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[Riggs]

You can't say that! Mewling quim is acceptable though.

Sounds like a bunch of knob heads makin the rules!

 

[Ultima_5]

Curb Your Enthusiasm - The C Word.

NSFW language and what not

 

[Mumei]

There is not a blanket ban on the word "bitch." There are, however, ways you can use "bitch" which could get you banned. Opiate recently addressed questions about this in another thread:

Is it contextual or zero-tolerance?

It's going to be hard not saying the b-word.

Definitely contextual, always. For example, I just said all four of those words, and you'll notice I'm not banned! Generally speaking, regarding the word "bitch," if the word is clearly not intended to apply in a gender sensitive way -- if you use it as a synonym for "asshole" or "jerk" -- it will be fine.

But other uses are not fine. If you are applying it to a woman in a situation that might be even remotely gender-specific, be careful. Also, applying it to a man in such a way that you intend to emasculate them, or imply they are weak or pathetic, is also not appropriate. So, "stop being a bitch" is not appropriate, for example.

Context will always matter. While sometimes people are not moderated simply because we don't see the post (it happens), many times people complain that [Poster X] was banned for saying a bad word, but [Poster Y] was not, and people think this is unfair. As you say, however, context matters -- the same exact words can mean very different things coming from different people at different times.

This makes the rules harder to follow, I realize this. They are not hard, fast, simple rules. We are relying on your ability to be reasonable and mature, and in almost all cases you'll be fine if you do.

Again, feel free to send me PMs if you need. Thanks.

I want to be clear, however, in stating that using it as a synonym for "asshole" or "jerk" is still unacceptable when used towards another poster; it is something in practice that is available more for self-deprecation or towards a task (e.g. "This level was a bitch to get through") that is not directed towards another person.

Nearly all rules about language here are contextual. There is no list of words that you are not allowed to post; any word in the right context or in the right discussion can be acceptable. But there are words that have a heightened scrutiny around their usage, such as gendered or racist or homophobic slurs.

 

[Venfayth]

Ooh, one of my friends used to be really fond of calling people "chodes". I think that means you have a wide penis, right?

 

[Souther]

No it's not. Do you know what a douche is?

Yes. But the majority of people associate "Douchebag" more with Women than they do with the medical use.

Anything else devolution

 

[Seanspeed]

The words you choose to insult people with says something about you, regardless of how much people like to deny it.

Everything we do says something about us. All you're pointing out is another criteria by which to judge people with.

Personally, I'll use the word if its warranted and nobody is gonna make me feel bad for doing it. If somebody is the least bit intelligent, they should have a pretty good idea of when it is and isn't appropriate.

 

[Gorillaz]

What? Really? The Breaking Bad thread will soon be a wasteland if that's truly the case.

Most of the people know that it's only a joke because the main character calls every guy in the world a B. Hopefully people realize that it's a joke because it has never been used in an offensive way on the show.

 

[StuBurns]

Ooh, one of my friends used to be really fond of calling people "chodes". I think that means you have a wide penis, right?

Short and wide I believe.

 

[cubicle47b]

And here I thought the victim got to determine whether or not something aimed at them was a slur, not someone outside the group it was aimed it.

Are you a straight white male? If you are, then nope. (no, I'm not whining)

 

[MThanded]

This makes the rules harder to follow, I realize this. They are not hard, fast, simple rules. We are relying on your ability to be reasonable and mature, and in almost all cases you'll be fine if you do.

This sums up a lot of how not to get banned on GAF.

 

[Dead Man]

Well no not really, mostly used by women.

Technically yes, but when people use it as an isult, what do you think they mean?

Yes, wikipedia, I know:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Douche

A douche /ˈduːʃ/ is a device used to introduce a stream of water into the body for medical or hygienic reasons, or the stream of water itself.

Douche usually refers to vaginal irrigation, the rinsing of the vagina, but it can also refer to the rinsing of any body cavity. A douche bag is a piece of equipment for douching—a bag for holding the fluid used in douching. To avoid transferring intestinal bacteria into the vagina, the same bag must not be used for an enema and a vaginal douche.

 

[Riggs]

Not even sure what that means. Going to assume it's a really extremely oversized penis.

It's kind of like a barmy billy no-mates whois been kicked in the bollocks a few to many times. This list of British curse words is really awesome !

 

[Xun]

What a bitch, eh?

 

[notworksafe]

Are you a straight white male? If you are, then nope. (no, I'm not whining)

So if he was a gay black male it'd be bad to call him a manchild or dick...but not if he's a white straight person?

 

[Divvy]

Technically yes, but when people use it as an isult, what do you think they mean?

Yes, wikipedia, I know:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Douche

Well I've always known it as just a shortened version of douchebag and this urbandictionary entry sums it up:

"An individual who has an over-inflated sense of self worth, compounded by a low level of intellegence, behaving ridiculously in front of colleagues with no sense of how moronic he appears."

I don't really know what that has to do with anything feminine at all and usually it's thrown at men.

 

[Atrus]

Nope. Only if you don't know the impact of gendered pejoratives and think the male equivalents are the same.




No it's not. Do you know what a douche is?

Syntactically, both male and female pejoratives are equivalent forms of insult. Both would have to be banned for logical consistency. Anything short is a sort of special pleading, that we have to be unequal for the sake of special interests.

Douchebag itself is a pejorative stemming primarily from use of the equipment to douche a vagina as was more commonly practiced in the past, where such terms would have had more weight than now where the practice is in disuse. Even though the object itself can have uses by both genders, the insult is categorically in the same vein as pejoratives that use anything feminine as an insult:

Panties in a twist.
Sand in your vagina.

 

[WanderingWind]

This sums up a lot of how not to get banned on GAF.

Largely, maturity is confused with "clinical" by some, which is in itself, a fairly immature way of viewing things. Stay clinical and you'll be fine here.

 

[Eidan]

So if he was a gay black male it'd be bad to call him a manchild or dick...but not if he's a white straight person?

If he was a black male calling him "boy" would be a racial slur, but it wouldn't be if he was white. Mind blown?

 

[cubicle47b]

So if he was a gay black male it'd be bad to call him a manchild or dick...but not if he's a white straight person?

No, you can always used gendered insults against men (well, gendered insults that are derogatory to men). You can just also call white guys crackers (they won't care).

 

[mantidor]

I don't think bitchy has anything to do with promiscuity. At least I've never heard it used that way.

I was under the impression that the origin of the word meant to imply the person was a female dog.

I know the literal meaning, I'm talking more about use, then again, I'm no expert.

Pretty sure the word "gay" used to mean happy and it's only been in recent times that it has been used as another word for homosexual.

Again, use, it turned into an insult, which is what makes it homophobic, even if is not used for specific homosexual things, is used to describe dumb or uncool things.

Is all in the use, and bitch has an awful connotation as far as I know, is not like you could change it for "retard" and the insult would be the same.

 

[andymcc]

is this going to turn into reddit's men's rights shit or something

 

[blame space]

here's an old this american life episode about sissies
http://www.thisamericanlife.org/radio-archives/episode/46/sissies

pretty good listen. basically calling a man a bitch is calling him a sissy.

 

[Vermillion]

Yes but we're talking gender specific slurs. Just as race and sexual orientation slurs are used to make people feel shitty for the same reasons.

No, I get you. Just pointing that out.

 

[StealthGoblin]

I use all of my insulting language on people regardless of their sex, sexual orientation and ethnicity. I don't have a set of insults for women and other set for men.

Hate everyone equally yo.

 

[notworksafe]

If he was a black male calling him "boy" would be a racial slur, but it wouldn't be if he was white. Mind blown?

Racial slurs aren't being discussed. Both black and white men are equal targets of gendered slurs.

No, you can always used gendered insults against men (well, gendered insults that are derogatory to men). You can just also call white guys crackers (they won't care).

Sweet double standard.

 

[Souther]

No, you can always used gendered insults against men (well, gendered insults that are derogatory to men). You can just also call white guys crackers (they won't care).

WHAT THE EFF DID YOU JUST CALL ME!!!

 

[usea]

There is not a blanket ban on the word "bitch." There are, however, ways you can use "bitch" which could get you banned. Opiate recently addressed questions about this in another thread:



I want to be clear, however, in stating that using it as a synonym for "asshole" or "jerk" is still unacceptable when used towards another poster; it is something in practice that is available more for self-deprecation or towards a task (e.g. "This level was a bitch to get through") that is not directed towards another person.

Nearly all rules about language here are contextual. There is no list of words that you are not allowed to post; any word in the right context or in the right discussion can be acceptable. But there are words that have a heightened scrutiny around their usage, such as gendered or racist or homophobic slurs.

In summary, you can express an identical thought with different words and be OK. So really certain words that certain mods have rallied against are not OK in certain contexts. But the thoughts being expressed are irrelevant.

For example, I can't say that you're being a little bitch about certain words, and I can't say that people shouldn't bitch about their variety of insults being limited. However, I can express those same ideas with different language.

Also, cunt.

 

[Riggs]

WHAT THE EFF DID YOU JUST CALL ME!!!

Shut it sissy!!

 

[Malvolio]

I only get lippy when I'm driving. From behind the wheel of my perfectly driven vehicle all people I find offensive are labeled twats. I also prefer to pronounce the "a" like "vat" not "watt".

 

[Tookay]

My problem with all of this stems from the fact that GAF is a pretty liberal/progressive place. I don't really think these groups, while still minorities, are nearly as ostracized or in need of protection as the moderation thinks, at least on this site. People seem to be pretty open here about all sorts of viewpoints/lifestyles, and it's accomplished mostly through methods other than intimidation.

It feels unnecessary, bordering on white-knighting to me. Yes, words have power, but it feels like outright banning them gives them more of it, and ignores the fact that they have the power to change over time. Some of the uses I've seen for gendered words on this site and their subsequent bans don't even seem to be cases where they were used as slurs against any group in particular, but just generalized insults, as these words sometimes have transformed into.

 

[Dead Man]

Well I've always known it as just a shortened version of douchebag and this urbandictionary entry sums it up:

"An individual who has an over-inflated sense of self worth, compounded by a low level of intellegence, behaving ridiculously in front of colleagues with no sense of how moronic he appears."

I don't really know what that has to do with anything feminine at all and usually it's thrown at men.

Urban dictionary is probably not the best resource to understand the origins of pejoratives. Atrus already made a good post about it, so I'll just quote that:

Syntactically, both male and female pejoratives are equivalent forms of insult. Both would have to be banned for logical consistency. Anything short is a sort of special pleading, that we have to be unequal for the sake of special interests.

Douchebag itself is a pejorative stemming primarily from use of the equipment to douche a vagina as was more commonly practiced in the past, where such terms would have had more weight than now where the practice is in disuse. Even though the object itself can have uses by both genders, the insult is categorically in the same vein as pejoratives that use anything feminine as an insult:

Panties in a twist.
Sand in your vagina.

It is a gendered insult. That it is common and seen as mostly inoffensive does not prevent that being the case.

 

[AbortedWalrusFetus]

No, you can always used gendered insults against men (well, gendered insults that are derogatory to men). You can just also call white guys crackers (they won't care).

So if a white person DOES care about being called a cracker, it's his fault, because the word cracker isn't a slur? I think that's what you're saying.

 

[Eidan]

Racial slurs aren't being discussed. Both black and white men are equal targets of gendered slurs.

Have we established what the slurs against men are precisely? As I said before, I'm struggling to think of what these words that are meant to specifically attack and demean men and their masculinity are.

 

[Half and half]

From the Kristen Stewert thread it seems that the word bitch is banned and using it can warrant a ban. I am not gonna lie my group of friends do casually use the word bitch to refer to women and i was wondering does GAF do the same or do they use it to refer to women who they feel did something fucked up. *


*Also, why is it wrong for gendered insults for women to be used but if a girl gaffer referred to a guy as a dickhead, cock, prick i doubt people would bat an eyelid.

I used to but am getting away from it.

In general, however, I'll use a different lanuage among friends than I do in public settings (including internet forums).

 

[Fisticuffs]

Jesse Pinkman wouldn't last very long on GAF.

 

[Az987]

Syntactically, both male and female pejoratives are equivalent forms of insult. Both would have to be banned for logical consistency. Anything short is a sort of special pleading, that we have to be unequal for the sake of special interests.

Douchebag itself is a pejorative stemming primarily from use of the equipment to douche a vagina as was more commonly practiced in the past, where such terms would have had more weight than now where the practice is in disuse. Even though the object itself can have uses by both genders, the insult is categorically in the same vein as pejoratives that use anything feminine as an insult:

Panties in a twist.
Sand in your vagina.

I use sand under your foreskin.

I just made it up. Sounds cool

 

[cubicle47b]

Sweet double standard.

I don't necessarily disagree with you but at the same time the straight, white, and male equivalents just don't have the same impact so I'm not going to get up in arms about it.

edit: Someday they might have the same impact, and what a glorious day that will be.

 

[Broder Salsa]

is not like you could change it for "retard" and the insult would be the same.

I always wonder why so many people find retard and that's so retarded to be acceptable, how about all the people with disabilities?

 

[Souther]

Shut it sissy!!

Oh man! I am irate! Livid!

I always wonder why so many people find retard and that's so retarded to be acceptable, how about all the people with disabilities?

When you think about it, it's pretty mean to use it considering. But I do because I've found that it gets people really pissed

 

[ThisWreckage]

My problem with all of this stems from the fact that GAF is a pretty liberal/progressive place. I don't really think these groups, while still minorities, are nearly as ostracized or in need of protection as the moderation thinks, at least on this site. People seem to be pretty open here about all sorts of viewpoints/lifestyles, and it's accomplished mostly through methods other than intimidation.

It feels unnecessary, bordering on white-knighting to me. Yes, words have power, but it feels like outright banning them gives them more of it, and ignores the fact that they have the power to change over time. Some of the uses I've seen for gendered words on this site and their subsequent bans don't even seem to be cases where they were used as slurs against any group in particular, but just generalized insults, as these words sometimes have transformed into.

Well-put, but ultimately a waste.

 

[Tookay]

I always wonder why so many people find retard and that's so retarded to be acceptable, how about all the people with disabilities?

There was a movement to get that word bannable on here too, if I recall correctly.

 

[Devolution]

Have we established what the slurs against men are precisely? As I said before, I'm struggling to think of what these words that are meant to specifically to attack and demean men and their masculinity are.

The ways to demean a man's masculinity is to use insults that are meant for women. So there really isn't a slur directed at masculinity itself since that's the ideal thing to be.

 

[Riggs]

My problem with all of this stems from the fact that GAF is a pretty liberal/progressive place. I don't really think these groups, while still minorities, are nearly as ostracized or in need of protection as the moderation thinks, at least on this site. People seem to be pretty open here about all sorts of viewpoints/lifestyles, and it's accomplished mostly through methods other than intimidation.

It feels unnecessary, bordering on white-knighting to me. Yes, words have power, but it feels like outright banning them gives them more of it, and ignores the fact that they have the power to change over time. Some of the uses I've seen for gendered words on this site and their subsequent bans don't even seem to be cases where they were used as slurs against any group in particular, but just generalized insults, as these words sometimes have transformed into.

Actually agree. Now fuk off we are trying to call each other cunt and sissy the one time we can do it without being banned!

Seriously good post though.

 

[Divvy]

Urban dictionary is probably not the best resource to understand the origins of pejoratives. Atrus already made a good post about it, so I'll just quote that:



It is a gendered insult. That it is common and seen as mostly inoffensive does not prevent that being the case.

Oh, I wasn't arguing it's origins, just it's common usage. Anyways I don't think it's usage now really has much of a link to it's gendered past and we shouldn't judge words soley on that past or else the slur "gay" would be a-okay due to it meaning happy-go-lucky once upon a time.

 

[Dead Man]

I always wonder why so many people find retard and that's so retarded to be acceptable, how about all the people with disabilities?

We've had that thread at least twice on GAF since I've been here. Objective negative versus subjective negative. Physical or mental imparement will always be seen as negative and become an insult. See also, ephemism treadmill.

 

[jorgeton]

It's always about context, OP. Saying you got 99 problems is cool, singling out the female half of an instance of infidelity and calling her a gender-specific slur in the process isn't. Here on NeoGAF the level of discourse isn't high, but a little lurking makes it easy to distinguish between what is and isn't appropriate in a situation like the one described here.

Was gonna post this. Context goes a long way.

 

[Venfayth]

I only get lippy when I'm driving. From behind the wheel of my perfectly driven vehicle all people I find offensive are labeled twats. I also prefer to pronounce the "a" like "vat" not "watt".

Oh man, I'm pretty sure I become a different entity entirely when I'm driving alone in my car. I could weave a tapestry of obscenities that probably still hangs in space over my city.

 

[Mr. F]

My problem with all of this stems from the fact that GAF is a pretty liberal/progressive place. I don't really think these groups, while still minorities, are nearly as ostracized or in need of protection as the moderation thinks, at least on this site. People seem to be pretty open here about all sorts of viewpoints/lifestyles, and it's accomplished mostly through methods other than intimidation.

It feels unnecessary, bordering on white-knighting to me. Yes, words have power, but it feels like outright banning them gives them more of it, and ignores the fact that they have the power to change over time. Some of the uses I've seen for gendered words on this site and their subsequent bans don't even seem to be cases where they were used as slurs against any group in particular, but just generalized insults, as these words sometimes have transformed into.

Well put.

 

[The Anti-Monitor]

Not that many gendered insults I can use in Spanish, and in English I insult everyone equally.

 

[Eidan]

The ways to demean a man's masculinity is to use insults that are meant for women. So there really isn't a slur directed at masculinity itself since that's the ideal thing to be.

And there we go. That's all there really is to it. I'm surprised that the "but what about men" argument could even transcend to slurs, when the only slurs for men aim to depict them as "less than a man".