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[Trey]

I just don't see how it's disrespectful. To me, this method is significantly more disrespectful.

In my mind:
I can be alone with anyone because I would never cheat on my wife = Respectful
I won't eat alone with someone of the opposite sex because i know I'd cheat on my wife the second i had the chance = Disrespectful

Maybe I'm over simplifying it

your way of looking at it is just as valid. it's a security, comfortability thing. Flip it the other way and ask yourself if someone of the opposite sex told you they didn't feel comfortable being alone with you because they think it to be disrespectful to their significant other, how would you respond? Or put yourself into the significant others'. Everyone will have a different answer for each situation. And trying to police others' comfortability with a situation is rarely a smart move. Especially when it's a situation that isn't that important, and one where a solution is easily found (e.g: have more people around).

My problem with this entire situation are the responses trying to defend Pence's original position, which are almost uniformly stupid.

 

[The Lamp]

Uh yeah this is a thing. Pretty easy to identify. Christians want to avoid temptations or opportunity for sin. Some of them see alcohol and unsupervised company with the opposite sex as opportunity to be seduced, so some of them have "house rules" on what circumstances they can have private meetings with the opposite sex. Of course, most people are okay with business lunch, but just one meal could turn into an attraction, it happens all the time with people, and cheating happens all the time, so it's not surprising some Christians are strict on this.

He's also the VP so obviously they might want to protect themselves from a scandal that may or may not be true, depending on the honesty of the person he is meeting.

I don't mind my SO eating privately with men but I also know when they do it and I trust them with that. There's different levels of trust and awareness in each relationship.

I just don't see how it's disrespectful. To me, this method is significantly more disrespectful.

In my mind:
I can be alone with anyone because I would never cheat on my wife = Respectful
I won't eat alone with someone of the opposite sex because i know I'd cheat on my wife the second i had the chance = Disrespectful

Maybe I'm over simplifying it

You are oversimplifying it.

It's a precaution, not an assumption, that reducing opportunities for attractive sexes to meet in private reduces the risk that someone's judgment could lapse and infidelity could occur. To pretend couples are immunute to infidelity would be naivety given the statistics and reality of how often it happens, especially by mistake with the wrong place and wrong time.

I'm not saying we should live paranoid lives. I'm just saying some people take more precautions, live more on the paranoid side, because of religious reasons or the nature of their relationship. Hell, maybe Mike's marriage has suffered private infidelity and these are their "house rules" for protecting their marriage now.

 

[Mackenzie 92]

Why isn't he worried about having spontaneous sex with men he might meet?

Everytime should just be done by telephone from now on.

pretty sure he is

 

[norm9]

So a teacher should never meet with a female student based on fear of the student lying about sex that didn't happen?

Smh.

If a teacher values their job and reputation, they absolutely should not meet with ANY student by themselves.

This whole thing would just be a weird quirk for Mike Pence, if he wasn't the VP of the United States.

 

[BarringGaffner]

seems like conservative Islam and Christianity still have some things in common!

 

[OriginofHysteria]

If a teacher values their job and reputation, they absolutely should not meet with ANY student by themselves.

This whole thing would just be a weird quirk for Mike Pence, if he wasn't the VP of the United States.

Well if you were Pence, you'd also like to think this minimizes any sort of scandal on his end and would especially be a way to protect his reputation as being the poster boy for Christianity in the U.S.

 

[Shadow Puppetry]

Speaking of Pence, lookie what he did.

Vice President Pence on Thursday cast a tie-breaking procedural vote that allowed the Senate to move forward with an effort to nix an Obama-era rule that blocked states from defunding healthcare providers for political reasons.

Pence appeared on the floor after a procedural vote stalled in a 50-50 tie, casting the 51st vote in favor.

“They're pushing this resolution so hard today to the point where they bring the vice president to break a tie, it's safe to bet that Republicans are going to try to attach riders to take away Planned Parenthood funding in the spending bill for the rest of the year,” said Murray—the No. 3 Senate Democrat.

 

[norm9]

Well if you were Pence, you'd also like to think this minimizes any sort of scandal on his end and would especially be a way to protect his reputation as being the poster boy for Christianity in the U.S.

That's true. He's playing to his base and doubling down as a true man of faith. And it's not like the VP does anything important anyways.

 

[ZOONAMI]

If a teacher values their job and reputation, they absolutely should not meet with ANY student by themselves.

This whole thing would just be a weird quirk for Mike Pence, if he wasn't the VP of the United States.

Yeah I wasn't thinking about this the right way. I agree not outside of school, but if it's just helping someone briefly after class with the door open it shouldn't be an issue.

 

[Derwind]

I really don't get the problem here. Even as a woman, I see this as a non-issue.

The article referenced never says he refuses to eat with women, he just won't eat with them alone. Another party at the table (man or woman) is helpful, and honestly, I can see the reasoning for it. The media loves to gossip and find scandal everywhere, and anything can be quickly taken out of context including a simple business lunch. Additionally, even though I am no fan of Pence, I commend anyone who knows their personal limitations and sets boundaries to prevent temptation.

I find the snide remarks against him rather confusing, but I guess that is because I generally act in the same manner. I don't drink in public for the very reason it lowers inhibitions and puts me at greater risk of finding trouble or getting into it, or possibly saying something I may later regret. I am also not interested in venturing out with men I hardly know, even for business, alone and without company although my reasoning is different. The behavior is the same though.

Of all the things to get fussed over, or deride someone for, this all seems so benign.

I ask this as a guy, why would I have to worry about eating food in the presence of a female colleague alone? And is this just isolated to consuming food around those of the opposite sex? Where is the fear coming from?

Again is it solely stemming from simply being "alone" physically or socially with someone of the opposite sex?

Because that doesn't seem like a benign issue.

 

[Akuun]

Is every social interaction a porn scenario for this guy?

 

[pa22word]

So a teacher should never meet with a female student based on fear of the student lying about sex that didn't happen?

Smh.

A male teacher putting himself in a room alone with a little girl is a recipe for very efficient life destruction. Sure the chances of little girl getting upset and making stuff up is low, but why in the hell would you ever take that risk when there's no reason to? My cousin is a teacher and his school actually has active protocol for this, telling male staff to call a female staff member into the room whenever they have to be put into a disciplinary role with girls.

Personally if a girl is sub 18 and I don't intimately know the family or is close family I wouldn't want to be alone with them. Ever. As a man once you hit a certain age you get "call the police" looks for even smiling at a little girl who bumped into you in the grocery store in a rando encounter. Just is what it is.

 

[Earthbound64]

So a teacher should never meet with a female student based on fear of the student lying about sex that didn't happen?

Smh.

Yeah I wasn't thinking about this the right way. I agree not outside of school, but if it's just helping someone briefly after class with the door open it shouldn't be an issue.

Unfortunately, that's not the world we live in - or have for the past 20 years.

A male teacher putting himself in a room alone with a little girl is a recipe for very efficient life destruction. Sure the chances of little girl getting upset and making stuff up is low, but why in the hell would you ever take that risk when there's no reason to?

Personally if a girl is sub 18 and I don't intimately know the family or is close family I wouldn't want to be alone with them. Ever. As a man once you hit a certain age you get "call the police" looks for even smiling at a little girl who bumped into you in the grocery store in a rando encounter. Just is what it is.

Exactly.

 

[Etzer]

This is an Evangelical Christian thing. Someone should ask him what he thinks about women wearing pants.

 

[JustenP88]

JUST MOVE TO THE MIDDLE EAST, ASSHOLES. God damn, the Muslim hate is just jealousy because they're not allowed to run the country like a theocracy, isn't it?

 

[Vincent Grayson]

A male teacher putting himself in a room alone with a little girl is a recipe for very efficient life destruction. Sure the chances of little girl getting upset and making stuff up is low, but why in the hell would you ever take that risk when there's no reason to? My cousin is a teacher and his school actually has active protocol for this, telling male staff to call a female staff member into the room whenever they have to be put into a disciplinary role with girls.

Personally if a girl is sub 18 and I don't intimately know the family or is close family I wouldn't want to be alone with them. Ever. As a man once you hit a certain age you get "call the police" looks for even smiling at a little girl who bumped into you in the grocery store in a rando encounter. Just is what it is.

You guys live in a bizarre fucking world. While things like this happen, they do not happen frequently, and certainly not so much so that you need to structure your life around this fear.

I suggest maybe spending more time offline if you really think there's an epidemic of legitimate, upstanding men being accused of messing with young girls.

 

[Fallout-NL]

This is so ridiculous, btw. It's not like every time you eat dinner with someone of the opposite sex they're fellating a bottle, bending over and showing off their tits or shaking their ass in your face. You just get a boner by seeing another woman? Are you 12? Why is your equipment even coming into the conversation? Be an adult.

Don't put words into my mouth. I'm just saying that biology is indeed a thing (poor choice of words on my part in that post maybe). But when you're spending time with a man or a woman you find attractive, things can and sometimes do happen. No reason to become some kind of recluse that shuns all interaction for fear of infidelity, but it's not unheard of to at least not actively seek out spending time with people you find attractive. I just don't need the temptation I guess.

/edit: also what might cause some confusion is that it seems like I'm somehow defending Pence and his women hating / planet destroying ilk. Naturally, that is not the case. I am a feminist and a progressive minded person.

 

[BobNewbert31]

I ask this as a guy, why would I have to worry about eating food in the presence of a female colleague alone? And is this just isolated to consuming food around those of the opposite sex? Where is the fear coming from?

Again is it solely stemming from simply being "alone" physically or socially with someone of the opposite sex?

Because that doesn't seem like a benign issue.

She already explained why. Not saying it's Pence's reasoning, but for someone in the public eye, it's certainly not a bad reason.

The media loves to gossip and find scandal everywhere, and anything can be quickly taken out of context including a simple business lunch.

 

[FinaruDensetsu]

I dunno guys. Every time I'm at a meal with a woman or anywhere for that matter with a woman, my penis just falls into her. Neither of us can control it, that's just how the world works.

 

[chekhonte]

So this is like a thing now on the right.

http://thefederalist.com/2017/03/30/dont-mock-mike-pence-for-protecting-his-marriage-commend-him/

Like this is weird, is every interaction with a women/man a problem for these people. Can they not suppress their sex drive and interact with people, as you know, people?

Well conservative politicians that were vehemently against gay marriage seemed to have problems not boning young guys so maybe it is a thing.

 

[Vincent Grayson]

She already explained why. Not saying it's Pence's reasoning, but for someone in the public eye, it's certainly not a bad reason.

When is the last time a politician suffered because of the appearance of a scandal of this nature, without it turning out to be an actual affair/something else untoward?

 

[pa22word]

You guys live in a bizarre fucking world. While things like this happen, they do not happen frequently, and certainly not so much so that you need to structure your life around this fear.

I suggest maybe spending more time offline if you really think there's an epidemic of legitimate, upstanding men being accused of messing with young girls.

It has nothing to do with being terrified of some kind of epidemic of false accusations or whatever spin doctor shit you wanna throw out there and more to do with taking a bare minimum effort to displace any possibility of being put into a situation where you can have it happen, because if it does you are fucked. It doesn't really matter how small the odds are when the potential consequences are so immediately and totally devastating, and the effort taking to remove such risk is so miniscule that to not bother alleviating it is dumb.

Like, I'm not immediately terrified of ever being struck by lighting but you don't see people running around outside in the middle of a storm waving a metal pole around now do you?

 

[Derwind]

She already explained why. Not saying it's Pence's reasoning, but for someone in the public eye, it's certainly not a bad reason.

So because tabloids will tabloid, avoid being alone with women?

If we are being honest, that's not the real reason at all.

 

[Ac30]

This is a thing. My religious brother in law said he won't get in an elevator or similarly small space with a woman who isn't his wife (if it's just the two of them).

Bruh I don't know about you but when I see a beautiful woman in the same elevator as me I can't help but cheat on my fiancée, us men, y'know, we just give in to our desires. No self control! We're just animals, dumb men, excuse our infidelity please.

This is making the argument that men are impulsive idiots that need to be watched over by women to not do something stupid. Family values candidates amirite?

 

[Vincent Grayson]

It has nothing to do with being terrified of some kind of epidemic of false accusations or whatever spin doctor shit you wanna throw out there and more to do with taking a bare minimum effort to displace any possibility of being put into a situation where you can have it happen, because if it does you are fucked. It doesn't really matter how small the odds are when the potential consequences are so immediately and totally devastating, and the effort taking to remove such risk is so miniscule that to not bother alleviating it is dumb.

Like, I'm not immediately terrified of ever being struck by lighting but you don't see people running around outside in the middle of a storm waving a metal pole around now do you?

I don't think that's even remotely analogous, and that these fears are entirely overblown.

 

[Hobbestetrician]

worry about...the presence of a female colleague alone?

This boils down to the fact that if he cannot be alone with a female in any circumstance, he does not see them as colleagues. He won't meet with female Senators or Representatives and good luck getting a job on his staff or rising through the ranks.

This isn't about cheating on a spouse, it is about discrimination.

 

[Rockin' Ranger]

Bruh I don't know about you but when I see a beautiful woman in the same elevator as me I can't help but cheat on my fiancée, us men, y'know, we just give in to our desires. No self control! We're just animals, dumb men, excuse our infidelity please.

I doesn't help that women are nothing more than vile elevator seductresses, looking to bang any man they can get alone in a confined space for thirty seconds.

This boils down to the fact that if he cannot be alone with a female in any circumstance, he does not see them as colleagues. He won't meet with female Senators or Representatives and good luck getting a job on his staff or rising through the ranks.

This isn't about cheating on a spouse, it is about discrimination.

Yep, the attitude shows he can't see women as anything more than potential sex partners.

 

[jtb]

This bullshit is red meat for conservatives. "Oh society's shifting views are oppresing the white males." Who cares? Pence is a creep and can do whatever he wants. It's a loser.

 

[Byakuya769]

Pathetic.

He's probably cheated before.

 

[Earthbound64]

You guys live in a bizarre fucking world. While things like this happen, they do not happen frequently, and certainly not so much so that you need to structure your life around this fear

Except that it happened to me the first year that I was working with children.

 

[Breads]

Is the implication that we should only spend one on one time with people we would want to have sex with?

 

[Mechanized]

The only thing keeping Mike Pence's dick in his pants and preventing him from cheating is keeping distance from women. Ok.

 

[Bolivar687]

Not really a fan of the thread title. I can understand him not wanting to eat alone with a woman if he feels it's disrespectful to his wife, even if I think it's a little extreme. There's a Washington Post story about her today and she sounds like an amazing person, so I don't blame him for going above and beyond.

It gives the impression that they might have trust issues, though.

 

[Earthbound64]

Is the implication that we should only spend one on one time with people we would want to have sex with?

That's what some people think, yes.

 

[wordballoons]

man, wtf

 

[KarmaCow]

Of course someone who thinks this would be staunchly against abortion. All women are succubi tempting men so they can get abortions for fun later.

 

[Etzer]

Some of you are over complicating this. My mother goes to a (fanatical) Evangelical church. Women are simply not allowed to have 1 on 1 interactions with men who are not their husbands. That applies to interactions both inside and outside the church.

 

[Camjo-Z]

If you're such a horndog that you can't even enjoy a meal with another woman without trying to jump her bones then maybe don't get married?

 

[xxracerxx]

The men can't be friends with women folk are weird enough, this is a whole other level.

Grow up.

 

[Walshicus]

Matt Walsh is a raging homophobe.

No I'm not...

 

[BobNewbert31]

When is the last time a politician suffered because of the appearance of a scandal of this nature, without it turning out to be an actual affair/something else untoward?

You're right, I can't find any time accusations that proved false had a negative impact on the politician. I was just thinking of the hypothetical, I guess. The media is going to heavily scrutinize everything Pence does, rightfully so, and I just thought it wouldn't be insane to hedge against any possible accusations, not matter how outlandish.

If it's truly because he doesn't trust himself or women when around them 1 on 1, then that is certainly a major problem.

 

[pirateluigi]

This boils down to the fact that if he cannot be alone with a female in any circumstance, he does not see them as colleagues. He won't meet with female Senators or Representatives and good luck getting a job on his staff or rising through the ranks.

This isn't about cheating on a spouse, it is about discrimination.

This. This is exactly why I think this is a problem.

Even if his intentions are 100% pure, it equates to women will never be able to have the same interactions with him as men.

 

[gdt]

I don't see anything to be outraged about here. If that's how he wants to go about things and isn't hurting anyone what is the problem?

You don't think that affects how he perceives women or interacts with them?

 

[Poppy]

Some of you are over complicating this. My mother goes to a (fanatical) Evangelical church. Women are simply not allowed to have 1 on 1 interactions with men who are not their husbands. That applies to interactions both inside and outside the church.

no, the ones overcomplicating things are the people who impose that kind of dumbass regulation on themselves and others. it isnt overcomplicating things to think about all the red flags this administration has when it comes to the treatment of women and thinking that perhaps their behavior is rooted in flawed thinking, bigotry, ignorance, fear, malice etc.

i tend to hold those who control my country to a high standard of humanity.

 

[Byakuya769]

You don't think that affects how he perceives women or interacts with them?

And specifically puts women at a disadvantage compared to male peers than he will meet one on one with.

 

[Vincent Grayson]

Except that it happened to me the first year that I was working with children.

That doesn't make it statistically likely, or something others should live in fear of.

It sucks that it happened to you, but suggesting other people should be afraid of this at all times is like getting mugged and then trying to convince people never to go to the city again.

 

[Lyn]

I ask this as a guy, why would I have to worry about eating food in the presence of a female colleague alone? And is this just isolated to consuming food around those of the opposite sex? Where is the fear coming from?

Again is it solely stemming from simply being "alone" physically or socially with someone of the opposite sex?

Because that doesn't seem like a benign issue.

I certainly don't speak for others, but I believe it is more about avoiding temptation as a whole for either party, man or woman. This is not to say people are just going to lunge at each other and start having sex then and there on the table, but that the person doesn't even want to put themselves in a situation that could eventually lead to more. Having a third party along (of any sex) is less intimate of a setting though and more acceptable. Being a politician, it also helps to keep in mind the optics from others. People may not know it is a business dinner and look to push a scandal for some extra clicks on their website. This seems like a reasonable way to protect his family as well. Again though, I don't know his exact reasoning, but that would be my guess.

As for the rest, I guess it is up to the person in question. Someone earlier in the thread mentioned knowing someone who wouldn't even get into an elevator with women. I imagine that is a little more on the extreme side though. I would say for others it is about being alone in an intimate environment or venturing out with that one person.

I am just curious why this is such a bad thing though when myself and others do the same as women. Not all of us do of course, but I certainly have never been given any flack for being fairly conservative in regards to business/social outings. Personally it is less about temptation though and more about awareness of the situations I put myself in.

 

[Earthbound64]

That doesn't make it statistically likely, or something others should live in fear of.

It sucks that it happened to you, but suggesting other people should be afraid of this at all times is like getting mugged and then trying to convince people never to go to the city again.

Not sure what to tell you, than that the couple of men who work with children in this thread have indicated that this is the reality of the country that we live in.

 

[Keasar]

I feel a bit worried reading this that the Vice President seems pretty sure that he would sexually ravage any woman he was left alone with...

And that there are many people like that.

Some of you are over complicating this. My mother goes to a (fanatical) Evangelical church. Women are simply not allowed to have 1 on 1 interactions with men who are not their husbands. That applies to interactions both inside and outside the church.

Suddenly a compilation of memories flashed through my head of right-wing Christian people talking about how badly Islam treat women.

 

[levious]

No I'm not...

#notallmatts