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[davepoobond]

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those o faces are reserved for those weird lookin chicks forza posted

 

[miyuru]

I don't really make internet *friends*. No offence to anyone here on the boards. You're all my friends, but I'm not the type of person to actively seek out new friendships. We more know *of* each other through posting and reading each others posts, and replying, and so forth.

But, talking one-on-one? I don't really do MSN unless I actually know the person. There have been exceptions (i.e. the website I used to write for). But yeah...I dunno.

I'm not against people making friends over the internet. I don't mean to sound arrogant but, I don't really *need* to. I almost see it as pathetic in a sense, because I get the feeling that people who actively make friends over the internet don't have any friends in their immediate, physical social sphere. So it's like the internet acts as their social realm, because they can't support one in the physical world.

After meeting all those GAF'ers in real life at E3 (whom I've never actually talked to directly, but just recognize through GAF), the idea of internet friends is pretty cool though. I'd love to arrange a trip to E3 with some GAF'ers, but I don't know any well enough to go, and I don't think I'm going to be PM'ing GAF'ers saying we should chat together etc., unless we already sorta know each other.

But yeah, I still support anyone making e-friends. Go for it

 

[Steve Youngblood]

I think there are a myriad of factors that can contribute to this. The most sterotypical is of course the stereotype that nobody is who they claim to be. There is a lot of anonymity to the internet. People choose the name they go by. They can choose what pictures to display, whether it's a real picture of him/her, a pop culture avatar, or the most flattering pictures of themselves. While one can make a point that people can lie just as easily in real life, there are marked differences. Not that looks are everything, but if I'm meeting someone in real life, either party is free to judge the other's physical appearance without having to delve through descriptions and/or pictures that may or may not be accurate. Also, discussions happen in real time, without being able to ponder desirable responses. Online, one has much more oppurtunity to present themselves the same way that they would do so on a job application -- accentuate the positives and downplay the negatives.

But, for the sake of this argument, let's just pretend that we can always assume that people are exactly who they say the are on the internet. The fact remains that the internet has not reached a point of being a legitimate social avenue. It's still considered more a place to go for information, and as a time waster. When people ask you what you did last night, "I talked to a girl online" isn't really considered an entertaining story. Social outings are expected to consist of you interacting with people in the flesh. "People lie" and "the internet is nerdy" cliches aside, the virtual world is just not going to usurp good old fashioned real world interaction any time in the near future.

This is primarily due to the limitations of the internet. Although the internet can be used as a means to facilitate actually meeting in real life, prior to that happening, all you can do is converse. If I'm really enjoying a conversation I'm having with someone several hundred miles away, when it comes time for deciding what you can do together this evening, your options are talking or talking or um... talking. If they're close enough to meet, the question is how long does this need to go on before you can meet them and not have it feel like some shady blind date?

And then of course, there's the fact that the horror stories tend to be more memorable than the success stories. It doesn't matter how many "I met my fiance/spouse" online success stories there are out there, the "I went to meet this girl and she was ugly as sin/a psycho/any other undesirable traits" stories tend to stick with you longer, causing you to dismiss the former as exceptions to the rule.

 

[cvxfreak]

My luck with friends over the internet has been 100% good so far. Have met some really nice people and wouldn't mind meeting a few more, especially from here on GAF.

I might be jumping the gun by saying this but I guess judging from people's posts I can at the very least tell if I'm going to like a particular poster or not. I'd be willing to meet up with just about anyone on my GAF buddy list, for example.

 

[etiolate]

But, for the sake of this argument, let's just pretend that we can always assume that people are exactly who they say the are on the internet. The fact remains that the internet has not reached a point of being a legitimate social avenue. It's still considered more a place to go for information, and as a time waster. When people ask you what you did last night, "I talked to a girl online" isn't really considered an entertaining story. Social outings are expected to consist of you interacting with people in the flesh. "People lie" and "the internet is nerdy" cliches aside, the virtual world is just not going to usurp good old fashioned real world interaction any time in the near future.

Eh, the real world interaction seems to be a lot of people standing around on their cellphones ignoring the people in their near vicinity. When they do talk to people in the near vicinity, the discussions are meaningless and often annoying.

I'm not saying the internet should be the main focus of social interaction. I just don't understand the heirarchy.

 

[miyuru]

Eh, the real world interaction seems to be a lot of people standing around on their cellphones ignoring the people in their near vicinity. When they do talk to people in the near vicinity, the discussions are meaningless and often annoying.

I'm not saying the internet should be the main focus of social interaction. I just don't understand the heirarchy.

That's rather pessimistic. I agree with you...the stigma associated with the internet isn't really fair. But that's not an excuse to downplay realworld interactions.

 

[etiolate]

I consider it realistic rather than pessimistic.

For example, I see a certain married couple I know around town a lot. They greet me with a smile, a sort of nice facade. The conversations don't go past "Heey" really much at all, but they are always nice and happy. Recently I find out they've been seperated for a month, that they both have been sleepign around and swinging like mad. Reality was not at all like their real life appearance. There's just a lot of lies in all social itneraction. If I am going to have to put up with those lies then I want some real conversations, too. I don't want to talk about the weather. On the internet for some reason, I get more real conversations. In person, it's just meaningless stuff. How often do you really know how the other person is doing? You just don't and a lot of times I think people are afraid to know.

So I wonder, if people are afraid of the internet, because the level of verbal intamacy that is reached in e-conversation is more than they can handle. When you say "sup" online, you can't just follow it with a nod and a smoke.

 

[Takuan]

There is a stigma tied to internet people because it masks the weirdos, freaks and other such individuals normal folks would tend to avoid in real life. EVERYONE uses the internet, which can be construed as both good and bad.

Personally, I couldn't form any sort of close relationship with a person I only know from the internet. I could hang out and have fun with a handful of you, but that'd probably be it. Then again, it's not something I've ever tried, so maybe down the road my opinion will change.

 

[davepoobond]

the clientelle on the internet is no more dangerous than those you meet randomly or pass by in real life.

but the "hiding behind a mask" thing makes it difficult to believe someone for who they say they are right off the bat, even with pictures. Video is probably the only real way to know someone is who they say they are without physically meeting them.

 

[Rlan]

I used to think mst Nerds were like me: There would be a line that you wouldn't cross.

Then I went to my University's Game group one night, and they were quipping quotes from Penny Arcade, and yelling "Owned".

Then a few nights ago I realised one of my old friends hung out with a co-worker. When I chatted to them both for 5 minutes, I heard things like "omg hax" and "huh-eight" coming out of their mouths. I also know that one of these peoples passwords was once "1337".

THAT is why there is a stigma.

 

[miyuru]

THAT is why there is a stigma.

But there doesn't have to be, which is the point

(No worries, I understand what you're saying

 

[Steve Youngblood]

On the internet for some reason, I get more real conversations. In person, it's just meaningless stuff. How often do you really know how the other person is doing? You just don't and a lot of times I think people are afraid to know.

So I wonder, if people are afraid of the internet, because the level of verbal intamacy that is reached in e-conversation is more than they can handle. When you say "sup" online, you can't just follow it with a nod and a smoke.

Well, there are a few reasons why you can have more stimulating conversations with people online than you can in the real world. First of all, by being online in any of the various mediums, you're pretty much stating that you WANT to have a conversation. You don't log onto chat rooms, or publically list your instant messenger handles if you don't want people to bother you. People are less likely to start conversing with random people in real life because you don't really know whether or not they want to talk to you, or if they'll prove entertaining conversationalist. That's why cliche and uninteresting topics like the weather pop up. It's relatable and conversation could spring up out of it, but it's also easy to abandon it after "Yep, it sure is hot" if nothing sparks.

Also, online, people generally have some sort of 'in' to initiate a conversation. If it's a chat room, there's generally some main topic that the chat room is about, or they're messaging you/you're messaging them because one of the people involved stumbled upon the other's profile. So, we now have the fact that you are logged on with the expectation that you want to converse, and there are plenty of possible conversation-starters.

There's also the fact that anonymity means that we can be more open. As long as no personal information is handed out, you don't really have to worry about your image, or being offensive, or saying something that someone else is going to hear. Unless your relationship progresses to the next level (friendship or dating depending on what you're looking for), you're just two random strangers that can converse about whatever makes your heart content. It's up to you whether or not this person will enter into your 'real' life, so people are generally willing to be a bit more open.

 

[miyuru]

Also, I understand what you're saying etiolate, and it IS true in countless instances.

But, when I'm talking with *friends*, it's never like how you described. With acquaintances and so forth, for sure.