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What have you learned about yourself recently?

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Sidney Prescott

Unconfirmed Member
I've come to realise lately I'm a very self-absorbed person. I started to seriously think deeply about it when O-N-E O-N-E brought it up a while back (which I'm thankful for by the way). Even this thread feels that way, but I thought maybe it would open up some good conversation and it helps to get it off my chest. I also would appreciate some advice perhaps?

It has took me a bit of time to have some self-awareness about it, but I now understand how it could be seen as a bad trait to others and how I hope to change that in the future. Let me start off by saying that it isn't intentional. I'm not an egotistical person at all, I often don't think highly of myself at all. It has took me a while to give some much needed self-love.

My self-absorption comes from my anxiety and irrational thinking, and how I constantly view myself as the center of the universe. My problems seem much bigger than they probably actually are.

When I hear about someone else going through a huge struggle, it jolts me awake and makes me realise I'm not the only person that struggles with their life. There is many people out there going through much worse.

I realise that when I talk to someone that the conversation always finds a way to come back to me and my problems, and when I think about that it makes it apparent how I talk about myself far too often.

Rather than responding to what that person said and focusing on them alone, I tend to spin the conversation back to me and find ways to relate. It comes across as conceited, egotistical and self-absorbed and I don't even mean to do it. I'm far too in to my own head that I push others away without even intending to do so.

I'm insecure as well. I try to be liked by everyone, and put on this fake mask at times. I try to act like how I think people would want me to act. I realise that is impossible to achieve and I should just focus more on being a geniune person.

Anyways, enough about me (for once!). What are some things you have learned about yourself lately? Positive or negative. How would you hope to change that if it's a bad habit/trait?
 

GAMETA

Banned
Jun 3, 2014
2,716
3,790
905
"Let me tell you how self absorbed I am"

Yep :messenger_tears_of_joy:



Jk, I am too, and I notice it when posting... it's always about myself, my feelings, my wants and what nots. I find it boring and pedantic, so sometimes I'll delete everything I wrote and flood a one liner or smartass post.
 
S

Sidney Prescott

Unconfirmed Member
Ive realised im actually stronger minded than i thought. Decided to do a clean living march ie no beer junk food etc and ive suprised myself how im doing so far although to be fair its still early days haha.
Yeah, you can surprise yourself sometimes. Keep it up. :goog_cool:

I have been restraining myself from using the internet more lately, and it's hard but with a bit of willpower and a website blocker as added support, I have been getting better with it. It is one of my goals for 2021.
"Let me tell you how self absorbed I am"

Yep :messenger_tears_of_joy:



Jk, I am too, and I notice it when posting... it's always about myself, my feelings, my wants and what nots. I find it boring and pedantic, so sometimes I'll delete everything I wrote and flood a one liner or smartass post.
breaking bad oops GIF


I can relate, my guy. I nearly deleted this post and had thoughts about it. I wasn't sure how the thread would come across to others. I'm sure your posts aren't as bad as you make them out in your head.
 
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S

Sidney Prescott

Unconfirmed Member
Ran my first half marathon today. Never would have thought it was possible before. I owe a great deal to David Goggins and the FitGaf crew. Lots of inspiration in that community thread.

I have learned a lot from Joe's older episodes. Some people say podcasts are a waste of time, but I disagree. I think it is one of the best ways you could spend your time online.

Joe had a sleeping expert on once that really opened my eyes up to my habits, and I'm still working on that. It is helpful to be exposed to a problem you have. I realised a lot of my problems came back to not sleeping well.

 

12Goblins

Lil’ Gobbie
Mar 1, 2017
4,248
7,023
715
I have learned a lot from Joe's older episodes. Some people say podcasts are a waste of time, but I disagree. I think it is one of the best ways you could spend your time online.

Joe had a sleeping expert on once that really opened my eyes up to my habits, and I'm still working on that. It is helpful to be exposed to a problem you have. I realised a lot of my problems came back to not sleeping well.


Yeah after that episode I am def trying to cut back on the cannabis before bed. The dreams suck for a while tho 😔
 

Ionian

Member
Apr 25, 2013
2,106
2,601
745
As the eldest child, I've had to interject myself in many things family related, still to this day. Lose sleep over it.

Could handle it then, until I couldn't. Went on a binge of trying out what all these crazy drugs and alcohol is. (Had no idea what I was doing but happens when you go down that path).

OP please see a counselor and remember you're important. It isn't easy to start if you feel down but being able to smile again is immeasurable beyond the cost of a few visits.

Stay in there buddy. <3
 
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Kenpachii

Member
Mar 23, 2018
7,042
8,479
765
Got a god complex, my sister explained she had one and named all the things i basically also do. So i guess i can join that bill. Probably also explains why we clash so much to the point we can't even be near eachother for more then a hour.
 
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Ozzy Onya A2Z

Member
Apr 16, 2012
9,351
3,124
970
Melbourne, Australia
I've learned to get my patience back. I used to be a super patient person. The last decade of having kids and a company shifted me into being "snappy". I have found patience within myself again. There is a clarity that comes with that and it is helping me drive some personal, as well as family, goals this year.
 
S

Sidney Prescott

Unconfirmed Member
As the eldest child, I've had to interject myself in many things family related, still to this day. Lose sleep over it.

Could handle it then, until I couldn't. Went on a binge of trying out what all these crazy drugs and alcohol is. (Had no idea what I was doing but happens when you go down that path).

OP please see a counselor and remember you're important. It isn't easy to start if you feel down but being able to smile again is immeasurable beyond the cost of a few visits.

Stay in there buddy. <3
You're kind.

For the most part, I'm actually doing better. Lately I've been forcing myself to go out more. Started working out, eating better. Just trying to build that confidence up and become a better person, really.
 

poodaddy

Member
May 2, 2015
4,850
1,005
780
Washington
I'm better off on my own. Two failed marriages. When lockdown is over, fuck buddy is furthest I want a relationship to go.
I legit cannot fathom this. Not coming at you, just saying I envy your bravery in a sense. I'm on my second marriage, we've been married ten and a half years and my first wife and I fell apart at three years. I am 33 and three quarters years old, and I've been married a total of 13 and a half years, and I was in a long term relationship before that for a year. Ya know that song Addicted to Love? Yeah, it's about me lol. I can't live without someone to wrap myself in, and the heart break when it ends is just too fucking much for me. My current wife and I almost split recently, it got so close that we told our daughter about it and started making financial plans. I eventually won my way back into her heart by changing literally everything about me that she was "done with", but it took literally three months of her kind of hating me. Every day was so goddamn painful, every conversation felt like someone had their fingers dug into my heart and were twisting them, when she told me she "loved me, but wasn't in love with me anymore", I waited till she went to sleep that night and I put my 38 against my head and thought about the many ways my daughter's and wife's life would be better without me. Only reason I didn't do it was that I read that disabled veterans had to hold the same disability rating for 14 or more years in order for the widow and child to receive the VA death gratuity when a vet commits suicide, figured if they don't get anything out of my death then why do it ya know? I haven't felt whole until she recently gave me that gorgeous, real smile that she used to, the one from the beginning when things were perfect, hard but perfect, just two days ago, and told me that she'll always be in love with me and that we'll be together forever. Will we be? Fuck man I don't know, but I didn't feel that life had a point before she said that. I'm fucking weak without her ya know? Like, it's honestly pathetic I guess, she and my daughter are my world, and I can't see a point to waking up without them. I legit envy people who can just move on and not feel like that ya know?
 
S

Sidney Prescott

Unconfirmed Member
I legit cannot fathom this. Not coming at you, just saying I envy your bravery in a sense. I'm on my second marriage, we've been married ten and a half years and my first wife and I fell apart at three years. I am 33 and three quarters years old, and I've been married a total of 13 and a half years, and I was in a long term relationship before that for a year. Ya know that song Addicted to Love? Yeah, it's about me lol. I can't live without someone to wrap myself in, and the heart break when it ends is just too fucking much for me. My current wife and I almost split recently, it got so close that we told our daughter about it and started making financial plans. I eventually won my way back into her heart by changing literally everything about me that she was "done with", but it took literally three months of her kind of hating me. Every day was so goddamn painful, every conversation felt like someone had their fingers dug into my heart and were twisting them, when she told me she "loved me, but wasn't in love with me anymore", I waited till she went to sleep that night and I put my 38 against my head and thought about the many ways my daughter's and wife's life would be better without me. Only reason I didn't do it was that I read that disabled veterans had to hold the same disability rating for 14 or more years in order for the widow and child to receive the VA death gratuity when a vet commits suicide, figured if they don't get anything out of my death then why do it ya know? I haven't felt whole until she recently gave me that gorgeous, real smile that she used to, the one from the beginning when things were perfect, hard but perfect, just two days ago, and told me that she'll always be in love with me and that we'll be together forever. Will we be? Fuck man I don't know, but I didn't feel that life had a point before she said that. I'm fucking weak without her ya know? Like, it's honestly pathetic I guess, she and my daughter are my world, and I can't see a point to waking up without them. I legit envy people who can just move on and not feel like that ya know?
It probably depends on your experiences, I guess. I can see why you'd want to be on your own after a bad marriage/break-up.

I can't imagine wanting to be on my own either at this juncture. I'm sort of fine with being single at the moment, but I really want to change that sooner rather than later.
 
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