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WHAT's people's experience with OKCupid?

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So, Tinder isn't updating my school/work info. It says to update my Facebook profile and I did. But it gives me no way to indicate where I go to school or work. I probably look like a jobless, uneducated bum :P

To be honest, that part of your profile means literally nothing on Tinder. I use it exclusively for identifying probably spam accounts--for some reason Mohawk University (Mohawk College is a real place, but I imagine it's not densely populated with super models) and working at the Krusty Krab pop up a lot, and are always women with either potato cam pics or clearly professionally show images where their boobs and asses are clearly on display. Actually, a majority of the girls I see that are clearly spam accounts tend to claim they go to art and design colleges, or are interns for FB or Google. Not even trying.
 
Okcupid was pretty awesome when it was totally free. Even after they added some pay features it was pretty good, but last time I logged in it looked like they went bonkers with pay features. Not saying you can't meet anyone with out spending any money, and I'm actually not against spending some money if I want to take it serious, but they've made it so gimmicky. If I'm gonna spend money on online dating, I'd probably go with Match.com

I've casually used Tinder for a couple months (while pooping), met a couple girls (one was actually a reconnect from 10+ years ago), neither lasted too long. I'm at kind of a disadvantage on Tinder, I'm pretty average looking so I don't get a ton matches. A lot don't respond or it doesn't lead to meeting up. On a place like OkC or Match, I have a better chance if they take the time to read my profile. I also rarely snap pictures of me doing shit so my lame pictures probably don't help.
 
If you're talking about tinder, that happened a lot with me initially. I've been using it for about six months and I haven't had a bot in the last two months or so.
I'm 4 for 4 now!

To be honest, that part of your profile means literally nothing on Tinder. I use it exclusively for identifying probably spam accounts--for some reason Mohawk University (Mohawk College is a real place, but I imagine it's not densely populated with super models) and working at the Krusty Krab pop up a lot, and are always women with either potato cam pics or clearly professionally show images where their boobs and asses are clearly on display. Actually, a majority of the girls I see that are clearly spam accounts tend to claim they go to art and design colleges, or are interns for FB or Google. Not even trying.
Well, I look at it. I mean, can people really not be bothered to look down at the text right below the image they are looking at?
 
I think okcupid works really well in big cities like NYC, Boston, etc. There's always new people on, and you dozens of options at any given time which never seem to run out as new people join (and I'm assuming this is only increasing as online dating isn't nearly as stigmatized as it use to be only 2-3 years ago)

I can at least confirm the contrast; online dating's usefulness severely crippled in small cities/towns, especially ones in more rural parts of tge country. Its very possible to run out of matches.
 
Having used OkCupid around Boston, I'd say the problem is way too many people. Any semi-interesting woman is going to have to wade through a deluge of responses, making it harder for a guy to break through. I ended up sending a crazy amount of messages that only amounted to a few uninteresting dates. I learned from the few months I was on it, but overall it was a waste of time.
 
I tried Okcupid for like a year on and off, It just didn't work for me. I had to push the range out to like 100 miles to find anyone I was interested in and my compatibility percentages were never really that great.
 
I have tried OKC and Tinder for like 2 weeks now. Absolutely zero matches. Well, the only matches I got were fake accounts trying to get me to pay for their cam shows. I've been pretty relaxed on the people I selected. Hell, for a little bit, I selected literally everybody that came up just to see what would happen. Still nothing. Two weeks seems like not a long time, but I don't really like this set up. I'm tired of reading profiles and writing real messages that just get ignored. I can see why people say this stuff is brutal to one's self-esteem. It's basically an endless gauntlet of rejection.
 
Went on a few crap dates and quit. At the behest of one of my best friends (female) she spruced up my profile and went on a date with a girl I've been with now for about 2 years. It's been rocky at times but I love the hell out of here. I also have a friend who's been married for 3 years now to a dude she met on there so some good stuff can happen.
 
I used OKCupid for a bit. I went on a bunch of first coffee dates with beautiful women who seemed like they had their shit together and then I ended up in a relationship for a year with an abusive alcoholic. That was my bad, though.
 
I've only tried it and POF so far, got two dates out of OKC and only been on POF for less than a month and have had one sustained convo there. PoF's got like no filtering at all, at least OKC gave me girls who didn't look like total mismatches on my match list.

Maybe i should try tinder, but i too am a victim of average looks (and would have to wait until i'm in a good place acne-wise to take a profile pic). I've heard the shotgun setup is like the only way to get ahead on tinder, but it's more likely for a girl to match you first there.
 
I have tried OKC and Tinder for like 2 weeks now. Absolutely zero matches. Well, the only matches I got were fake accounts trying to get me to pay for their cam shows. I've been pretty relaxed on the people I selected. Hell, for a little bit, I selected literally everybody that came up just to see what would happen. Still nothing. Two weeks seems like not a long time, but I don't really like this set up. I'm tired of reading profiles and writing real messages that just get ignored. I can see why people say this stuff is brutal to one's self-esteem. It's basically an endless gauntlet of rejection.

Online dating is poop except for the outliers for whom it works.

Real life dating is poop too but at least you can express yourself freely and react in real time to the signals of the other person.

I'm pretty sure dating in general is a scam I just need my panama papers to proof it
 

I hate that homosexuality is a sin question, because I was under the impression that as written in the bible, it is a sin. But I put an explanation that I don't really care and am not religious.

Also the "earth is bigger than the sun" question made me laugh.
 
Online dating is poop except for the outliers for whom it works.

Real life dating is poop too but at least you can express yourself freely and react in real time to the signals of the other person.

I'm pretty sure dating in general is a scam I just need my panama papers to proof it

See, the thing is at least real life dating can let you meet new people. Let's say I meet a girl and I like her but she doesn't like me. That's okay. If I think she's a cool person, then hey at least I have a new friend, right? That doesn't seem to exist on OKC or Tinder, from what I've tried.
 
See, the thing is at least real life dating can let you meet new people. Let's say I meet a girl and I like her but she doesn't like me. That's okay. If I think she's a cool person, then hey at least I have a new friend, right? That doesn't seem to exist on OKC or Tinder, from what I've tried.

That's a good point actually and may be a nice idea for app makers.
 
I am using OkCupid at the moment. I took a break from Plenty of Fish.

I haven't really met anyone. What's worse is that to see who liked you, you have to sub, but I will say this: it's better than Match.com.

Match.com wants money for everything. On OkCupid I haven't really talked to too many people. I did text two people and one I know now, but it isn't really going too well.

I have met a few women who are into computers, gaming, and even 3D Art. We just don't get along or we don't have a spark at all.

I'm actually just trying to get to know someone on there. The app is blocked and so is the site at my work, so I have to check it when I get home or if I get a good connection with my phone.

It is kinda hard because if anyone really wants to talk to you, they'd message you. I can check who visited my profile. I guess it's one of the better dating services. It's like Plenty of Fish in a way.

I went on a date with someone I met on POF and it kinda sucked. She kept talking about how she was going to move when her brother moved, that she was too old for her age, and she even said we didn't have that spark. It kinda sucked and it just keeps moving I guess.

Edit: I also want to relax and have a beer with someone. I can't be hiding the fact or wanting someone else to hide the fact that an ice cold beer tastes good after a day's worth of work.
 
I have tried OKC and Tinder for like 2 weeks now. Absolutely zero matches. Well, the only matches I got were fake accounts trying to get me to pay for their cam shows. I've been pretty relaxed on the people I selected. Hell, for a little bit, I selected literally everybody that came up just to see what would happen. Still nothing. Two weeks seems like not a long time, but I don't really like this set up. I'm tired of reading profiles and writing real messages that just get ignored. I can see why people say this stuff is brutal to one's self-esteem. It's basically an endless gauntlet of rejection.

Dude don't let these dating apps affect your self-esteem. I have a friend that looks like the Mexican Ryan Gosling, yet he didn't have the hottest online streak, but he does perfectly fine irl.

I had a few dates outta okc and tinder. Sometimes a few happened in rapid sessions, but most of the time it was cold with no responses for weeks. I had a female coworker who recently signed up for a dating site and she said in no time, she got bombarded with messages. It could be they either haven't gotten to your messages or sadly simply delete a lot of messages without checking it.
 
What kinds of messages are you guys sending out not to get a response? It's the same prepared one right?

Nope. I write unique stuff to everybody. I only wrote messages to those I thought were interesting based on their profile. My messages basically introduced myself and what I'm looking for and what I found interesting about them based on their profile. I even say that if you're just looking to make friends, then that's cool. I always like making new friends too.
 
Nope. I write unique stuff to everybody. I only wrote messages to those I thought were interesting based on their profile. My messages basically introduced myself and what I'm looking for and what I found interesting about them based on their profile. I even say that if you're just looking to make friends, then that's cool. I always like making new friends too.


Ha! I was actually going to respond to one of your posts. Two weeks is not enough time to gauge how well you will do on Okcupid.

From what you describe the way you message is too damn long, it's like you are sending a resume to these women it's not that serious. I never had a hard time getting a date on there and I am 5'6".

I met my wife on there and I sent her a one sentence message asking about something she likes.
 
Ha! I was actually going to respond to one of your posts. Two weeks is not enough time to gauge how well you will do on Okcupid.

From what you describe the way you message is too damn long, it's like you are sending a resume to these women it's not that serious. I never had a hard time getting a date on there and I am 5'6".

I met my wife on there and I sent her a one sentence message asking about something she likes.

I don't think they're that long. They're like 4 sentences at most.
 
All in all, I had two go-arounds on OKCupid. During law school, I ended up meeting the girl who became my now ex-wife, and I had an easy enough time dating undergrads. For this second iteration, likely because I live in a big city, I've had something like 50+ first dates over the span of almost two years.

I'm ballparking, though I distinctly remember a gauntlet of "seven dates in seven days" though. This resulted in three actual girlfriends, and the current one's nearing the three-month mark.

OKC's amazing, since you get to meet people you would never encounter in the wild.
 
mostly getting on there wasted once a week a few years ago and being a fucking weirdo.

really online dating is inherently creepy. or just dating. socializing.
 
Maybe I just haven't taken it as seriously as I should, but I haven't gotten past matching and chatting.

Notably, I had a good conversation with someone once on OKC, and the moment I brought up meeting for coffee, she ghosted on me. Oh well.

Tinder's even worse - I matched up with one person, who I couldn't hold a conversation with, and the rest of my matches were spam bots. I eventually figured out how to avoid spam bots, but that's pretty much it for me.

I chalked it up to a weak profile, but maybe I'm just that terrible that not even anyone online would want to talk to me.
 
My experience was pretty good overall. I got out what I put in. I came at it with no assumptions and didn't feel entitled to anything. With that mindset it was a good experience.
 
Maybe I just haven't taken it as seriously as I should, but I haven't gotten past matching and chatting.

Notably, I had a good conversation with someone once on OKC, and the moment I brought up meeting for coffee, she ghosted on me. Oh well.

Tinder's even worse - I matched up with one person, who I couldn't hold a conversation with, and the rest of my matches were spam bots. I eventually figured out how to avoid spam bots, but that's pretty much it for me.

I chalked it up to a weak profile, but maybe I'm just that terrible that not even anyone online would want to talk to me.

I get replies a lot, the problem is actually turning those into meetings.
 
I get replies a lot, the problem is actually turning those into meetings.

What's the issue there? Switch to texting, then propose something.

I don't know if the ghosting problem is real or overblown; I just know that I've never experienced it. In fact, a few times, I was the one who never attempted to pursue meeting in person because the conversation was already fading. Otherwise, it was a 100% success rate on asking someone for a drink and having her appear. Obviously, it happens, otherwise people wouldn't keep mentioning it. I just wish I had better advice than "switch to text, then directly ask them out."

Anyway, much (if not all) of this is detailed in the various dating threads, like here and here.
 
I went on two dates with two different women yesterday. First girl was eh, alright looking. She kissed me. Second girl was attractive. She kissed me a couple times. Said she normally doesn't kiss on first dates. Gonna see her again next week.

Another girl last Monday we texted, spontaneously went to see a movie that night, and this girl was so smittened by my looks and physique that even i was blushing when we hung out in the parking.

I just haven't had any luck really with okc. I mainly use pof and tinder.
 
I made a profile just for shits and giggles about a month ago. Had it up for five minutes, got a bunch of messages. One of them was from a 17 year old high schooler who's picture featured him with a fedora.

I deleted my profile immediately.
 
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