3rd Strike legend, Kuroda, is going through suicidal depression

CO_Andy

Member

dmagara on r/kappa said:
Most of it is saying how he wants nothing more than to be euthanized, he hates his own face, personality and body, and just seems to be a dark place mentally and writes a lot about self hate and regret about his time spent playing games.

Here are a few rough translations:

"I'm starting to go senile*, so I hope I lose all of my memories of playing games. I suppose I would keep memories of going to Kita-Senju, if anything." (*The term is literally "going senile" but it could refer to a state of being befuddled or losing memory.)

"Instead of people talking about games, people talking about people/human experience is how I communicate. I was never 'being human'."

"A life where you lie to yourself and do what you don't want to will lead to ruin. I need to stop living a life of self-disdain or I can't even breathe."

"My clearest memories are of the times I played games and talked about nothing with the regulars at Kita-Senju GAO, and talking with Umehara. I don't give a damn about my memories of playing games. More importantly, I want to learn to communicate better as a human being." <Only semi-positive tweet there



Incredibly sad all-around. It wasn't that long ago when one of our finest SF players in the U.S.A contemplated suicide.

We wish you the best of luck in overcoming life's greatest challenges, Kuroda. We know you can do it!

Link -- Kuroda's Twitter
 

Yoshichan

And they made him a Lord of Cinder. Not for virtue, but for might. Such is a lord, I suppose. But here I ask. Do we have a sodding chance?
:( I watched so many videos of him back in the days...

Stay strong!!!
 
I remember hearing he had a hard time landing a job a while back. Daigo did have him on BeastTV a few times to introduce him to SF5 and the karaoke thing iirc. Funny enough, even though he seemed to be a gloomy kind of guy on the show, he seemed very willing to be silly with the BeastTv crew.
 

Negaduck

Member
I hope he gets better. He was one of the biggest fighting game inspirations ever, was the reason I played as Q and was truly legendary to watch.

I hope he gets through this, dropping games or not.

;__;
 

Neoxon

Junior Member
I remember hearing stories of him in my arcade community (though I don't remember the details, me being a little kid at the time). The gameplay I've seen of him on YouTube was definitely god-tier.

I wish him nothing but the best, & I hope that he gets through this.
 

WarRock

Member
Goddammit, I can empathize with some parts of that. Wasn't he o BeasTV recently? Hope the other guys can support him.

Edit-
shit, if those comments in the r/kappa thread are true...
 
How old is he? I totally get what he's feeling, but he can still learn to have more meaningful conversations. Even expressing his feelings the way he is, is one step towards human conversations.
 

Picardy

Neo Member
Hoping things get better for him. A lot of my friends in the local FGC look up to the 3rd Strike players, Kuroda included.
 

Lulubop

Member
Kuroda is so ridiculous at 3s I can't think of anyone like him in their respective game. Hope he gets help.

I remember when Du posted that stuff last year, it was really nice to see him on top after all that
 

Seik

Banned
Stay strong bud. :(

Depression can affect anyone, I wish him the best and hopefully he'll get through it safely.
 
Never heard of the guy, casual fighting game fan, but I hope he pulls through.

Kuroda is the reason most 3S technology exists in the first place. Godlike barely covers the level of play he was at. He was a living Oro, handicapping hmself by playing low tier characters like Q and still destroying everyone who came at him.

It's a damn shame that's he's struggling. I hope he has some friends who can help him out.
 

QisTopTier

XisBannedTier
Really hope the people around him help him pull through. Dude is a fucking legend and it would really suck to see him gone from the world.
 
Due to Daigo's mention of it, the idea of expressing one's self through how they play fighting games has become a more prevalent topic of discussion, but I think one of the few legitimate cases of that has been with Kuroda in 3S. From what I've heard he's always been a bit of a glum individual, but I hope he can get the help he needs.

When did this happen?
Knuckledu, about a year ago.
 

Plywood

NeoGAF's smiling token!
Kuroda is the reason most 3S technology exists in the first place. Godlike barely covers the level of play he was at. He was a living Oro, handicapping hmself by playing low tier characters like Q and still destroying everyone who came at him.

It's a damn shame that's he's struggling. I hope he has some friends who can help him out.
I suppose with this in mind I can see why he wants to pull away from it. It's a shame that he so deeply regrets these memories which are to others in many ways accomplishments.
 
This is sad. Kuroda is a legend, probably one that stands alone, but regrets everything that made him so idolized by the community. Hope he pulls through
 

Raiku

Member
Kuroda pls no :((((( I need more of your karaoke in my life....

We all feel shitty now and again but when it gets to this point, I think it's best to seek professional help before things get out of hand. I hope he gets it. Either that or support from friends. Sending love telepathically &#128151;
 

galvatron

Member
Really sad to hear. He's the best I've ever seen in 3s. I hope he can get the help he needs and take his life in a direction he would find fulfilling.
 
"My clearest memories are of the times I played games and talked about nothing with the regulars at Kita-Senju GAO, and talking with Umehara. I don't give a damn about my memories of playing games. More importantly, I want to learn to communicate better as a human being." <Only semi-positive tweet there"

This part was really interesting because Daigo also likes to talk about basically anything but SF5 when he is on the BeastTVstream. Even when he gives talks at a university he likes to talk about his view on life and society and not just about the game. Probably that is why he specifically mentioned Daigo Umehara in this part. Maybe Kuroda will show up at the next event, since he wasn't too shabby at that.
 

HonMirin

Member
Fuck you depression. Fuck you.

Evil illness it is, takes so much and fights so hard to keep you under.

Hope my man gets the help and support he needs and pulls through. He's an amazing talent and so gifted. Stay strong dude.
 

Mr. X

Member
Years ago he was like almost homeless and was wearing worn out clothes (holes in sneakers) trying to get a job. Sucks it sounds like he's still having a hard time.
 

NastyBook

Member
Can hardly imagine how he feels, but hope the community over there can give him a shoulder to lean on before he get back up on his own two feet.

Best of luck, fella.
 

Oresama

Member
Man I hope old friends intervene. Dude is crying out for help.

What's more disturbing is, check his "likes" tab on Twitter *Warning very graphic.
 

Kaako

Felium Defensor
Damn. I hope he gets the help he needs. Some of those quotes hit home.
Fuck you, depression.
 

Poppy

Member
i can really empathize with him and hope he manages to find help for a problem that i personally need to manage better for myself as well

also his Q is legendary
 

gogogow

Member
Depression is no joke. I don't quite understand how he got it from the OP. Does he feel like he wasted his youth on videogames? Either way, I hope his friends and family are there to support him 24/7.
 
Depression is no joke. I don't quite understand how he got it from the OP. Does he feel like he wasted his youth on videogames? Either way, I hope his friends and family are there to support him 24/7.

Are you implying depression is a transmissible disease?
 

fatalexe

Member
From a Hafiz Karim, found in the Malaysian Fighting Games Facebook Group
https://m.facebook.com/groups/145709472235467?view=permalink&id=946710838801989

(Long post)

Sad to hear about this. Although sadder to see people making blind assumptions such as the "games" are the caused of his depression without even knowing the guy personally.
.
I wouldn't say I knew him that well, but I've met him a few times although the first time was back in 2011 at a gaming event in Tokyo, we played SF4 for hours and after the event is done at around 11pm, we just walked around tokyo for hours(until around 2am?) while he pushed his bicycle and talked about everything other than gaming. Sure while playing, we did talk about games, but afterwards we talked about a range of topics that were pretty deep and some even philosophical in nature. He is maybe a classic case of being an introvert, and not the type of introverts that shows up their introversion with hashtags and sharing articles talking about how special they are. He doesn't have many friends, at least the kinds that talk about non-gaming topics, and he told me and my friends that its really a breath of fresh air for him to talk to people about all of these other topics that aren't related to gaming at all. Sure some of the things might be "weird" (think of it more like a child asking "whys" type of questions). Overall, dude is a cool, but not without his peculiarities/quirks, but I can see how he might have problems socializing or making friends, especially in Japan.
.
Not until a few years later I discovered a weekly column type thing written by him (Kuroda), and learned about his other issues: family, financial, i think something about his mother etc. So yeah, he was having a rough time in life(and still is), and some people say things like, oh he's depressed because his "game"(3S) is no longer relevant etc.
.
So, yeah, depression is a real issue, and people shouldn't quickly judge those they dont know by saying silly stuff. All we can do is at least show support (if we want to) and have some kind of empathy towards another human being.
.
 
Isn't this like a nation wide epidemic for young people in japan? Sad to hear. :\

IIRC Japan has always had crazy high suicide rates. Probably a consequence of its extremely high stakes, highly competitive, highly conformative work culture. If you're not a perfectly fitting piece of the machinery, society shuns you.

It's really no surprise that athletes would be hit hard with this once their prime years wane (that's already an issue athletes have in general), and cyberathletes, while perhaps less extremely, also become less competitive as age takes its toll on reflexes and such.

In this case it seems he doesn't even enjoy playing all that much, and being a competitive player means playing a fucking ton, probably way beyond what one would enjoy in even the best of circumstances. That would be enough to send a person straight to depression even if one hadn't a predisposition to it, but if he also had that... I can't imagine what he must be going through. :(
 
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