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Are you good with women/men?

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I dunno, why don't you ask your Mom?

With a little practice and sick burnz like my example above, you'll be throwing d left and right.
 
I tend to avoid relationships because I hurt people. It also doesn't help that I don't attract the women I'm into. So I'm kind of living life without a partner.

Every girl I've had sex the with was someone I wasn't into, so I don't even associate sex with joy or anything.
 
Not really. I guess I work better with males, but I can also work with women too.

When it comes to relationships though... I'm basically a reverse Casanova.
 
JoseLopez said:
I think I'm way to shy
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So am I, which is why I struggle to meet people, but once that initial barrier/ice is broken, it's perfectly fine. You just have to find ways to bypass that. I've been in a really long relationship that is just now ending, so I need to get back out there and start meeting people again. And I don't mean dating again, but rather just building a social circle outside of coworkers. I was too busy at home in a relationship + work + her kids to ever make time for myself and go out and make friends, so now I have to figure out a way to do that which doesn't involve coworkers/classmates. Once i'm moved out and stuff, I'm totally welcome to tips on how to just make new friends/acquaintances that doesn't involve going to a bar by myself or something. I moved away from home for work and didn't ever make any new friends where I live and I'll be moving to a new town shortly, again, so I'll be totally friendless... again.

I'll find a way, I assume, but I do feel lost in that regard.
 
I don't really go out of my way to meet new people. I have a very "if it happens it happens" way of living and it's been working out so far. I have noticed that for, whatever reason, I have WAY more female friends than male.
 
I'm all right, though I've been in a relationship for nearly two years now, so I haven't really been put to the test in a while. For a couple years, though, I was on a crazy tear of dates. Sometimes I'd stack multiple dates in a single weekend. I think I was just kinda making up for lost time - my teens and very early 20s were a pretty dry period where I was way too self-conscious to talk to girls.

Anywho, what I learned during this time is that honesty is truly the best policy. I became way more successful in dating once I dropped any notion of playing games or second-guessing myself. I was straight-up and honest about what I wanted and what I was interested in, and the response was almost uniformly positive. Even girls that weren't into me ended up appreciating it because there was no beating around the bush. The handful of times I wanted to go on a second date and the girl didn't, the exchange was pretty much always this:

Me: "Hey, I had a great time on DATE X and I'd love to hang out again. How about Day Y?
Her: "Hey, sorry, I'm not really interested in hanging out again."
Me: "No worries. For what it's worth, I had a good time. :)"
Her: "Thanks for being cool! Best of luck!"

On the second date I had with the girl who I've now been with for nearly two years (and live with), I laid my cards out on the table. I pretty much said, "Hey, I just wanna let you know - I'm looking for something that'll eventually turn into a relationship. I've done the casual thing, and it's fun, but that's pretty much where my head's at these days." She later told me that this is what clinched her continuing to date me, because she knew exactly where we stood, and what my intentions were.

It also helped that I said this without saying something ridiculously intense like, "I want to be your boyfriend and eventually cohabitate with you. Do you concur?"

To sum it all up, the best advice I can give is that relationship cliches are cliches for a reason. Being yourself and being honest will do you so many favors in life, but it's especially true in dating. Will many women not buy what you're selling? Yeah, of course, but you're saving yourself a lot of time by clearing it up then and there. Plus, people find it very attractive when someone is confident about what they want and who they are. Just remember to remain respectful and you'll be good to go. :)
 
I am a bit in between. I get along well with a certain type of women and a certain type of guy. My friend group in college was very mixed gender wise, in the real world it has moved to mostly just guys as it is harder to bridge the gender gap as friends without mutual connections.
 
Yea I have trouble too... A girl in my class would ask me for help and gave me her number. She was definitely not the type to sit down and study. When she texted it was never about homework. Probably should've asked her to a date. Even got her sisters number. Both were flirty. Oops going down memory lane
 
I don't like to brag...but I did convince a woman to move in with me and spend the rest of her life with me, so...yeah, I do alright.

I'm super awkward with women and I have no idea how any of this came to be.
 
The first few times I'd ever been out to a bar, I was full of confidence and found it really easy to start chatting with women. However, a string of consecutive rejections quickly obliterated that confidence and I can only really be comfortable now around women I know well. Even after settling down with my partner, I still can't shake the anxiety of talking to strange women.

Strange men, on the other hand, are a breeze to talk to. But I've been dragged away from such chats many times by friends insisting I was talking to a gay guy that was trying to make an advance on me.
 
Nothing amazing but from what I've been told, women like how I talk, my laugh apparently gets them smiling (not sure if this is a compliment or not) and how I just say whatever comes into my head.

They also seem to like that I can be talking about one thing and just jump to something and hold a decent conversation in that subject too.

Honestly, as clichéd as it is, I just approach women I'm interested in like I would anyone else. I don't go in with any baggage and if we hit it off during a conversation, I'll take the next step and ask to swap details/ask her out on a date.
 
No. It's actually pretty funny.

I've "stumbled" into every relationship I've been in, same with one night stands. The women usually does all the flirting because I seem to be oblivious until it's obvious.
 
I have good relationships with people like friendship irrespective of gender but I struggle with romance when it comes to women and hints/signals. I don't understand romance, I don't know how to be romantic. The only thing that has worked in terms of romance for me is actually one of my hobbies... I do amateur astronomy and I often drive out from the city and do my thing, like at a B&B where there's no light pollution. When I have shared my hobby/experience with someone of interest as part of a date there has been a few occasions now where they've said it's romantic (because of the stars/milky way and atmosphere). The thing is I don't know what makes it romantic, I don't understand it, I can't even tell if someone is being romantic towards me, it's kind of frustrating

It's all I know and I don't know how to pursue interests further, I don't know how to take an intimate/romantic relationship further, I constantly stress if I should or if it's right or wonder if they want that.

Always after the fact it's clear as day the hints/signals from someone, but I can never see it at the time. This is made even worse when you have male and female friends and family that still are like "how are you still single" etc. I've taken the chances, I've also been rejected, I'm not afraid of being rejected - every male is afraid of it but you get over it at a point. It's just I don't know how to pursue anything further. It's easy to tell the signals/hint when someone is uninterested from the get-go, it's the issue when something has progressed even a little where the issue crops up.

This is not something I've told anyone in real life but I have said it on GAF before. At one point I had the best relationship I ever had with someone and it was going far and so well, I got so caught up in it that one night I said something so stupid "I'd love to marry you one day". The relationship wasn't at that point really yet but it's how I felt even though I actually had no intention of marrying her or anyone any time soon and I said it for some reason, that scared her off understandably and I screwed it up entirely and ended the relationship because of that. Only her and her sister know about it. It was also a relationship that we completely stumbled into as complete strangers in public, no mutual friends, nothing. It was the best I ever had, and not understanding where a relationship is or where to take it screwed it up.

In terms of people flirting initially with me, it's a mixed bag, sometimes it's obvious, sometimes not. Again, it's always so super obvious after the fact. I've had a
 
Well I guess the romance is sharing your passion with somebody, a hobby that is both quiet and personal and also sharing a beautiful, thought provoking experience.

Everybody has looked up at the night sky and wondered what's up there and you can offer some insight.
 
Apparently am very good with womens i mean i am extremely friendly with every girl at work but thats it i just can't made that extra step to be in relationship :l
 
I'm pretty good at making platonic male or female friends it's just that I have no urge to do so. I feel no bone in my body that gives a damn about having friends. It doesn't really bother me until someone points it out to me and makes it out to be a weird thing. Then I feel really lonely for a bit and then get over it and go back to being a loner.

I've never had a girlfriend and don't think I ever will unless someone I like asks me out. All of the girls I'm attracted to are always taken and the ones that come on to me I'd rather fuck a cactus than be with them. And plus I get really flustered around attractive women and always retreat to another room as soon as possible.
 
I have an easy time talking with women and men.

Now when it comes to actually spitting game and trying to get in a lady's panties, no I have no game in that regard.
 
I'm fine with starting a relationship with women, theres no problem there. They haven't lasted as long as I've hoped though. Haven't met the right person I guess. plenty I need to work on too.
 
linkboy said:
I get along better with women then I do men (I'm a guy).
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Honestly same, I have a bunch of female friends and make them easily or go out if with them if I'm inclined, but my friendships with guys have kind of been a wash largely though I do have a few close ones.

Its just the intial approaching and striking up a conversation and continuing it. With women there's plenty of incentive (that and girls take care of themselves way more than guys in general), with guys I honestly can't be assed so I stick with close friends I grew up with or if they make friends with me. That and most of my female friends have always been far more reliable than my male friends so that psychological aspect likely plays a part.
 
Since I started doing the whole dating thing early this year (I'm 22) I have grown miles ahead of where I was before. I kissed for the first time (that wasn't in a club or party), sex for the first time (and quite a few times after that), gone on god knows how many dates, watched movies, all that. I wouldn't say I'm confident in my ability yet, but I'm way more confident than I have ever been. Meeting a woman alone in a romantic setting is not a big deal for me anymore, I barely even get nervous.

To anyone who is struggling with all this, take it from someone who was exactly like you: somewhat awkward, virgin, never kissed etc. Start using an online dating service. It'll be difficult in the beginning, but you'll get there. We have threads here on GAF (Dating-Age and Online Dating OTs) that helped me immensely.

This is all online dating though. I haven't dipped my toe in asking girls out in real life yet, and I doubt I will. Online dating is just so much more comfortable and it gets the job done.
 
SirJackDaniels said:
I'd say im good with women. I really dont care what i say, i just talk random shit, works fine for me.
One of my random conversations:

ME: "Hey, bla bla bla bla bla"
HER: "Did you really say bla bla bla bla to me"
ME: "Yes"
HER: "You are awesome"
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This is me, lol

Joyful said:
attractive people can get away with anything
are you attractive
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Dennis said:
Do be: attractive

Don't be: unattractive
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Being attractive helps, but confidence is almost just as important. Thank the lord I have both. Haven't for most of my life, didn't happen until I started enjoying my life and came out of my shell. You have to enjoy your life and be confident about how awesome you are to show that confidence off and attract the opposite sex.
 
isny said:
This is me, lol





Being attractive helps, but confidence is almost just as important. Thank the lord I have both.
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Confidence is the most important I'd say as not every woman is looking for the hottest guy around, because everyone's not that shallow. People tend to latch onto what you think of yourself, especially they are indifferent.
 
Orcastar said:
I'm not good with anyone, which is why I've never been in a relationship and only have like three friends.

Male.
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I'll be your friend! Now you have four!

Principate said:
Confidence is the most important I'd say as not every woman is looking for the hottest guy around, because everyone's not that shallow. People tend to latch onto what you think of yourself, especially they are indifferent.
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My current GF and all of her friends were impressed with my confidence and how upfront I was making the first move. As misoganistic as it as and as much as I hate it, guys typically have to make the first move, which is a big part of that confidence. Going on a first date and exuding confidence and then making the first move at the end of the night if things seem to be going well goes a long way and leaves a huge first impression.
 
isny said:
I'll be your friend! Now you have four!



My current GF and all of her friends were impressed with my confidence and how upfront I was making the first move. As misoganistic as it as and as much as I hate it, guys typically have to make the first move, which is a big part of that confidence. Going on a first date and exuding confidence and then making the first move at the end of the night if things seem to be going well goes a long way and leaves a huge first impression.
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Yep basically it's one of those unwritten social norms which obviously comes from patriarchy I'd wager is part of the social condition for the majority of the world. It's why confident and upfront guys have the most "success" because it's the easiest way to build up rapport and the majority of guys are unable to do it (the whole confidence spiral and all that).

Honestly rarely had it go wrong and obvious those times are easy to deal with (issue is a lot of people can't deal with those times, the confidence plummets and gets worse from there).
 
I've never had any signals thrown at me subtle, or not at least not recently so... ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I'm decent enough at noticing them though.
 
Typically get along better with women than men (only have one male friend versus about seven female friends). No relationships though.
 
Always felt like it took very little effort to become friend, but even less effort to maintain a friendship regardless of sex. The main issue is people getting over the wall of psyching themselves out thinking no one cares. People want to talk, people want to share opinions, people will generally want to hang out with new people (including you) if you're actively putting yourself out there.

Shit like meetup.com makes it impossible to not find people you'll click with even if only for a day or two. Man or woman, just having a sliver of confidence is enough imo. Also saying you don't like talking to people means you just haven't found the right people to connect with. It's a big world, inevitably someone out there is into the same dumb shit you are.
 
I'd like to think so. I've dated a lot of women who when I first met thought they were way out of my league. I'm fairly average looking so I must be doing something right.
 
This is a really good question and I've thought about this a lot recently... in fact, tomorrow I'm making a huge move on someone that I've fallen in love with the past 5-6 weeks.

It's weird though, when I feel zero sexual attraction or attraction whatsoever towards a woman, I can flirt, joke and talk so, SO much. As soon as I find "the one", I become a boring asocial person who can't for the sake of me come up with anything to talk about when the opportunity is given. I dont fucking get it.
 
I used to be, but I never capitalized on it because I've been in a relationship for a long time. I had low self esteem in high school, so I misread a lot of advances. Then in the first two years of college, the advances were numerous and a lot more overt but I still said no. Now I'm in grad school and a reclusive husk of my former self, so the only woman I ever talk to is my girl. Can't really muster up the energy to talk to anybody at all that I don't already know, tbh.

Monogamy rulez

a8Y2OQ1_700b.jpg
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Like, specifically romantically? I never was good with women, no, and I'm pretty sure I missed a lot of signals in my adolescent years - and the ones I did pick up on I usually wasn't sure where to go with it.

/shrug made for some frustrating years in high school and college but coming up on the tenth anniversary with my wife (best 10 years of my life and couldn't imagine a better relationship) on Thursday so I can't complain about a few awkward years early on when I was young and dumb.
 
Fiction said:
I'm good with everyone. People in general are easy for me to read. I can meet a stranger and talk for hours. It's just how I am.
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I can do that, though it took at lot of work to get to that point. Not natural by ay sense of the imagination but it's due to be being comfortable to show a largely unfiltered view of myself, and talking to enough people I stopped caring (as in a confidence hit sort of way) what they thought of me.
 
I'm very good at reading signal from people I have no interest in and terrible at reading signals from girls I actually have a crush on. It's sad
 
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