It looks childish because people are discussing it sensibly, and then when you post something like that it sticks out. Contextually, you could be said to be starting trouble in this thread and the developers (mods) should remove you for it. That's the stance you're taking. I think you're an idealist - I don't really have a problem with this but like most things it's a very airy fairy top down 'fix' to a problem, that won't work.
First, let's leave gender out of this because it's a distraction ok. Let's talk about how you appear to see things
- First, you see impolite verbal exchanges as harassment or not nice? And developers (or unknown entity) should police this environment to make sure this doesn't happen. There is this free, happy place where everyone treats each other well and gives each other support or encouragement.
- Second, you are only viewing one narrowly focused view of what 'harassment' is. To be honest, you are coming across as somewhat naive and inexperienced from the days of community servers. Public speaking was never really a thing on PC's. You had Vent and TS2 etc. Now there is discord. Mostly it was press 'y' or 't' to speak in general or team. Harassment back then was strafe blocking snipers to steal their weapon, flash banging your own team, offensive sprays, ramming people off the track, team killing, ganking, corpse camping, glitching, aimbots etc. All these things eventually causing people to leave servers or logout and return later.
I get what you're saying and I even think it's commendable but it's not realistic. Also, you're not taking into account those people who enjoy that aspect of the game. Some people like 'trash talking'. It elevates the wins and enforces rivalry. Some people like to give people on their team a kick up the ass if they are flagging or costing the team a victory. This happens in real sports as well. Take a night out with friends, we'll play pool and wind each other up something rotten but it's in good spirits. People get pissed off while they're playing and shout/get frustrated but when the game's over it's over.
So let's take a game with long standing mates, let's just say generic FPS 101. So an exchange might be
'Boom, headhsot'
'Shurrup nobhead'
'Why you mad bro?'
'Oh just fuck off. I'm gonna fucking hunt you down and teabag you, you twat'
How do you quantify that?
The onus is on the developer to give tools to players to easily mute and remove obnoxious players on voice chat, and to design games where the old methods of trolling have penalties. You are going to enter games where people are vastly different to you and want different things from the game. If you are in battlefield and you have someone who wants to be the first placed squad and you're dicking about on a hill with a sniper rifle on a CQC map then you will be called out, and probably not very nicely. Similarly, if you're playing FIFA, trailing one nil, couple of minutes left and you're passing between centrebacks expect a 'Orange, what the fuck are you doing. Hit it forward.'
That's what people are saying to you. And you're not acknowledging it.