• Hey Guest. Check out your NeoGAF Wrapped 2025 results here!

Dating Age: Dating a single mom

Status
Not open for further replies.
Don't do it. Dating a chick with kids (that are not your own) at your age is a horrible idea. It sounds like you are not really that into her anyway. It might not be easy, but a clean break is the only way to approach this.
 
Single moms are all wackos. If they don't get you then the pissed off ex-daddy is sure to make life miserable for you...

Single moms are strictly there for the hit and run...
 
bard said:
1. Is she looking for a father? Many single moms are, and a lot of them really want to build that "family" unit, so be aware of that.

2. Like everyone's said, don't play games with her.

3. The kid will always come first, you'll just have to get used to it.

4. Other than skewing a few key factors to one side, it's still about you and her. If you like her, go for it. Just go slooooow.

Seriously man, listen to this. Particulalry about single moms looking for a father, I see that a lot. My wife has a single mom friend who wanted me to hook her up with someone. She told me she just wanted a casual relationship of some sort and I foolishly believed her. I heard back from the guy that I tried to set her up with that she was obviously only interested in a serious long-term daddy replacement, so it was a classic bait and switch.

And even if it's not an issue at the moment it eventually *will* seriously eat at you that you're not the kid's real dad. You can do better, trust me. I am a father myself. I believe that some of the people that are taking this part of it so lightly are not.
 
ForzaItalia said:
Single moms are all wackos. If they don't get you then the pissed off ex-daddy is sure to make life miserable for you...

Single moms are strictly there for the hit and run...

I would read your memoirs. Post them.
 
B!TCH said:
Was she married before?

If you like her enough, go for it. I assume you are old enough to want to settle with her if everything works out? The only problem I can see is if the kids dad is still in the picture. That can be a huge source of problems in the future so it's your call.

no she wasn't married, and yes she shares custody with the kid's dad
 
vangace said:
I have been seeing this girl, she has a daughter from a previous relationship. I really like her but I pretty sure my parents will not be too thrilled about it. I have been trying real hard to end the relationship but but I am afraid I am falling even deeper. I talked to my sister about it and she as i expected is totally against the idea. What do I do GAF.

Can you elaborate on why your parents would be against you seeing this girl? I dont see what the big deal is? So she has a child, so what. If you care about her, then thats all that matters.
 
Really, it depends on the girl. I've seen some single moms that are absolutely horrible, and some that are complete sweethearts.

If she's a good person, then go for it.

edit: Oh, and to add, I have no problem with the girl having a child. Absolutely none. I judge by character, not by how many kids she has.
 
bjork said:
It is, but it beats having kids get attached to some guy that's not gonna be around. Which isn't to say all guys would bail out, mind you.

I completely understand a single parent not introducing every single person they date to their children, so as not to disrupt their lives, but going potentially 18 years without a romantic/sex life seems unrealistic for a nonGAF member. :D
 
dead souls said:
I completely understand a single parent not introducing every single person they date to their children, so as not to disrupt their lives, but going potentially 18 years without a romantic/sex life seems unrealistic for a nonGAF member. :D

Well played. :lol
 
Dude, you're 28... your sister and parents need to back the fuck off.

But, on the real tip about dating single moms, it can go both ways. Half of them are the have-their-shit-together type that'll make you think twice about ever dating a non-MILF, and the other half are the type that make you think "OMG I'm changing my name and moving to Montana."

Figure out which she is first. If you feel any weirdness or think she's grooming you to be daddy, run, RUN MOTHAFUCKA THE CALLER IS IN THE HOUSE!!!

And do that before you lay some pipe if you can help it.

Also, if she goes to school or works a semi legit job, that's a plus. However, if she's jobless and pulling the mommy card, or slingin' burgers, well... that's not a killer, but I'd take it as a warning. I know from personal experience that gubbament check mommas and Mickey D's mommas will wreck your mind.
 
vangace said:
I am 28, she is 23. I have been seeing this girl, she has a daughter from a previous relationship. I really like her but I pretty sure my parents will not be too thrilled about it. I have been trying real hard to end the relationship but but I am afraid I am falling even deeper. I talked to my sister about it and she as i expected is totally against the idea. What do I do GAF.

You need to break up with her. She needs a man in her life, not a 28 year old moma's boy. Hope you like your basement appartment. BTW, do you call your parent's room mates?
 
mosaic said:
But, on the real tip about dating single moms, it can go both ways. Half of them are the have-their-shit-together type that'll make you think twice about ever dating a non-MILF, and the other half are the type that make you think "OMG I'm changing my name and moving to Montana."

Figure out which she is first. If you feel any weirdness or think she's grooming you to be daddy, run, RUN MOTHAFUCKA THE CALLER IS IN THE HOUSE!!!

Yeah, be sure to get a clear read on that as soon as possible and if its the crazy shit... BAIL OUT. But if its the good kind, and you're feeling her as much as you think you are then give a long-term relationship a serious thought. Single moms are great when you have actual good, honest relationships with them. The good ones that is - I can't reiterate that enough.
 
head on...apply directly to your forehead
head on...apply directly to your forehead
head on...apply directly to your forehead
 
I've passed on good women over family hangups. Trust me, that shit hurts when I'm waking up alone in my bed.

Don't be like me.
 
I'm 31 and have a little bit of realationship experience under my belt. I can say that if you have strong feelings for this woman and are completely fine with the fact that she has a child, then what everyone else thinks (including your parent's is irrelavent). Some people never find a deep relationship and live lonely lives. Just ask some of the poor saps here on gaming age. Be thankful you found someone that you connect with.

I would be a man and see where this relationship leads.
 
Hello Gaffers.

I just ended a relationship with a single mom a few hours ago. I laughed out loud when I saw this thread popping up. She was a girl i knew in highschool, got in contact with her by facebook, she was still with the father of her kid when we met; but her relationship was going down the drain.

Went out a few times, in secret; we quickly found out we had many, many things in common; and things were going well.

Hell since she lives a bit far away, and with her kid also, we used to talk a lot of phone and over the webcam once in a while. Turns out, in the past week, her kid started talking about me and how funny and great I was and how I would make her laugh to her father.

He.. didnt take that very well. At all. I kind of understand him.. they are going through the whole separation motions and so on, and out of nowhere the kid starts talking about another guy (on the same week they were planning to meet up and decide what to do with the house, etc).. I'd be Who the FUck is that clown, too. He called her and was enraged at the whole thing, asking who the fuck I was, how come the kid knew me, and how it seemed that me and the mom were spending lots of time together, and how he still loved her and bla bla I was probably just there to jump her and bla bla bla

She bought it.

The idiot didnt do anything at all. She didnt defend me, she didnt even had the guts to admit about our recent developpement, nothing at all. This morning while I was at work, she came over chat, to tell me about the whole thing, and what happened, and said that she didnt know what to do. I told her it was getting complicated, and that it wasnt worth shitting up the relationship with the father of her kid over me; and that I decided that I would fall back instead of risking more drama and so on.

She was a year older than me. She was a cool chick, but sorry, if you cant sort your shit out, i'm not interested, and failing to admit to him that she was seeing him was a relationship breaker for me, and how she almost bought the whole thing. She told me she didnt want to make decisions, bla bla, sorry I wont be toyed with.

It's not worth it, unless you are 100% sure that the ex is far, far away. Also be ready to get attached to the kids.

Oh well
 
i don't get the big deal. if you are falling for her, go for it. if its just the sex, then make it last as long as possible. forget the kid, forget your parents, take care of #1. that's you buddy. after you do the right thing for yourself, then consider other people's feelings.

the relationship will probably fail anyway but who cares. hopefully the kid is young enough that she won't remember you when you leave her mom.
 
SnakeswithLasers said:
Is it YOUR mom?
:lol :lol

Darko said:
gun-glock-by-smarterlam-at-flickr-163692235_09727fcbdd.jpg
:lol :lol :lol :lol

vangace said:
Dating Age: Dating a single mom
meh!
 
vangace said:
I have been seeing this girl, she has a daughter from a previous relationship. I really like her but I pretty sure my parents will not be too thrilled about it. I have been trying real hard to end the relationship but but I am afraid I am falling even deeper. I talked to my sister about it and she as i expected is totally against the idea. What do I do GAF.


You're 28 and not capable of making up your own mind about an issue like this. So do the woman and her child a favour and drop it, because you're not going to be much help for the kid if you're not even capable of helping yourself.
 
Personally, I would never date a woman with a kid that's not my own... and I'm surprised so much of GAF supports this. Then again I'm a fairly picky person. What could ever possess someone to invest time and resources into raising someone that doesn't bear your own genetics?
 
djtiesto said:
Personally, I would never date a woman with a kid that's not my own... and I'm surprised so much of GAF supports this. Then again I'm a fairly picky person. What could ever possess someone to invest time and resources into raising someone that doesn't bear your own genetics?

That's only cause gaffers would want a shot with the kid as well.
 
djtiesto said:
Personally, I would never date a woman with a kid that's not my own... and I'm surprised so much of GAF supports this. Then again I'm a fairly picky person. What could ever possess someone to invest time and resources into raising someone that doesn't bear your own genetics?

What do you think about adoption?
 
djtiesto said:
Personally, I would never date a woman with a kid that's not my own... and I'm surprised so much of GAF supports this. Then again I'm a fairly picky person. What could ever possess someone to invest time and resources into raising someone that doesn't bear your own genetics?

I can't understand this kind of bullshit.

I hope you're never single once you pass the 30-40 year old mark then. A large portion of the dating pool for a middle-aged person probably has at least one kid.
 
elektrikluv said:
What do you think about adoption?

I have absolutely no problem with adoption if a couple is unable to have kids by traditional methods.

dead souls said:
I can't understand this kind of bullshit.

I hope you're never single once you pass the 30-40 year old mark then. A large portion of the dating pool for a middle-aged person probably has at least one kid.

What's there to not understand about it? Also after reading page 2 (I jumped ahead a bit and posted when most of the responses were all for dating single moms), reading shuri's and other people's posts... a lot of it seems even more trouble than it's worth, irregardless of the whole genetics factor.
 
Dating a mum sucks ass. I hate to sound like a selfish prick but there's just too much time split for the kids for a fun relationship IMO
 
My dad married a single mom when he was 29, they had me and my youngest sister, and they're celebrating their 20th anniversary tomorrow.

Go for it.
 
Tyrannical said:
You need to break up with her. She needs a man in her life, not a 28 year old moma's boy. Hope you like your basement appartment.

This is the first time I agree with something Tyrannical wrote.

To the OP, the problem is not her, it's you. You need to grow a pair, stat!
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top Bottom