What for god's sake? Can't I share my personal experience? What is the issue?
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Being black makes me not want to go outside sometimes
- Thread starter M52B28
- Start date
What for god's sake? Can't I share my personal experience? What is the issue?
A little bit shocked that is so bad in San Francisco, similar to rest of country. I dunno if it has been answered in rest of thread, but does the reaction at all change by the type of clothing you are wearing, ie, is it a black man in a hoodie effect or do you get the same reactions no matter what you wear?
Spring-Loaded
Member
Lamel
Banned
The best is when you're in an establishment filled with only white people and you end up being the one brown dude in the room. At first I was weirded out because you could feel everyone just looking at you. But then I started making eye contact with them and smiling, made things a lot more fun.
excelsiorlef
Member
You immediately assumed it probably wasn't racism based on nothing but your personal preference that you then universalized.
Irrelevant. Like so utterly irrelevant.
Gordon Shumway
Banned
Slightly related. Made me think of the statement by Rza.
C.R.E.A.M!
LookAtMeGo
Member
The stinklith hath spoketh.
Gordon Shumway
Banned
Praise be..
Captin Quacker
Member
Bout time geez
Vermillion
Banned
Eh. I feel like it could easily be racism just as it could be other factors.
'Cuz it's like - when I was younger and way more shy, I would be hyper-conscious of things like that. Rarely amounted to anything. As I got older, I stopped paying much attention. I live in a pretty liberal area, granted... But according to the OP, so do you?
Tl;Dr - it can be a mix of things.
EDIT: At night, that's basically how things go lol. Idk how white people feel, but seems normal.
In the day... I either ignore people or smile at them.
'Cuz it's like - when I was younger and way more shy, I would be hyper-conscious of things like that. Rarely amounted to anything. As I got older, I stopped paying much attention. I live in a pretty liberal area, granted... But according to the OP, so do you?
Tl;Dr - it can be a mix of things.
EDIT: At night, that's basically how things go lol. Idk how white people feel, but seems normal.
In the day... I either ignore people or smile at them.
BrutishMrFish
Member
Messofanego shared his experience of being avoided by white people due to the color of his skin, and you came in here saying that you avoid everyone. The issue is that you came off as preemptively defending yourself from something that didn't even apply to you in the first place.
Also, only 6.8% of Americans suffer from social anxiety disorder and up to 10% suffer from it in the UK, and you're assuming that something like that is more likely than racism when almost half of US voters supported Trump and half of UK voters supported Brexit. So what's more likely: the idea that black and brown people often experience racism, or that they all just happened to bump into people with anxiety disorders multiple times over the course of their lives?
Sources on SAD:
https://adaa.org/about-adaa/press-room/facts-statistics
https://www.nice.org.uk/guidance/cg159/documents/social-anxiety-disorder-final-scope2
Exactly, its really tiring trying to share your experience only to get it dismissed and diagnosed by armchair psychologists as anxiety.
Whats the point of even having a discussion on racism if your going to be told that your experience is imaginary.
hey_monkey
Banned
I know others have addressed you but also consider: you are one person rationalizing, or attempting to, based on your one-person experience. What are the odds every single person OP and others in this thread have encountered are exactly like you in a world designed for a majority that is NOT like you? (As in seats next to other seats, etc.)
That's just a numbers game, my dude.
Subpar Spatula
Banned
I always viewed seating as an attractive scale. Like, I'll be on the train, empty seat next to me, get to station, people enter, I spot the cutie, think "sit next to me :3", nope, dude taking in 3 garbage bags of bottles for me.
Gordon Shumway
Banned
You gotta live, man..
And I tell you commuters avoiding sitting next to each other is a common thing. There has been a study even for it that proves it true http://eu.wiley.com/WileyCDA/PressRelease/pressReleaseId-104368.html Messofanego at his original post said people just prefered to stand instead of sitting next to him, I tried to tell him that maybe it is because of the above common phenomenon. He later added that people would sit next to a white person as soon as they had the opportunity and not him and I admitted that yeah then it is racism. Why do you all gang up on a person who diverts from the common idea? Just because I dared to share my personal experience?
hey_monkey
Banned
It's not the same. (ETA: I'm not disputing people prefer not to cram in. I'm disputing you denying that there is also a pervasive element of racism.)
There may be some overlap. It's still not the same.
Insisting it is doesn't make it the same.
If you can't extrapolate logically, there's research on this. Go read.
I don't understand why you make all that fuss when I admitted it is racism after he provided the crucial information that they prefered to sit next to a white person after the sit was freed. Like what else do you want?
Ravensmash
Member
As someone who prefers to stand on the tube and doesn't take seats even when I'm in the middle of the carriage (crazy right?) I'm sorry.
I hate sitting on the tube
Gordon Shumway
Banned
I guess I'll ask again, since you must have missed it..why can't it just be racism? Why do you feel like you're being "ganged up on" when being asked that question? If I had to erase my life long experiences to give you the benefit of the doubt, why does it only work one way?
The man is telling you that folks are VOCALLY mentioning him and his presence. The reason YOU do what YOU do is irrelevant in this scenario, no?
Messofanego
Banned
Mental issues over acknowledging racism, so still the same narrative
Racism is a touchy subject and you made it about you. It's kinda tone deaf. Even if you didn't mean to, it comes off as trying to downplay the possibility of racism with a knee jerk alternative explanation.
Gordon Shumway
Banned
Mental issues over acknowledging racism, so still the same narrative
Hey. Dylann was CLEARLY mental, so.........
I would just like to point out that we have topics about a neighbor walking out and about naked and someone recording conversations for God knows what and no one questions their validity of their respective OPs. And before you ask, I believe those guys are telling the truth.
One black man made a topic about being upset of discrimination towards him and a higher ratio of GAFers don't believe him, think he's exaggerating, or is blaming him like this quote.
It REALLY makes you think.
I had this happen to me once, it's pretty long time ago but I still remember it since I was quite offended and even bit hurt. I'm white, so that's probably why it has only happened once. And I can't imagine how it would be to be treated like that on a regular basis. Well probably fucked up, but still.
Anybody else ever get the super fast click of the now-locked car door when walking through a parking lot to or from your own car?
As though Im going to plainly walk up on a bright and sunny afternoon and snatch you out of your car. Or maybe jump in with you? Idk. To do what? Really? I cant just be going into Whole Foods, because thats not what black people do, I guess.
As though Im going to plainly walk up on a bright and sunny afternoon and snatch you out of your car. Or maybe jump in with you? Idk. To do what? Really? I cant just be going into Whole Foods, because thats not what black people do, I guess.
SlackAdjuster
Member
I'm not black but get the same type of reactions often. Sometimes it sucks. And sometimes I enjoy not being bothered lol.
I guess I sort of look like a "biker". I've been asked in black areas of town if I'm in the Hells Angels. Asked if I'm a skinhead. Devil worshipper, etc hahaha. I've never ridden a motorcycle in my life. I once got into a fight at a concert with several skinheads because they were being assholes to somebody for no reason and I stuck up for them. I guess I do look sort of "mean" or whatever. Resting asshole face? Is that a thing?
My daughter was laughing at the last Cavs game we went to once I pointed it out to her. We were sitting on the end of the row and people would NOT ask me to stand up so they could get to their seats. They stop an extra row down, ask them and then climb up to their seats. Shits crazy.
I guess I sort of look like a "biker". I've been asked in black areas of town if I'm in the Hells Angels. Asked if I'm a skinhead. Devil worshipper, etc hahaha. I've never ridden a motorcycle in my life. I once got into a fight at a concert with several skinheads because they were being assholes to somebody for no reason and I stuck up for them. I guess I do look sort of "mean" or whatever. Resting asshole face? Is that a thing?
My daughter was laughing at the last Cavs game we went to once I pointed it out to her. We were sitting on the end of the row and people would NOT ask me to stand up so they could get to their seats. They stop an extra row down, ask them and then climb up to their seats. Shits crazy.
Stead Fast
Banned
I would just like to point out that we have topics about a neighbor walking out and about naked and someone recording conversations for God knows what and no one questions their validity of their respective OPs. And before you ask, I believe those guys are telling the truth.
One black man made a topic about being upset of discrimination towards him and a higher ratio of GAFers don't believe him, think he's exaggerating, or is blaming him like this quote.
It REALLY makes you think.
Indeed, I've been poking my head in here from time to time, but the regularity in which an alternative to 'sorry that happened to you man, fucking racial stereotyping is what that is, if the other person is the one worried; fuck 'em, you've done nothing wrong' is embarrassing.
PixelatedBookake
Junior Member
I don't get that feeling when I just go outside day to day due to my location being mostly black, but when I'm in come of my college classes where my classmates are predominantly college age white males, I can't help but feel super uncomfortable. Last semester where, after the election, almost every white classmate of mine in my IT class came out as Trump supporters (even the Professor!), I can't help but feel uneasy when it's mostly white people around me. I don't know where there allegiances lie, y'know?
D
Deleted member 17706
Unconfirmed Member
Goddamn... that must be simultaneously frustrating, aggravating, and awkward as hell all at the same time. I can't even imagine.
PixelatedBookake
Junior Member
I felt betrayed bruh. Like everyone came out of the woodwork and exposed themselves for who they really were. As we all walked in the class the professor was even passing out candy as celebration. I didn't even know why until she explained it later. It lowkey almost made me quit IT as my major. I was gonna talk to the other black guy in my class about it but I was too shook. The day after the election was a dark day for us man. You could feel it in the air.
I don't let this stuff bother me when it happens, but I've had to deal with since I was a kid. I lived in west Baltimore and my mother worked in a mostly white area in east Baltimore. I often went to work with her during the summer and noticed all of reactions of people when I turned eight. Even the ladies that didn't cross the street or looked at me and smiled still held their purses tighter. I tried not to speak because I got sick of hearing how well I spoke.I hated going in stores and when I got old enough to take the bus on my own the police would slow down or stop at the bus stop I was at.
Now I just tune it out. I still notice it but it doesn't bother me as much.
Now I just tune it out. I still notice it but it doesn't bother me as much.
The Faceless Master
Member
that's exactly the point.
to tell you to stfu and stay in your lane and let racism continue on.
SonicXtreme
Member
at gund arena I usually just go to the row in front/behind people if it involves passing less people than my aisle, especially if my aisle has more kids, it's honestly way easier and you don't get soda or whatever accidentially spilled on you in those tiny aisles, plus i'd rather accidentially step on an adults foot than a little kids'
OG Shaka Zulu
Member
I know you don't mean any harm but.... ! I am 100% jeans and button up in public yet i still might as well be an open carry AK-47 wielding person at night. I literally saw a blonde haired blue eyed white girl with a fitted hat and hoodie on my block last week and was a little bit annoyed and made a mental note on how its considered cute or "different" on her but its gang affiliation for me when I wear the same, even though I am an attorney.
Like someone posted, the Civil Rights photos are all people in church clothes yet they are still treated like animals or criminals. Its not the clothing homey! Melanin is the aggravater.
Massive Duck. C.M.
Banned
Cot damn, I dunno if I could have stayed in that class.
Attack You
Member
When the Treyvon Martin thing just happened, I was neck-deep into my routine of jogging around my neighborhood at 4am in a grey hoodie. Had black neighbors ask me to quit doing that because Martin wore a grey hoodie and they were sure I was gonna get tagged over it. Nah. Fuck living in fear. One jackass did try to hit me with his pick-up truck one random morning, though.
NintendoGal
Member
Thank you very much for the link!
More to the point...
SO FUCKING STOP COMING TO THE THREAD AND TELLING THE OP TO STOP COMPLAINING OR GASLIGHTING THEM THX!
Sorry... just how I feel...
"I'm black and I get pulled over by the cops for no reason every week."
Replies:
Replies:
"I'm a cop and I pull over white people every month."
"Do you have anxiety? I used to think cops were pulling me over for no reason but it was just my brain going into overdrive. Rationally, I knew they weren't but my brain reacted that way regardless. "
"What if you dress fancy in a suit and tie?"
"Reading the examples in this thread, I find myself questioning if it's race thing or just a 'dude driving' thing, because I'm super white and I've been pulled over before."
"I'm white, and I've had plenty of situations where I've been pulled over before."
"If it makes you feel any better, in my next life, I want to be Idris Elba or Michael Jordan. Seriously though, every black friend I have instantly becomes one of my best friends. Coolest people. It sucks that you let these things get to you. "
"Do you have anxiety? I used to think cops were pulling me over for no reason but it was just my brain going into overdrive. Rationally, I knew they weren't but my brain reacted that way regardless. "
"What if you dress fancy in a suit and tie?"
"Reading the examples in this thread, I find myself questioning if it's race thing or just a 'dude driving' thing, because I'm super white and I've been pulled over before."
"I'm white, and I've had plenty of situations where I've been pulled over before."
"If it makes you feel any better, in my next life, I want to be Idris Elba or Michael Jordan. Seriously though, every black friend I have instantly becomes one of my best friends. Coolest people. It sucks that you let these things get to you. "
Renegade Frost
Banned
Thank you very much for the link!
More to the point...
SO FUCKING STOP COMING TO THE THREAD AND TELLING THE OP TO STOP COMPLAINING OR GASLIGHTING THEM THX!
Sorry... just how I feel...
Apologizing is a tell tale sign of abuse
Were you abused?
I've seen the abuse. It's gotta stop. we gotta stop letting y'all hurt us.
