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[hitme]

Simple things as in most people are able to do, but not you.

I can't ride a bike.
I can't swim.
I can't solve a rubix cube.

What says you GAF?

 

[Acorn]

I also can't ride a bike.

 

[Jombie]

Live a functional life.

 

[rootbeerafloat]

Swim, whistle

 

[Hazmat]

Solving a Rubik's cube isn't simple. You can look up solutions, but the vast majority of the population couldn't commit one to memory or solve it alone.

I can't drive a car with a manual transmission.

 

[Icyflamez96]

Simple things as in most people are able to do, but not you.

I can't ride a bike.
I can't swim.
I can't solve a rubix cube.

What says you GAF?

one of these is not like the other

 

[liquidtmd]

I have difficulty remembering names, or I appreciate I have to try harder than most may.

My memory otherwise is good

 

[CoyoteSpitfire]

Drive a car.

Form relationships of any significant kind.

Anything productive honestly.

 

[Chuckie]

Use that piece of shit. Gimme a piece of cheese, that cutter...and I will murder the cheese.
I can get off a couple of slices but after that I am going to break the cheese.

 

[Master Of Illusion]

Love.

 

[panty]

Why the hell can't you ride a bike or swim?

E: Assuming you're not disabled or paralyzed or anything, just curious.

 

[thequickandthedead]

Tie a tie

 

[Hellwarden]

Can't whistle.

Really, really struggle to remember names.

Just can't hold onto them.

 

[Frozenprince]

Never been able to whistle.

 

[takriel]

Have sex. I'm functional, but have no desire to.

 

[J_ToSaveTheDay]

Can't convince myself to get a credit card -- fucking terrified of debt (and already have student loan debt)

 

[Shadow Broker]

Swim

I suffer from PTSD so things like gatherings, get together, meetings, and sometimes driving. I usually spend some holidays alone because of it.

Memory issues from a TBI

Read and write cursive

Couple more that I can't think of right now

 

[Bakercat]

Since I'm an American, I've never held a gun or shot one. I have/had a BB gun and played paintball, but never a real firearm though. Also, I have to be one of the worst cooks to have ever live. If it ain't microwaveable or soup in a can that you boil on a stovetop I can't cook it. I've tried so many times to cook simple shit like eggs, but I screw it up every time.

Edit: like others here, I am horrible with remembering names aswell. I always hate walking into a room with a bunch of new people and having to greet them all one after another. I literally will forget your name by the time I get to the next person's name because I am a doofus and can't hold onto more than one name at a time lol. I always have to lean over to my fiancé and ask her what a person's name is, especially in movies.

 

[____]

Shoot a basketball.
Catch a football.
Dance.
Trust people (lol)

And I’m actually in decent shape. Pretty good shape as of late actually but just sadly uncoordinated with a lot of things. Even despite having a kinda athletic body, I can’t do anything athletic except work out and run. I mean, I’ve done the Spartan race twice (Sprint and Super) and ran a plenty of 5k races. But actual sports? A middle schooler can do better than I can.

And when it comes to dancing, I hate hearing the “stop lying! of course you can dance - you’re black...” when I tell people I can’t dance. But I really can’t unless I’m drunk lol.

 

[wandering]

Be happy

 

[GoutPatrol]

Tie my shoes using what the standard method. Just never learned, still doing bunny ears.

 

[Prodigal Son]

small talk with people my age

 

[Jacob]

I can't whistle either (I feel a little better seeing I'm not the only one here).

I can't blow bubbles with bubblegum (though I haven't even tried in years despite chewing a lot of gum).

 

[Syf]

Roll my r's. I just sound like a total doofus when I try.

 

[Banzai]

I can't roll my tongue. I'm the only one in the family that can't dot it and they keep mocking me for it.

 

[Trigonometrize.]

I'm very bad at figuring out how to use a mechanical thing on the fly. The teacher will ask me to open the window and I'll spend at least 30 seconds trying to figure out if it's locked or not, where the lock is, and what I need to do to get it unlocked. That sort of thing.

 

[liquidtmd]

small talk with people my age

God yes, I have little desire to Smalltalk and quite bad at it when I do.

People sometimes probably think I'm either aloof or rude but those that know me just know that's my way. I genuinely care a lot

 

[Jzero]

• Remember stuff
• Keep a small talk conversation going
• Drive manual
• Parallel park

 

[Gen X]

I play all sports (tennis, cricket, golf, 8 ball, ten pin etc) right handed yet I can't write with my right, I write left handed.

 

[Markitron]

I can't click my fingers.

 

[Phased]

I have had fine motor skill problems basically my entire life, the only thing it really impacts is my ability to draw a straight line or shapes, which makes writing nearly impossible unless I focus an extreme amount and slow down to a crawl. If I don't it is just an unreadable mess, there isn't even any consistency to it so you can't really find patterns.

My hands don't shake or anything, just something is broken when it comes to my brain telling my hands or fingers to draw a shape or straight line.

I'm very very lucky I became an adult right as the computer age/internet was booming and actually writing stuff on paper was falling a bit out of style. It really messed with me as a kid and I imagine if I grew up even 20 years earlier my life would be extremely difficult. Nowadays I basically never have to write except when signing for something, and legibility doesn't much matter there.

Maybe not 'riding a bike' levels of simple, but it's something most people may find easy that I can't do.

 

[NoblesseOblige]

I can't stand people.

 

[SecretMoblin]

 

[Xe4]

I have a difficult time pronouncing "R's". It's a speech impediment and I spent a while in speech therapy trying to fix it when I was younger. I'm usually good with it nowadays, but I make the occasional fuck up and get stupidly embarrassed.

 

[Kitsunebaby]

I also can't ride a bike. Or roller skate. Or skateboard. Really anything with wheels that isn't a car. My sense of balance on those things is just complete shit.

I'm sure there's other stuff, but I can't think of them at the moment.

 

[Van Bur3n]

I can't whistle or snap my fingers.

Tie my shoes using what the standard method. Just never learned, still doing bunny ears.

This makes me curious. Have I been tying my shoes through the bunny ears method this entire time outside of a standard method that is unbeknown to me?

 

[Jake.]

partially because i've rented for my entire life, i can't do anything remotely 'manly' or DIY (even simple shit like hanging a picture) around the house.

 

[Ryouji Gunblade]

I can't easily be verbally spelled at. You gotta slow down a bit. My brain just doesn't put auditory letters together that fast. Maybe it's a specific type of dyslexia?

A number sequence is easy for me, as it doesn't form a larger word.

 

[amanset]

Use that piece of shit. Gimme a piece of cheese, that cutter...and I will murder the cheese.
I can get off a couple of slices but after that I am going to break the cheese.

It is really only designed for a certain type of hard cheese, the ones with the plasticy consistency that means it will still hold together. A decent Cheddar will fall apart using one.

I can't whistle or click my fingers.

 

[____]

Oh, And I also can’t stop watching porn. Anyone got any pointers?

 

[Rad-]

Writing a signature. Whenever I have to write it I just do it in basic cursive. I have even gotten a few jokish remarks about it in professional setting.

 

[Xe4]

This makes me curious. Have I been tying my shoes through the bunny ears method this entire time outside of a standard method that is unbeknown to me?

This is the "standard" method.

This is "bunny ears". The difference is you make two loops and tie them instead of wraping lace around one and passing it through. More people do the standard, mostly because it lasts longer before becoming untied. Bunny ears is easier for kids to learn though, so it's useful in that regard.

 

[amanset]

Roll my r's. I just sound like a total doofus when I try.

Good one, forgot about that. I can't either, which means there are certain words I will never be able to pronounce properly in Swedish, for example "berg" (mountain), due to the very subtle roll that is required.

 

[SPCTRE]

I can't whistle with any of the techniques that involve your fingers

 

[nampad]

Can't whistle well, sometimes a meager sound comes out and that's te best I can do.

Why the hell can't you ride a bike or swim?

E: Assuming you're not disabled or paralyzed or anything, just curious.

Not being able to swim is quite common in non developed countries. People don't have the luxury of proper training.
My wife grew in a big tourist city with miles and miles of beautiful beaches and she swims really bad.

 

[Xe4]

Roll my r's. I just sound like a total doofus when I try.

I can't whistle with any of the techniques that involve your fingers

Also these two. Wherever I try to roll my R's I sound like an idiot. It's not a big deal in English, but I sound like an idiot whenever I'm around a Spanish speaker (which is a lot in New Mexico).

And I don't understand how people whistle with their fingers at all.

 

[nekkid]

I can't whistle with any of the techniques that involve your fingers

I really wish I could do this.

 

[Tounsi_Tag]

Swim, whistle

Same
I can't swim no matter how many times my friends try to teach me in pools, beaches and oceans.

 

[Yohane]

Make friends IRL.

 

[Rentahamster]

I can't stop posting on neogaf.