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Death in the Family

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miyuru

Member
Apparently my aunt's unborn child has died. And out of all my relatives, she's definitely the most cheerful/innocent.

I totally can't believe this. It's ridiculous. I don't know how long she's been pregnant for, I'd guess 6-7 months. By that point, you're already planning for the baby pretty hardcore. I can't imagine how they feel, especially their daughter who's like 6...how's she going to understand any of this?

I don't even feel like studying anymore, hopefully my supervisor will let me take tomorrow off work too (is there some sort of law for this in Alberta?).

Man, I dunno, after my mom told me, I totally just couldn't read my textbook anymore, your mind just races at 100mph, and I can't get it to stop.
 

White Man

Member
I'm sorry to hear this. My condolences. You'd think I had advice on mourning by this point, but it's really a personal thing -- not a private thing, but just something that's radically different from person to person. I hope all is otherwise well. So it goes.
 

keiichi

Member
Dude, that's fucked up.

Not much anyone can say to help alleviate you and your families pain.

My condolences.
 

Beezy

Member
I feel for you and your family man, especially the 6 year old daughter. The same thing happened to my mother when I was either 6 or 7, but she was closer to 9 months. She was going into labor one night and my father and older brother went to the hospital with her. A few hours later, my father came back home to get some stuff for my mother. He had this blank expression on his face when he told my sister and I that the baby died. I don't remember exactly how I reacted when he said that, but I do remember crying myself to sleep and not going to school the next day.

All I can really say is try not to think about it too much. Shit like that causes you to get real pissed off.
 

miyuru

Member
I've just never had to really deal with, well, death.

And even for an unborn child, it's scary to think about. It's depressing, wondering what life was lost, what potential has been taken away, what future cousin I could've had.

I suppose perhaps that it was best the baby die now than later though.
 

Ecrofirt

Member
we had a death today as well.
My grandmother's boyfriend was found dead in his house this evening. He was 80, but i really good health. It was a total shocker, and I'm still really upset about it.
 

way more

Member
I think we're all very sorry. As for comforting her don't try to rationalize this, don't try to explain it or make sense of the death. You need to be supportive and listen more then anything.
 

miyuru

Member
Ecrofirt said:
we had a death today as well.
My grandmother's boyfriend was found dead in his house this evening. He was 80, but i really good health. It was a total shocker, and I'm still really upset about it.

Damn, that really sucks. I think that's the worst part - it's unexpected.

I mean my aunt was the last thing on my mind. To hear something like this, it totally takes you aback :-\
 

way more

Member
Maybe that sounds aloof, but its devastating to hear someone say, "You can always try again," or "It's better now for this to happen then after you've grown attached." They will open up to you when they see your compassion and willingness to understand, but be active and let them know you care.
 

Pochacco

asking dangerous questions
My condolences.
I too haven't had much experience with death.

The only deaths that I've experienced in my family were my grandfathers - but both of them were sick for some time before they passed away. It wasn't anything sudden like an accident, etc. I can't imagine, and hope I don't ever have to, the feeling of somebody leaving so suddenly.
 
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