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Bout to do this colonoscopy prep tomorrow

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you'll basically be shooting water out of your butt during the prep FYI. the diarrhea will feel like a waterfall surging out of your butt.

the colonoscopy itself is i don't remember at all as i was drugged out.
 
Opt out of the sedation. The procedure doesn't last long and it's not really painful and you'll be glad to have your full conscience right after.
 
thekonamicode said:
Just don't break eye contact with the doctor.
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phil-x said:
Opt out of the sedation.
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mmazurkiewicz said:
the colonoscopy itself is i don't remember at all as i was drugged out.
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The intense stomach cramps after the procedure due to the air pushed in to maneuver the camera hurt like hell afterwards until you fart.

But man that fart. If I'd have know I would've recorded it because I swear it must've lasted a solid 2 minutes easy. And then there were the stragglers the rest of the day.
 
It was fine, OP. I did this in Jan of '14. It's actually really gentle. You shouldn't feel any gut-pain or anything. Just be ready to have a constant full stomach of liquid, and then minutes later, shit that same liquid out until you shit clear. Here are the cons with my experience.

-If you're doing it over night, be prepared to not sleep much.
-Have a blanket. That stuff makes you freeze your ass off. I was seriously freezing for most of the night, and even before the proceedure.
-There's so much of that stuff you have to drink. Pace yourself.

Pros
-Have a Playstation Vita or a tablet with a Netflix account. If you're going to be in the shitter for 8 hours, it'd be good to have some entertainment.
 
You wouldn't imagine the farting noises coming from the little bathroom after we did virtual colonoscopies. (I worked as an X-ray tech)

Grip the porcelain throne with both hands and enjoy the ride, my friend.
 
Use wipes or soft toilet paper day-of because you're going to wipe so often that anything rougher is going to chap your ass.
 
Yeah, the worst part of the prep is how raw your asshole will feel by the end. Like someone said, alternating baby wipes with toilet paper is probably the best way to go.

The actual procedure is completely fine.

After it's done, make sure to stay plenty hydrated for a good 3 or 4 days. I've had 2 colonoscopies so far, and both times the first post-poop caused some very painful stomach cramps because I hadn't been drinking enough.
 
HeySeuss said:
The intense stomach cramps after the procedure due to the air pushed in to maneuver the camera hurt like hell afterwards until you fart.

But man that fart. If I'd have know I would've recorded it because I swear it must've lasted a solid 2 minutes easy. And then there were the stragglers the rest of the day.
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I had an endoscopy recently and it's the same recovery room for the endoscopies and the colonoscopies. those farts were MIRACULOUS. I've never heard anything like it.
 
Pick a flavor of Gatorade you'll feel okay never wanting to touch again. I picked orange. I can never even smell orange Gatorade now without getting a sick feeling. And I'm okay with that.
 
It's not too bad. As others said, the evacuation part isn't fun but the colonoscopy itself isn't as horrible as you might imagine. You might feel some pain here and there, but it's manageable really. It's mostly just kinda....awkward.
 
I got one before because my doctor thought I maybe had cancer. Turned out I didn't. Still glad I got it.

Basically the prep is the WORST part. I had to drink from two large pitchers of gatorade mixed with an entire bottle of Miralax. Yes, an entire bottle. I had to drink from the pitchers every 15 minutes until all the liquid was gone. You will shit like never before. You will be starving after you stop shitting your brains out, but unable to eat until after the procedure the next day. It SUCKS.

The procedure itself is painless. For me all I remember was seeing a nurse beforehand for a brief explanation of what will happen and then she got my vitals. Then I went to the room for the procedure, I laid down, they injected propofol into my body. I closed my eyes. I then opened them as I was growing impatient that I had not passed out yet, but when I did, IT WAS ALREADY OVER. Amazing!

You'll toss and turn in your bed and fart a bunch of times, and they'll go over your results. If it's nothing serious you'll get up and go home. It's that simple.

Hopefully your experience will be just as painless.
 
Hoo-doo said:
Checking out the stomach by sticking a tube up the rectum seems impractical, to say the least.
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It's one of many tests to diagnose Crohn's disease, Ulcerative Colitis, diverticulitis and other IBD symptoms (and of course, colon cancer/polyps). Usually in conjunction with an endoscopy and other treatments.

Unfortunately, stomach ailments are diagnosed through a process of elimination, so you do 'em all.
 
Demon Ice said:
Haha yeah, usually routine screening with colonoscopy doesn't start til age 50, lots of old timers on GAF :P
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I'm 26, but I've had stomach problems for years and my doctor wanted to rule out Crohn's, colitis, and diverticulitis. The most recent one was this past June because of melena I experienced after food poisoning (and included endoscopy). I've been fine after all of them, and the official diagnosis is IBS. I don't know if doctors now are quicker to send patients in for scopes than in the past, or if awareness of stomach problems is on the rise. Whatever the reason it does not seem uncommon for younger people to have the procedure done.
 
Get your battle station set up next to the toilet. Bring a little TV tray or table in there and get your electronics set up. You are going to spend so much time on the toilet. It's not painful, or really all that unpleasant, you will just have liquid shooting out of your butt in speed and volume that seems to break the laws of physics.

The prep mix tastes terrible, just chug it as fast as you can and get it over with.

Remember no red dye in your drinks and no pulp. I drank a lot of ginger ale and clear flavor gatorade.

Demon Ice said:
Haha yeah, usually routine screening with colonoscopy doesn't start til age 50, lots of old timers on GAF :P
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I have a family history, so I had my first two years ago at 37, they found and removed 3 polyps. I have my next one next year. I'll have to have them every ~3-5 years for the rest of my life. I'm pretty much guaranteed to die of colon cancer otherwise, well worth it.
 
Yeah the prep is definitely the worst part. Not fun. But the procedure itself isn't terrible like I thought it would be. My doc is named Dr. Majuk, pronounced Dr. Magic, and he was making butt jokes throughout the entire procedure.
 
Get ready for the night of a thousand waterfalls.

Honestly it wasn't that bad. I started chugging my prep around 4:30pm and by 11:30pm I was cleaned out.
 
phil-x said:
Opt out of the sedation. The procedure doesn't last long and it's not really painful and you'll be glad to have your full conscience right after.
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Don't listen to this man. The sedation is the only good thing about this procedure. They will put a gardening hose up your butt but you will feel happy and relaxed.
 
Aselith said:
Will it be bad, guys? It sounds kind of bad. :/
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It's not that bad. You have to drink a large container of a laxative (that tastes nasty) to clean out your colon. Be prepared to go to the bathroom a lot. That's all. It's actually the worse of the whole procedure. The actual colonoscopy was over in seconds ( because you will be put to sleep in 14 seconds) True story, I asked the nurse how long does the anesthesia take to take effect, and she said about 14 seconds, then I got tapped on the shoulder to wake up. 40 minutes went by in realtime, but from my perspective it was a matter of seconds. I let off a couple of loud farts, as I sat up.
 
I think I'm the only one who doesn't mind the miralax. I don't think it tastes like anything. It just thickens the Gatorade.

I expect OP to become more active in this thread as the rumbling begins.

One more tip: don't wear a shirt today. There will be splashback and it will get everywhere. Better to keep clothing out of harm's way.
 
I've got one on Friday the 13th of all days.

My bowels have been playing up for a while now but last week I had seriously painful cramps for three days and ended up in hospital. They think it was an inflamed colon and want to me to have one of these. Can't say I'm too worried about the procedure itself but the prep sounds like a real pain in the ass. :/

I also had some conflicting instructions regarding the salts thing. My appointment's on the Friday afternoon at 1.30 but the instruction booklet says take two of the sachets in the evening before and two on the day while the actual box says to take all four on the day. Think I'll phone up the hospital at some point.
 
WadiumArcadium said:
I've got one on Friday the 13th of all days.

My bowels been playing up for a while now but last week I had seriously painful cramps for three days and ended up in hospital. They think it was an inflamed colon and want to me to have one of these. Can't say I'm too worried about the procedure itself but the prep sounds like a real pain in the ass. :/

I also had some conflicting instructions regarding the salts thing. My appointment's on the Friday afternoon but the instruction booklet says take two of the sachets in the evening before and two on the day while the actual box says to take all four on the day. Think I'll phone up the hospital at some point.
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Well it's not actually painful, unless you've got other things going on that cause pain.

I did the 4 packets 30 minutes apart all in one go in the morning, IIRC. It probably doesn't matter as long as you don't eat anything after starting. Definitely call them up if you have any questions. I called them because the schedule they had me on would have me shooting liquid out of my butt on the way to the clinic and they told me to go ahead and start 30 minutes earlier than the schedule that was given to me.

Aselith said:
Alright one glass of the solution down and it wasn't too bad. I don't feel anything, guys, I think I'm immu-

elmopooping.gif
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Yeah, I think everyone goes from "Hey I don't think this is working" to "Holy crap, my butthole is a firehose" in the span of about 30 seconds.
 
Trouble said:
Well it's not actually painful, unless you've got other things going on that cause pain.

I did the 4 packets 30 minutes apart all in one go in the morning, IIRC. It probably doesn't matter as long as you don't eat anything after starting. Definitely call them up if you have any questions. I called them because the schedule they had me on would have me shooting liquid out of my butt on the way to the clinic and they told me to go ahead and start 30 minutes earlier than the schedule that was given to me.
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Yeah, I'll phone them at some point to make sure. Don't wanna be caught short.
 
Hmm, I actually haven't had to poop yet. I mixed the Miralax in like 84 oz of Gatorade instead of 64. Hope that didn't mess it up :/
 
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