington.
Click to expand...

DO NOT LISTEN TO THIS MAN HE WILL GET YOU KILLED! If you play dead, you will die since this is more than likely a black bear.
 
I'm actually kind of freaking out now. According to the time stamp it's been 90 minutes since OP posted I think. You can't just make a topic like this as a GAF member and not update OP if you are okay. I don't care about pictures or embarrasment, I just want to know if a fellow gaffer is okay. It's 2:16 am EST. I went to work today at 10 a.m. today. I'm an atheist, but fuck I'm going to have to pull out the old Catholic hand book and say a prayer for OP. I'm exhausted and going to bed, so this better not be bullshit. I only pray once every blue moon.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Similar threads

Bear attacks in Japan
23
991
poodaddy replied
Visiting my daughter in Minnesota...
35
1K
lughnasadh123 replied
The Fifth Element | My return to a fun film
2
59
410
ReBurn replied
I am expert in japanese history, ask me anything. (Proof of my knowledge is in the picture)
Social 
3
195
Tertullian replied
A message to my 40+ old gaffers and gamers
2
81
2K
lachesis replied
Top Bottom