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[injurai]

..this and I hate the term "cuss words" it's swearing.

I'll cuss you out boy.

 

[RumblingRosco]

"Frick" and "shoot." Though I usually just choose a different word all together. I also avoid using "gay" or "retarded" when not actually talking about someone that is gay or something that is actually slowed. Clearly, they aren't swearing/cussing/whatever, but they're in bad taste at the very least.

 

[Kinitari]

I get old time up in this business.

Floozy, dunce, harlot etc

It's fun

 

[KO Traveling Hobo]

I either swear like a sailor or keep my language completely clean. No faux swears that I can think of.

 

[Double D]

My local news channel's newest 'weather technology' thing is called Klystron 9. I've been using this instead of 'son of a bitch' or 'fuck!'. Like if I'm doing handywork around the house and I'm frustrated as hell, shouting 'Klystron 9' gives me the same satisfaction as swearing. It's also better for my children's ears.

 

[Jedeye Sniv]

I like using the slang from beast wars/beasties.

Slag = fuck

What?? That's not how you use slag at all. Slag = whore/slut. It's an actual word with meaning and everything. ie my sister is a right slag.

 

[Dommo]

I substitute my cuss words for worse cuss words.

Don't make me avatar quote you!

 

[Tinabina]

sugar = shit

I use this as well. Sometimes extended to sugar honey iced tea or even just sugar honey.

 

[EVOL 100%]

In Korean I use older swear words that are actually more horrible than the newer ones. They often involve grisly deaths, the equivalent of 'fuck' doesn't have anything on them. They're a lot more socially acceptable though.

In English I just don't swear if I'm not supposed to.

 

[ReBurn]

Say what you mean. Don't hold back. An asshole is an asshole.

Man, I love Swiftkey and how it remembers bad words.

 

[WJD]

 

[Vagabundo]

Hover Dam
Shiitake Mushrooms.

 

[Camp Lo]

It's kind of cheating, but I've replaced a lot of swears with sod. As an American, I just love how it sounds.

"Sod off you sodding sod!"


Also bollocks.

Wow I thought I was the only American who loved the use of sod.

The "sod off dude" rolls off the tongue so well.

 

[Kiraly]

The JT posts in this thread are well hot

 

[pants]

"don't rustle my jimmies"

 

[demon]

god dammit -- bob saget

 

[sc0la]

I don't personally use it but "Shut the Front Door!" is a pretty great substitute for shut the fuck up when you don't believe some one

 

[Osiris]

Too much Father Ted* has led to me almost exclusively using "Feck" for several years now.

*

Spoiler

Can there possibly be such a thing as too much Father Ted? I think not!

 

[itwasTuesday]

I like jeez.

 

[wenis]

everything is usually replaced with "fudgin" or the first alternate word i can think of...

 

[injurai]

Cockney Slang is still the best way to swear.

 

[CharlieDigital]

"don't rustle my jimmies"

I like this, but I don't think the general public gets what it means.

I'm pretty sure my wife would be like "What the fuck are you talking about?"

 

[djSyndrome]

"Sod off you sodding sod!"

Which goes perfectly with your avatar.

 

[Zeppu]

I just use different languages:
fuck = cazzo
shit = Scheiße

etc...

cazzo means dick, not fuck.

 

[Buddha Beam]

Good ol' "mother pus bucket" never does me wrong when I can't say "mother fucker"

 

[Rubbish King]

I dont really feel the need to censor my language, but when i do i just prolong a sound if i accidentally do it in front of children like 'ah fffffffffffffffffffffffudge' the duration of the prolonged noise depends how long it takes for me to think of a word to replace fuck with...

 

[Mondriaan]

I watched too much Farscape and occasionally say "frell" when I really meant to say "fucking hell".

 

[UrbanRats]

cazzo means dick, not fuck.

Yeah but instead of "dick" it's never directed at anything specifically.
It works much like "fuck" or "shit", when you hit your toe against something, you say "cazzo", when you drop your phone in the toilet, you say "cazzo"; you don't call another person a "cazzo", so although it means dick, it's not used as dick.

 

[Milchjon]

Immanuel, as in Immanuel Kant. At least I'm trying to start doing it on GAF, but I suddenly realize that I never even really use the word it's supposed to replace.

 

[Zeppu]

Yeah but instead of "dick" it's never directed at anything specifically.
It works much like "fuck" or "shit", when you hit your toe against something, you say "cazzo", when you drop your phone in the toilet, you say "cazzo"; you don't call another person a "cazzo", so although it means dick, it's not used as dick.

Yeah yeah, I know italian, but the way he said it, it sounds like he just substitutes the word for the same in other languages since Scheiße does mean shit.

Testa di cazzo works well to insult other people though.

This ambiguity all stems from the immense versatility of the word fuck though.

 

[TheGreatDivide]

JT.

 

[Carlisle]

I've been using effing lately. And sometimes frack. But that's not really in line with the OP's examples because its obvious which word they're replacing. Don't think I have any like that though.

But my dad says God bless it instead of God damn it.

 

[Rocwell]

Good ol' "mother pus bucket" never does me wrong when I can't say "mother fucker"

I've been using that one lately too. Ghostbusters is my favorite.

Every now and then I'll say "middle finger" instead of mother fucker.

 

[Baconsaurus Rex]

Immanuel, as in Immanuel Kant. At least I'm trying to start doing it on GAF, but I suddenly realize that I never even really use the word it's supposed to replace.

I don't understand why you'd cuss with Immanuel Kant when calling someone a Hitler, Mao of Mussolini for example would seem way more offensive. If you want to keep this up though, then why don't you say Kant instead of Immanuel? Kant sounds similar enough to another cuss word that it might work

 

[Binabik15]

I read all the Ciaphas Cain novels and I now like to say frak or frakking and would looove to use "you sodding little grot-fondler".

I don't understand why you'd cuss with Immanuel Kant when calling someone a Hitler, Mao of Mussolini for example would seem way more offensive. If you want to keep this up though, then why don't you say Kant instead of Immanuel? Kant sounds similar enough to another cuss word that it might work

Kant, in its correct German pronounciation, sounds 100% like a certain banned word people who are speaking BE love to use, but recently got taken away from them.

By Grot-fondlers, I guess.

 

[Psychotext]

Knut.

People still largely react the same way though, which is amusing.

 

[TAJ]

I either swear like a sailor or keep my language completely clean. No faux swears that I can think of.

This.
Faux swears are sad at best and creepy at worst.

 

[kudos.]

Cripes or Jezzum Crepes.

 

[Tess3ract]

What's the point in saying pejoratives if you're not going to say them?

Just stop being a wuss and say the real word or don't say it at all.

 

[The Mana Legend]

Instead of cocksucker I say dicklicker.

Not the same meaning, but close.

 

[Rarity]

Nerds. What the what.

Thanks, 30 Rock.

 

[billy beane]

I like this, but I don't think the general public gets what it means.

I'm pretty sure my wife would be like "What the fuck are you talking about?"

Me and my friends use russle my jimmies when talking to each other, but when other people hear it they think it's some sexual term.

But fuck other people.

 

[The Awesomest]

Ohhhh diaper biscuits. Why don't you go blow it out your ear. That guy was kick-awesome.

..this and I hate the term "cuss words" it's swearing.

Swearing is for oaths. Cussing is for vulgarity and profanity.

 

[Coconut]

Butt nut seems to replace fuck nut for me.

 

[Atramental]

Fuggin is a nice alternative for fucking.

 

[Ein Bear]

I've always wondered, is 'damn' considered a swear word in the US? It seems to come up every now and then, and I always find it strange. It doesn't really count as one over here.

 

[Karakand]

Shazbot.

Spoiler

[VGS]

 

[The Awesomest]

I've always wondered, is 'damn' considered a swear word in the US? It seems to come up every now and then, and I always find it strange. It doesn't really count as one over here.

It's one of our second-tier words. It's sort of losing its edge, but it really depends on context.

 

[Coconut]

I've always wondered, is 'damn' considered a swear word in the US? It seems to come up every now and then, and I always find it strange. It doesn't really count as one over here.

In my mind I would think damn is like the worst since you are damning someone to suffer for forever.

 

[Devolution]

Curse in a non native language. Problem solved.