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[Yager]

My mother got pregnant when she was 15; my father was 17. Obviously they were not in love. Once I was born, the first couple of years my mother lived with my father's family. When I was about 2 years old, they broke up. My father took my mother to the court recaliming the coustody, saying that my mother's house and family was not good for raising a child. Lucky me, he lost.

I've always knew my father was kind of a douchebag, but when I found out about this, I almost stopped talking to him. We barely speak to each other (he lives in Argentina, I live in Barcelona) since that day, and it's been 2 and a half years since I last saw him.

And of course, it's difficult for me to think about my mother when she was young. A couple of years back I was wearing this Sepultura t-shirt, and she told me "Sepultura? I had a boyfriend once that liked them". I almost burned it.

 

[ArjanN]

You...found a contraceptive in your parents' bedroom and confronted your mother about it?

So very this.

I pull it out and I ask her, "Mom, what...is this?"

Seriously, in what universe would doing this ever lead to a positive result?

 

[Devolution]

I never understood how people could be that weirded out by their parents fucking. I'd hope to have as good a sex life as my parents do at their age, shit.

 

[Volimar]

When my mom was a teenager, her step dad used to get drunk and beat the shit out of her. He even shot her dog, when my mom was given permission by my grandma to go somewhere with friends. Since my grandmother had to work late a lot of nights, it left my mom to face her step dad more or less alone. So she ran away. To Florida. From Ohio. More than once. Hitchhiked both times. Ended up sleeping under bridges and eating at church handout places.

Blows my mind.

 

[KO Traveling Hobo]

You...found a contraceptive in your parents' bedroom and confronted your mother about it?

This was my reaction. I totally understand the "woah, my parents have sex" thing, but what on earth would possess you to ask her about it?

 

[Gustav]

You...found a contraceptive in your parents' bedroom and confronted your mother about it?

Came in to post this. What the hell dude?

 

[Ogni-XR21]

You...found a contraceptive in your parents' bedroom and confronted your mother about it?

I was about to ask this. Just let it be...

I once found my mom's vibrator, I sure as hell did not ask her what she needed it for.

 

[Shadybiz]

I am surprised that mine are still together after 35 yrs of bickering constantly. I think they'd both be better off divorced, honestly..don't know why they haven't; it's clear that they resent each other. I guess they figure that since they're around 60 now, why bother?

 

[Devolution]

OP should just be grateful he found a condom instead of other things.

 

[Erasus]

You're surprised you parents had sex? What the fuck

This. What the hell dude, you sound like 12.

 

[Wazzim]

I still know it surprised me back when when I learned that my dad used to get drunk and screw women.

Guess being Muslim and living in a Muslim country didn't stop him.

 

[BGBW]

I'm surprised my mum hasn't managed to buy all the world's books at the rate she picks things up from weekly jumble sales.

 

[Volimar]

I'm surprised my mum hasn't managed to buy all the world's books at the rate she picks things up from weekly jumble sales.

I honestly think my mom's dream job would be to go to yard sales and pick up old stuff, clean and refinish them, and then sell them in an antique style store.

 

[lednerg]

My parents were hippies, my dad being in a rock band and my mom, an artist. There was nothing for me to ever be surprised about, it all went with the territory, lol.

 

[Impeccable]

I'm surprised my mum hasn't managed to buy all the world's books at the rate she picks things up from weekly jumble sales.

Hoarders?

 

[Volimar]

My parents were hippies, my dad being in a rock band and my mom, an artist. There was nothing for me to ever be surprised about, it all went with the territory, lol.

Alex P. Keaton?

 

[Gustav]

How old are you, OP?

 

[CrudeDiatribe]

Oh, I guess when I realized that my dad was prominent in his field. That kinda blew my mind.

My mother too. My dad casts a long shadow too, but isn't as prominent.

I never understood how people could be that weirded out by their parents fucking. I'd hope to have as good a sex life as my parents do at their age, shit.

Yeah, exactly.

 

[Cyrillus]

Please tell me OP is 15...I refuse to believe a grown-ass man is this naive.

Then again, I've never understood being weirded out by your parents having sex.

 

[BGBW]

Hoarders?

Hoarder. My dad would rather rid the house of most things.

As a result I'e pick up my mother's hoarding trait but I'm far more cautious about buying anything I may not need.

 

[lednerg]

Alex P. Keaton?

Lol, yeah. Minus all the Reagan worshiping.

 

[ascii42]

Not a particular moment, but although I knew my dad was in a frat and my mom was in a sorority, I never really gave it much thought until I was in college. At some point, it really hit me that my parents were once college students just like I was.

 

[.GqueB.]

How did you find out?

It was a couple of years ago. My mom said something shitty about my dad because of something sleazy. I forget what it was exactly. I think he was trying to sleep with someone she didn't like. But when I told him this he said "Oh please she can't say anything. You know what we used to do?!" And then he told me.

It was a strange moment.

 

[jgmo870]

I was surprised to hear that my dad was engaged twice before meeting my mom and that my mom turned down her cousin's marriage proposal because she didn't like his shoes. I would have declined for a completely different reason...

 

[Galang]

Why would you confront your mom about having a condom? She's a grown woman... you probably made her feel incredibly uncomfortable to ask that at your age.

 

[AceOcelot]

Your father eats pussy and your mom sucks cock.

Let it sink in.

Fuck, man.

No.

But damn.

 

[FreeMufasa]

I don't know GAF. Today when my friend told me the tale of her little brother walked in on her parents doing the deed, I was reminded of what happened only months ago. You see, my parents are Asian. As in, old generation stereotypical "you better do good in school or I no send you to college" type Asian. I mean, I realize my very existence implies they've done the deed once, and my sister implies they've done it at least twice then. But these two argue all the time. It seems like they hate each other. Sex would be miserable between these two. There's no way...

Then, I go to brush my teeth in the bathroom when I realize there's no more toothpaste. So I go to the master bedroom that belongs to my parents and open the drawer. As I scrummage through all the supplies, something catches my eye. I thought it was an alcohol patch thing.

I don't even remember if it was the right type, but it was definitely a Trojan condom.

What? It couldn't be mine, because I'm a fucking virgin. It probably wasn't my 10 year old sister's. And no one else lived in the house aside from my parents.

Right on cue, my mom comes in to do her make up and I continue scrummaging as if I hadn't seen it yet. After a half a minute, I slow down and my mom notices. I pull it out and I ask her, "Mom, what...is this?"

She doesn't turn from the mirror and acts like it's nothing, "Hmm, I don't know."

I give her quite the quizzical look, and then put it back and leave the room.

The next day, I check to see if it's still there. It's gone.

Stereotypical Asian parents going at it. Wow.

So GAF, one-up me. What are things that surprised you about your parents?

Hahahahahahaahaha

 

[Nezumi]

Wow, I wonder how it would have felt to be a teenager and be surprised that your parents have sex...
First time I caught my mother doing stuff with my stepdad I must've been about eight or so. They were making a hell of lot noise and I got annoyed, so I ran into the bedroom screaming at them to shut the fuck up (not exactly my words, but I was quite rude). Admittingly the fact that they were standing (!) there nacked was a bit unnerving, but hey, mother got me a nice book about how babies were made the next day, told me to read it and write an essay about what I have learned (I remember quite clear how she corrected some of my more clumsy phrasing).
After that they just went on having noise sex, which was particulary nice when we had to share a bedroom for a few month...

Oh and don't think my dad was any better, because his new wife was even louder than my mother...

And don't get my started on drugs, because that would take a while. Let's just say that pot was the first distinctive smell I can remember.

So, to answer your question. No there is absolutly nothing my parents could ever do or say to me that would surprise me in any way.

 

[mclem]

The discovery that they got together by basically covering up for two friends who were having a clandestine affair.

 

[eso76]

I was born because my father was too late pulling out.
Heh, I wasn't too shocked.

 

[kai3345]

My Dad (typical southern overweight white ~buisnessman~) told me he was a crazy partyer in college and did a bunch of drugs and shit. He's the exact opposite type of person I would imagine doing that stuff.

Also, he was in the Guiness Book of World Records for world's longest ping pong game in college. But he never really kept that secret.

 

[Beautifully Shaped Monsters]

So I never knew my dad, but my mum had several long term relationships, and she was always a bit reserved, thinking back, probably because she wasn't that happy.

So anyway, when I was 21 she finally meets a guy she really likes, and I'm really happy for her, she even marries the guy and they are still together. Awesome.

So awkwardsness #1 - He flirts with her openly while I'm around, and even alludes to their sexlife.

#2: I found out after they been together for a couple years that he was junkie in the 80s and early 90s.

#3: a couple of years ago I found out that during those year he contracted HIV. It has never evolved into AIDS since he takes the necessary drug (and has been lucky I guess) but it surprised me.

Despite all that I'm happy for them both. He's a great guy and they are obviously happy together.

 

[GotEmRunnin]

My sister got married in August, and since then my parents have given her a little over 10k to help with bills and what not. my parents used to be tight with money.

 

[Watevaman]

To be honest, nothing. My parents have always been open and I don't think they're hiding anything.

Edit: I lucked out with parent sex, though. My dad had a stroke when I was 5 so none of listening to that growing up.

 

[Beerman462]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4VcO-IV8Q_w&feature=youtube_gdata_player

" Did you ever wonder if your mom gave dad a blowjob right before she kissed you good night?"

I was surprised to find out my parents were early tech adopters. We had a laserdisc in 1981. Then we switch to vhs because it became dominant. My parents felt burnt. So after that they would not adopt CD's or DVD's until they were dominant in the market.

 

[Gustav]

What? It couldn't be mine, because I'm a fucking virgin. It probably wasn't my 10 year old sister's. And no one else lived in the house aside from my parents.

That's the well known virgin paradox.

 

[Baraka in the White House]

That money was actually really tight in our household when I was growing up. It didn't feel like it at the time, which I guess means they did a great job as parents.

 

[RionaaM]

Wow, I wonder how it would have felt to be a teenager and be surprised that your parents have sex...
First time I caught my mother doing stuff with my stepdad I must've been about eight or so. They were making a hell of lot noise and I got annoyed, so I ran into the bedroom screaming at them to shut the fuck up (not exactly my words, but I was quite rude). Admittingly the fact that they were standing (!) there nacked was a bit unnerving, but hey, mother got me a nice book about how babies were made the next day, told me to read it and write an essay about what I have learned (I remember quite clear how she corrected some of my more clumsy phrasing).
After that they just went on having noise sex, which was particulary nice when we had to share a bedroom for a few month...

Are you by any chance related to this guy?

 

[.GqueB.]

That money was actually really tight in our household when I was growing up. It didn't feel like it at the time, which I guess means they did a great job as parents.

Same for me actually. My mom told me that our place was technically gov't housing since she made so little. We were pretty much poor but I would've NEVER known given how we lived.

 

[TheKaeptain]

Idk nothing really surprises me about them. My dad has always been very open with me about his past and my mother hasn't really done shit. I figured out at a young age that they had two biological children so they must have had sex.

 

[Gustav]

My father was in military prison for disobeying orders.

 

[Yoshichan]

I'm in love with this thread.

 

[Broder Salsa]

It surprised me when I found out how terrible my mom finances are and how bad she is at running it. Other than that not much, parents have been pretty open about most stuff.

 

[GasProblem]

When I was 18 my sis told me my mom had two miscarriages, one before my sister was born, and one before I was born. One time when my dad was a bit tipsy on holiday I heard him talking with my uncle about how he still visits and cleans up their graves.

My parents never talked about it, atleast not with me. Don't think I would've ever found out if my sister hadn't told me.

Oh, and that my dad was a hippie who grew weed (think he did lsd as well) and that he spent a month in a monestary to think what he wanted with his life. Although it didn't really surprise me :lol My dad is the smartest man I've ever met so he turned out ok

I don't think there are any more surprises to be had. My parents are pretty cool.

 

[NathanMcMahon]

That they are human and make major mistakes like anybody. It's a major mindfuck when you realize how frail they actually are.

 

[Borgnine]

Why did the mom leave the room in the OP, totally killed my boner.

I know some things about mom and dad, but nothing surprising. They did coke, I discovered dad was having an affair and mom doesn't know and he doesn't know that I know, mom owned a pair of crotchless panties.

 

[RSLYG]

That "news at 11" shit reply need to be stop.

On topic, my mom actually pretty good at drawing, I only see her draw once.

 

[Alucrid]

I am surprised that mine are still together after 35 yrs of bickering constantly. I think they'd both be better off divorced, honestly..don't know why they haven't; it's clear that they resent each other. I guess they figure that since they're around 60 now, why bother?

I kinda thought this but now that everyone is out of the house and they're taking vacations every month and shit.

 

[Omegasquash]

My old man was a drunk, planted drugs in my mothers car after their divorce, dug through the trash to find her used underwear and then told my brother and I that the man she was having sex with was hurting her, typed up and tried (poorly) to produce "documentation" that my (now former) stepfather was a pedophile, told us that our mother was committing adultery and that she would burn in hell and he didn't want that to happen, and didn't come through in contributing to my brothers college education at all.

When I was 16, my brother told my parents that I was an atheist because he was mad at me (for something, I don't know), and when confronted I confirmed that it was true. My father locked me in my bedroom with him and beat me, literally throwing me across the room. My mother called me a pussy when I had the audacity to bring up that it was wrong later that week (something that she acknowledges now was very wrong, and has apologized for it).

When my brother and I were on the way to tee ball as lads, my brother pushed in the cigarette lighter. Apparently this angered my father so much that he felt the need to nearly use said lighter to burn my brother's finger. Oh, and he regularly drank beer when he drove, with us in the car.

I could go on and on.

The surprising part about all this is that when I got away from my family, I finally learned that his behavior was wrong. I stopped talking to him nearly 10 years ago. He has not met his grandchildren, nor has he met my wife. I have no plans on letting him do so, though I have sent pictures of my son, and probably will do so for my daughter as well.

 

[Gregorn]

My dad made my mum have an abortion with a baby that she wanted to keep. I remember playing video games and telling my mum that I wished I had a brother to play with and she started to cry, which was weird, but now I know why.