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[MikeDip]

I know this can't just a weird quirk. Is the public majority really fine with all these drinks that are so damn liquidy? Every time I grab a coke or a whatever right before it touches my lips I think to myself "This is gonna be amazing and thick" but then it never is. I believe this happens to me because of my love of maple syrup and the expectations that come with it. I picture coke in my mind and I know there is flavour syrup in there, so I guess my brain assumes it will be thick. But it never is.

To help this terrible feeling, I either get the drinks slushy frozen first (Which sucks as I don't like cold drinks) or gulp it hard so it hits the back of my throat and gives the illusion of what I am looking for.

What's stopping coke or pepsi from making thicker versions of their drinks? And if there are thicker drinks please tell me! And no, drinking something like maple syrup is not the answer, I'd balloon to 500 pounds in a month. A nice bottle of standard flavour diet coke with the consistence of honey is what I want.

 

[Melon Husk]

 

[Poodlestrike]

For once, OP, it really is just you.

 

[Ray Wonder]

What the fuck? I don't know what to say about this. You drink maple syrup?

 

[Impeccable]

You can buy thickeners for medical purposes. My daughter uses them because she aspirates on liquids.

 

[GrizzNKev]

I can give you something thick

 

[DaiHard]

How do you feel about milkshakes? The ones from McD are so thick I can't drink it until it melts a little.

 

[Ray Wonder]

You can buy thickeners for medical purposes. My daughter uses them because she aspirates on liquids.

Looks like no matter the problem. Someone on gaf has you covered.

 

[MikeDip]

What the fuck? I don't know what to say about this. You drink maple syrup?

No I don't (the 10ish bottles in my fridge are not for drinking, I swear). But I wish my drinks had the thickness of it.

You can buy thickeners for medical purposes. My daughter uses them because she aspirates on liquids.

I forgot to mention this but my grandmother had some of this before. I tried it in a coke, it was a disaster. Maybe the tech has improved or I had a bad brand though. Should look into this some more.

 

[moojito]

You could buy the concentrate stuff they put in the soft drink dispensers in fast food places, and... just chug it straight from the bottle?

 

[Red Liquorice]

Gross. I'm the opposite, things like fizzy drinks are often too thick to me, you can feel the sugary syrup coating your mouth, it's not thirst quenching at all.

 

[GrizzNKev]

I had a non-water drink one time in the last, I'd say, like, eight months. You could not survive my life.

 

[Zoned]

OT is fucked with food opinions like these.

First it was putting rice in a burrito and now someone drinking maple syrup and shit and then expecting coke to be thick?

Guess what OP, next time order a banana smoothie and you'll get thick as fuck drink

I can give you something thick

lmao

 

[jerd]

.

 

[MikeDip]

Gross. I'm the opposite, things like fizzy drinks are often too thick to me, you can feel the sugary syrup coating your mouth, it's not thirst quenching at all.

Interesting! For me I don't feel my thirst quenched unless it hits the back of my throat hard. I can sip water forever but I need to throw in a gulp or two or else I feel terrible and unrefreshed.

 

[LyleLanley]

A thick coke sounds absolutely disgusting.

Edit:

I am now seeing the humor in this post.

 

[True Savior]

What a strange desire.

 

[Symphonia]

There's a café/restaurant near me called Poppins that do a really thick coke.

It's amazing.

 

[The_Hitcher89]

Swallow an ice cube

 

[Siegcram]

I'd like to offer some genuine advice, but my brain keeps going "lol wat".

 

[MikeDip]

I had a non-water drink one time in the last, I'd say, like, eight months. You could not survive my life.

I can drink water just fine. I like water! But I wish it was thick. I need to gulp it to make it hit the back of my throat to feel refreshed.

There's a café/restaurant near me called Poppins that do a really thick coke.

It's amazing.

That sounds wonderful, what kind of thickness? Is it the milkshake/chilled coke kind where you can tell it's slushy or is it actually syrupy?

 

[Graphics Horse]

. I need to gulp it to make it hit the back of my throat to feel refreshed.

Why don't you just do that then?

 

[Skunkers]

Who's going to make with the Supertroopers chugging maple syrup gif? Jeez, you're slipping, GAF.

 

[Ban Puncher]

Just swallow your own phlegm repeatedly in a cycle. You'll never have to 'drink thin' again.

When you get a cold you can ride that green, lumpy train to satisfaction-ville.

 

[Horseticuffs]

I use a lot of medical thickeners at work. If memory serves they don't even have any noticeable caloric effect. You can make your shit as thick as suits you. For dysphagia patients we usually set it up for either nectar, honey, or pudding thickness.

Honestly the stuff we use is a gel that gives everything the slight appearance of tapioca. I haven't tried it and we don't get many complaints but usually when you've reached the point of needing this stuff you don't give many fucks anyways.

 

[MikeDip]

Why don't you just do that then?

Well I do, but it's like patchwork. I'd rather have the jacket without the elbow pads.

Sipping a nice thick drink would be much nicer than this stupid gulp thing I do.

 

[scabro]

im drowning in the possible innuendo of this thread

 

[Siegcram]

Just swallow your own phlegm repeatedly. You'll never have to 'drink thin' again.

When you get a cold you can ride that green, lumpy train to satisfaction-ville.

Didn't we have a thread on that as well recently?

 

[Symphonia]

That sounds wonderful, what kind of thickness? Is it the milkshake/chilled coke kind where you can tell it's slushy or is it actually syrupy?

I'd say it sits comfortably in the middle between slushy and syrupy. It's definitely a lot thicker than what McDonalds and KFC do around here. It goes nicely with the cheeseburgers Poppins do.

 

[shiherlis21]

You could just put gelatine in your drinks. If that's not enough, put it in the maple syrup

 

[MikeDip]

Who's going to make with the Supertroopers chugging maple syrup gif? Jeez, you're slipping, GAF.

I specifically put the line in about NOT drinking maple syrup in top post because my other thread about reviewing maple syrup had that picture as the first reply.

 

[Ban Puncher]

Didn't we have a thread on that as well recently?

Snot to my memory.

 

[GrizzNKev]

Well I do, but it's like patchwork. I'd rather have the jacket without the elbow pads.

Sipping a nice thick drink would be much nicer than this stupid gulp thing I do.

Make pancake or waffle mix and drink it instead of cooking it.

 

[Android18a]

I hate how syrupy regular Coke is. The only thick drink I like is a milkshake.

The idea of thicker coke and water is strange to me.

 

[Zaraki_Kenpachi]

This sounds absolutely disgusting.

 

[Seraphis Cain]

I hate how syrupy regular Coke is. The only thick drink I like is a milkshake.

The idea of thicker coke and water is strange to me.

And everyone else, I imagine. "Refreshing" things are always thin, like water, Gatorade, etc.

 

[GrizzNKev]

A thick coke sounds absolutely disgusting.

Edit:

I am now seeing the humor in this post.

Not only that, but he enjoys a thick coke hitting the back of his throat. I hope he is not in denial.

 

[barik]

You could order a lot of soup and milkshakes?

 

[TommyTosser]

I think this for cups of Tea, cause milk...and stuff?

Probably why i don't like the stuff.

 

[MikeDip]

I think this for cups of Tea, cause milk...and stuff?

Probably why i don't like the stuff.

A thick coffee sounds wonderful! I just finished my morning coffee, it was not wonderful at all.

 

[Graphics Horse]

Sipping a nice thick drink would be much nicer than this stupid gulp thing I do.

Your kidneys might disagree but ok

 

[Bulbo Urethral Baggins]

You need to check out the Hormel line of thick drinks, you werido. Even have thick water.

 

[MikeDip]

You need to check out the Hormel line of thick drinks, you werido. Even have thick water.

Sweet Jesus, that's amazing. Researching now, hope it exists here in Canada.

Thanks!

 

[Dice]

I'm so confused. Why would you only sip a drink as your "normal" drinking? I guess to me there are two kinds of drinking; hydration drinking and flavor enjoyment drinking. The latter of which is like scotch, cocoa, beer, etc. Almost everything else I gulp because that's what liquid is for and the flavor is just a bonus.

Anyway, if you like drinking thick stuff, make cocoa wheats with too much milk. I accidentally did that once when carelessly eyeballing it instead of using real measurement and hooo boy it was like a hot milkshake or something. Kind of annoying though because it stays ridiculously hot for so long and you have to keep stirring it to keep it from getting a skin on the top.

 

[Always-honest]

Mix some real fruit into the drink. Not just the juice.

 

[RangerX]

Yes it is just you. Not wanting liquidy drinks is weird enough but the fact you don't like cold drinks has cemented my view of you OP. The horror.

 

[Wiktor]

Just get some milk and throw it into blender with lots and lots of fruits.

 

[MikeDip]

Just get some milk and throw it into blender with lots and lots of fruits.

This is good. Tastes great, thick, perfect. But the problem is this tastes like milk and fruit. It's like recommending pizza to someone who wanted a steak. Good but different.

I want a coke, exactly the way coke tastes. But thick.
(Coke just an example, this can apply to whatever drink I am having at the time)

 

[jett]

.

 

[Wiktor]

This is good. Tastes great, thick, perfect. But the problem is this tastes like milk and fruit. It's like recommending pizza to someone who wanted a steak. Good but different.

I want a coke, exactly the way coke tastes. But thick.
(Coke just an example, this can apply to whatever drink I am having at the time)

Well..I have no idea how it will taste, but you could boil the coke down to desired constitncy and use one of those little machines that put CO2 into the drinks.