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NeoGAF's Poetry Corner - #76: Finality

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Theme: "Finality"

The fact of being an irreversible ending, or something that is complete, conclusive -- final.


Optional Secondary Objective: Ekphrasis

Text that in some way comments upon another art form. Use a painting, a film, a song, a game, etc.


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Submission Deadline:
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Voting Deadline:
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* FAQ
* Previous Challenges
 

vdlow

Member
vltra

For eternity
[As if we knew what it means]
For the life
[Surrounded with our sins]
The walk of a day
...
The abrupt end
But it's ok

After thousand of falls
There's a last one
The final
The one

The question
A matter of why
[I just can't understand]
Just let go of your pride
Give me your hand

For the sake of our savior
Go
So the sins of the beginning
Are forgiven
[it's the end]
 
Elegy for Al and the Hoopleheads

I never saw you
until you were dead,

ramrod man in gray underwear
ruling from a filthy throne

until progress snatched the crown. Big
oil, big money, profit cancels everything

beautiful. But you were never beautiful,
with 3,000 fucks and the bodies of whores

and everything mud flung on torn suits. Al,
you made every step a fucking adventure. Al, I came

too late to save you, but I’m still hoping
you’ll tell me something pretty at last.


Obviously Al didn't die on Deadwood, but the show is "dead." Anyway, that's my inspiration for the secondary.
 

crops55

Member
What will Death become
when the whole of life stirs in the dust?

--when there is no one left to look both ways,
no more sweaty palms or anxious laughter,
no more violins to sing of Death so sweetly.

Who or what will bargain such esteem
for the truth Death tends?

All that time spent waiting,
knocking on the door,
then waiting again,
only to be met by the cradling arms of a ceaseless slumber.
 
lol, its just my real name. Probably not the most pragmatic decision I made, what with the NSA spying and all. It means "to mark/write" in my native tongue.

Well, that's a fucking righteous name to have, then. I just really like the way it flows and looks with the extra initial appended. Always have. Never assumed it was actually your name. I'm always surprised by that (and by how many people have done it).

Cyan, I honestly cannot remember why I chose this specific username. I even went back and searched my own posting history. I have a lot of monkey-themed usernames across these our internets, ever since I opened my gmail account so many years ago and in a fit of noninspiration, chose "legendarymonkey" because there was an infomercial about some Monkees CD set on TV in the other room and I thought "legendary monkey (Monkee)" was a hilarious phrase. So if I had to guess, I probably picked this variation because my bff often addresses me with the phrase "hey, monkey."

and that's the end of that story.
 

FelixOrion

Poet Centuriate
(Got a medical procedure to do and I'm gonna be drugged up like hell next couple of days so posting now)

Sword Through the Back

A thread of white light tainted red
As the steel slips through rib
Time has stopped
But the numbers keep counting
Stepping further into the abyss
Delaying the promised end
To this Fantasy
 
Vastness
Emptiness
Stretching on
Look out to sea, look into the sky
They are the same
I come from both
And in the end, I will return to both
But for now, I'm happy to be here
With you
 

Cyan

Banned
After the End

The music washes over, through him
A wave that leaves no mark
Empty bass-drops
Sullen chords
Voice without a soul

He perches at the bar and watches
A woman in a red dress dance
Hollow laughter
Pointless movement
Puppet on a string

He downs another tasteless shot
The faces leer, distorted
Masks of people
Momentary veils
Fickle illusions

All things once felt are gone
All paths once walked, obscured
All connection lost

He knows it's not forever
But deep inside, a thread is cut
Leaving only numbness

Where once was lush green life
 

Ashes

Banned
it.

When it knocked,
I doubted its veracity,
though not with much temerity.

I saw a cyclist down on the pavement tonight;
I slowed down to see what the fuss was,
and there he was, straight like in a coffin,
the officer beside him, calm but shaking,
I idled my engine, but he nodded, and waved me to pass.

And it knocked again,
that friend,
waiting by the window,
in the cold rain.

I recalled my first accident, he hit me in the back,
from the side, causing me to spin.
I remember losing control of the car,
braking, breaking, bracing.
He cared more about the insurance,
and that shocked me; he refused to call the police,
and grinned at his friend, thinking presumably, that
he'd got me.

There it is again,
the black dogs are howling,
lightening screaming, thunder braying,
the trees are prostrating, the deer are fleeing,
the river floods the meadows.

It sits on the tip of the moor,
I can see it, riding atop
a black gelded colt, shotgun in hand;
he is my murderer, and I have
seen him coming.
 
Like a gaping mouth, the wound shifts with every breath
pulled raggedly from tired lungs, that bubble and wheeze
as blood seeps from exposed depths to pool beneath the dying wreck,
the twisted, broken frame of what once was man,
but now is little more than a bundle of mangled flesh and bone,
bleeding out in the baking sun, the contorted remains
that, even now, still quiver in pain. A moan escapes,
as mashed lips feebly attempt to form words that god only knows,
yet their message is clear, all the same.
Afraid and alone, blood flecked and trampled,
dying slowly, painfully, beneath these bright and sunny skies,
that belie the carnage wrought below, the fields of horror,
painted viscera red, the trails of carnage and crushed bone.
He begs for death, in the end, but when the last breath comes,
that halting, incomplete intake, the sudden shudders
that pull and twist his form, making these final moments
ones of an agony indescribable. The pain is searing and white,
but as it fades, as he feels his body and mind slowly slip away,
all that remains is the deep, overwhelming blackness,
as death silently takes his fill.
 
I keep almost posting and then I change my votes. Argh.

Okay, after much deliberation:

1. Cyan
2. FelixOrion
3. videtonator
HM: Ashes, Bootaaay, both of which I liked, but were a little too prosey for me.

Next time we need a real uplifting theme, like, I don't know, cotton candy or ponies.
 

vdlow

Member
1- Felix (serious, this was one of the best entries ever)
2- Like the hat?
3- Ashes

Pretty solid entries again, everyone else deserves a HM.
 
1.) Like the hat? - On the Cape
2.) FelixOrion - Sword Through the Back (major kudos on the secondary)
3.) Cyan - After the End

HM: Ashes - it; kaepernickehs - Finality - A bunch of teeth
 
Weird that some of the regulars didn't vote, right? Did I mess up the times?

This is my count:

FelixOrion 7
Cyan 6
Ashes 6
Like the Hat? 5
videtonator 3
hey_monkey 3

/fireworks
 
I looked at the old ones! It was two days! But if it's usually Monday, we can adjust (though Felix might kill us all).

eta: LET'S VOTE ON VOTING
 

Cyan

Banned
I looked at the old ones! It was two days! But if it's usually Monday, we can adjust (though Felix might kill us all).

eta: LET'S VOTE ON VOTING

Oh, was it really? Maybe I'm getting confused with the writing challenge threads, which have voting going to Monday.

:?

Anyway, it was in the OP and all, I don't have a big problem with calling it for Felix.
 

FelixOrion

Poet Centuriate
Oh, damn.

Yeah, usually the voting deadline is Monday.

Oh, was it really? Maybe I'm getting confused with the writing challenge threads, which have voting going to Monday.

:?

Anyway, it was in the OP and all, I don't have a big problem with calling it for Felix.

Actually I think the poetry thread has always (supposed to have) ended on Sunday nights.

YAY FELIXORION!

Oh boy! I'll start thinking of a theme today. It'll give me something good to do while I recover, lol
 

Ashes

Banned
We were a lot more lax in the poetry threads, but its good that we're not anymore. It has been monday night as Cyan said, but op rules etc... congrats Felix.
 
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