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Cracked goes IN on Jurassic World

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I mean, you tried.

I mean, did you literally even watch the scene? It's straight up snuff porn, and it only exists because she's a "snooty bitch" who the audience should want to see killed because uh, reasons.
It exists, because they wanted a cool pteranodon/mosasaur kill scene. They chose her because it's better than a no name extra. The actress found it cool and did her own stunts. She survived and doesn't hate women.
 
The moment I read "straight up snuff porn" for a death scene where there isn't a single drop of blood is the moment I know this argument isn't going anywhere.
 
For people against the Zara death scene: you want that scene deleted/ changed just because she's a woman. Think about that for a second.
 
I watch the assistant's death in slow-mo. Just love how brutal it is. Not as terrifying as the raptor jumping from the bushes in part 1, but it's up there.
 
Well, the acknowledgment of Eddies death in TLW worked.

Considering last Claire knew, Zara was supposed to be with the kids it makes sense that she would ask. It's actually weird as hell that she doesn't.

It's so absurd how they completely forgot about her and her death. Then again they forget about everything all the time.

The movie is such a mess, they should really just drop any story and for the next one just make set pieces of dinosaur chases in which the dinosaur may or may not be successful in the chase/hunt. It would be like a million times better and entertaining than Jurassic World.
 
For people against the Zara death scene: you want that scene deleted/ changed just because she's a woman. Think about that for a second.

Eh, I'm not against the scene because she's a woman. I'm against the scene because it's comical.

*dinosaurs are flying around picking people off*
Her: "KIDS!? WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN!? WAIT--WHY ARE YOU RUNNING AROUND!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!"
Kids: "TAKE A GOOD FUCKING LOOK AROUND, WOMAN! DINOS EVER--"

*She's picked up and put through an over the top death scene*
 
I watch the assistant's death in slow-mo. Just love how brutal it is. Not as terrifying as the raptor jumping from the bushes in part 1, but it's up there.
THAT is brutal. I remember when I got the DVD I thought it was extended because I didn't remember it being as long and visible on vhs.

As soon as I saw it, coupled with Spielberg's penchant for bad fathers, I knew that film hated men.
Eh, I'm not against the scene because she's a woman. I'm against the scene because it's comical.

*dinosaurs are flying around picking people off*
Her: "KIDS!? WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN!? WAIT--WHY ARE YOU RUNNING AROUND!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!"
Kids: "TAKE A GOOD FUCKING LOOK AROUND, WOMAN! DINOS EVER--"

*She's picked up and put through an over the top death scene*
Don't you think you should view it as lighthearted as that? Or is it because it's a woman. It will always come back to that if you cant view as intended.
 
I watch the assistant's death in slow-mo. Just love how brutal it is. Not as terrifying as the raptor jumping from the bushes in part 1, but it's up there.

I really liked that sequence. And stuff that went on before that, civilians died. Who should the directors have chosen to replace Zara in order to please the people here? A regular Joe? Don't think so because that would go against the argument that the scene is bad because an innocent person died. An antagonist of the movie? The movies antagonist gets what's coming to him later. So..scratch the scene altogether? Hell no it was awesome. The audience knew Zara and that's what made the scene horrifying, it showed the terror of these dinosaurs and it worked.
 
As soon as I saw it, coupled with Spielberg's penchant for bad fathers, I knew that film hated men.
This guy, lol. I love how personal you take everything bad said about Jurassic World. Tell me more.

The audience knew Zara and that's what made the scene horrifying, it showed the terror of these dinosaurs and it worked.
Considering the scene is still one of the biggest sticking points about the film however many months later suggests that it didn't. The reaction was less the intended "oh shit" and more "what the hell was that all about?"
 
My only problem with the scene is that they don't even acknowledge it later. At least it would've had meaning that way.
 
This guy, lol. I love how personal you take everything about this film, tell me more.


Considering the scene is still one of the biggest sticking points about the film however many months later suggests that it didn't. The reaction was less the intended "oh shit" and more "what the hell was that all about?"

I disagree.

Please tell me you're joking with this.

If that's not the crux of the issue, then I misunderstood and apologize. Thing is, so far what I've read in this thread is that her death is undeserved because she's an innocent woman.
 
Oh, okay. Conversation over.

Sorry forgot the finish the reply, started on another quote. Thing is, I didn't have the same feeling, I loved that they used the fish Dino. The scene reminded me of the classic cartoon sequence in which a bird catches a small fish, the bird flies over the water and gets swallowed by a larger fish, and that fish gets caught and cooked. I liked it.
 
My only problem with the scene is that they don't even acknowledge it later. At least it would've had meaning that way.

It wouldn't have added any meaning. There is no meaning to it. Someone was killed. Zara wasn't some fleshed out character that we had any semblance of emotion for, but we weren't supposed to. It was nothing more than an "oh shit" moment. Some people have a problem with that, but others don't see it as a big deal, including myself. If they acknowledged her death after, it would have added absolutely zilch to the preceding. The story kept moving and there were bigger stakes at large.
 
This guy, lol. I love how personal you take everything bad said about Jurassic World. Tell me more.


Considering the scene is still one of the biggest sticking points about the film however many months later suggests that it didn't. The reaction was less the intended "oh shit" and more "what the hell was that all about?"
I'm sorry you are taking my sarcasm so personally.
 
Haven't read the full article, but if this is about the assistant dying, that scene felt weird in the moment. It's just so brutal and mean. The way it's staged, the visual language, feels like it is supposed to be some horrible character getting their comeuppance. Except there is nothing the character does in the movie that actually justifies it. The scene felt really off to me.

I agree, but I feel like they intentionally did it to horrify us.
 
My only problem with the scene is that they don't even acknowledge it later. At least it would've had meaning that way.

To be fair, a lot of people died in the movie and the people in charge didn't even flinch. I was more attached to the security guard that the Irex chewed on than Zara.
 
Again: I don't have any problems with her death scene. I'm just saying that at least acknowledging it would've made it better for those who do.

And "The story kept moving and there were bigger stakes at large"... come on. Owen and Claire stop the action to kiss, amidst all the chaos. If the movie can take five seconds for that, it can take another five for someone to say "man, Zara got fucked."

And I like the movie. But it has some undeniable issues. Not everyone criticizing it is a hater.
 
And "The story kept moving and there were bigger stakes at large"... come on. Owen and Claire stop the action to kiss, amidst all the chaos. If the movie can take five seconds for that, it can take another five for someone to say "man, Zara got fucked."

They're the main characters and this was part of their arc. Zara had no depth or an arc. She was a casualty among many. And I'm still having a difficult time figuring out how having "Zara got fucked" dialogue would have helped anything. Nobody cared about her that much.

To be fair, a lot of people died in the movie and the people in charge didn't even flinch. I was more attached to the security guard that the Irex chewed on than Zara.

Agreed. Poor guy. When he kissed his cross I was like shiiiit

But, you know, I didn't need Owen to deliver a soliloquy about him after that.
 
Sorry forgot the finish the reply, started on another quote. Thing is, I didn't have the same feeling, I loved that they used the fish Dino. The scene reminded me of the classic cartoon sequence in which a bird catches a small fish, the bird flies over the water and gets swallowed by a larger fish, and that fish gets caught and cooked. I liked it.
There's still not much here to say other than you liked it and others clearly didn't. In my feelings on the manner it's a pointlessly drawn out scene that grinds the pacing of the scene to a screeching halt, is entirely unearned, and absolutely soured the rest of the viewing experience. Felt like something out of a slasher film--extended violence for the sake of extended violence.

The purpose of the scene (rampant terrifying chaos) could have been accomplished in roughly one-third of the time and the greater pterosaur sequence would have been better off.

I'm sorry you are taking my sarcasm so personally.
Nice save.
 
There's still not much here to say other than you liked it and others clearly didn't. In my feelings on the manner it's a pointlessly drawn out scene that grinds the pacing of the scene to a screeching halt, is entirely unearned, and absolutely soured the rest of the viewing experience. Felt like something out of a slasher film--extended violence for the sake of extended violence.

The purpose of the scene (rampant terrifying chaos) could have been accomplished in roughly one-third of the time and the greater pterosaur sequence would have been better off.


Nice save.
Hey, I'm mocking the sentiments, you're mocking me.
 
They're the main characters and this was part of their arc. Zara had no depth or an arc. She was a casualty among many. And I'm still having a difficult time figuring out how having "Zara got fucked" dialogue would have helped anything. Nobody cared about her that much.

It doesn't matter how fond Zach and Gray were of Zara. They're still two kids who watched someone they (kinda) know die a brutal death. I'm not saying they should be traumatized for the remainder of the movie because no one wants to see that, but it's gotta at least get a reaction from them.
 
Can't believe people came away from a dinosaur movie crying sexism because a women died. An over the top death in a summer blockbuster? I never!
 
It doesn't matter how fond Zach and Gray were of Zara. They're still two kids who watched someone they (kinda) know die a brutal death. I'm not saying they should be traumatized for the remainder of the movie because no one wants to see that, but it's gotta at least get a reaction from them.

If you go back and watch the scene they do react to it and look fucking horrified.
 
It doesn't matter how fond Zach and Gray were of Zara. They're still two kids who watched someone they (kinda) know die a brutal death. I'm not saying they should be traumatized for the remainder of the movie because no one wants to see that, but it's gotta at least get a reaction from them.

Dude, during that whole scene and a couple of minutes before, park visitors, families were being torn apart by the pteradactyls. The kids didn't show mich emotion,to that either.
 
Dude, during that whole scene and a couple of minutes before, park visitors, families were being torn apart by the pteradactyls. The kids didn't show mich emotion,to that either.

I just rewatched the scene but they don't see anyone specifically get torn apart or whatever. It's very chaotic, they're not subjected to anything particularly gruesome, apart from Zara's death, and they do visibly react to that.
 
"turn your brain off, don't try and pay attention to much to the acting/story and just sit back and relax, it was fun, me and my wife enjoyed it". 9/10

Number of things wrong with this: 0

I'm not saying people shouldn't think critically, they should. I think pretty critically about Jurassic Park. I fucking hate The Lost World. I despise almost everything about it with every fabric of my being. But I have my own personal reasons as to why I feel that way about it, but feel totally different about Jurassic World. Like I said earlier, I don't turn my brain off for anything. I didn't for movies like Transformers, Van Helsing, V/H/S, or schlock like that and I think those are fucking terrible, nearly bottom of the barrel quality movies. The turning your brain off mentality could easily lead to someone liking those movies or anything else. I don't watch Jurassic World and think "oh it's just a stupid dinosaur movie, gotta check my brain at the door." I left my brain on and everything worked out just fine. At the same time, 30 second death scenes that aren't meant to be more than "oh shit" moments don't register to me as flaws.

What sucks to me are little girls gymnastic-kicking velociraptors to their doom, a black guy comedically screaming at the camera before getting pounced by a raptor, a guy going to take a piss behind a tree and ending up 5 miles away from the group just to be eaten by compies (which lasted way longer than Zara's death by about four fucking minutes), the Mexican dude listening to fiesta music on his headphones in a dinosaur infested jungle (because I would also kick back and listen to music in that predicament) so that he can't her the dude being setup for a blatantly long and stupid death scene, and so many etceteras that it'd take a while to go through them all.
 
I had a feeling this movie would divide people from the first trailer. I remember half were saying "this looks so fucking terrible" and the other half were like "it's fucking JP I'm in" and that's barely changed.



I was watching a bit of the end while burning my BluRay last night and the final scene with the survivors gathered in that shelter made me think Trevor is a good fit for Star Wars. No, not the action stuff, it's those shots of people mulling around, the way he cuts dialogue together, etc, it actually reminded me of the "hangar" shots from the OT.

And I still like that scene where the IRex claw grabs that kid. That kid did a damn fine job: he's crying, but there's almost a moment of ACCEPTANCE on his face that he's about to dragged away by the IRex and it's a small moment no one else noticed, but I did in theaters and again on BluRay.
 
And I still like that scene where the IRex claw grabs that kid. That kid did a damn fine job: he's crying, but there's almost a moment of ACCEPTANCE on his face that he's about to dragged away by the IRex and it's a small moment no one else noticed, but I did in theaters and again on BluRay.

That's a fucking terrific moment for the reasons you mentioned, but the shooting style and editing on top of the music, as well as Nick's character having this look of "I don't think I can save him now" was legitimately terrifying. People say this movie doesn't have any suspense, but yeah I'm not seeing it. Just that one moment was about scarier than anything in the others.
 
Out of all the subliminal messages you could connect the imaginary dots with in this movie I figured the parallel to gun violence would be the main issue with Jurassic World.

Solving your Dinosaur problems with more Dinosaurs and seeing no consequences as a result.
 
For people against the Zara death scene: you want that scene deleted/ changed just because she's a woman. Think about that for a second.
I thought the scene was out of place but not because she was a woman. It was more that it was the sort of death that is usually only given to "deserving" characters and the only thing she had done was not be all that into babysitting someone else's kids. It actually took me out for a bit since I feel we've all been conditioned to view the scene the same way and I really didn't understand what they were trying to say.
 
I really think people need to take a breather on the Zara shit. Talk about how horrifying it was for what it was, not because speculation or assumptions.

Besides, it's fucking annoying to want to talk about something and one little nagging thing that a small percentage are screaming angry about dominates conversation ends up ruining discussion.

That's a fucking terrific moment for the reasons you mentioned, but the shooting style and editing on top of the music, as well as Nick's character having this look of "I don't think I can save him now" was legitimately terrifying. People say this movie doesn't have any suspense, but yeah I'm not seeing it. Just that one moment was about scarier than anything in the others.

I'm glad I'm not the only one that mentioned it.

And it's funny how when the film came out there were few people criticizing the kids. They did a fantastic job. While the older one has some annoying "typical teenager" scenes, when he's acting compassionate or protecting his little brother you actually feel it and root for them.
 
The only thing Jurassic World has over The Lost World is that it's not a fundamentally broken film that the director was clearly bored with. But it still has actual occasional cinematic direction from Steven Spielberg and Pete fucking Postlethwaite actually giving a damn for some reason while Jurassic World has boring consumer level direction from Colin Trevorrow and, uh, Chris Pratt giving his blandest performance ever. Jurassic World only slides by it by default, not because it's a much better film.

I really think people need to take a breather on the Zara shit. Talk about how horrifying it was for what it was, not because speculation or assumptions.

Besides, it's fucking annoying to want to talk about something and one little nagging thing that a small percentage are screaming angry about dominates conversation ends up ruining discussion.
Well, this topic is more or less about the scene in question. But I think if that's the topic that dominates conversation about the film that sounds more like the film's fault than the people discussing it.

Hey, I'm mocking the sentiments, you're mocking me.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
 
The only thing Jurassic World has over The Lost World is that it's not a fundamentally broken film that the director was clearly bored with. But it still has actual occasional cinematic direction from Steven Spielberg and Pete fucking Postlethwaite actually giving a damn for some reason while Jurassic World has boring consumer level direction from Colin Trevorrow and, uh, Chris Pratt giving his blandest performance ever. Jurassic World only slides by it by default, not because it's a much better film.

I think it's much better in about every way. I like the story and characters way more, which is a pretty big deal in of itself. You don't though, so I can see your personal reasoning. There's just so many reasons why I despise The Lost World and I don't think Jurassic World has nearly the amount of problems. To each his own though. I also find that most of these things do have "consumer level" direction, they're not indie or art house films. The original Jurassic Park certainly wasn't above consumer-level direction.

They're well directed. They're not going to win awards for directing. The original didn't and Jurassic World won't. If you're worried about that kind of directing, it's probably not for you.
 
The only thing Jurassic World has over The Lost World is that it's not a fundamentally broken film that the director was clearly bored with. But it still has actual occasional cinematic direction from Steven Spielberg and Pete fucking Postlethwaite actually giving a damn for some reason while Jurassic World has boring consumer level direction from Colin Trevorrow and, uh, Chris Pratt giving his blandest performance ever. Jurassic World only slides by it by default, not because it's a much better film.

Quoting myself from the Jurassic GAF thread because there is a lot of valid criticism in this thread regarding the Lost World that's worth exploring.

My biggest problem with the Lost World is that Spielberg asked Crichton to write a sequel after the success of Jurassic Park and Crichton wrote the novel as if it were a screenplay for Spielberg to use. The novel has great thematic material concerning mankinds relationship with the natural world and extinction. And there's great characters such as Levine whom provides an excellent foil and counterpoint to Malcolm. The characters in the novel confront and explore the novel's themes and narrative and it works really well.

And then Spielberg takes all of that and shits out a message movie about hunting and capturing animals with characters whom are literally two dimensional plot devices that move the movie from set-piece to action sequence, repeat ad nauseam.

I think Schindler's Lost got to Spielberg's head and it shows. He did Jurassic Park, then Schindler's List and finally received the accolades and recognition as a serious film maker he always wanted, and then followed that up with The Lost World. There is almost no joy or passion in this movie from Spielberg. Even Spielberg has negative comments about it. But that negativity and those short comings are of his own making. He had the material from Crichton, he just didn't give a shit.

Best soundtrack from the franchise though.

Jurassic World for all its faults works fundamentally better as a film because the people involved above all else are having fun. It's great entertainment. None of it challenges the viewers like the material in the Lost World novel though. I wish it was as thematically engaging as it is with its spectacle.
 
Zara was so one-note and forgettable I actually did think they gave some random woman the most brutal death in the film. Which only made it more WTF.
 
Jurassic World for all its faults works fundamentally better as a film because the people involved above all else are having fun. It's great entertainment. None of it challenges the viewers like the material in the Lost World novel though. I wish it was as thematically engaging as it is with its spectacle.

I agree with all that. The book version was definitely way better. The screenplay that Koepp wrote was just hysterically moronic. I definitely preferred the themes and ideas in Jurassic World over it. I also disagree with all of them that Malcolm should have been the protagonist. It's like making Jack Sparrow the protagonist. These are supporting characters that are cool because they act off of the main characters-- who are generally more chill-- but Ian Malcolm and Sparrow have these cartoony characteristics that tend to annoy or provoke the other characters.

So when you put a supporting character up front, it doesn't work anymore. Malcolm was almost entirely different in the second one, and that's just so jarring. It's just one of the many, many misfires of The Lost World.
 
I also find that most of these things do have "consumer level" direction, they're not indie or art house films. The original Jurassic Park certainly wasn't above consumer-level direction.

They're well directed. They're not going to win awards for directing. The original didn't and Jurassic World won't. If you're worried about that kind of directing, it's probably not for you.
The original Jurassic Park isn't exactly an art hause piece but Spielberg definitely has an eye for visually pleasing framing and I don't think Jurassic World has anything even remotely as memorable looking as some of Jurassic Park's most striking shots. Jurassic World looks more like it was shot for commercials. Flat lightning, weird color grading, and boring compositions. Well directed, maybe, I'll go "passable." Both not winning an award does not make them equivalent, and I think you do your arguments a continuing disservice by trying to constantly equivocate the two movies. It reads more like you're tearing Jurassic Park down than propping Jurassic World up.

Jurassic World for all its faults works fundamentally better as a film because the people involved above all else are having fun. It's great entertainment. None of it challenges the viewers like the material in the Lost World novel though. I wish it was as thematically engaging as it is with its spectacle.
Honestly, I don't really care for The Lost World novel either, it felt just as bored with itself as the film did, it's just not as broken. The Jurassic Park novel weaved its themes together with the subject matter very well, The Lost World's focus on evolution and its attempts to string it into the plot felt comparatively very ham-fisted and forced.
 
They probably cut all the parts that made Zara annoying and intolerable and probably would of cut her from the movie entirely if they didn't blow the whole budget on her death. I'm sure the parent's divorce drama was supposed to lead to something too but they forgot why they had some annoying kids in the movie in the first place.

The movie sucked ass but the hipster dude was funny.
 
The original Jurassic Park isn't exactly an art hause piece but Spielberg definitely has an eye for visually pleasing framing and I don't think Jurassic World has anything even remotely as memorable looking as some of Jurassic Park's most striking shots. Jurassic World looks more like it was shot for commercials. Flat lightning, weird color grading, and boring compositions. Well directed, maybe, I'll go "passable." Both not winning an award does not make them equivalent, and I think you do your arguments a continuing disservice by trying to constantly equivocate the two movies. It reads more like you're tearing Jurassic Park down than propping Jurassic World up.

Fuck that. I'd never tear down Jurassic Park. That being said I can argue things without wearing rose-tinted glasses. You're absolutely right in what you say about Jurassic Park, I just disagree that Jurassic World is bland looking or lacks the detail or whatever. It has plenty of well shot and gritty sequences. The entire last 30 minutes or so after the pteranodon attack looks fantastic and was put together wonderfully. Also they changed the color grading for the home video release, not sure if you saw it or not yet.

I think saying "shot for commercials" or whatever does a huge disservice to the cinematography in the film. There are a number of memorable shots, like the seats going down in the Mosasaur show and Claire standing before the Rex with the flare. Instantly classic stuff. I mean for me personally when I think about what I like to see in a Jurassic Park movie, shots like this immediately spring to mind, and it's not alone.

yO1y18V.jpg

And this one is fantastic to me, really reminds me of Italian horror from directors like Argento for example (Suspiria comes to mind) and it's in the same scene:

 
They probably cut all the parts that made Zara annoying and intolerable and probably would of cut her from the movie entirely if they didn't blow the whole budget on her death. I'm sure the parent's divorce drama was supposed to lead to something too but they forgot why they had some annoying kids in the movie in the first place.

The movie sucked ass but the hipster dude was funny.

Yep that's the core trouble. It keeps gesturing at things it doesn't resolve properly, in a way that just feels careless.
 
They probably cut all the parts that made Zara annoying and intolerable and probably would of cut her from the movie entirely if they didn't blow the whole budget on her death.

I'd say you're probably right about this considering how many things are cut in editing. It wouldn't surprise me at all if Zara had more screen time and dialogue.
 
I'd say you're probably right about this considering how many things are cut in editing. It wouldn't surprise me at all if Zara had more screen time and dialogue.

Right. There are *hints* of it in the film, but it never really turns into anything that you could sink your teeth into. ... ... :-) :-)
 
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