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Dating Age |OT$6| Just ask her out already

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Ray Wonder

Founder of the Wounded Tagless Children
Yeah but she told me when we first matched on Tinder she wasn't looking for a hookup.
To be honest, I felt it was going too fast and I guess she probably felt the same way too. One of the reasons why I'm not super bummed about this.

Here's what I think happened. She said she didn't want to hook up, but actually wanted to. Once she didn't get to because you cuddled for 3 hours in the car, she moved on. She was probably cuddling, waiting for you to make a move.

(ie. Lose some damn weight).

idk man I lost weight and now I have a kid on the way. It's kind of a big commitment
 

Salamando

Member
idk man I lost weight and now I have a kid on the way. It's kind of a big commitment

Keeping off the weight is always the hard part - it's a lifestyle change. Your lifestyle is causing you to gain that weight back, just not on your body!
Not yet your body anyway...dad bod ahoy!
 

Xun

Member
Congrats! Hope the date itself was good too!
It went well thanks!

Could you see anything more with this girl?
She's a lovely girl, but since we've only had 2 dates I'm not thinking about where things are going.

Whilst I'm not against entering a relationship at the moment, I'm not looking for one as such. I'm simply dating casually and going with the flow. I'm a "late bloomer" when it comes to dating and I lack experience, so I'm making up for lost time.

I got far too invested with the American girl I was dating late last year and I got pretty damn hurt when things ended. She was was the first girl I fell for (despite being 27), so I'm still struggling to completely get over her. As a positive though my mentality has changed when it comes to dating recently, so I'm approaching things differently to how I did in the past.

Anyway I'm seeing the girl again next Tuesday (she's busy this week), I have the postponed date with the Australian girl this Thursday and there's some other girls who want to meet up at some point as well.

I've honestly never felt more comfortable and confident in myself and it feels great.
 
Hey guys,


Speeddating yes or no? In my hometown they have this Speeddating thing this month and next month. It costs 33 euro and it lasts.... here it comes... 3 minutes. I will be talking to about 20 single ladies in that time. There will be two breaks where we can get a drink or talk some more.

Within 24 hours I will receive a matchmail where I will see my matches on my profile. The best dates are listed there and if there's a mutual match their email address will be listed there. If the person has uploaded a photo you will see this as well.


I am kinda curious about this and at the same time doubtful. Anyone here with any experience with this? On one hand I'm like... Why not give this a shot. I may meet my soulmate there. You just never know. Thing is, 3 minutes and 20 ladies to talk to, Jesus man. What am I gonna say?

What would you do?
 

Kyne

Member
Hey guys,


Speeddating yes or no? In my hometown they have this Speeddating thing this month and next month. It costs 33 euro and it lasts.... here it comes... 3 minutes. I will be talking to about 20 single ladies in that time. There will be two breaks where we can get a drink or talk some more.

Within 24 hours I will receive a matchmail where I will see my matches on my profile. The best dates are listed there and if there's a mutual match their email address will be listed there. If the person has uploaded a photo you will see this as well.


I am kinda curious about this and at the same time doubtful. Anyone here with any experience with this? On one hand I'm like... Why not give this a shot. I may meet my soulmate there. You just never know. Thing is, 3 minutes and 20 ladies to talk to, Jesus man. What am I gonna say?

What would you do?

Sounds really fun! Keep to the basics. Talk about hobbies, interests, favorite foods/books/tv shows/music. Maybe if it's not too personal talk about what you do for a living.

I'd love to go to something like that.. although not sure I'd have the courage to go alone.

If only I had a sword..

*goes back to playing BotW*
 
Hey guys,


Speeddating yes or no? In my hometown they have this Speeddating thing this month and next month. It costs 33 euro and it lasts.... here it comes... 3 minutes. I will be talking to about 20 single ladies in that time. There will be two breaks where we can get a drink or talk some more.

Within 24 hours I will receive a matchmail where I will see my matches on my profile. The best dates are listed there and if there's a mutual match their email address will be listed there. If the person has uploaded a photo you will see this as well.


I am kinda curious about this and at the same time doubtful. Anyone here with any experience with this? On one hand I'm like... Why not give this a shot. I may meet my soulmate there. You just never know. Thing is, 3 minutes and 20 ladies to talk to, Jesus man. What am I gonna say?

What would you do?

I did it years ago, waste of time. Even more so now with all the options of online dating. You'll get the same mix of women I did, hopeless women you're not attracted to, women looking for Brad Pitt and women you like BUT they are only there as moral support for the hopeless women. I got two matches, it ment as much as a match on Tinder to be honest. One ghosted and the other was not interested in dating but liked the attention I was giving her. I can't believe speeddating is still a thing!
 
Sounds really fun! I'd love to go to something like that.. although not sure I'd have the courage to go alone.

If only I had a sword.

*goes back to playing BotW*

Hahaha yep, BotW rules :)

As for this, you know what it is? I bet you wouldn't be the only one that feels like they don't have the courage and would be nervous. I haven't decidee yet but i bet if i go through with this i will be nervous too and highly doubt there won't be anyone else there that feels just like me. Thinking that way can really help.

I did it years ago, waste of time. Even more so now with all the options of online dating. You'll get the same mix of women I did, hopeless women you're not attracted to, women looking for Brad Pitt and women you like BUT they are only there as moral support for the hopeless women. I got two matches, it ment as much as a match on Tinder to be honest. One ghosted and the other was not interested in dating but liked the attention I was giving her. I can't believe speeddating is still a thing!


Hmmm ok, that's good to know and doesn't sound too great. Sounds like a waste of money as well then. I however do believe these speeddating things don't all necessarily have to be exactly the same as others. I could be lucky that i'm gonna be talking to some real nice people. However, how incredibly short is that chat when it's 20 ladies in 3 minutes? Good lord. Yeah i definitely haven't decided yet.
 

Kyne

Member
Hahaha yep, BotW rules :)

As for this, you know what it is? I bet you wouldn't be the only one that feels like they don't have the courage and would be nervous. I haven't decidee yet but i bet if i go through with this i will be nervous too and highly doubt there won't be anyone else there that feels just like me. Thinking that way can really help.

That's good advice, thanks.

Honestly right now I'm just working on myself and I'd rather spend my newfound free time catching up on games. I think that when I do jump back in to the dating pool I'll probably try online dating again (tried it 3 years ago, landed a gf that lasted 2+ years). Seemed to work out well then.
 

Salamando

Member
Hey guys,


Speeddating yes or no? In my hometown they have this Speeddating thing this month and next month. It costs 33 euro and it lasts.... here it comes... 3 minutes. I will be talking to about 20 single ladies in that time. There will be two breaks where we can get a drink or talk some more.

Within 24 hours I will receive a matchmail where I will see my matches on my profile. The best dates are listed there and if there's a mutual match their email address will be listed there. If the person has uploaded a photo you will see this as well.


I am kinda curious about this and at the same time doubtful. Anyone here with any experience with this? On one hand I'm like... Why not give this a shot. I may meet my soulmate there. You just never know. Thing is, 3 minutes and 20 ladies to talk to, Jesus man. What am I gonna say?

What would you do?

Went to two speed-dating events last year and I have no intention of going to one again, at least not with the same company. It was smaller in scope, 15 "dates" of 6 minutes each. I ended up with one date from each event, and each was a disaster in their own way. (Short version: one was hung up on their ex, the other was boring).

I got to look at the full match data, it was pretty sad. There were fewer matches than there were girls in attendance! Five matches alone were for the hottest girl there.

For the cost of admission, you're better off ponying up for some online dating premium features. It'll get you more dates. Or just spend that money at the bar.
 

Ozorov

Member
Another day, another heartbreak. A girl I was dating let me know that she was still "exploring her options" when I asked her about our relationship. Taking a break from the dating game. I'm mentally exhausted and need to work on myself (ie. Lose some damn weight).

feels.png
 

Ogodei

Member
Well, seems like the girl wasn't receptive to yesterday's ask, which is fine, i wasn't sure what all she was into besides food and beer.

I'll try knocking video games off of the "favorite things" list and see about handing out my name in the second message and see if it improves things.

I know i'm doing well with first-pass messages at least. Get a good number of those to at least view my profile.
 

Ashby

Member
Dating is weird. You'll go out with a girl, think it went just okay, keep focus on another girl you feel is more promising but then the girl you thought was kinda ehh will reach out and you'll start really like her? I didn't even think I'd be going out with this girl a second time but now I'm really looking forward to it.
 
I did it years ago, waste of time. Even more so now with all the options of online dating. You'll get the same mix of women I did, hopeless women you're not attracted to, women looking for Brad Pitt and women you like BUT they are only there as moral support for the hopeless women. I got two matches, it ment as much as a match on Tinder to be honest. One ghosted and the other was not interested in dating but liked the attention I was giving her. I can't believe speeddating is still a thing!
Nah, online dating can't compare to face to face speed-dating. You can still be matched online and it not work out on the first date. Here, you get all of it done in one go. Plus, it's fun!
33 euros for 3 minutes..... 🤔
With each girl, and the total is with 20 girls. So, more than an hour. You can usually tell if you fancy someone within the first minute, anyway.
 
Dating is weird. You'll go out with a girl, think it went just okay, keep focus on another girl you feel is more promising but then the girl you thought was kinda ehh will reach out and you'll start really like her? I didn't even think I'd be going out with this girl a second time but now I'm really looking forward to it.

But did you kiss them both on the first date?
I just came across the girl I broke up with the other day on Tinder.

:/ lol

Yes, people continue their existence after your break up with them.
 
Nah, online dating can't compare to face to face speed-dating. You can still be matched online and it not work out on the first date. Here, you get all of it done in one go. Plus, it's fun!

With each girl, and the total is with 20 girls. So, more than an hour. You can usually tell if you fancy someone within the first minute, anyway.

Actually i think it says 20 singles in 3 minutes. Which is pretty crazy if you think about it.
 

animax

Member
Actually i think it says 20 singles in 3 minutes. Which is pretty crazy if you think about it.

That can't be right man, makes zero sense. You can't logistically maneuver 40 people in pairs in 3 minutes. It's 3 minutes each girl

Can't do much with 9 seconds per girl

But good luck! You should do it
 

loudbill

Member
A girl told me i look older than my age (18), but also younger at the same time? Fuck online dating lol. Totally done with it, leads nowhere 99% of the time.

Well, dating irl is going to suck since im new to it, but you gotta start somewhere i guess. Not sure if i should even pursure it though because i dont have my own car yet (still saving up for one).
 
That can't be right man, makes zero sense. You can't logistically maneuver 40 people in pairs in 3 minutes. It's 3 minutes each girl

Can't do much with 9 seconds per girl

But good luck! You should do it

Yeah you're right. But i will make damn sure of this before i pay for this, believe that. :)

Nah, online dating can't compare to face to face speed-dating. You can still be matched online and it not work out on the first date. Here, you get all of it done in one go. Plus, it's fun!

With each girl, and the total is with 20 girls. So, more than an hour. You can usually tell if you fancy someone within the first minute, anyway.

If i do this, do you have any advice for me? This whole thing is new for me and i assume i'll be the first one doing the introduction. I guess i just say who i am, my age, what i do, what my interests are and what i look for in a woman?
 

Llyranor

Member
I've never done speed-dating, but I think most people do an interview format (who you are, job, hobbies/interests, etc). How about spending those 3 min on a random conversation topic? That could be a better personality compatibility test, and if it goes well they'll want to go on a real date with you where you could fill in the other details. You could even use GAF threads as topics; pineapple on pizza, why does do italian toilets not have toilet seats, circumcision, etc
 
I've never done speed-dating, but I think most people do an interview format (who you are, job, hobbies/interests, etc). How about spending those 3 min on a random conversation topic? That could be a better personality compatibility test, and if it goes well they'll want to go on a real date with you where you could fill in the other details. You could even use GAF threads as topics; pineapple on pizza, why does do italian toilets not have toilet seats, circumcision, etc

"Which member of the Wu-Tang Clan would you say is your spirit animal?"

"RZA"

"Aight, we're done here. Your place or mine?"
 

Salamando

Member
I've never done speed-dating, but I think most people do an interview format (who you are, job, hobbies/interests, etc). How about spending those 3 min on a random conversation topic? That could be a better personality compatibility test, and if it goes well they'll want to go on a real date with you where you could fill in the other details. You could even use GAF threads as topics; pineapple on pizza, why does do italian toilets not have toilet seats, circumcision, etc

Yep. You've got three minutes to make yourself stand out amongst a crowd of 29 other men...you won't do that by going the obvious conversation routes. Introduce yourself, sure, just quickly turn the conversation to something fun and memorable.

If she asks what your job is, don't use the word "engineer". Might just be my town, but every guy at my speed dating thing was playing up their job with an "engineer" title. Don't care if it's your actual title, it doesn't stand out if everyone's saying the same thing.
 
Everyone says that. When they're making out with you in the car on the first date, that's a signal that they were bullshitting.

This.

I had a first date with a girl that said exactly the same thing at the beginning of the date. Even went as far as saying I wouldn't be going back to hers because she didn't want me thinking she was easy or that type of girl.

An hour into the date she makes the first move. She couldn't keep her hands of me at the sporting event we went too. We then went to a bar and again she was literally all over me. That was the cue to ask should we continue back at hers, and of course she said yes and sex was had as soon as we got through the door.

For a girl that apparently doesn't do hook ups she had a lot of condoms in her bedside draws....
 
This.

I had a first date with a girl that said exactly the same thing at the beginning of the date. Even went as far as saying I wouldn't be going back to hers because she didn't want me thinking she was easy or that type of girl.

An hour into the date she makes the first move. She couldn't keep her hands of me at the sporting event we went too. We then went to a bar and again she was literally all over me. That was the cue to ask should we continue back at hers, and of course she said yes and sex was had as soon as we got through the door.

For a girl that apparently doesn't do hook ups she had a lot of condoms in her bedside draws....

Yep. It's mostly nonsense in my experience.
 

Kopite

Member
Everyone says that. When they're making out with you in the car on the first date, that's a signal that they were bullshitting.
It's odd though, because when we were fooling around I was already fingering her and got her shirt off. But she still said she wasn't down for sex because apparently she's a virgin and isn't ready for it yet. Even when I said goodbye(it was 4 in the morning and I had an interview the next day) she gave me a super long hug. And then she texted me when she got home.

Oh well, like I said I felt it was going really quickly, and had that fear if commitment for a bit there.
 
Yep. You've got three minutes to make yourself stand out amongst a crowd of 29 other men...you won't do that by going the obvious conversation routes. Introduce yourself, sure, just quickly turn the conversation to something fun and memorable.

If she asks what your job is, don't use the word "engineer". Might just be my town, but every guy at my speed dating thing was playing up their job with an "engineer" title. Don't care if it's your actual title, it doesn't stand out if everyone's saying the same thing.

Sandwich engineer.
 
This.

I had a first date with a girl that said exactly the same thing at the beginning of the date. Even went as far as saying I wouldn't be going back to hers because she didn't want me thinking she was easy or that type of girl.

An hour into the date she makes the first move. She couldn't keep her hands of me at the sporting event we went too. We then went to a bar and again she was literally all over me. That was the cue to ask should we continue back at hers, and of course she said yes and sex was had as soon as we got through the door.

For a girl that apparently doesn't do hook ups she had a lot of condoms in her bedside draws....

I tell girls that my kink is monogamous sex with someone I have an emotional connection with.

First dates always lead to stuff. Like, 95% of them.
 

artsi

Member
I got a second date with the older woman on thursday, booked younger one for friday.
I love how the older one especially is totally zero BS, I asked if she was available again before weekend and she came up with a date and time immediately.
 

Clockwork5

Member
So I've been out of the game for a few years due to back to back heartbreaking endings to long term relationships. A friend of a friend has been frequenting the restaurant I manage and always seems to be excited to see me.

Well, I made a huge first step and asked if she would like to go out sometime and we exchanged numbers (yes!).

We have texted a few times and I asked her out to dinner on Sunday... so here I sit waiting for a reply.

Ugh, it feels like I have no idea what I am doing again; it's been too long, I guess. I have my fingers crossed.
 
God, I get why dating multiple people at the same time is a good idea, but I'm already feeling anxious about it. I had three dates with three different women this week, all of which went pretty well. They're all so sweet and I don't want to hurt anybody's feelings, especially since I'm fairly sure I'm the only guy two of them are talking to. ;~;
 

Ashby

Member
God, I get why dating multiple people at the same time is a good idea, but I'm already feeling anxious about it. I had three dates with three different women this week, all of which went pretty well. They're all so sweet and I don't want to hurt anybody's feelings, especially since I'm fairly sure I'm the only guy two of them are talking to. ;~;

I've been dating one woman for about two months. I have a second date with a girl on Friday and a first date on Saturday. Plus I've been flirting with a friend and there's another Tinder chick I could ask out but haven't yet. It does kind of make me feel like shit but then I remember you've gotta be selfish to find the one.
 
I've been dating one woman for about two months. I have a second date with a girl on Friday and a first date on Saturday. Plus I've been flirting with a friend and there's another Tinder chick I could ask out but haven't yet. It does kind of make me feel like shit but then I remember you've gotta be selfish to find the one.

Do any of the women you're seeing know that you're dating other people? I'm already having to lie about what I've been doing when any of them ask me.
 
Do any of the women you're seeing know that you're dating other people? I'm already having to lie about what I've been doing when any of them ask me.

I think therein lies your problem.

Why lie? Be honest with them.

If they get jealous that's on them. If they talk about exclusivity then be honest with them on that too.

I think you're stressing yourself out when you don't have to.
 
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