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[JP]

I'm not sure how linking him to a thread which is essentially dead will help him all that much. Nobody has posted there in nearly 2 months and the community that formed around that thread moved on.

Him venting here means at least a few people see it and maybe able to help.

Lets not turn this thread into something that it isn't but I did mention reasons and I've not suggest and never would suggest that there is anything wrong with this thread.

The threads also contains contemporary contact information for support groups and websites across much of the globe that may well be of benefit for some people, even it's of no help to how depression affects your daily life. Information like that has certainly kept me alive since I was diagnosed with severe clinical depression when I was eleven and if there is the absolute slightest of chances that the information it it may assist any other people at all then it certainly does have value.

There's some really good database of information, contact numbers, websites, etc at the start of that thread and the one that proceeded it which is also linked to in the thread and if somebody finds that is of no use to them, then no harm had been done as reading the information on there doesn't prevent people from posting and communicating in this or other threads.

 

[Dai Kaiju]

Prayer.

 

[dagZ]

This snowy weather does not help either.

 

[-Minsc-]

This snowy weather does not help either.

This tells me it's time to find some cool things to do which can only be done in snowy weather. Seek out that silver lining.

No more zero days

Thanks for the reminder. There are certain things I need to get done thanks to zero days in those areas. Even if on the worst days I just scratched off one tiny item on the list then I'd still be ahead. Though I don't quite agree with absolutely no zero days. Some times life throws in things that are way more important.

 

[///PATRIOT]

Yes I am. It's been a bitch to live with, but I am managing it day by day.

Glad to read that, hugs to you and op

 

[Martinski43]

Dealing it with the best way possible of course.

Pills and alcohol.

Spoiler

/s

 

[Blam]

Glad to read that, hugs to you and op

Thanks man. Just an update I have been feeling better, after some suggestions by a few friends whom have also been through depression.

So it's a start to the end of my depression. I hope.

 

[Lord Thrappleper The 49th]

Man I just went through a spiral of depression this weekend, pretty bad. But I kept focused to try and overcome it.

Basically at the beginning of the week I got snowed in and couldnt go to work. Thursday I forgot that I had prebooked to see star wars with my friends and so now couldnt see it. Friday I had a meeting to explain why I couldnt get to work on tuesday and I got fired. Came home that night and my boiler broke and couldnt heat my house up.
Then my dog shredded up some important letters.

At least I have a job interview tomorrow and a trial shift starting on wednesday.

 

[golfham]

I’ve taken an SSRI for 6 months now and it’s changed my life. I feel normal now.

 

[megatronium]

Spirituality and AA. Then bootstraps.

 

[BANGS]

A solid balance of bootstraps and escapism...

edit: But to clarify this is how I deal with being depressed. I don't actually have "depression"...

 

[Ptaaty]

Exercise. Small project or work that has tangible result you can see.

 

[dagZ]

how do you fight off the deep, intense overwhelming sad moments that come on? I've noticed me breaking down recently. Mostly because of my breakup, but I feel like my life is at a stand still at the moment.

 

[ThatStupidLion]

how do you fight off the deep, intense overwhelming sad moments that come on? I've noticed me breaking down recently. Mostly because of my breakup, but I feel like my life is at a stand still at the moment.

Personally and proabably unhealthily i try to just hold out until it ends, i know ive not been depressed before and that this wave of it will fade eventually. So i guess i mentally just try to beat it and coach myself through. Also, ive come to terms with myself just living an avg life without the ambition i used to have and just a guy who takes life 1 day at a time till i die. A lot of my depression is existential.

Ive only self diagnosed myself, and from what it seems its mild. So not sure how much it helps you.

 

[Kadayi]

It's very easy to get caught in a state of inertia when you are depressed because everything seems overwhelming In my experience to overcome that you need to set down a few daily tasks to carry out (pen and notepad are all you need to start), that you can tick off. The more you do, the more they become habits and the more you are able to take on as time progresses.

Tasks don't need to be complicated. Do the washing up, have a shave, water the plants. Read a chapter of a book. Go for a ten-minute walk, etc. A simple one that's a good starter is just making your bed in the morning. Get up straighten the pillows, etc.

Treat complicated challenges as projects, and therefore break them down into stages which can be managed as sequenced tasks over a period of time.

Also factor in leeway. If you have 6 tasks on your list and you achieve 5, that's a win. All 6 is a bonus. Tasks not completed, move to the next day, or when next convenient.

Another thing to consider is sleep cycles. The average sleep cycle is around 90 minutes and ideally, you want 4-5 sleep cycles a night. getting woken up midway through a sleep cycle by an alarm is the worst. You will feel perpetually tired most of the day. If you need to get up at 6 am, for instance, you need to head to bed before 10.30 to get 5 cycles in. Avoid any device screens when you go to bed because blue light keeps you awake, similarly if you have any light sources in your bedroom, or outside (like street lamps for instance) I recommend getting a decent sleep eye mask to block it out.

 

[Helen Keller the Musical]

sleep

This

Sleep plus exercise, very good for clearing your head and rethinking my problems.

It also helps me to simplify my diet and eat more fresh cooking and way less eating out / fried or sugary stuff.

 

[dagZ]

I had a backwards progress day today.. I used a sick day, and just slept all day. I tried to text her, but I think she blocked me. It's so odd how someone can block you. How someone can go from being obsessed with you and wanted to talk all day, to you becoming a stranger. I know deep down we aren't right for each other, she would always get very jealous, when I never gave her a reason to. I loved her and would never do anything unfaithful, or even think of it. She was always mean towards me also, and I couldn't completely open up myself to her because of that. I know i'm not perfect either, and I had little things I needed to work on, like being more appreciative and more affectionate, but my god I loved her. My issues I could work on, and I told her I was working on them, but she left me because I kept making the same small mistakes.

 

[dagZ]

this year I secretly blocked the ability for people to post on my facebook page because a few days before it, we got into a fight about girls posting to my page saying happy birthday.. I havent used my facebook in over 4 years. It was stuff like that. I felt like I was always on watch for something I've never done. Maybe once a day, something about another girl would come up. Like "are you texting another girl" or If I was out to lunch for work, "it would be are you on a date with a girl?" She's older than me by 6 years, she's 32. and I thought the immature stuff would stop. I wish I could get over it. She was really pretty, and I guess i'm being petty and shallow and can't get over that.

 

[Pomerlaw]

i'm struggling right now

1) Seek professionnal help
2) Exercice
3) Go outside, in nature.

 

[dagZ]

I hope everyone has had a happy holidays, were all in this together.

 

[Brofist]

People are giving bootstraps as legit advice?

 

[GodOfVG103]

OP start taking more action in your life and stop feeling sorry for yourself.

The time you spend crying about your ex you will regret because you could have used that time to do things you might enjoy or meet someone better.

The hurt and pain is going to be there for a while but the more you sit back and obsess over her, the longer it will take for you to move on.

Alot of guys get super depressed and broken when they get dumped or break up because deep down they knew it wasn’t the right situation and now they have to face that fear of having to move on and start over again with someone who might actually be better, which is hard because that would mean they have to become better also.

Summary: start creating a life for yourself that you actually enjoy so when someone else decides to walk out of your life you won’t feel like your life is over.

 

[billythemule]

My depression got better when I started working more and exercising. It didn't make things 100% but it made me more stable. I don't have terrible mood swings anymore and I actually have a little bit of money that I can spend on myself. I recommend having something to do. I function best in environments where I am forced to get off my ass. Going to the gym doesn't really work for me because it's so easy to skip a day when I don't feel like going. I do karate and there is a certain degree of pressure to not miss a class because of belt gradings. You also got to impress your teachers and stay in shape. It's a group sport and that is perfect for me. Same thing with work. I can't skip work when I feel like it because then I'll just be fired.

Don't be afraid to seek professional help. I was on medication for many years. I don't particularly like meds but they work as a band aid and help you get going. I don't take them anymore, although I sometimes want to jump on them again.

 

[CampbellzSoup]

Stop giving a fuck about things that don’t concern you.

Find things that make you happy, and don’t get dragged into a hole that makes you sad.

 

[Pomerlaw]

I will repeat myself but don't underestimate the power of going outside, doing something in nature. I'm sure there is a small forest, or a lake, or a calm place somewhere near you where you can just walk around and be quiet. If you live in a big city there must be someone who would be ready to drive you to the nearest park and walk/run with you.

Snow and cold ; you just need to dress up correctly. I love winter it is calm, it rests the spirit, and it is beautiful.

Please turn off the computer/phone.

https://www.theguardian.com/society...re-reduces-depression-obesity-european-report

 

[CampbellzSoup]

Go in vacation too we try to do 3:4 budget cruises a year it makes you look forward to something in the year

 

[dagZ]

OP start taking more action in your life and stop feeling sorry for yourself.

The time you spend crying about your ex you will regret because you could have used that time to do things you might enjoy or meet someone better.

The hurt and pain is going to be there for a while but the more you sit back and obsess over her, the longer it will take for you to move on.

Alot of guys get super depressed and broken when they get dumped or break up because deep down they knew it wasn’t the right situation and now they have to face that fear of having to move on and start over again with someone who might actually be better, which is hard because that would mean they have to become better also.

Summary: start creating a life for yourself that you actually enjoy so when someone else decides to walk out of your life you won’t feel like your life is over.

I totally understand this, and I don't disagree at all. I don't think I'm a bad person by any means, and I totally want to improve my life. I feel I can be more affectionate, and more caring, but it's odd, do you think that sometimes there could be something wrong with you medically, or just in your head? Like I need a push of something/someone to help me out.

 

[dagZ]

My depression got better when I started working more and exercising. It didn't make things 100% but it made me more stable. I don't have terrible mood swings anymore and I actually have a little bit of money that I can spend on myself. I recommend having something to do. I function best in environments where I am forced to get off my ass. Going to the gym doesn't really work for me because it's so easy to skip a day when I don't feel like going. I do karate and there is a certain degree of pressure to not miss a class because of belt gradings. You also got to impress your teachers and stay in shape. It's a group sport and that is perfect for me. Same thing with work. I can't skip work when I feel like it because then I'll just be fired.

Don't be afraid to seek professional help. I was on medication for many years. I don't particularly like meds but they work as a band aid and help you get going. I don't take them anymore, although I sometimes want to jump on them again.

I think I really do need to start working out. I am very skinny, and out of shape. Maybe I will join a kickboxing class or something.

 

[Chilli_Axe]

Very poorly haha - I usually swing between feeling great to fine for a few days and contemplate suicide for the next couple of days, then the cycle repeats itself

 

[Randomizer]

Medication mostly. Attempted therapy but it just never helped. After a few mental breakdowns last month the mental health services in my area are starting to take my case more serious. Don't want to get my hopes up but i'm slightly more positive than usual.

 

[MrToast]

With the knowledge that Trump will either be impeached soon, or worse case scenario, his reign of terrorism will end in 2020.

 

[Blam]

Medication mostly. Attempted therapy but it just never helped. After a few mental breakdowns last month the mental health services in my area are starting to take my case more serious. Don't want to get my hopes up but i'm slightly more positive than usual.

Glad to hear that yours can help your situation unlike mine.

 

[Catphish]

Before leaping into a pile of pills, I would recommend listening to some speeches from the Dalai Lama, or modern-day Jim Carrey.

Our culture is 95% bullshit, and you are 100% beautiful.

Life is transient, and death is not to be feared.

You came from the Infinite Divine, you presently exist in the Infinite Divine, and to the Infinite Divine you will one day return.

Allow your sadness, but observe it, detached; don't succumb to it. Easier said than done, of course, but practice makes perfect.

You are not a human being with consciousness. You are consciousness with a human being.

All is as it must be. You'll be ok. ❤

 

[shpankey]

I think I really do need to start working out. I am very skinny, and out of shape. Maybe I will join a kickboxing class or something.

This kind of stuff works wonders on multiple levels, including self-image. Kudos.

 

[chixdiggit]

I think I really do need to start working out. I am very skinny, and out of shape. Maybe I will join a kickboxing class or something.

YES! Martial Arts has saved my life and I now teach it. Just make sure you stick with it and show up even if you don't feel like it. You will always feel better after.

 

[dagZ]

YES! Martial Arts has saved my life and I now teach it. Just make sure you stick with it and show up even if you don't feel like it. You will always feel better after.

That will be my biggest thing. I am very bad at sticking with stuff, but I really want to. I get down on myself because I don't keep going with stuff. I need to work on my self-health.

 

[cryptic]

By taking on.more and more distraction. By isolating.
By finding myself struggling indefinitely without any hope to find the slightest glimmer of it.
To finding and losing connections.
To watching my body age and rot under the pressures, by feeling an accomplishment in frugality, which is to say deprivation.
To being very delicately balanced.
Dependent upon routine.
To feeling myself further and further distanced from that which I sought to become- everyone else- by the very necessity of who I've had to become at the loss of my self.
I can't find my reference point, my relation in anyone else.
It's hard to feel criticism for the shortcomings I once raised to high esteem when I can't relate to the precedents set by everyone else.
I want to be like everyone else, but I'll never be able to.
My depression has completely changed my reality and it's allowed me to cope.
It's a total sacrifice.

 

[Darko]

Being blazed 24/7 helps... about to become legal here too.

 

[dagZ]

I feel like i'm doing better then all of a sudden, i see someone that reminds me and my heart collapses in..

 

[CampbellzSoup]

Being blazed 24/7 helps... about to become legal here too.

Don’t do this OP

 

[ZoltanXerxes]

One good piece of advice I heard in addition to medication (if you require it) is to always keep a full plate, i.e keep yourself busy with lots of stuff.

The analogy goes like this: I’m going to eat dinner and on my plate I have turkey, mashed potatoes, scallops, bread and corn. I’m not a big fan of corn, but I love the other stuff. Even though I hate corn it only fills a small part of my plate so it doesn’t bother me that much because I enjoy the other stuff.

If I keep myself doing stuff like going for a walk, reading a book, playing a game, learning a language or skill and something happens that depresses me, it won’t affect me as much because I have so much other stuff going on that I may not even care.

I realize that clinical depression require medication and counseling but in addition to those, if you have a full plate, it will help on not dwelling on the depression itself.

 

[dagZ]

Don’t do this OP

ha, I don't smoke. it's not for everyone.

 

[dagZ]

One good piece of advice I heard in addition to medication (if you require it) is to always keep a full plate, i.e keep yourself busy with lots of stuff.

The analogy goes like this: I’m going to eat dinner and on my plate I have turkey, mashed potatoes, scallops, bread and corn. I’m not a big fan of corn, but I love the other stuff. Even though I hate corn it only fills a small part of my plate so it doesn’t bother me that much because I enjoy the other stuff.

If I keep myself doing stuff like going for a walk, reading a book, playing a game, learning a language or skill and something happens that depresses me, it won’t affect me as much because I have so much other stuff going on that I may not even care.

I realize that clinical depression require medication and counseling but in addition to those, if you have a full plate, it will help on not dwelling on the depression itself.

This is a good strategy, I just need to start those activities. it's hard because all i want to do after work is just go sleep.

 

[Shmuppers]

Exercise. Better than meds, better than therapy. It sounds like you're hung up over this girl. She was insane, and you dodged a bullet.

 

[all of my hate]

Alcohol & music.

 

[Shmuppers]

Alcohol & music.

I'm sure this poster meant well but falling into the trap of drinking to feel better can only lead downward. Exercise will help improve your confidence and alleviate stress, while not destroying your body

 

[all of my hate]

I'm sure this poster meant well but falling into the trap of drinking to feel better can only lead downward.

Trust me, I know.

 

[Alebrije]

Get a hobby , something that you never have done before. keep your brain busy.

 

[shpankey]

Drinking, definitely a NO-NO! It has a short term gain for a long term loss. Think of it this way, you are borrowing on credit some "feel good", but like all loans, the payback will be for more than you are borrowing. If you can afford that, then good for you, drinking can be fun. But if you are fighting depression, trust me, you can't afford it.

Music I do agree with though, that can be tremendous and is free feel good. Just stick with happy/uplifting music if you can, though sad songs can help too in some cases. A good cry can really move along recovery sometimes.

 

[Sosokrates]

Ive heard deficient or insufficient hormone levels can cause depression.