Support NeoGAF

[Torquill]

Here's a question. Why do so many male actors grow unsightly beards in between movie roles and wear them to talk shows?

So that they are prepared for whatever type of facial hair the next role may require? Just cut off what you don't need?

 

[Kyoufu]

Beards make me (persian) look like a terrorist.

 

[Lateraleye]

Beards are to scratchy! So I found a good medium, chops!
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3447/3268112951_4c92c451a5.jpg

HAY GUYZ I FOUND OUT WHO JACK THE RIPPER IS

I can't grow a 100% beard. Facial hair is everywhere except right beside my lips and most of my cheeks so if it was all the way out I'd look like a 70's cop... which might not actually be a bad thing. There's no middle ground either because if I shave it all off I look like I'm in high school and keeping it makes me look like a hipster. Boohoo. My dream is to one day, through surgery, tonics, or pasties, wear a "crazy Jack" from the last season of Lost.

 

[JKBii]

Pros
______________

Chuck Norris
Socrates
Plato
Confucius
Jesus
Joaquin Phoenix
ZZ Top

Cons
______________

Osama Bin Laden
Devil
Saruman

How is Saruman a con but Gandalf is not a pro?

 

[shintoki]

Because you look like shit with them

 

[nyprimus2]

http://soundboard.com/sb/knocked_up_beard_joke.aspx

 

[Danielsan]

HAY GUYZ I FOUND OUT WHO JACK THE RIPPER IS

I can't grow a 100% beard. Facial hair is everywhere except right beside my lips and most of my cheeks so if it was all the way out I'd look like a 70's cop... which might not actually be a bad thing. There's no middle ground either because if I shave it all off I look like I'm in high school and keeping it makes me look like a hipster. Boohoo. My dream is to one day, through surgery, tonics, or pasties, wear a "crazy Jack" from the last season of Lost.

Ooh yes, I want that too.

Basically right now my chin and upper lip have semi-reasonable hair growth, the rest leaves a lot to be desired though.There is some hair on my cheeks but it just isn't thick enough. Still there has been a lot of progression in the last year or so. Maybe I should just let it grow out for a while and see what happens. Then again, I don't want to walk around with a ridiculous looking uneven patchy "beard".

 

[zaxor0]

Beards are to scratchy! So I found a good medium, chops!

I have chops too! Though yours look a bit nicer than mine. I'd grow a full beard if I were able. But I have the exact facial hair growth as Joe Dirt: Mustache, Chops, and Goatee which never connect.

 

[Bonfires Down]

Thread needs more pics.

 

[tawal]

I can't grow a 100% beard. Facial hair is everywhere except right beside my lips and most of my cheeks so if it was all the way out I'd look like a 70's cop... which might not actually be a bad thing. There's no middle ground either because if I shave it all off I look like I'm in high school and keeping it makes me look like a hipster.\

this is totally my problem too. see:

~3 weeks of growth. HHHHH!!! this was a few months ago, and I've started re-growing it and it's a little thicker now but still far from satisfactory. it's frustrating because all I want in life is a majestic beard. I am 21 and so I still have a little hope that maybe it'll finally happen. my father can grow an OK beard. I hate him.

I do, however, like to comb my unbeard (at night). especially with knives.

 

[xBerserker]

I have chops too! Though yours look a bit nicer than mine. I'd grow a full beard if I were able. But I have the exact facial hair growth as Joe Dirt: Mustache, Chops, and Goatee which never connect.

Everything connects for me if I let it, but I noticed my right side grows just slightly longer.

 

[Karakand]

Also, when you have a full beard and you shower, do you wash it with shampoo/conditioner as if it were head hair? Or regular body gel/soap is enough?

Doesn't really matter since I can't grow a proper beard and I'm 26, but...

After rubbing the shampoo in my head hair I use the remnants on my beard. I keep mine very short though so I can get away with that.

As for the decline in beard respect, I would pin it on Rome.

 

[kozmo7]

What about soul patches? I have a pretty good sized one.

 

[reggieandTFE]

A large part of the anti-beard, anti-facial hair rhetoric comes out of stodgy corporate culture. If you go back in history, you'll notice most leftist revolutionaries generally had ass-kicking beards (Marx, young Stalin, Che Guevara, etc.) Unfortunately, this custom was picked up by the dirty, do-nothing hippie movement.

note: While grabbing these pictures I was reminded that Karl Marx wrote columns for the New York Times in the 1850s. I wonder why Republicans don't bring that up more when impeaching the NYT as a commie rag.

 

[Ranger X]

I think that are beard is perfectly fine.
Right now it's not ala mode so it doesn't help the beard case. I think we might have some reluctance to hair. The more time goes on, the less hair we need to have. My son will probably be perceived as dirty and lazy if he still have pubic hair or under his arms. Even maybe ON his arms who knows? lol

Must be some stupid unconscious effect of our ego as human specie. Probably that we associate hair with "animals" and we probably like to think we are so evolved (while we are nothing).

.

 

[JavyOO7]

I would like to grow a beard. Maybe this thread will give me some inspiration. =p

 

[subzero9285]

Real men...etc.

 

[blame space]

My beard is badass. The secret is straddling the line between a homeless man and a member of Against Me! (it's a fine line)

 

[Mar]

Because you look like shit with them

You can't grow one can you.

 

[DrBo42]

The world will look up and shout "Shave it!" And I'll whisper, "No."

 

[MercuryLS]

Some of us can't grow beards, so we make fun of those who do.

Bingo, I secretly would love to grow a nice beard

 

[braimuge]

The world will look up and shout "Shave it!" And I'll whisper, "No."

:lol

(Owl guy in brown suit)-what happened to the American Beard?

(comedian)- You're looking at it


@post above:

You secretly want that epicness huh

 

[CancerTeeth]

I am a fan of the master beardsman.

 

[thetechkid]

People who hate beards are wrong.

 

[Zeke]

bearded for life I can't imagine shaving mine off I would feel so naked without it. Tho I need a good clean up since mine is getting a little out of hand at the moment.

 

[notsol337]

This thread has inspired me to shave off my horrible patchy neckbeard.

I want a beard but am too meek and feeble.

 

[Crateman]

I've been sporting a beard on and off for about a year. It all comes down to how I feel about it at a given time.

Beard pros:
-I look 2-3 years older with beard.
-Some chicks like it.
-Manliness +2
-When bored you can play with it.
-Girls who dig it and caress it = damn good.

Beard cons:
-Maintenance.
-It can backfire in your personal appearance if you don't take constant care of it.
-Dealing with the neard

Shave pros:
-Some chicks like it.
-Girls say I look "cuter"
-The feeling of a just-clean-shaved face = epic.

Shave cons:
-You look like just everybody else.
-Maintenance.
-Motherfucking 2 day mustache shadow. Disgusting

 

[RevenantKioku]

If I could, without great scarring, make it so I never grew facial hair again I would be very happy.
I grew a mustache for Movember and it was terrifying.
(Okay, I didn't really "grow a mustache" as much as not shave it for 4 weeks. It was horrific for it was barely anything at all.)

 

[Eteric Rice]

I tried growing a beard once, and I can grow one, but I hate sleeping with it. If I move my face, the hair pulls.

Fuck that.

Beards are awesome, though.

 

[milkyjay20]

That's wtf is wrong with society today. Women should be women, and enjoy that shit. Hairy chest and beard = manliness. I thank God everyday for my awesome beard and chest hair.

Real women prefer that rough shit, don't be a bitch, stop shaving or at least just keep some of it. The women who don't aren't women yet, and don't deserve you. It's like all of a sudden men were to turn around and hate big breasts, that's bullshit.

I hate people who just leave a moustache and think they're men. Full beard+moustache is the way to go. or Just beard. Bottom line, beard decides your manliness.

It's fucking epic to just grab the beard when in deep pondering. Something only a true man can accomplish.

:lol :lol

me, i'm all about the five o'clock shadow. would anybody argue against the manliness of indiana jones?

 

[Timedog]

Holy fuck, did somebody in this thread really just say "beard decides your manliness"????

BEARD DECIDES YOUR MANLINESS????

So so awesome.

 

[RevenantKioku]

Holy fuck, did somebody in this thread really just say "beard decides your manliness"????

BEARD DECIDES YOUR MANLINESS????

So so awesome.

Fuck, I'm a lesbian trapped in a hairless man's body.

 

[Snowman Prophet of Doom]

I've read countless times here on GAF that a guy is shaving his chest/can't grow facial hair because of their GFs.

Sad.

I shave my chest, groin, and balls because I like to. I am a true man.

 

[super metroid]

ot in the ot: how do I make my hair look like stalin's?

 

[Flynn]

It's about, in part, conformity.

Read about Joseph Palmer

In 1830, at the age of forty-two, a quiet unobtrusive, God-fearing man named Joseph Palmer moved to Fitchburg, Massachusetts. Normally, such an event would have caused no great stir in the community, the newcomer would have settled down and been accepted, and life would have gone on as before. Only one thing prevented matters working out that way—Joseph Palmer wore a beard. And in 1830 beards were not worn in Fitchburg. Had he been merely passing through or stopping off for a few days, he would undoubtedly have been merely an object of curiosity and perhaps some thoughtless finger-pointing. But he had come to stay, to settle among these people, to become one of them; and this was intolerable. The unthinkable had happened—Fitchburg was harbouring a non-conformist.

Derision changed to outrage and outrage to anger. Palmer’s windows were repeatedly broken, and somehow the culprits were never found. Women crossed the street to avoid him, and their sons threw stones at him. Even the Reverend George Trask admonished him; and eventually, all else failing, the Church refused him communion.

Shortly afterward, Palmer was set upon in the street by four men, who threw him down, injuring his back, and attempted to shave him. Palmer managed to drive off the assailants with his pocket knife and was thereupon arrested, beard and all, for unprovoked assault. When he refused to pay the fine, he was imprisoned for a year in Worcester.

But this was not the end of his story. In prison he nourished his beard and wrote letters, which he managed, with the help of his son, to smuggle out. The letters protested that he had really been imprisoned not for assault, but for wearing a beard. They were published in various newspapers, the case was widely discussed, public opinion shifted to his side, and Joseph Palmer and his beard became a cause célèbre. After a time, he became such an embarrassment to the local constabulary that they suggested he forget the whole thing and go home. He refused as a matter of principle, saying that if they wanted him out, they’d have to carry him out. And that is what they finally had to do.

Before he died in 1875, Joseph Palmer had the satisfaction of seeing practically the entire male population bearded, including the local clergy.

via Wondermark

 

[Khalifa Jayy]

ot in the ot: how do I make my hair look like stalin's?

Seriously, that's kinda the look I want to go for. Currently in the process of letting my hair grow out, but I wanna do something similar to that but a bit modernized...

 

[Karakand]

I hate that whenever I've read job interview tips (or receive them from friends), "shave your beard off," always makes an appearance. They say it's because you give off the impression that you're concealing something. Fuck you I'm concealing something, mother fuckers, it's my weak mother fucking chin. You gonna hire someone with a weak mother fucking chin? Catch-22.

 

[freddy]

Some people that don't have the necessary genetic make-up can't grow facial hair. A lot of them get upset by this and the old if-I-can't-have-it-it's-not-worth-having mentality takes over.

The majority though take their lack of manhood in good grace.

 

[TheExodu5]

I'm 21 and I only have a tiny bit of facial hair on my chin, and a tiny bit starting on my cheeks. Can't grow that shit yet. Doesn't help that I look like I'm 12.

That's why I wear a fake mustache and an eye patch.

edit: funny thing is I kind of look like L...I even get into monkey like positions when at my PC. =\

 

[sbarbati]

When my g/f of three years broke up with me over the summer I took it upon myself to grow out the manliest beard I could think of... Sort of a fuck you to all women who despise them (she never let me grow out a mustache in order to complete the beard)... Then after it got nice and thick I trimmed it down, and I think it looks pretty good to be honest. I keep it well maintained, and the only drawbacks are constantly having to maintain the neard and getting used to sleeping on it lol.

I love my beard... it's like a constant reminder to everyone around me that I'm manly...

 

[RevenantKioku]

Some people that don't have the necessary genetic make-up can't grow facial hair. A lot of them get upset by this and the old if-I-can't-have-it-it's-not-worth-having mentality takes over.

The majority though take their lack of manhood in good grace.

I mostly find it odd that people take pride in such things and find a beard a measure of anything.

 

[freddy]

I mostly find it odd that people take pride in such things and find a beard a measure of anything.

I'm the same but I find it funny also that people take this line of thought seriously so I like to stir the pot a bit.

I can grow a fine looking beard but the fact that its becomes ginger after a certain length and my hair is blonde/dark blonde makes it look pretty silly.

 

[SnakeXs]

Some people that don't have the necessary genetic make-up can't grow facial hair. A lot of them get upset by this and the old if-I-can't-have-it-it's-not-worth-having mentality takes over.

The majority though take their lack of manhood in good grace.

While it may be true, fuck that. I'm goddamned jealous. I want one. >=[

 

[zoukka]

Like everything, it's a "wavelike motion". Beards will be "cool" again someday.

I hate this generic metrosexual age we live.

 

[PuppetSlave]

A motivation thats not mine but one that I have heard is that having a beard makes you seem like you are hiding something.

 

[Flynn]

A motivation thats not mine but one that I have heard is that having a beard makes you seem like you are hiding something.

Hiding your awesomeness.

 

[braimuge]

Hiding your awesomeness.

This. My beard makes my jaw line look so awesome. Even without it, my jawline is blessed. But the beard descends glory upon it. My beard is fucking awesome, it knows not do go below my lower chin/jaw. It has the markings of mannery.